Chapter 22

Cassie

There were no two ways about it. My heart was utterly and totally broken. I had never in my life had someone talk to me that way, much less degrade me in such a manner. I really thought Scott cared about me, that he truly had feelings for me, but from what he said, he was no different than Carl or anyone else. That Thursday morning, I got up before my father and headed over to Whitney’s place. Her parents were gone on vacation, and she knew I’d had a rough night the evening before. I had been so distraught that I’d just told her I would come over in the morning and talk to her about it. When I got there, she was waiting at the door, smiling and holding her arms out.

“God,” I said, laying my head on her shoulder. “My life has taken a serious turn.”

“You wouldn’t be my best friend if you didn’t have something exciting going on in your life,” she said and chuckled, rubbing my back. “Come on in. There are donuts, coffee, and if you really prefer, we can break out the ice cream.”

“At seven in the morning?” I sniffled, lifting my head and walking inside.

“Hey, there are no time restrictions on a broken heart,” she replied.

I sat down at the table and just stared at my plate, my mind moving in slow motion. I had cried so much the night before that my head was pounding and my eyes were swollen. Whitney poured me a glass of orange juice and cup of coffee and sat down across the table from me. I reached over and grabbed a chocolate donut and pulled at it, putting small pieces in my mouth.

“So, tell me what happened,” she said. “You got to his place. You were going to tell him, and then what? You were crying so hard I couldn’t understand you last night.”

“I got there and he turned into a monster,” I said, “a complete and total asshole. He told me it was my fault for ruining his life and he never cared about me. He just wanted to fuck the boss’s daughter. From there we just argued until I finally left without telling him about the baby.”

“What a dick,” Whitney said, shaking her head. “He really did seem like such a nice guy when I met him.”

“To me too,” I said. “That’s what I don’t understand. He isn’t even like that with the other guys. In fact, he always got picked on at work for being the guy who didn’t jump into their vulgar conversations. He and Carl, the creepy guy from work, the one who told my father, they wanted to kill each other because Scott hated the kind of man he was. I don’t understand where yesterday came from.”

“Maybe he is hurt,” Whitney said. “Maybe he didn’t mean those things but was lashing out. I mean, the guy did get fired from a job he had been at for over a decade.”

“That doesn’t mean he had to say such horrible things to me,” I said, starting to cry again. “I was there to tell him he was going to be a father for God’s sake.”

“You’re right. He shouldn’t have said those things, even if he didn’t know about the baby,” Whitney replied. “Guys are weird like that, you know? They finally find themselves in a place where they are happy and in love, and then if it doesn’t work out, they turn into these vile beasts that will take your weaknesses and exploit them just to hurt you.”

“I wasn’t the nicest person back to him,” I said. “I couldn’t help myself. The things he was saying were terrible. That crossed with the hormones flowing through my body. I’m surprised I didn’t breathe fire and set him ablaze.”

Whitney chuckled. “I’m picturing that right now. I can totally see that happening with you.”

“But now he won’t ever talk to me again,” I said, starting to cry all over again.

“Hey, hey,” Whitney said, coming over to my side and sitting down next to me. “Everything is going to be okay. We are going to figure all of this out, okay? You are not alone in this, and you don’t need some dickhead who is treating you like shit to be there for you. It is his loss in this situation, completely and totally his loss.”

“But he is the father,” I sobbed. “I can’t keep the baby from him. What will I say when my child asks about his father?”

“I don’t know,” Whitney said, hugging me tightly. “But we can deal with that when the time comes.”

“I don’t know what the next steps are,” I said, wiping my eyes on my sleeve. “This is something I never expected to happen. Where do I even go from here?”

“We will figure that out together,” Whitney said, handing me a tissue. “This isn’t the end of the world, Cassie. Women, single women, have babies every day. They raise babies every day without the help of a man in their life. You have one thing that so many don’t, and that is support. Regardless of how your family feels about what happened, they will help you support that child. That is one stress you don’t have to think about. The rest of it we can take step by step.”

“God,” I said, leaning my head back. “Why is it always me?”

Whitney laughed. “What are you talking about? You never have drama like this. You are the responsible girl who does what you are told.”

“And this is what happens when I stray out into the real world.” I groaned. “Maybe my father is right. Maybe I should herd along with the other sheep, letting him make my decisions. It looks like when I get the chance, the first thing I do is go completely nuts and end up single and pregnant.”

