Chapter 7

Mandy

I couldn’t believe it. I was having a good time with Savior. A man who could be pretty damn charming when he wasn’t waking up with a big bag of regret. I found myself laughing more than I had in far too long. It was probably the vodka. Okay it was mostly the vodka, but it was also him. In my mind, Savior was still the unreliable man who’d ditched me the minute he’d gotten stateside and couldn’t be bothered with the boring details of being a teenager. That wasn’t him any more than the card-counting delinquent was still me.

I let the vodka do its thing, let it relax my mind and my body until the awkward disappeared and all that was left were two people connected by their memories and grief of the same person.

“He would be so thrilled with all the businesses you guys have.” Ammo was proud of the Reckless Bastards and to see them thriving the way Savior described, I could admit a certain warmth blossomed in my chest.

He grinned in that way he had that made him look almost like a boy. No, not a boy but just a man who didn’t have ghosts, demons. Skeletons. His eyes were clear and his smile wide. “We have Ammo O.G. that we grow ourselves. It’s our biggest seller, especially ‘cause it’s some kick ass weed.”

Now that would have tickled my brother like crazy. “I wish he could’ve seen that.”

I could see Ammo strutting around in what passed for heaven for guys like him, bragging about being a celebrity. It’d been a long time since I could think of my brother without sadness. Pouring the last of the vodka in our glasses, I held it up.

“To the best brother around. May he be shocking angels and heathens alike, wherever he is.”

“Damn straight,” Savior said and knocked the vodka back with a grimace. “It’s good to remember. Sometimes I forget it all. It’s easier.”

I sighed, nodding. “Most of the time I wish I could. I tried forgetting but now that it’s only me, I have to remember. If I ever have a family, they’ll want to know about how well my mom sang or how my dad did the best card tricks. They won’t know the dirty jokes that Ammo horrified me with when I was too young to hear them. So, I remember.”

For an uncertain future I wasn’t sure I even wanted.

“Are you drunk enough to spill your secrets yet?”

Just the sound of his voice, so deep and rumbly, made me smile. But a moment later as his question sank in, I felt the smile fade.

“No offense, but I’ll never be drunk enough for that.” It wasn’t a big secret, but it was mine and he’d given up the right to ask.

“Come on, how bad could it be? Prostitution?”

I laughed bitterly. “Yeah, right. If I’d done that we might have actually crossed paths back then.” It was no secret that the Reckless Bastards had been in on the ass business well before it became fashionable. With it now legalish, I was sure they made bank.

“That’s a fucking relief.” He smacked the sofa as his body sank deeper into it. “If it’s not that, just tell me.” He was insistent and the more he drank the more his guilt showed. Now that he knew I hadn’t been out there putting a price tag on my body, his guilt seemed to lessen, but not by much.

Good. He should feel guilty. I didn’t want him carrying some burden, but he and all the Reckless Bastards had let me down.

“Look Savior, I don’t need you to feel guilty for not keeping your promise to Ammo. I’m sure he wouldn’t either because everything turned out fine. Just drop it.”

“I really am sorry. There’s no excuse and I’m grateful I’ll never get the ass kicking I deserve from Ammo.”

“Don’t think you’re going to heaven?”

He laughed. “Sweetheart if I make it up there he can kick my ass daily.”

“At any rate, I don’t need your guilt so get over yourself.”

“Then why don’t you want anything to do with us?”

I shook my head. “Because I’m still not your responsibility. And even if you or any of the other Bastards think otherwise, I wouldn’t trust you to have my back anyway.”

“Damn.”

That one word held so much emotion, like a perfect bite of food. He was shocked, hurt even.

“You don’t pull any punches.”

“Well, you won’t stop pushing. Now you know what the deal is, you don’t have to keep checking up on me. I’ve learned how to take care of myself over the years.”

His dark brows rose suspiciously. “Even those goons from the parking lot?”

