Chapter Twelve — Allie
Cooper flew back to LA the following morning after a final visit with my dad at the hospital. I knew work was stacking up and he couldn’t possibly stay forever, but sending him off at the airport turned out to be harder than I’d imagined. He’d promised to fly back as soon as possible to visit—but I knew the reality was work would probably keep him busy for at least a couple of weeks. As the CEO, it wasn’t something easy he could put on the back burner for a weekend, at least not in Cooper’s world. He was much too involved for that to ever work.
Two weeks flew by, and with each day, my life in LA was beginning to feel more and more like some kind of dream I’d cooked up. My life with Cooper seemed especially far away. I missed him like crazy, even though we talked at least once a day and kept things alive with spicy pictures and text messages. I didn’t regret my decision to stay and care for my dad, but the trade off was steep.
Caring for my dad was getting easier every day, and we had a home nurse come to deal with the medical needs, but it was my job to entertain him, make sure he took his medicine on time, and had enough to eat. I was working on convincing him to go vegan, but that was an uphill battle. He was mostly in good spirits and we’d had a chance to reconnect as father and daughter in a special way that made it easier to stay, even though I missed Sam, Cooper, my friends, and my job.
On my mom’s day off from work, she insisted on taking my dad to physical therapy, in order to give me the day off, leaving me alone at the house with nothing to do. I’d called Cooper twice, but had been forced to leave voicemails. I knew he’d call me back as soon as he got free, but the disappointment still stung. I was about to go out for a walk to get my mind off of everything, when my phone rang. I smiled when I saw Hannah’s name on the screen and immediately answered the call. “You have no idea how happy I am that you called just now!”
“Happy to help! How’s it going over there?”
I sighed and folded my legs up under me on the couch. “It’s okay, I guess. My dad’s doing great, and that’s what really matters. I just miss LA.”
“Missing your man, huh?” Hannah said, an edge of gentle teasing in her voice.
“Well obviously!” I said, laughing with her.
“Sooo…spill! What’s it like dating a billionaire?” Hannah squealed.
“Well it’s not all pricey champagne and first class travel, if that’s what you’re thinking!” I answered with a laugh. In truth, I’d never worked harder than since meeting Cooper, but that was how I preferred it. I didn’t want to be kept and locked away in a tower somewhere, even if the tower was plated with gold and fully air conditioned. “Honestly, most of the time I forget he even has that much money.”
“Oh right, listen, I’ve seen some of the jewelry he’s bought you. It’s pretty freaking obvious to the rest of us that he’s loaded.”
I laughed and knew I couldn’t defend that. Cooper did like to spoil me with nice things. “True, but right now I miss him, not the stuff he can buy me. I guess, I’m feeling kind of torn. I want to be here to help out, and seeing my family and getting that back on track has been really good for me. I’m feeling a lot more grounded, and not so tangled up in hurt from the past, but at the same time, I feel so out of place here. There isn’t much grace for a tattooed, biker chick in a small town like this. I can’t really go anywhere without attracting a bunch of attention, even though people know who I am, which is super annoying. And without a job, it’s isolating. I mean, I spend most of my days cooking for my dad and watching re-runs of old sitcoms on TV with him.”
“So, what are you gonna do? Are you going to come home?”
I chewed my lip. “Probably in a few weeks. Cooper’s coming to visit this weekend so I’ll talk to him and see what he thinks. Right now he’s been so busy with work, I don’t want to burden him with anything else.”
Hannah sighed. “Allie, you’re not burdening him by talking about your problems or expressing your thoughts. Listen, I know you’re the tough, independent, don’t need nobody chick, but he’s your boyfriend, he’s supposed to be the one you do life with. Right?”
“I guess you’re right. The idea is just so foreign to me. Like you said, I’m used to doing it all on my own.”
“I know, and I admire you for that, but even strong people need a break sometimes, you know? I mean, if you guys get married, are you just going to keep two separate lives? He has his problems, you have yours, and that’s it?”
“I guess not,” I agreed quietly. Hannah quickly changed the topic and started rambling on about the newest guy she’d met at the club and hooked up with, easily filling the hour before my parents got home for dinner.
When I went to sleep that night—after a particularly hot sexting session with Cooper—Hannah’s advice came back to me and I wondered why it was so easy for me to share certain parts of myself and my life with Cooper, but not others? By now, he’d seen me at my best and my worst, so what was I afraid of?
I couldn’t figure it out, but I knew I needed to find the answer before we’d ever be able to move on, into the next phase of our relationship…whatever that might be.