“I won’t lie,” Whitney said, chuckling. “When you do something, you go for the gold. That’s for damn sure. You leave no stone unturned and you bring back the entire prize.”

“Prize.” I scoffed. “My prize is a living, breathing human being I am supposed to keep alive and well. I can’t even make choices for myself without royally screwing it up somehow. This poor child is going to be doomed.”

“No.” Whitney hugged me again. “You are the sweetest and kindest woman I have ever met. You have a heart of gold, and you always want to help others. You are going to be an amazing mother to this baby. There is no doubt in my mind that once this all settles in and you learn to accept it, you will blossom into a woman who was made to be a mom. Trust me, you don’t give yourself enough credit, so I will tell you every single chance I get how awesome you are.”

“When I started the summer, do you know what I did?” I asked.

“What?”

“I sat in my dorm on that last day before the driver came to pick me up to take me to the airport, and I made a list of all my future goals,” I said. “And on that list was a family. A couple of kids, a husband, a dog named Spot, the whole nine yards. Never in there did I write that I wanted to be a single mom, that I wanted a man who didn’t want me. I had my plan, Whitney. It was written in stone, and I’m sure it was written the day my mother told my father she was pregnant with me.”

“Yeah, well, we all have plans like that. That’s part of being young and a dreamer,” she said. “But life is funny that way. It doesn’t give a rat’s ass about your plans. It does what it wants.”

“Why in the world did it want me to think I was so in love and then have the guy turn out to be a complete and total asshole?”

“I don’t know,” Whitney said, “but there are a million other girls out there asking the same question because, let’s face it, guys are all fucking assholes. I mean look at our dads. They’re assholes. Where in our childhood did we decide to completely ignore that fact and think there were actually good guys out there? I blame our mothers, and those damn Disney movies. Happily ever after my ass.”

I giggled. “I’m sure there is someone out there who would think your ass was a happily ever after.”

“Not that I appreciate the reference, but at this point I am just happy to see a smile out of you,” she said. “And plenty of men out there think this ass is all they need, but they can’t have it.”

“I need to be that way,” I said, sitting up straight. “Fuck men.”

“That’s right,” Whitney said.

“And screw them for thinking they run the world,” I said.

“Amen,” she said.

“I don’t need a man in my life to be a good mother. I can do this all on my own,” I said.

“Mmhm.”

“But I forgot one little thing,” I said, sinking back into my chair. “Actually, two things now that I think about it.”

“What’s that?”

“The fact that I love Scott, and then there’s the whole thing where eventually I will have to tell my father.” I grimaced.

“Eek,” Whitney said. “I do not envy you on the father part. Your dad is crazy protective of you.”

“What if I just don’t tell him?” I said. “I go to school, don’t come back for Christmas, and when I do come back, I have the baby in my arms. He won’t be able to turn us away, right?”

“Your father has a team of security just to make sure you are okay at school. I think that might come up when they give their reports,” Whitney said. “I can see it now. They are briefing your father on how you are doing and include the fact that the baby is growing well. He might die right then and there.”

“Oh, my God.” I laughed. “He might. There is a good likelihood of that happening. Do they make cards for this?” I asked, groaning. “Surprise, Dad! I got knocked up in a club closet. See you at Thanksgiving!”

“No, but I am seeing a serious future in the greeting card business for you,” she said. “I bet you would sell out so fast. Your motto could be something like, ‘Ruining families since 2018.’”

“Will you tell him?”

“Hell no,” she said. “I like my head on my shoulders.”

“Ugh,” I said, rubbing my face.

“Listen, sweetie,” she said, taking my hand. “This is not the end of the world, I promise you. Your father loves you, and though he may freak out at first and say some rough things, he will never kick you out of his life. In the end, he will learn to accept it because he has to. He is not going to have any choice in the matter.”

“I know,” I said. “And Scott?”

“Well, Scott is going to be his own person, and I think if you can tell him, that is great. Put the ball in his court,” she said. “But if you can’t, then you have that right too. It’s tough. I know it. But you are a strong girl, and you are going to make it through this. In the end, you are going to realize it was never as bad as you thought.”

“Thank you, Whitney,” I said, leaning on her shoulder. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”