Chapter 11

Amelia

I stepped to the ground and carefully brought the extension ladder down from the roof. I was finishing up a roof replacement project today. I’d hitched a ride back to town with Cade after he’d stopped by and proceeded to remind me so very thoroughly of why I’d never gotten over him. I’d called my mom to let her know I was back. My mom had been restrained with her questions for me, but I knew she had to be worried, seeing as I’d walked out on my wedding. I figured I’d have to barrel through the gossip I’d created by dumping Earl. Work gave me something to do. Aside from that, I could barely stop obsessing about Cade, so I needed something to keep me busy.

I glanced over to see Lucy Caldwell leaning against our work truck. Lucy with her blonde hair, blue eyes and curvy figure that she hid effectively in her heavy duty construction gear. Lucy was kind enough to not pester me with questions when I said I’d be meeting her at the job site today. Lucy was my sole full-time employee in the small construction company I started about five years ago. Kick A** Construction was its name—one I’d chosen as a play on the common bumper stickers in Alaska bearing the phrase Alaskan Girls Kick Ass.

I had always loved working outside and loved to build. When I was little, my very first project had been a doghouse for the family dog, Dora. It had been lopsided, and my mother and Quinn had helped right it, but it had been the most fun I’d ever had. As life rolled along, I kept taking on little projects here and there. I went to college in Anchorage, heavy in the middle of my heady love with Cade, and majored in architecture. After everything blew up with Cade, I’d been at loose ends. At the time, we’d recently moved back to Willow Brook. I’d taken a job at the Firehouse Café, a local coffee shop and restaurant, and had been casting about for what to do. Cade had been scheduled to leave for a full year of training to become a hotshot firefighter in California. We’d talked about whether I might move with him, but money had been tight at the time.

It had never occurred to me our relationship might blow apart. He’d taken that flight to California, and I’d been so damn angry, I could hardly see straight. In between shifts at the café, I started picking up odd jobs as a contractor. Before I knew it, I was doing that full-time and had to make some choices about making my business official. Kick A** Construction was formed. At first, it had been just me. My small jobs led to recommendations for bigger jobs, and I needed help. I’d known Lucy in passing then. Lucy had moved to Alaska when we were in high school, a point when my circle of friends had been pretty set. Shannon, my once upon a time friend who betrayed me so horribly, had blown that circle to smithereens.

Lucy overheard me worrying about how many jobs I could do at the café one day and offered to help. We made a kick ass team.

I gave her a wave and hooked the ladder under my arm, walking across the yard to heft it atop the truck. Without a word, Lucy reached up to help me guide it on the racks and adjust the fittings to hold it in place.

We leaned against the tailgate. I surveyed the new roof we’d installed on the small home. “Looks good.”

Lucy giggled. “Roofs don’t need to look good, although this one does if only because it’s red. Roofs are like shoes. You need them. They’re practical, but they don’t need to be pretty.”

I looked to Lucy and shook my head. “Can’t I enjoy the fact it’s pretty? I mean, the red looks nice in the trees,” I said, gesturing toward the red steel roof.

Lucy rolled her eyes. “Of course you can enjoy it. Just pointing out that it’s a roof. It needs to keep the elements out.” She glanced down at her watch and brushed a streak of dirt off her arm. “It’s only noon. Should we head over to get started at the Jacobson’s job or wait until tomorrow?”

We were scheduled to start a new house project this week. I eyed Lucy, considering her question. “Let’s start tomorrow. I’d like to take another look at the drawings and stop by Denali Builders to make sure all of our orders are lined up.”

Lucy nodded. “Sounds good. Wanna grab some lunch first?”

“Sure. Firehouse?”

At Lucy’s nod, we climbed into the truck. A short drive into downtown and I rolled into a parking spot in front of Firehouse Café. Downtown Willow Brook was picturesque, situated in a valley in the foothills of the Alaska Range with Swan Lake in view. The lake was fed from several streams rolling downhill from the distant mountains and offered a gorgeous view in all seasons. The lake was the entire reason Willow Brook was founded. It offered fresh water and fishing all summer long. The town’s convenience to Anchorage allowed residents to enjoy the benefits of living in a small, wilder area, yet the ability to run to Anchorage within a day for errands. Tourists passed through and kept local businesses quite busy from spring through autumn, yet the town retained its small feel with only a core group of year-round residents.

I climbed out of the truck and glanced around. Firehouse Café was on Main Street. It was actually housed in the town’s old fire station. It was a tall square building with the old garage turned into a seating area for dining and an open style bakery and kitchen. The fire poles were painted brightly with fireweed flowers, the finishing touches on the bright colors throughout the café with the window frames in a variety of colors and artwork hung on the walls. Square wooden tables were scattered about for seating with a counter offering additional seating where customers had a clear view into the kitchen and bakery. The bright colors livened up the long, dark winters.

No matter the season, Firehouse Café was busy. Lucy spied a table opening up in the corner and dashed across the restaurant to snag it. She grinned widely when I caught up and slipped into the chair across from her. “Hope you didn’t trip anyone else on the way to the table,” I commented with a shake of my head.

