Hi, Michelle, do you have some time to come chat with me?” Porsha asked.
“Uh, do you know how long it’ll take? I have a report that I need to finish by this afternoon.”
“Not more than twenty minutes or so.”
“Sure, I’ll be right in.”
Porsha set her phone on its base, wondering why Michelle sounded a little strange. But maybe Raven had her working on something important.
Michelle knocked, walked inside, and sat down.
Porsha smiled. “I really appreciate your taking the time to sit with me.”
“No problem,” she said with no feeling in her voice.
“Are you okay?” Porsha asked.
“I’m fine.”
“Are you sure? Because you seem a little preoccupied.”
“Just busy is all. But what can I do for you?”
“Well, as you heard at our staff meeting yesterday morning, I’m starting a new women’s ministry.”
Michelle nodded.
“And what that also means is that I’ll be giving you a few more assignments than usual. I’ll need you to research a number of items, too, and as we move along over the next couple of months, I’ll want to plan outings for the women. I’ll, of course, need you to assist me with that as well.”
Michelle barely blinked and acted as though she didn’t want to be there. “Okay.”
“I’ve already decided on the name of the ministry, too, which is Daughters of Ruth. But over these next few days, I’m going to begin working on multiple documents. For each monthly meeting, I’ll need you to create a formal handout that will include helpful information for single women. For the second meeting, I want to give them something that lists the top reasons women who want to be married are still single. I’ll also want to give them something that talks about the best places to meet really decent guys. But for the first meeting, the handouts will be more intro related.”
Michelle looked at her but still didn’t say anything. This was so unlike her, and even though she claimed nothing was wrong, Porsha knew something was.
“Okay, look, Michelle. If this isn’t a good time, please tell me. If you’re having a bad day, you know I’ll understand.”
“No, I’m good.”
Porsha wondered why she was lying but didn’t call her out on it. “That’s pretty much all I have, anyway, so unless you have questions I guess that’s it.”
“When are you planning to have your first meeting and on what day of the week?” she finally asked.
“Every fourth Thursday,” Porsha said, flipping through the calendar on her desk. “So I’d really like to start two weeks from now.”
“You don’t think that’s too soon?”
“No. Today is only Wednesday, and I plan to work on this every single day through Saturday. Then, this coming Sunday, I’ll be personally announcing it to the congregation. A few days later, you can send it out to our membership mailing list, and I’ll talk about it again the next Sunday. After that, you can send out another mass e-blast two days before the meeting.”
“I’ll do my best,” Michelle said. “Raven has a few things she needs me to work on as well, but I’ll be fine.”
Raven always had projects for Michelle to work on, and even when Porsha did sometimes add a few responsibilities to Michelle’s workload, she never complained or made excuses. Today, however, she sounded as though she was hoping Porsha would say, Oh, well, that’s okay. I’ll handle my own research and administrative needs, and you just focus on Raven’s.
“Again, I really appreciate you taking the time to sit down with me and for all your help.”
Michelle stood up. “No problem. Just send me what you need me to do, and I’ll get it done.”
“Sounds good, and thank you.”
When Michelle left and closed the door, Porsha lowered her eyebrows. Something was very wrong, and Porsha knew she wasn’t just imagining things. Michelle was distant, and the more Porsha thought about it, she seemed cold, even. Maybe she was dealing with something personal and simply didn’t feel comfortable sharing it with Porsha. If so, Porsha hoped this was only temporary, and that tomorrow would be a much better day for her.
Porsha researched more information online regarding single women until her cell phone rang. It was Steve.
“Hey,” she said.
“Hey yourself. Are you busy?”
“Sort of, but what’s up?”
“Not a lot. Just wanted to hear your voice…and ask if you enjoyed our time together last night. You know, before things turned a little ugly.”
“It was okay.”
“Oh, so I see you’re still upset.”
“Nope.”
“Look, baby,” he said. “You know I don’t like it when we argue like this. It really bothers me. And I barely slept two hours.”
“I don’t know what to tell you.”
“Let’s let bygones be bygones. At least for now.”
Porsha flipped through a couple of documents on her desk and didn’t respond.
“So have you thought more about my suggestion?”
“Which is?”
“Going to my conference with me next month.”
“I’ll have to let you know.”
“Why? Do you have other plans?”
“Not that I’m aware of, but I’m starting a new singles ministry for women. And I’m going to be very busy with it.”
“Really? When did you decide this?”
“Just recently, but now it’s official.”
“Well, it’s not like you’re really single.”
“Excuse me?”
“You’re not.”
“Yeah…I am. I’m not married to anyone.”
“But you and I have a commitment to each other.”
“No, you have a commitment to your wife. A broken one maybe, but it’s still a commitment. I’m not committed to anyone, though.”
“But eventually you’ll be my wife, and you know that.”
Porsha felt herself becoming irritated. “Can we talk about something else?”
“I’d rather talk about this singles ministry you’re starting up. Because the next thing I know, you’ll be hanging out with some of these women, looking for men.”
“First of all, I don’t hang out anywhere. But if I do meet a nice single man, why shouldn’t I be able to date him?”
“I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that.”
“Pretend all you want.”
“What is going on with you? Why are you suddenly acting like you don’t care about us anymore?”
“I explained all of that to you last night. I just want more, Steve.”
“Hmmph, maybe. Or maybe it has more to do with whoever called you last night.”
“What are you talking about?” she said.
“Porsha, don’t do that.”
“I told you it was nobody important.”
“Then why can’t you tell me the name of this nobody?”
“Because it’s not necessary.”
“Whatever you say, baby. Look, I have to get going, but I’ll call you tomorrow before I come by.”
“Yeah, right. I won’t hold my breath.”
“I’m serious. You’ll see.”
“I’ll talk to you later, Steve.”
“I love you.”
“See ya.”
“You’re not going to say it back? I noticed you didn’t say it back yesterday, either, before we hung up.”
“Love you, too.”
“I really do love you, Porsha.”
“So do I. Talk to you later.”
Porsha laid her phone down and swiveled her chair around so that she faced her office window. She was so confused. As wrong as it was, she did love Steve. She’d loved him for months, but she was no longer comfortable with their situation. She knew that this was partly because God was dealing with her conscience—something she now realized for sure, just at this very moment—and partly because of Dillon. She had no idea why all of this was happening to her, not to mention all at one time. She’d been positive that she was over Dillon, and that the only man she loved was Steve, but she could no longer deny that she still had strong, passionate feelings for him. She cared about both of them.
Still, she was baffled by all of it, and even more so when it came to Dillon because he’d already proven that he couldn’t be trusted. Actually, Steve couldn’t be trusted, either, what with the way he was cheating on his wife with her, but at least Steve wasn’t seeing anyone else—as far as she knew, anyway.
Porsha closed her eyes, attempting to relax her mind. Her life was so not what she wanted it to be, and she wondered how she was going to fix it. But maybe the passion she had for her women’s ministry was the answer. She knew it was going to help lots of other women, and she hoped and prayed that it would help her just as much.
She needed all the help she could get—before things got worse.