Emme
There was a knock at the door. It was a few minutes after five o’clock on Friday evening and I had just finished packing up everything I needed to take to Zane’s house tonight. I walked to the door and opened it. As soon as I opened the door and saw him I let out the breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding. Zane’s beautiful face was smiling back at me.
“Hi Zane,” I said.
He stared at me a moment, still smiling.
“Hello, sweetheart,” he said as he finally stepped inside and pressed a kiss to my forehead. The simple gesture made my heart swell.
I stepped back so he could come fully inside. Then, I closed the door.
“How was training today?” I asked.
“Good. I’m finding that I am more motivated as each day passes. Of course, now I’ve got someone I’m trying to make a lasting impression on going out to Aspen, so that pushes me to train harder every day.”
“Snowboarding or not, you’re the kind of guy that leaves a lasting impression no matter what. I think you’ll accomplish your mission.”
He wrapped an arm around my shoulder and gave me a squeeze.
“You ready?” he asked.
“Yes, but I’ve got a lot of stuff to take. I am going to need some help carrying it all.”
“Not a problem.”
With that, I led Zane into the kitchen where I had packed the food I was planning for dinner tonight, my camera equipment for tomorrow, and my overnight bag for, well, overnight. As he took in everything I had packed up he just chuckled and walked over to it all.
He hoisted everything but the overnight bag up into his arms, looked to me and asked, “How heavy is that?”
“Not so heavy that I can’t carry this and something else,” I answered.
“Ok. Get that and I’ve got the rest.”
The two of us walked out of the front door and I locked up. We made it to the Raptor where Zane put all of my stuff he’d been carrying into the back seat. He then took my overnight bag from me, helped me into the front seat, put my bag in the back, and climbed in the driver’s seat. At that, we took off to his place.
Once we arrived at Zane’s he helped me out of the truck then grabbed my overnight bag and the food. As soon as he opened the door, I immediately walked to the kitchen. He followed behind me and set the food I had packed on the island.
“I’m sorry that bag was so heavy,” I began. “I wasn’t sure if you had a rice cooker, so I brought mine. Makes things much easier. I figured you might be hungry after a long day on the mountain. I didn’t want to make something that would take too long, so I decided to make my beef and broccoli. It should only take about twenty-five minutes or so.”
“Appreciate it, Em. I’m starved. Going to strip out of these clothes and take a hot shower. I’ll be back before dinner is ready.”
I let my eyes roam his body while I licked my lips and swallowed hard at the thought of him stripping out of his clothes and being naked in the shower. I really wanted to join him. Damn.
When my eyes made their way back to his I found him looking at me with a questioning look and a cocked eyebrow.
Embarrassed, I looked away wishing I could control my body’s reaction to this beautiful man.
Zane walked over and stood within inches of me. He brought his fingers to my jaw, turned my head to look at him, and said, “Already gave you my word that I’d respect what you asked for and keep this nonsexual and friendly. I’m trying my hardest to honor that, Em. Problem is, I can see that even you don’t like the decision you’ve made. This needs to be on your terms, but I can tell you want this just as much as I do. The ball is in your court, Emme. This is the last thing I’ll say about this and I won’t bring it up again, but if you decide to follow through on what you really want, feel free to join me upstairs.”
With that, he turned around and walked out of the kitchen. I stood there, my body on fire, wishing I had the courage to go after him. Instead, I unpacked the bags and started dinner, hating that I was such a coward.
Twenty minutes later, Zane walked back into the kitchen. I had just finished making the food and was ready to serve it. I took out two bowls, filled Zane’s with rice, and then covered it with the steaming hot beef and broccoli. He was sitting at one of the bar stools on the island so I took the bowl over and placed it in front of him.
“Smells great, Em. Thanks,” he said.
I smiled back at him and said, “You’re welcome.”
I turned around to fix myself a bowl and then I joined Zane at one of the barstools next to his.
“How is it?” I asked.
He finished chewing, swallowed, and replied, “Hope there’s more.”
I guess he liked it. Confirmation that he enjoyed and appreciated the food I cooked did things for me I’d never be able to explain. I just let the happiness his affirmation brought me sink in while we ate dinner.
“Favorite color,” Zane blurted after he had filled his bowl with seconds.
“What?” I asked.
“Your favorite color. What is it?”
“Depends.”
“On what?” he questioned as he chuckled.
“What are we talking about? Clothes? A car? Eyes? I’d pick something different for all of those.”
He laughed at me and said, “Ok, tell me those three then.”
“Grey, white, and blue. Yours?”
“Same subjects?” he confirmed.
I nodded.
“Black, white, and green.”