“They’re not the first goons I’ve come across.” But with any luck, they would be the last. Goons were all fine and good in the movies, in real life they were a lot dumber and ten times as dangerous. “Like I said, I can take care of myself.”

Savior tried to stand and stumbled. Since it was the first time he stood in hours it was clear he was drunker than he thought.

“Shit.”

He wobbled and pointed at me. “For the record sweet Mandy, I don’t do shit I don’t want to do.”

Savior dropped back down onto my sofa and I stood, scanning the room for a bucket even though I was pretty sure I didn’t have a bucket at all.

“Fine. Just lie down and don’t puke on my shit.” I pushed him onto his back and went to pour a cup of water. “Drink this.”

“I’m fine. Not the first time I’ve been drunk before, tough ass.”

I laughed and took off his ridiculously heavy motorcycle boots. At least I assumed they were the real article, but they could just as easily be a fashion statement.

“I’m not surprised but unlike your tree house, I care if you get puke all over my stuff.”

“Club house.”

“What?” He couldn’t be that drunk, could he? Not when I only had a nice buzz going.

“It’s a club house not a fucking tree house. We’re men, not elves.”

My whole body shook with laughter. “I don’t know, Savior, your club shares plenty of similarities with elves. The only real difference is your size.”

One eye popped open, as blue as the sky. “Am I that drunk or did you seriously just compare my club to elves?”

“Both of those things are true, old man. You can sleep on the sofa until you’re sober enough to drive home.” I grabbed his chin until he opened both eyes and yeah, he was beautiful but that wasn’t the point. “But I don’t need you to check up on me, okay?”

He nodded and as I stepped back two big arms wrapped around me and pulled me down onto him.

“You talk too much,” he said and then speared both hands through my short hair and kissed me like I was his favorite brand of biker whiskey.

I should have pulled back, but I didn’t. I couldn’t. He tasted too good, felt too fucking good with his hard body pressed up against mine. I wished we were naked because he was growing harder by the second and my body was hot, wet and ready. But we weren’t doing that. Fuck.

“That’s a novel way to shut someone up.”

He flashed a lazy grin, his eyes still closed as his thumb brushed my jaw. “I check up on you because I want to. I fucked you because you’re hot and I will fuck you again,” he grinned but it was softer, and I knew he was seconds from passing out. “And again.”

I slid off his body as soon as his deep, even breaths sounded. Grabbing the debris from the table and putting it away before I closed myself up in my bedroom. I slid into the bed and clenched my knees tight beneath my comforter as I drifted off to sleep, telling my body not to think or dream about the big, blue-eyed devil asleep on my sofa.

Yeah, sometimes my body could be a real bitch.

***

“You want time off?” Landry’s voice bellowed just as he meant it to. He loved to draw attention whenever he could, but especially when he wanted to humiliate someone. It was how he got his chubby little cock hard.

“I’m asking for next Saturday off, yes.” With my arms crossed, I stood with a blank expression on my face and waited for him to respond.

“Get a load of hot shit Sutton, guys. She wants Saturday off, our busiest day.” He laughed, clutching his swollen gut as his dark eyes glared at me. “Do you have a fancy Hollywood party to go to where you pretend you and only you are responsible for the delicious confections that come out of my kitchen?”

“Since this is Las Vegas, no, no Hollywood party.” The rest of that statement didn’t warrant a response. Though Vegas had its own over the top culinary flair, Landry pretended like this was New York in the eighties. The only cutthroat person around was him, but his toxic personality turned the culinary press against him. And he was powerless to change it because he saw himself as flawless.

“I hear Dinah and Dean have booked a table for Saturday, I should call and let them know it’s not my dessert they’ll be eating,” I said.

“Absolutely not! Worried they’ll like my food better than yours?” he taunted like the sniveling little shit bastard he was. “Let’s see what they have to say.” Meaning he would lay the blame on me when they hated it.

“Sure,” I told him easily because the truth was, one of their production assistants had already called and I let it slip. Totally accidentally, of course. “So, next Saturday?”

