Chapter 22

Evelyn

We’re lying in bed after the hot fucking sex we’ve had. Just as we’re staring at the ceiling and relaxing, I hear Shawn mumble, “I llmomble moyu.”

I glance over at him. “What did you say?” I ask.

I am pretty sure I know what I heard, but I want to hear it again. It’s been a long time since I’ve heard him say it to me. Way too fucking long. And, of course, I could be wrong, but I need him to say it so I understand.

He doesn’t answer me. I peer over at him, and those green eyes of his are closed. Shit.

I hear his breathing. He sounds so relaxed.

I’m not sure I can be that relaxed just yet. I don’t even think about waking him at this point. I prop myself up on my right elbow. I only want to stare at his sexy body. Shit, how I’ve missed that.

I run my fingers through his thick blonde head of hair. I’ve always loved his hair. I use my index finger to trace around the right side of his round face.

I trace around his pointed chin. I feel some stubble from where he hasn’t shaved today, and I don’t mind the roughness.

I move my finger on down to his chest and draw a circle around his left nipple. It gets hard just like my own would, if he was touching me. I draw another circle, and rub his entire chest with my whole hand a couple of more times.

Fuck. I must have worn him out with the hot sex. He doesn’t move, not one inch. My touching doesn’t even disturb his sleep.

I return to using just my index finger and trace a line from between his rib cage stopping before I reach his stomach. The muscles in his abdomen are so tight. Shawn has kept himself in shape while he’s been gone all this time.

My finger keeps moving down his body as it runs down his large cock. My touch brings it to life again.

I glance at Shawn’s face. Still nothing. How in the hell does a man sleep through this?

I want to grab his huge cock, but I resist. For now.

Sliding my own body down the bed a bit, I run my finger down his hairy left leg, and like his upper body, it’s muscular. This man has no fucking fat on him anywhere.

I’m a bit envious of him. Six years later, and I still have a tad bit of weight left from giving birth to Tanner. Other women would disagree with me on that, but they’ve never seen me naked.

I end the tracing of Shawn’s body at his big toe. I could mess with his feet all night, and it wouldn’t bother him. He doesn’t have a ticklish spot on him, not even his feet.

At the end of the bed, I sit and take in the gorgeous naked body lying there. Shit, he’s so sexy. I want to kiss every inch of him.

I move back to his face and start with his forehead, where I notice a small scar on the right side. It’s about an inch-long gash.

Maybe from where he got hit by something or someone? I have no damn clue because he hasn’t mentioned much about what happened.

I kiss down his nose to his lips. But again, I get no reaction. Not even a return kiss.

I kiss his neck, sucking on two or three spots, hoping I don’t leave any marks. I’m not sure he’d care if I did. Besides, it’s what he gets for not waking up.

I move on to that muscular chest of his. I leave kisses all over the middle of his chest. I can’t leave out his nipples, so I kiss each one of them.

The right one hardens just as the left one.

As I look at his left nipple again, I see a newer scar on his left shoulder, just below his collarbone. I have no idea where it’s from.

I continue leaving kisses all down to his stomach. I stop for a minute, and notice the long scar on the lower right side.

As a kid, Shawn had had his appendix taken out when it had burst. I remember him telling me the story of how he was outside playing on a summer day with his friends. He had fallen to the ground in pain. His parents had taken him to the hospital where the doctor operated on it within a few hours.

I put kisses over that long skinny scar as if they will make the scar disappear.

There’s his cock standing up, like it’s saying it wants kisses, too. I hesitate for a split second and kiss it on the rounded end. I can’t leave it out after all. It wants to be loved, too.

My kisses continue down his right leg this time. Hairy and all. Shawn has another new scar on his upper thigh. This scar is longer and wider than any other one on his body. What in the hell happened to him while he was deployed?

As I’m kissing this scar, I notice one on his right hand. I grab it with my left hand and lightly touch my lips to it. I gently put his hand back on the bed and move on down his lower leg to his right foot. I kiss his big toe and sit up at the end of the bed once again.

I take in as much of this sexy man as I can. I don’t know if I can ever get enough of him. The kisses didn’t get rid of the scars on Shawn’s body, so I want to lick them off.

I use my tongue to taste the big toe on his left foot, as I use my tongue and make my way back to the top of his body. I lick his lower left shin and move back to the upper thigh on his right leg. I use my tongue to taste the scar. It still doesn’t disappear. Damn it.

Out of the corner of my eye, I catch his cock dancing, like it’s taunting me. Daring me to lick it. I don’t give it a second thought and move, so that I’m looking right at it. I use my tongue, and slow its dancing by giving it a good lick on the bottom side. It stops for a minute, and I move on up Shawn’s body to his stomach.

My tongue finds the remains of his appendix surgery. The scar has faded some in the last few years compared to the new ones he has.

I continue my journey back up his chest. I lick his nipples and make them harder than they were, if that’s possible.

My tongue finds the shoulder scar and runs over it.

I lick up the side of his neck to his jawline.

Shawn’s lips stick out as though they’re lonely. I kiss his pouty lips. I sure have missed them as much as the rest of him.

I run my tongue from his jawline on the left side of his face up the side of his head to his forehead. My tongue finds the scar there easily.

I prop myself up on my elbow and look at Shawn as he continues sleeping. Not a clue what I’ve just done to him.

I touch the new scars I can reach once more. The one on his forehead. His shoulder. His thigh.

I wish I knew what had happened to him during the time he’s been gone. I want to know where the scars came from. They are what make him the person he is. Shit, I know I can’t erase them with my tongue. And I sure as hell know I can’t erase what happened to him or give him back the lost time.

But kissing, licking, and touching him sure was worth a try. And I got some pleasure out of it at the same time.

Or did I?

Am I making the right decision here? He was my husband. Or should I say he is my husband.

What in the hell is he to me?

All I know is I feel so right when I’m with Shawn. Things are the way I want them to be. We fit together like a cock fits into a pussy.

Shawn has a caring heart.

He wants to do things with me. Look at what he did for the cake tasting. Or the baseball playing he did with our son. James didn’t want to do any of that.

He can’t give me what I want like that. He hasn’t wanted to help me with the wedding plans. He rarely wants to do anything with Tanner.

He gives me this “I’m busy” excuse all the fucking time, and I’m so sick and tired of hearing it.

For once, why can’t I be a priority? With Shawn, I am. How can I fucking walk away from that?

I sit up and lean over to kiss Shawn’s neck one more time before I try to fall asleep myself.

Shit, what’s happening?

Two hands wrap themselves around my neck. I feel my air being cut off. I try to scream and wake Shawn up, but I can’t. My air is being cut off and I’m struggling to breathe.

Holy shit.

The room is going out of focus, and I fear for my life.