Chapter 44
Lily
"Hun, I'm gonna need you to lose the shirt."
I glance over at Rob and roll my eyes without even trying to hide it. He gives me a shameless grin as the man in front of us reaches for the hem of his shirt and starts undoing the buttons.
This is starting to feel a little porn-y. Especially with the Marvin Gaye song playing on loop in the background. I'd say that “Let's Get It On” is a tad suggestive for the current situation. But I'm the only one in the room who seems to mind.
I turn to Siobhan, hoping that she’ll talk reason to Rob. But I should know better. “Yes,” she agrees as she flips through the model's thick, colorful portfolio. He's been in all the big magazines over the past few months and he dominated the catwalk during Fashion Week. Any layperson can see why — the guy is incredible-looking. "Sell us the fantasy, babe. Make us want that wrist watch. Make us crave that wrist watch," she says breathily. She wears a completely straight face and aside from the string of drool clinging to her bottom lip, she comes across as a complete professional.
Not a sneaky, little predator who’s enjoying the chance to objectify the tall, lean tower of testosterone standing before us.
I kick her under the table and she picks up her glass of ice water, bringing it to her lips to hide her devious smile.
Jason Cruz on the other hand carries himself with utter professionalism. It's to be expected, though. He's a top pick of Swag Model's men's division and one of the best paid male models in the world. He's accustomed to having mere mortals salivating over his stone-carved physique.
He shrugs his shirt off of his shoulders before undoing the top button of his fly and striking a pose that would inspire Leonardo DaVinci.
Rob's gasp echoes through the room. One look at this guy's body and Siobhan is choking on her ice water.
Yeh, yeh. I get it. He's hot. But we've spent all morning auditioning models for a luxury watch photo shoot that we're doing next week. Can we just pick someone and get it over with?
"Jason, can we have your comp card?" I ask impatiently, "We'll give your agency a call if we need you."
He hands me a glossy piece of paper covered with his headshot and a few editorial shots along with his measurements and contact information.
"Thank you," I say as I accept it.
He gives me a smile...It's meant to set my panties on fire.
Oh honey, my bladder is so close to exploding right now that those flames wouldn't stand a chance.
He says his goodbyes and turns toward the door, giving us a view of his muscular back, narrow waist and tight ass as he goes.
Shameless, I tell you.
I can almost smell the smoke billowing from Siobhan and Rob's loins but me, I'm dead on the inside. It will take a lot more than a half-naked male model to ignite the part of me that froze over when my heart crumbled in Jakob's hands.
The only thing that's keeping me going is the knowledge that I have a life growing inside of me, a child who will be here soon, who will need diapers and blankets and love. A child who will need heart surgery. If it wasn't for my baby, I'd be curled up in the fetal position right now, lamenting over my wounds. But I've got to keep going. Single mommas don't get to feel sorry for themselves.
I push away from the table, stretching my legs.
"Just where do you think you're going?" Rob asks in that snarky way of his.
I glance at the clock on the wall. "It's lunch time my friend, and I am eating for two."
"Sit. Sit," Siobhan insists, gesturing dramatically with her slender hand.
I dance in place. "I really need to go to the bathroom."
She gives me placating eyes. "I think we only have one more. Then we'll go to Gilbert's and I’ll watch you eat taco-style loaded potatoes. My treat."
My stomach rumbles. "Now, you're just playing dirty, Siobhan." She grins victoriously as I plop back into the chair. The truth is, she had me at 'my treat'. Every penny counts and I'm trying to save as much as I can before this baby comes.
I spin around in my chair and reach for some of the snacks sitting on the window sill behind the table where we're sitting. I'm dying for loaded potatoes. With cheese. And refried beans. And salsa. Yeh, lots of cheese. And those salty, spicy, vinegary peppers. (What are they called?) But this dry, crumby granola bar will have to do for now.
"Send in the last model," Rob barks at one of the interns and a second later, I hear footsteps approaching.
I take a bite of my snack bar and feel crumbs tumbling down my chin and into my cleavage. Awesome! I think as I reach for a napkin and try to brush the mess away.
When I spin my chair around, my mouth drops open as a huge man in an olive green shirt and a big old cowboy hat approaches us.
"Well, good morning," Rob growls, cat claws swiping through the air. "Who are you?"
Siobhan grins slyly. "This is Jakob Wilkinson. He doesn't have a modelling agent but when he reached out to me and expressed that he wanted to participate in the casting, I couldn't refuse."
My throat caves in on itself, my palms go damp and I feel all those damn hormone-fuelled emotions stinging at my eyes.
Jakob is here. He's standing right here.
My system struggles to compute that tiny bit of information. I thought I'd never see him again. I was trying to make peace with that fact. I was trying to focus on the baby and put him out of my mind.
Why is he standing here?
Siobhan's voice cuts through my thoughts. "Now take off your shirt, sir!” she commands with a predatory glint on her face.
Jakob starts to protest. "Well, I didn't actually come here to audition —"
Siobhan becomes stern. “Look, mister — this was part of our deal. If you want the opportunity to be here right now, the shirt has got to go!"
