Chapter 1

Mandy

It’s been months since I made the move back to Las Vegas, but it still felt surreal being here. No matter where I went, the supermarket, the hairdresser, the park, I expected to see Ammo’s loose-legged walk and dimpled smile coming my way, a smart retort on the tip of his tongue. But working at Knead kept me busy, which I needed in order to keep me from succumbing to the darkness that always seemed to hover around the edges of my life. Right now, my life was boring and completely predictable and I knew that sounded terrible, but to me it was perfect.

I’d plenty of excitement in my life. Losing both of my parents tragically and then my brother, living on the streets of Las Vegas while said brother was off fighting a war that hadn’t yet taken him from me. So, boring suited me just fine. I didn’t go out on my days off from work, just relaxed at home catching up on chores, my favorite television shows and reading trashy romance. Some days it felt as though I would die of boredom but it would be preferable to dying any other way.

But even the work day had to end, and at a little after seven I removed my apron and chef hat, grabbed my bag, and exited through the back of the restaurant. The parking lot wasn’t all that well lit, but I had pepper spray on my keychain and my biggest key clutched between my fingers, a trick all girls from the big city learn early. Or else.

“Yo, Mandy!”

I froze at the sound of my name. Other than the people at Knead, I didn’t know anyone in this city any longer, which meant it was someone I used to know. I turned slowly, ready to pounce if I needed to. Instead I only had to bite back a groan at the sight of my former friend, and I mean that in the loosest definition of the word.

“Krissy.”

She hadn’t changed much in the last decade, a little older with a few gray sprouts, more noticeable because of her shiny black hair. She had a few fine lines around her pale blue eyes and she was thinner than she used to be, but otherwise she looked exactly the same.

“I heard you were back.”

“I am.”

I left this place ten years ago and she was a big part of the reason why. I did plenty of shit I wasn’t proud of back then, all in the name of survival, and I didn’t regret it. For me though, it couldn’t go on forever. Using a fake I.D. in a city like this was asking for trouble. And card counting? Plenty of people had ended up buried in the desert for that particular sin. I had a knack for counting cards even as a teenager, and Krissy was quick to pick up on it and capitalize on it. She finagled a way to get me the I.D. so we could take the casinos for enough cash to make it from one month to the next.

“How’ve you been?” She looked at me now, the same way she did when I was sixteen and alone for the first time in my life. Like a predator who found the biggest, juiciest target just lying around.

“I’m good, Krissy. You?”

“Better now that you’re back. I missed you.”

I snorted my disbelief at that. “Right. What’s this about?”

“You don’t believe me?”

“No, I don’t. We were useful to each other, but that’s it. If you leave, you’re dead to me. Remember?” She’d said those words to me the night before I put this fucking town in my rear view. Krissy wanted to scam and scheme forever. Not me. I wanted more out of life.

She brushed the words away with a dismissive flip of her hand. “I was upset.” She smiled in the way she used to do that I’d always mistook for care. It was plain old manipulation. “How long have you been back?”

“A while.”

“You weren’t going to look me up?”

“No.”

I’d hopped on a bus that took me all the way to the other side of the country but I’d only gotten as far as Colorado before I realized Krissy wasn’t my friend. And had never been my friend.

“Then I guess it’s a good thing I found you because –”

I held up a hand. “You can stop right there. I didn’t come back for you or for that and I’m not doing it, so whatever you’re thinking you better find someone else.” I walked away, still staring at Krissy because I didn’t trust her as far as I could throw her scrawny ass.

“It’s like that now?”

I nodded and her friendly smile hardened. “I need your help.”

“I can’t help you.”

“You can,” she insisted.

“Fine, then I won’t.” She glared at me and walked away. I had a feeling, though, it wouldn’t be the last I saw of the woman who taught me that no one could be trusted.

By the time I made it back to the shithole apartment I rented, I was in a bad mood and ready to fight someone. Anyone. I hated seeing Krissy again, reminding me of who I used to be. More importantly, of how stupid and naïve I used to be. Never again.

“Ugh!” I said out loud to the closet as I kicked off my shoes. I hated that seeing her brought up all those memories and emotions. Feelings I’d worked hard to bury ever since a certain blue-eyed biker reminded me why feelings were total bullshit.

I made a sub and killed three beers while I binge-watched TV until I passed out on the sofa. I’d nearly made it a full night without thinking about Ammo.