Lucy giggled and reached up to adjust her ponytail. If you overlooked her clothes—usually battered jeans and t-shirts and hardly ever feminine—you might think she was fragile. With her blonde hair, bright blue eyes and creamy complexion, she was beautiful. She had a girly giggle and was on the short side. Yet, she was as tomboy as anyone I’d ever known. She ignored her looks and didn’t do a thing to show them off. She was a damn hard worker and never flinched at getting dirty or swinging a hammer all day long. I loved working with her and felt lucky Lucy had overheard my conversation that day. Lucy had become my best friend too. Seeing as we spent a ton of time together, that was a major bonus.

“Hey girls! Two coffees?” Janet James asked as she passed our table with a tray full of dirty dishes. Janet was the owner of the café and was there almost all the time.

“You got it,” I said quickly.

“Give me a few,” Janet said as she walked swiftly to the counter and slipped behind it, disappearing through a swinging door.

A line cook was busy at the grill, swiftly sliding food onto plates, which were whisked away by the waitress. I scanned the café, a bit relieved I didn’t see anyone I knew too well. Oh, I knew most everyone at a glance, but I’d been laying low in the days since I’d come back on the heels of my disastrous wedding that never was. Lucy took a call on her phone, and my mind instantly skipped to Cade. This was becoming a problem. If I didn’t have something to do or someone to talk to, Cade strolled into my thoughts—bold as ever.

Only two days had passed since I’d almost lost my mind over him, and I’d wasted countless hours thinking about him. All I wanted was to see him again…and again and again. Somehow, we’d gotten to a place of sort of normal before he’d offered me a ride back to Willow Brook. I’d wanted—desperately wanted—to hide away at Quinn’s cabin with Cade and just forget about everything else. But it wasn’t that simple, and I damn well knew it. He might’ve brought me to the only orgasm I’d had with someone else in seven years, but that didn’t mean we’d managed to wade through the all the hurt from before.

I was still trying to absorb what he’d told me on the drive back from Anchorage. I definitely got that he’d been hurt and angry I never even gave him a chance to explain. I’d been too damn angry to see him and talk to him. I’d shied away from thinking about any of it for most of the time. It hurt too much. Thinking about it now, I was tempted to start asking anyone who might know more about how stupid I’d been. Shannon had never once tried to talk to me before she moved away. I knew there would be a few people who might have the lowdown on why Shannon did what she did.

“Yoohoo, you’re zoning out again,” Lucy said, waving her hand back and forth.

I looked up from the table. “Huh?”

Lucy rolled her eyes. “Okay. Time to chat,” she said matter-of-factly. “You walked out on Earl. I’m not gonna say…”

“Oh, you can tell me you told me so. You did,” I said with a sad smile. Lucy had shared her concern more than once that Earl and I were, well, Lucy’s description for it was ‘like bland oatmeal.’

Lucy smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “I don’t want to tell you I told you so because I wish I’d been wrong. I’ve left you be since you showed up out of nowhere for work yesterday, but mind telling me how you’re doing?”

I shrugged and rolled my hand back and forth. “Not great. I feel like shit. I decided I should at least face Earl right off when I got back to town the day before yesterday, but he wasn’t home.”

Lucy leaned back in her chair when Janet approached our table. She set two coffees down and glanced between us. “Food?”

“Just bring us the lunch special today,” Lucy said.

“Two salmon burgers. Anything with them?” Janet returned.

“Fries,” I added.

“Got it,” Janet called as she spun away.

Lucy took a sip of her coffee and angled her head to the side. “Earl’s not home because he took off on a fishing trip with his brother.” She didn’t succeed in masking the slight curl to her lip.

Lucy had been pretty direct that she didn’t think Earl appreciated me for who I was. She hadn’t known me well when I’d been with Cade, so she hadn’t known how much I knew I was missing.

I stared at her. “He went on a fishing trip?”

Lucy sighed. “Uh huh. Amelia, I’d like to say the guy was crushed when you left him before he even got to the altar, but he wasn’t. He told his dad what happened, and they came out together to announce the wedding was off. While we were all wondering where the hell you were and your mom was freaking out, he told everyone to enjoy the reception next door. Next thing I heard, he’d left to go fishing with Dan.” Lucy ended with a shrug, her eyes scanning my face.

I felt the sting in my heart. It would be flat ridiculous for me to feel heartbroken over learning my ex-fiancée had so easily accepted me walking out on our wedding. It hurt only in the sense that it reinforced all the reasons I’d bolted. If there was one question I’d like to ask Earl—when he returned from his flipping fishing trip—it would be what he’d wanted from being with me in the first place.

“You okay?” Lucy asked.

I took a gulp of my coffee. “I’m fine. It just sucks. It’s exactly why I couldn’t go through with marrying him. I wish like hell I’d come to my senses a lot sooner, but it is what it is.” I paused and glanced to the door when I heard the bells jingle its opening.