He was already distracted, probably thinking of all the desserts he could fuck up and blame on me. “Yeah, sure. Take it off.”

I turned on my heels with a smile, walking away quickly before he remembered he changed his mind. My shift was over and I was ready to go home and put my feet up. Landry had me come in early to help with egg whites but I knew he really wanted to punish me for getting another mention from a critic. It was nice, but none of it really mattered because when I left Knead for good, I’d still need a recommendation from Landry.

I stopped just inside the exit to send a quick text to Teddy, letting her know she could count me among the guests for Jana and Max’s upcoming wedding. Now I had to find a dress and shoes and all that other crap that went along with dressing up, since the last time I dressed up it was to put my brother’s body in the ground. I wasn’t about to wear a funeral dress to a wedding.

The temperature had been in the high eighties all day, making the kitchen even hotter than the ten million ovens going at once. Now that the sun was so close to the horizon, the weather and the view was just about perfect. The light breeze whipped through my red V-neck tee, cooling my damp skin underneath. Cool air smacked against my nipples and just like that, I was back there, the night I buried Ammo, with Savior’s mouth closed around one stiff peak, staring at me with that wicked smile I couldn’t resist. Especially not in the thick of my grief over losing my older brother. My protector.

Even in my haze I made it to my car without being assaulted or accosted by anyone. Then a fucking brick came sailing through the back window, luckily, on the passenger side.

“Son of a bitch!”

I looked over my shoulder just in time to see some asshole in a hoodie running away. I didn’t know who it was, but I knew what he wanted.

To send a message.

Yeah, yeah. They wanted my skill at counting cards. I got it. Too bad they couldn’t have it. I put the car in drive and made my way home. I still hadn’t figured out what to do about Krissy and her thugs, but I would. And then this shit would stop.

“Hey, Mandy!”

I froze at the unfamiliar voice, clutching my keys between my fingers as I turned and stepped back.

“Oh, shit, Teddy. What’s up?”

“Not as enthusiastic as I was hoping for, but we’ll work on it. Shopping. I figured you probably wanted to do some shopping for San Diego and I came as support.”

“Who said I needed support?”

“Oh please. We both know you’ll go into the first boutique you find, grab something black or maybe plain blue you can wear again and again. I can help without taking all day.”

I was still skeptical. I liked Teddy just fine, yet, the last thing I wanted was to spend more time shopping.

Then, she sweetened the offer. “I’ll buy you a burger and a beer after.”

One look at her welcoming smile and my resistance melted in the Vegas sun. “Sold.”

She flashed a satisfied grin. “Good. I’ll wait until you’ve had a drink or two before I ask you what the hell happened to your window.” I groaned and she just laughed. “I’ll even let you take a shower first.”

“Wow, Teddy, and they say models are mean.”

She laughed at my deadpan delivery. “I’m a former model so maybe I’m losing my edge.”

“Yeah, right. You’re the type of chick born with an edge.” She was confident and tough, beautiful but not all in your face about it.

“Nah. Trust me, it was hard earned.”

There was a story there but we didn’t know each other well enough to share those kinds of secrets. She got in her car, followed me home and I welcomed her inside my apartment. “Now go get clean,” she said, “and I’ll wait out here.”

“Sure,” I said uncertainly as she began to look at my few books and pictures.

It didn’t take me long to scrub the kitchen stink off me and it had very little to do with the fact that Teddy was wandering loose inside my apartment. I didn’t waste time in the shower, ever.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t snoop,” she assured me when I returned to the living room. “I prefer to pry the info from my prey.”

The gleam in her eyes would’ve frightened me if there were anything remotely interesting about me. “You’d be disappointed.”

“Somehow I doubt that. Especially considering the energy I saw zapping between you and Savior.”

I shook my head. “Don’t even think about it. There’s nothing there and there’s nothing interesting about me.”

“I’ll be the judge of that.”

I guessed this was what I got for wanting friends.