---

I didn’t tell Dominic that Alison’s been staying with me; I want to speak to her first, to give her a chance to explain herself. I’m sure she will have prepared for every eventuality, but everyone deserves a chance to defend themselves. That’s something Zach never had. Despite this, now I know how disturbed she is, it scares me to think her lies are symptomatic of something dangerous.

But when I get home, prepared for a difficult conversation, prepared for anything to happen, the house is empty. I call Alison’s name but only silence follows my words. I do a quick search of each room and am not too concerned; it’s possible she needed to get out of the house for some fresh air. But then I notice her bags are missing from the spare room. In fact, everything she brought with her has gone and the bed is neatly made, as if she was never here.

Panic begins to consume me; Alison was dangerous enough in my house – I know that now – but missing, she is even more of a risk. To me, to Dominic, maybe even to herself.

Even though I know she won’t answer, I try her mobile, leaving a message when her voicemail kicks in. ‘Alison, please call me. Whatever’s happened, we can talk about this. I’m on your side, just call me.’

Next, I try Will, relieved to hear his voice when he answers. ‘Is there any chance you’ve seen or heard from Alison?’

‘Um, no. Why? What’s happened?’

‘I went out this morning and when I got back just now she was gone. I mean, all her things have gone. Everything.’

‘Well, that’s a good thing, isn’t it? I was getting worried she’d never leave.’

‘No, it’s not a good thing. She’s… very unstable. More than I thought.’ But I can’t expect Will to understand this.

‘What exactly does that mean? Has she done something?’

I tell him I don’t have time to explain it right now but promise I will as soon as I can.

But, of course, he won’t let it go so easily. ‘Are you sure she hasn’t just moved out? You said she’d found a place.’

‘She has, but it’s not ready until Thursday. And she would have said goodbye if that were the case.’

‘I don’t like this, Mia. I’m coming over. I’ve got a meeting in half an hour but I’ll cancel it.’

‘There’s no need. I’m fine. She’s not here, is she?’

‘No, but I think you’ve got a lot to tell me, haven’t you?’

---

It’s funny how things can suddenly take a sharp turn. How carefully laid plans and ideas can quickly go awry when you’re thrown a curveball. Although I always intended to eventually be honest with Will about Alison, it wasn’t supposed to be like this. But he needs to know and I won’t keep it from him any longer.

We’re sitting outside in the garden, but the pleasant heat and bright sunlight do nothing to make what I have to tell him any easier.

‘I don’t understand,’ he says, once I’ve explained everything. His confusion is no surprise when it is only now that I’m starting to get any idea about who Alison really is myself. ‘Are you saying you think she killed Josie? That it wasn’t Zach after all?’

Now that the words are out there and no longer just in my head, they seem to make even more sense. ‘I don’t know for sure, Will, but I really think so.’

‘But why would she come to you for help then? Why would she insist Zach is innocent?’

This is the question that’s been plaguing me. ‘I think that was just to get my attention. There’s no way I would have listened to her otherwise. But she’s really disturbed, Will. Maybe she’s so out of touch with reality that she doesn’t even remember doing anything. It’s possible that she might actually believe Dominic is guilty.’

Will is silent for such a long time that I can almost hear his brain ticking. Calculating. Trying to make sense of what seems impossible. ‘And you believe this Dominic? Are you sure he can be trusted? What if he’s the one lying about Alison?’

I tell him that I wasn’t sure to start with, but after speaking to Alison’s parents and checking Dominic’s computer, I’m now convinced he hasn’t hurt her.

‘Okay, well, we need to go to the police. They’ll find Alison and hopefully get the truth out of her. There’s no other way to know, is there? Even if she walked through that door now I doubt she’d tell you what really happened.’ His sigh comes out as a whistle. ‘I knew there was something not right here, I just knew. I wish you’d told me before.’

‘But do you see why I couldn’t? I don’t turn my back on people, Will. I was only trying to help her. And find out the truth about Zach. I thought I knew it all, but then Alison turns up and it’s like a bomb’s exploded.’

He reaches across the table to take my hand. ‘Whatever the truth is with Zach, it doesn’t change anything in your life now. You’ve still got Freya, and you’ve still got me. Knowing about what Zach did never affected my feelings towards you. It had nothing to do with you. And if he’s innocent, well, then I’m happy for you and Freya. And I’ll still be here.’

