Audrey cries from the moment she wakes up and rolls over to demand I tell her something wonderful about my shithole town. I refuse to open my eyes because I’m tired from her taunting my dick all night. Her hand takes mine and strokes my index finger across her wet cheek. Relenting to her sadness, I roll over and open my eyes.

“White Horse has a bacon-themed restaurant.”

Audrey blinks a few times. “Bacon?”

“It’s half a block from Kitsch Kitchenette, so you could walk over for lunch.”

“Are these places small like that sandwich shop?”

“Yes. That was Cricket’s idea after businesses kept failing on Main Street. She thought too many restaurants and shops were niche and couldn’t bring in enough business to pay the rent. So we remodeled the locations by cutting the sizes in half. We get the same rent, businesses can stay open with their niche incomes, and Main Street has a funky feel that you can’t get in the neighboring towns.”

“Cricket sounds smart.”

“She is, but she’s also stupid. My sister knows how to balance shit out.”

“I wish I was closer to my sisters and brother.”

“Then be close to them.”

“It’s not that easy.”

“Of course, it is. You just choose to spend time with them. I don’t love golf, but I choose to go weekly with my dad and brother. Cricket used to come along more until my youngest nephew was born. I know she doesn’t enjoy golf, but she does enjoy hanging out with us.”

“But you’re all the same kind of people. Rando and Lily are nothing like me.”

“Chipper’s wife is nothing like the rest of us. Her snark is at normal human levels, and she would never think to torment her enemies. Now that doesn’t mean she isn’t wildly amused when we torment her enemies. It’s just she wasn’t raised like us. Does that mean she can’t have fun? Of course not. Does that mean we don’t make sure she’s having fun? Of course not. It’s a choice to enjoy your family,” I say and sit up. “Well, I’m sure there are some families with people in them who are so fucking awful that nothing can be done, but you don’t have that problem.”

“No, I don’t.”

“And that’s why your family is always welcome in White Horse. Though there’s no way in hell that I’m letting your uncle hold our kids.”

Despite her wet cheeks, Audrey laughs. “We’re on the same page there.”

“Not that a weird kid would be so bad. The mini-twins are going through a truly odd phase that I find extremely entertaining. It’s all how you look at a situation.”

Audrey jumps up from the bed. “I’m ready to move. Let’s go eat downstairs and build up our energy.”

“Considering the amount of crying you’re bound to do today, I suggest you fill up on liquids.”

“Fuck you in your giant ass,” she taunts before disappearing into the bathroom.

I’m not wrong about her crying. Audrey gets going again when a crying Farah meets her at the front door. They hug and promise to text every hour and send lots of pictures. While the women say goodbye for thirty minutes, I attach the trailer with her Harley to the back of my truck and move all her boxes.

Through everything, Cooper watches me from the front porch. I choose to say, “hi” whenever I pass him. He grunts his irritation the first few times before deciding to ignore me the dozen following times. I ought to leave the old man alone, but I just keep saying hello to irritate him.

Finally, once I’m done packing her belongings, and Audrey finishes her goodbyes, I stop on the porch to face Cooper.

“You know I won’t let anyone fuck with her,” I say, staring out at the misty afternoon.

“I’m more concerned with you fucking with her.”

“I get that, and nothing I say will change your feelings on the matter. She’s your baby girl, and I’m the man stealing her away. If you didn’t think I was an asshole, I don’t know if I’d respect you.”

“I don’t give a flying fuck if you respect me.”

Glancing at him, I smirk. “We both know that shit is a bald-faced fucking lie, but I won’t rub it in since you’re nursing a sad heart today.”

“Asshole.”

Leaving him to sulk, I walk inside where Audrey forces me to pick her up and carry her out of the house. She hangs over my shoulder, crying while telling her mom once again how she’ll see her soon and call constantly and never forget her.

Another man might be bothered by the dramatics, but my sister routinely turns a simple emotional situation into an over-the-top clusterfuck. Something about amping up the theatrics during a painful or scary moment helps Cricket cope. I assume Audrey’s thinking is similar—whether she knows it or not.