Chapter 54

Animal

When I was in the parking lot of our burned out mall, I took my guard down. I let my heart bleed all over itself. Missing T became a symptom of the disease I was slowly dying from.

To have had love and lost it, all at once. I would never love another. I took her vow. I only love once, and she was it.

Lately, I started drinking. I would sleep here in the purple Hummer. Nix and Becca would kill me if they knew that I was out in the open like this and that I did it regularly. It was a predictable pattern.

It was a fairly nice night, so I stumbled out of the Hummer. All the wrong moves, for all the worst reasons.

I found the cement divider that she and I had used as a platform to look at the stars on. It was crumbling, but it was still here. Like me.

I sat on it and stretched out as best I could. I had been a skinny tall thing back then. I dropped the bottle of Jack and was surprised when it rolled instead of breaking.

Usually, I spoke to her in the Hummer. My special angel. I wasn’t sure where she was actually. If there was a hereafter. Maybe hell. She’d killed a lot of people. Which was okay, because we’d be there together someday.

I reached my hand backwards to where she was so long ago. I hadn’t come to appreciate her sacrifice. I was still angry. It was supposed to be me. I was the savior. I was the protector. I was Animal.

I fell asleep like that.

Hours later, I woke up alive. Another half-assed attempt at being with her had failed. At least I was sober enough to drive now. It was dark when I let myself back into my bedroom.

I looked into the mirror on my door when I closed it.

She was there.

T.

She was wearing jeans and a white hoodie, no makeup and a huge smile. Such a weird combination for me to put in my head. Like, maybe I would picture her in a wedding gown or something more special. I’d dreamed of her, but I felt as awake as shit.

I had to try talking to her. I was desperate.

“T?”

I couldn’t believe my eyes. Her laughter hit me next. It was soul-cleansing.

“T?”

I spun to see if the reflection could possibly be true.

I grabbed her hand.

It was obviously a hard hallucination, or I had drunk myself to death in the Hummer.

T patted my hand again. “It’s me. I’m here.”

“What the fuck?” I touched her hand with both of mine and fell to my knees. I reached out and pulled her to me. This dream was so real I had to be dead. There were no other options.

I hugged her middle, resting my head between her breasts.

Her stomach gurgled. I tipped my head back so I could look at her. Her brown eyes were sparkling.

“I’m here. I was captive. All this time. I got out a few days ago. I didn’t want them to track me here.”

She was saying reasonable things.

“I saw you die. On the video, I saw you die.”

Her laughter turned to sadness.

“Oh, Animal. I almost died. They kept me alive because they’re evil, but very good at what they do. I’m here. With you. I came back.” T opened her arms.

My T, who didn’t like touches too much, helped me as I staggered as I stood. “Whoa, there we go, big guy. How are you doing there?”

I hugged her for real. Encircling her in my arms as my heart rejoiced. I felt the unrealness seeping away. She was here. This was life, and this was T. I made sure to look her in the eyes.

“I love you.” My throat dried up as I watched her hear it.

The familiar pain was just behind her eyes. “I know. We’re family.”

“No. I love you. I want to make a family with you. We’re not related. You’re my wife.”

She rubbed my arms. “Let’s hug it out, okay? Have you been drinking? And you’re never drinking.”

“You’re not getting it.”

She hushed me with a pat on my chest.

Finally, I was able to get enough of my equilibrium underneath me to spin her and press her against the door.

“I love you. I have been dying for you since I watched you die. I can’t take a breath without missing you. Not as a friend. Not as family. As my partner. As my woman.”

I brushed her hair out of her face. What had she been through? Was she really here? I pushed her white hoodie off of her. She allowed it.

I took the hem of the shirt she had on underneath and lifted it up. I saw a gunshot wound on her stomach. I pulled it all the way off of her and held her shirt in my hand. With the other, I used my fingertips to scan her body. At least five gunshots.

Healed and well-treated, obviously.

“T?”

She shivered and I put her shirt back on her. I was clumsy about it, but she helped. Then I helped her put her hoodie back on.

“I don’t understand. Tell me how to understand this.”

T hesitated a few times, and then she put her hands on my face. “I came back. To you. For you. I love once. I love you.”

I wanted to show her my tattoo on my back. I wanted to hug her so tight to my chest that I could feel her heartbeat. I needed to call Nix and Becca and Ember.

But there was only one thing I had to do.

I leaned down slowly, because our first kiss had been one of the worst nights of my life so many years ago when she left as a kid. And if this was all real, if my T was back, then this was the best night.

I came in very slowly. I kissed her forehead, then the tip of her nose. I’d never felt anything like putting my lips on hers.

Galaxies collided, souls rejoiced, and in the smallest part of me and the smallest part of her, two teenage kids clung to each other, wondering what the hell had taken us so long.

“My wife,” I told her with sureness.

I watched as her eyes filled with tears. There was almost a fight in her.

She pointed to my chest. “I knew that. I was just waiting for you to figure it out. I guess all I had to do was die.”

She was making light of it, but I wouldn’t allow it. “Wait. Don’t leave.”

I went to step away from her and then thought better of it. I grabbed her hand and tugged her to the center of my room.

“What are you doing?”

She was admonishing me, but I heard the happiness in her voice. I took my silver tiger ring off my hand. It was too big and manly, but I wasn’t wasting time. Not a second.

“T.” I was very sober all of a sudden, though I knew I’d have to convince her of it again and again. I took to my knee. “I call you my wife all the time. Please, can I be your husband?”

I held out my ring for her hand.

She shook her head over and over. “What? This is… You’re out of your mind right now. What about all the ladies?”

I had been wrong before about thinking I needed other women. When T told me that she loved me, I slept with others. I slept with her enemy. It was her all this time.

“There’s been no one. I was never going to touch anyone else for the rest of my life.” T looked at me like I had spoken a different language. “I get it. You’re going to have to process this, and I’m going to have to earn you. You can say no. Actually, you deserve to say no. And if you do, that’s fine. I’ll live in your house, and you can take others if you want. And I will wait, forever if I have to.”

She took the ring out of my hand and twirled it in hers.

She amazed me. The beauty in her thick hair, her deep brown eyes. Seeing her moving was my dearest wish. She was here, a miracle.

She grabbed my hand and slid my ring back on. I wasn’t even disappointed. I would be hers. The king to her queen. I owed her Nix’s life and mine.

“I don’t want this ring.”

I nodded. “That’s okay.”

“I don’t need a ring.” She made sure it fit back on my ring finger.

“Whatever you say.” T twisted it so the tiger was facing the right way.

And then the hair in front of her face again, the closed door.

“I already told you. I love once. But I’ll take you as a husband, too.”

My eyes were wide. “What? Is that a yes?”

She nodded and smiled. God, she was gorgeous. She was everything.

I stood up and bundled her in a hug.

“You’re my T.”

T let me kiss her and even returned it. I was immediately revved up. “I love you.”

“And I love you.”

“Okay, let’s go. We have some really, really good news to share with our people.” I opened the door to my room. I kissed her four more times in the hallway before I let her come downstairs with me.

“We have so much to talk about.” She reached over and patted my hand.

I pulled out my phone and texted Nix to meet me in the living room. The reply came immediately. It was time for some more reunions.