I squeeze his hand because I’m too choked up to speak.

‘It still doesn’t make sense that she’s made up all these lies about her partner. She must have known you could have checked it out.’

‘The only way I can explain that is with how advanced her mental illness must be. Her bruises looked real, Will. What more evidence would I need? But now I think about it, they could have been carefully applied make-up. I was too shocked to stare at them and turned away pretty quickly.’

‘Come on,’ he says, ‘the sooner we go to the police the better.’

‘I need to get Freya first, Will. I can’t be away from her when I don’t know why Alison is so fixated on me, and we could be ages at the police station.’

He stares towards the back of the garden for a moment.

‘Tell you what. I’ll pick Freya up. You need to do this and I don’t think it should wait.’

---

‘Mummy! I thought I wasn’t coming home yet,’ Freya says, rushing through the door and into my arms.

I scoop her up and breathe in the smell of her shampoo. She is safe. We’re all here together, and everything will be fine. ‘Well, I missed you so much I asked Will to bring you home.’

‘I’m glad,’ she says. ‘But I think Grandma and Grandad were a bit sad.’

I tell her we’ll go and see them again soon and, appeased by this news, Freya rushes off to play in the garden.

As soon as she’s out of earshot, Will asks me what happened with the police.

‘They assured me they’re taking it seriously and that they’re look into everything, but I could tell the officer I spoke to wasn’t too convinced.’

‘I suppose they need to be careful until they’ve got evidence,’ Will says. ‘Just try to put it out of your mind. She could have done anything while she was here but she’s gone now and I really don’t think she’ll come back. Maybe she found out you’d gone to see Dominic and got spooked. That could be why she disappeared.’

I hope he’s right. After five years, I need this to end now.

‘Don’t worry, Mia. And don’t let it play on your mind. The police are looking for her now. You did everything you could to help her but if she won’t help herself then there’s nothing more you could have done.’

So for the second time in my life, I will try to block out everything that’s happened and focus on what’s important, the family I have right in front of me. It works for a while, but when I go to bed and close my eyes, it’s Alison’s face I see. Will fell asleep on the sofa a couple of hours ago and I didn’t want to wake him so I left him to rest, but now I wish he was here. With everything else I had to explain to him, I forgot to tell him about Alison watching us that night, but now I wish I had, because she was there for a reason. She was there for me.

My phone starts to vibrate on the bedside table and I know without looking that it’s her, as if my thoughts have summoned her.

I don’t say anything but listen to her speak. ‘I know you’re there, Mia. We need to talk and there’s no one else I can turn to. Will you meet me?’

Every bone in my body screams out no, but somehow my words say the opposite. ‘Where?’

‘South Ealing station.’

‘Alison, you should know I’ve been to the police. You need help.’

She ignores what this means. ‘I thought you were helping me?’

‘I was… I am. But you’ve got to start telling the truth. You do realise you won’t get better unless you do this?’

There’s a long pause before she answers. ‘I know. But just come – alone, please. Don’t tell them where I’ll be. They’ll find me eventually, won’t they? I just want to talk to you first.’

When I don’t answer she makes another attempt to convince me. ‘You’ll never know what happened with Zach and Josie otherwise, will you? Because I won’t tell the police and they can’t make me talk. Whatever they do, they can’t make me talk.’

Alison is disturbed enough to mean this, so I have little choice. I tell her I’ll be there in ten minutes. Before I leave, I check on Freya and Will, watching them both for a few minutes, peaceful in their sleep. I try to tell myself I’m not doing this because I’m worried something will happen to me, that I’m soaking up their images to give me more courage.

‘I’m sorry,’ I whisper into the air. ‘But I need answers. I need to know, for Zach’s sake.’

---

Alison is already at the station when I head towards it. I didn’t want to wake Will by starting the car so I’ve walked here. She’s wearing a denim jacket, black leggings and bright white trainers that seem to glow in the dark. Her hair looks freshly washed, and I wonder where she’s been staying.

It’s past midnight now so the station is closed, but I’m relieved to see a group of young men across the road, perched on a wall with beers in their hands.