***

My first day off in almost two weeks and I’d decided to spend it tracking Savior down. I must be out of my mind to willingly face the source of my greatest rejection. But I knew returning my brother’s leather vest with the Reckless Bastards insignia to his other family would mean a lot to Ammo. Which meant it was, literally, the least I could do.

After I spent the morning cleaning my apartment, doing a load of laundry and picking up groceries, I jumped in my used blue sedan and made my way to the converted airplane hangar that was their clubhouse. The closer I came to the frosted glass doors, the more anxious I became and with a striking blonde standing sentry at the door, overnight shipping seemed like a better option. Then she turned her head toward the sun and a serene smile tilted her full lips. “Now that’s a smile I’d kill to have,” I told her honestly, startling her.

“You can have the smile, it was as phony as a two-dollar bill.”

Funny. I introduced myself because I wasn’t a caveman and because I wanted to assure her I wasn’t here to snag one of her biker boyfriends. “Mandy.”

“Teddy,” she said. “I’m Teddy and I’m only here because my babysitter made me come.” Her smile was genuine this time, filled with a hint of sarcasm and mischief.

I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had a real conversation like this with another woman, or with anyone really. Despite the sexist views of society that women belonged in the kitchen, professional kitchens were dominated by men. Even on the pastry side, dicks ruled the world. But Teddy was edgy and kind of snarky, a contrast to her classic beauty. “I’m just here to return something to … the club.” No need to mention Savior.

Her eyes flashed with recognition and we spent a few minutes discussing the write-up I’d gotten and asking me about wedding cakes. She wanted something special for a friend, wanted to know if I was up for it.

I nodded and she said, “My bag is inside, but please don’t leave without exchanging contact info.”

I promised, feeling awkward as a tall, gorgeous man with long blond hair exited and took a protective stance behind her. “Nice to meet you,” I told her and steeled my nerves to go inside when Savior came out. “Just the person I came to see.”

“Mandy? What are you doing here?” He looked at me warily, like I was planning to make a scene. Typical man. Give him one night of hot sex and he thinks you’re ready to wear his ring.

“Don’t worry,” I told him as he led me to escape a loud gang of partiers. We found our way down a dark hall to a stark room with a twin bed, a dresser and photos of bikini-clad women on the wall. “I’m not here for a repeat performance. This was in some of the things I put in storage after the funeral. I know Ammo would want you guys to have it.” I handed him the jacket, making sure our fingers didn’t touch at all. That was a temptation I didn’t need or want.

“You should have told me,” he said, just as my hand landed on the doorknob. His voice was deep and angry, eager like he’d been waiting for a chance to get this off his chest.

I sighed and whirled on him, now pissed off. Between Savior’s indignation, Krissy’s harassment and my boss Landry’s total asshole-ness, I was losing my grasp on patience.

“You’ve known me since I was a little girl, Savior. How in the hell was I supposed to know you didn’t recognize me? You never asked for my name so I assumed it was because you knew it.”

In hindsight, I should have realized that between the Reckless Bitches, his biker swagger and handsome face that he probably fucked plenty of nameless women. “Anyway, that’s why I came here, to give you Ammo’s jacket. Nothing more.”

“Kutte,” he said, correcting me on the leather jacket.

“Whatever. Have a nice life.” I yanked the door open and hooked a left until I heard the noise of the group we passed on our way to the room with more privacy.

“Mandy, wait!”

I froze and turned, waiting for him to say more. “If you, ah, need anything —”

“I don’t. I’m fine on my own.” I didn’t need or want the Reckless Bastards’ help in general, or his help specifically.

“Ammo would want —”

I cut him off. “Ammo is dead, Savior. Whatever loyalty you had to him, doesn’t extend to me. Goodbye.”

I soaked in his rugged handsomeness for several long seconds before forcing my gaze and my feet to move away from the tall, imposing figure he cut. Savior was nice to look at and even better in bed but he’d made his feelings about fucking me very clear. The further I got away from him and the clubhouse, the more my heart rate would settle and the calmer I’d feel.

Knowing what was waiting for me at my shoebox apartment, nothing but mindless entertainment, I decided to take a trip to the cemetery. Visit the only people in the world who had ever truly cared about me. At least they were all together now, and as I sat on the prickly grass in front of the three headstones, I knew they were the reason I’d come back to Vegas. I thought there was nothing for me here, but it turns out everything that mattered to me was right here.

Which meant I wasn’t going anywhere. Not anytime soon, anyway.