Rob pounds his fists into the table rhythmically. "Take it off! Take it off!" he hoots.
Jakob chuckles under his breath, his eyes locked on me. My heart beats double-time as he peels off his cowboy hat and sets it on the table in front of me. He reaches for the hem of his shirt and begins working on the buttons. My nipples grow tighter with each button that gets undone. My mouth is so dry that my tongue is about to cause rug burns on my palate. I can't think of any words to say as he frees himself of the shirt, letting it flutter to the ground.
He leans down over me, both of his hands pressed flat on the table. "So, what do you think, miss? Do you think I’ve got a shot?" he says in a growl. My pussy clenches violently as his heat and musk encapsulate me.
I'm vaguely aware of Siobhan pushing a confused and protesting Rob toward the door. "Sweetie, we're gonna go grab lunch. We'll let you decide what to do with this sexy cowboy. And I’m assuming you’ll need the rest of the day off. You’d better not be here when I get back." The door shuts heavily behind them.
I stand and round the table. "You shouldn't be here." I hold a hand out protectively in front of me.
Jakob faces me with his fists balled at his sides. "Stop it, Lily."
"You really don't know anything about me," I continue.
"Stop it."
"I'm pregnant with some other guy's kid."
"Lily!"
The sternness in his voice causes me to freeze. Damn — he does bossy so well. My mouth snaps shut. He has my full attention now.
"Good," he smirks with satisfaction. "Before you turn me away and send me back to Reyfield disappointed and heartbroken, give me a fair chance to make my case."
I heave a sigh and purse my lips as my arms cross over my chest. There's so much I want to say right now.
I hold my tongue.
"Sit down," he orders me. The urge to protest is strong but I'm so heady off of possibility that I do exactly as he says.
When I'm seated, he goes over to the door and grabs something from the hallway. It's his guitar. I find myself giggling. My insides tighten with anticipation.
Perching on the edge of the table, he begins to strum. I recognize that riff. I recognize it. Is it Bad to the Bone by George Thorogood? I’m pretty sure it is.
Jakob’s deep, smoky growl fills the room.
I was just a farmer, working hard on my land
Though I’d never admit it, I’was a lonely man
Then one random morning, I knocked some random door
Caught a glimpse of Sunshine, she left me wanting more
At first I was stupid, I tried to stay away
But deep down I knew that, she w’s the best part of the day
One morning I woke up, and she was in my bed
She stole my heart with her smile then, started giving me head
I burst into giggles over his horribly corny lyrics but he carries on, strumming away undeterred.
I can’t leave you alone, Lily-Lily-Lily-Lily
I can’t leave you alone, I can’t leave you alone
The rest of the lyrics get lost as tears pour down my face and my brain turns to mush. I'm shaking, clutching my belly as all of my resistance melts from the inside out. Our situation is far from perfect. He has no idea. He has no idea of all the obstacles ahead of us.
He sets his guitar on the table and comes around to me. He rolls my chair back and kneels in front of me. "Lily, I was a fool to let you walk away from me. I was a fool to think that I'd ever be able to recover from losing you. You are the best thing that ever walked into my life. You gave my heart a reason to beat again." His hand settles on my belly. "You and this baby are everything to me.” His voice cracks roughly. “But I thought you wanted to be in the city, to work at your fancy job, to get back with your ex-boyfriend—”
“I told you I was done with him!” I say, irritated.
He sighs roughly. “I know, I know…” I crumble at his vulnerability.
My fingers trail over his thick biceps, across his sunkissed skin. "Oh Jakob..."
"I'll admit it — I'm scared. I'm scared that I won't be enough. I'm scared that I won't be able to give you all the things you want. I won't ever be able to afford those designer handbags and those fancy pajamas you like. I'm telling you straight. But I will work hard every single day, wake up with the sun every single morning to make sure that you and this baby and his many, many brothers and sisters have everything you need." His eyes plead with me.
"This is complicated," I cry. "You're a good man, Jakob. I want you but you don't deserve this mess of a life." I lean away from him, putting distance between us. "One day, you'll find a good woman. One that's kind and available and uncomplicated. One that's good for you."
Frustration glows in his eyes. He grips my knees tightly and he roars. "It's you or nothin', Lily. It's you or nobody. Why can't you see that?"
I'm a wreck. My mascara burns my eyes and my lips tremble uncontrollably. He's laying it bare for me and I can hear the abandon in his voice. “I feel the same way…”
I bend closer and he presses his mouth to mine. My pussy does obscene things as he cups my jaw in his palm, deepening the kiss. My brain short-circuits when his tongue slides along mine, twisting and curling around my heated flesh.
Emotion flurries inside of me. Nobody's ever wanted me before. But Jakob is here. For me. For me and the baby.
He pulls back, hands still caressing my face as he watches me, eyes blurry with emotion. "I love you, woman," he rasps out.
I sigh, my heart swelling fast. This is everything I’ve ever wanted. “I love you, too."