I don’t bother with pleasantries when I reach her. This woman has lied to me from the second I met her. ‘Start talking, Alison. What’s this all about?’

But she shakes her head. ‘Not here. I need to show you something.’

I take a step back. ‘There’s no way I’m going anywhere. We can talk right here or not at all.’

‘It’s not far from here, I promise. If you don’t want to come then that’s your choice. But like I said, I won’t be talking to the police. Though what does that matter? You’ve spent this long not really knowing the truth, so I suppose it makes no difference.’ She turns to walk away.

My mind is in turmoil and I grip my phone in my pocket. I should call the police now, it’s the safest thing to do. But then I will never know, because I don’t doubt that Alison will take this to the grave with her if I don’t give in to her request.

But before I can even make a decision, my feet are moving forward and I am following Alison Cummings, or Alison Frances, or whatever her name is, into a deserted street. The whole time I follow her she doesn’t turn around, but she knows I’m behind her. My shoes are flat but click against the pavement, the sound echoing into the night.

After a few more roads I know where she’s going. She’s taking me to the flat she used to share with Josie Carpenter. The flat where Zach died. The shortness of breath comes quickly, forcing me to stop and double over.

‘Are you okay?’ she asks. ‘I guess you know where we are, then.’ She takes hold of my arm and eases me up. ‘You’ll be okay. But we need to go inside.’

‘I… I can’t go in there.’

‘Yes, you can. You want answers, don’t you?’ Her voice is strangely gentle and soothing, as if she is the therapist and I the patient. But I can’t be fooled by her again. She has wanted to get me here all along.

‘No,’ I say again, but she’s leading me forward. Gently, but also determined and forceful.

‘How can we even get in there? Who lives there now?’

She pulls out a set of keys from her pocket. ‘Nobody. Do you believe in coincidences, Alison? Because I never used to. But when you were helping me look for flats I found this one available to rent. You wouldn’t have noticed it because it was two bedrooms and in Ealing, but I couldn’t believe it when I saw the listing. So I had to rent it. It’s as if it was meant to be.’

Again, I am lost for words, lost for a solution to this problem. If I go in there I am putting myself at risk, but if I don’t then I will never have the answers I need.

‘Are you coming then?’ she asks, already heading up the narrow path to the front door.

Trying to suppress the panic bubbling inside me, I follow her and step into the flat where Zach died.

The first thing I notice is the musty smell. It’s been masked with some air freshener but it’s still there, underneath, like a reminder of what happened here.

A ghost that won’t go away.

‘Just ignore the smell,’ Alison says. ‘The landlady’s found it hard to rent this place in the last five years so it’s been empty most of the time. She couldn’t believe her luck when I said I’d take it. So, anyway, it’s mine for six months at least. More if I want it.’

‘But why would you want to stay here, Alison? It’s not… it’s not good for you.’

‘Probably harder for you than it is for me,’ she says. ‘I didn’t lose someone I loved in here.’ Her words send a shiver up my spine. I shouldn’t have come in; I need to get out before it’s too late.

‘Come and sit down,’ she says. ‘The living room’s just here.’ She points to a closed door and once again I follow her.

The room is a surprise. It looks freshly decorated and the furniture appears to be brand new.

‘D’you like it?’ Alison says. ‘I thought I’d make an effort. Cost me a lot of money to do up, but it’s worth it. And the landlady said I could do whatever I want in here.’

‘Why have you done this? What’s it all for, Alison?’

She sits on the sofa and crosses her legs. ‘That’s a funny question to ask, when there must be so many other things you want to know. But I’ll answer. This is my home now – of course I want it to look nice. You should have seen it before. It was a typical student place, cheap carpets and boring magnolia walls. But I suppose neither of us cared. It was never meant to be forever.’ She stares at me and her eyes feel like lasers cutting through me. ‘Although, I suppose for Josie it was forever, wasn’t it? Her forever.’

Staying where I am in the doorway, I try not to let fear show in my voice. I need to keep calm and not do anything to set Alison off. If I can do this right, there’s a good chance I will make it out of here safely.

‘Alison, I really want to help you, so I think you should tell me what happened to Josie. What exactly did you do to her?’