A cluster of hikers entered. I couldn’t help but feel a tiny bit disappointed. I kept expecting to see Cade and beating back the hope every time I didn’t.

“Okay, something else is up with you? I guess I figured the whole wedding-not wedding would be what’s on your mind, but that’s not it,” Lucy said, her eyes narrowing when I glanced back her way.

I couldn’t hide the flush that heated my cheeks. Lucy didn’t say another word and angled her head to the side.

I took another gulp of coffee, nearly slamming my mug down on the table.

“Fine. I saw Cade.”

“Cade Masters? The guy you were gaga over before. I barely knew him in high school, but it was impossible not to know who he was. All the girls drooled over him. I know about the whole ugly mess with your old friend Shannon. So what happened?”

I closed my eyes and took a breath. “He happened to show up at the bar where I might’ve gotten in a fistfight,” I said, gesturing to my fading black eye.

Fortunately, the guy who’d punched me had shitty aim. He’d connected with my face, but his fist had slid off of my cheek after a glancing blow. The bruising wasn’t too bad and already fading.

Lucy’s eyes widened. “You know, I should win some serious points for keeping my mouth shut on that. I took one look at you and knew there was a story, but I figured you’d tell me in good time. You started a fight, got a black eye and your old boyfriend showed up to rescue you?”

“That about sums it up.”

Lucy circled her hand in the air. “Oh, you’re not even close to done. What else happened?”

My mind flashed to the hot, mind-bending, heart-clenching moments at the cabin. Just thinking about it sent heat sliding through my veins. I looked over at Lucy and sighed. “Maybe a little bit more. I’m all mixed up,” I said, my voice cracking at the end.

The teasing gleam disappeared from Lucy’s eyes. “Hey, it’s okay. It’s been a bumpy few days for you. I didn’t mean…” She paused when Janet arrived to serve our food.

I was relieved at the interruption. I was also beyond grateful Lucy was the kind of friend she was. Lucy intuitively knew when someone needed space and didn’t mind giving it to them. She settled in to eat, while I nibbled at my food, too mentally distracted to do much of anything else. I’d worked so hard at shoving thoughts of Cade out of my mind for so long, it was hard to think about him, much less talk about him. He’d occupied a huge place in my heart once upon a time. Then, it shattered into pieces. I’d avoided the shards of glass by sweeping them out of sight. In a few short days, I’d averted making a huge mistake by walking out on Earl, seen Cade for the first time in too long, and learned that my version of his betrayal was a bit off. I knew he harbored his own pain and resentment. I could feel it radiating from him. There was a jumble of tangled emotions to get through, and I didn’t even know how to talk about him.

After a few minutes of eating, I looked over at Lucy. “Me and Cade are messy. I loved him like crazy and then it all blew up. We had a chance to talk and, well, it seems like maybe I missed a few details of how things went down with Shannon.”

Lucy paused in her chewing and took a giant gulp of water from the glass Janet had set on the table beside her. “Wait a minute. You never talk about Cade. Like ever. I left it alone because I figured, well, it was the past. What did you miss? Please tell me you knew he never had anything to do with Shannon. Because even I knew that.”

My mouth fell open. “Huh? How do you know that?”

Lucy smacked her forehead with her hand. “Everyone knows. Just like everyone knows talking about Cade around you means you walk away. Okay, I wasn’t close to you back then, so better to hear it from me than anyone else. Shannon had a nasty breakup, remember? I don’t even know the guy’s name, but some guy from college.”

I nodded, my gut churning. It was making me sick to realize maybe I’d made things worse by being so damn determined not to talk about Cade.

Lucy continued, “Anyway, she came back to town and made a play for Cade right away. He threw her out and that was that. Trust me, ask anyone. Shannon was all pissy about the whole thing.” Lucy paused for another bite of her burger. After she finished chewing, she looked over at me. “Do you mean to tell me you’re so damn stubborn, you never figured this out?”

I swallowed against the tightness in my chest and nodded. That was me all right, stubborn as hell.

Lucy’s eyes got sad. “Oh hon. Good grief. That sucks. I mean, all anyone ever says about you and Cade was you two were perfect together. So what happened when you saw him? How do you feel?”

The bell over the door jingled again, and I reflexively glanced over my shoulder. Cade strode in, his subtle, almost lazy swagger making me hot all over. His brown hair was mussed. With him attired in faded black jeans that hugged his muscled legs and a black t-shirt that did absolutely nothing to disguise every inch of his hard chest, all I could do was stare at him.

His eyes caught mine from across the room, and he angled his head slightly in recognition. My pulse lunged, butterflies amassed in my belly, and my mouth went dry.

“Oh God,” Lucy said wryly.

I tore my eyes from Cade and looked over at Lucy. “What?”

Lucy’s mouth curled up at once corner as she shook her head slowly. “Well, now I know why Earl never did a thing for you. Girl, you have got it bad and so does he. Be careful and don’t burn this place down just looking at each other.”