I smiled. My favorite eye color was blue, which was the color of his eyes. I’m not sure if green was really his favorite eye color or if he was just trying to make me feel good since that was the color of my eyes. Either way, it didn’t matter to me.
“Favorite topping on pizza?” I asked.
“You don’t even want to know what my favorite food is first?” he retorted.
“Are you suggesting that pizza isn’t your favorite food?” I responded.
“No, but not sure how you would know that.”
“Pizza is like the universal favorite food, Zane. It’s at the top of my list, too. So, favorite topping?”
“Peppers and onions. Yours?”
“Mushrooms.”
“Favorite type of movie?”
“Romantic comedy or animated. You?”
“Animated? Really?” he asked, disbelievingly.
“Tell me that you don’t enjoy watching an animated film. That takes me back to my childhood, where life was simple, easy, and carefree.”
“Fair enough. Action or a comedy for me.”
I smiled up at him.
Zane and I finished eating our dinner and moved to the couch in the great room while throwing question after question at each other in an effort to get to know more about one another. It was the most fun I had had in a very long time, even more fun than some of my recent encounters with Zane, and some of those were really, really fun. I think the reason I enjoyed this so much was because there was no pressure. It was simply just the two of us getting to know one another and trying to develop a deeper friendship. We spent a lot of time laughing, especially when one of us would give an answer that the other thought was completely absurd. We laughed so much I started getting side stitches.
After a while, either we ran out of questions or we both were worn out from the incessant laughing. We stared at each other a beat with an intensity that said so much more than either of us could have expressed with words. For me, it was a bit of longing mixed with fear. That fear was comprised of many things. At the forefront of my mind was always the worry and fear for his safety, but now it was coupled with fear that I’d lose this one day. Zane’s look seemed to be a bit of adoration mixed with frustration. I couldn’t say that I didn’t have those same feelings as well.
“Damn, Emme, didn’t realize until just now how much I missed being around you.”
“Zane…” I trailed off, not having any other words.
“I’m serious, Em. Been training so hard over the last week and was grateful for the times I got to talk with you on the phone, but seeing your face and hearing you laugh in person after such a long week is the greatest reward.”
“I’ve missed you, too.”
“I am exhausted. My body took a beating this week and I really need to get in bed to sleep so I can recover a bit for tomorrow. Don’t really want to do that now, though.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. You don’t have to stay awake to entertain me. This is probably why I should have stayed home and just met you at Parks Ridge tomorrow morning.”
“Don’t apologize, Em. I wanted you here.”
“Well, it’s getting late and I know you’ve got to be tired. I could stand to get a good night’s sleep, too. Can you just show me where I can change and sleep and I’ll be out of your hair?”
“Have a couple of guest bedrooms, but don’t really want you in any of them,” he admitted.
I jerked my head back at his statement. I hadn’t expected that out of him. Still, he was offering to allow me to go with him while he trained tomorrow so that I could get a bit more experience before going to the X Games so he wasn’t a total asshole. I tried to swallow past the hurt I felt at his statement.
“Fuck,” he began. “Sorry, sweetheart. You took that the wrong way. You are welcome to stay in any one of the guest bedrooms I have if that’s where you want to be for the night. I just meant that I’d prefer you with me, in my room in my bed. And not for any reason other than to be next to you.”
“Oh,” I said. “I’m not sure that would be a good idea.”
“I know,” he said as he looked away, clenching his jaw.
It broke my heart to see the disappointment and frustration in his face.
Zane stood up from the couch, turned back, held a hand out to me and said, “Come on.”
I put my hand in his and stood. I followed Zane out of the great room, back through the kitchen where he grabbed my bag, and down the hall to the stairs. Zane waited for me to walk up the steps ahead of him.
When we reached the top of the steps he moved to my side and pointed to the left, “I’ll be right down here at the end of the hall.”
I looked to where he was pointing and saw a set of double doors at the end of the hall.
“Ok,” I said.
“Don’t want you too far away. You can stay in the guest room just outside of my bedroom,” he said as he took my hand in his and started walking down the hall.
As we approached the door just outside of his bedroom he let go of my hand to open the door then put his hand to the small of my back to usher me into the room. I walked into the room and said the first thing that came to my mind, “This is your guest bedroom?”
Zane laughed. “Yeah, Em.”
“It’s beautiful, Zane,” I said as I took in my surroundings. Straight ahead on the opposite side of the room were floor-to-ceiling windows and a set of French doors that led out to a balcony. To the left, a stone fireplace sat positioned directly across from the king-size bed. A flat screen television was situated on the stone above the fireplace. A beige carpet was on the floor with ivory bed linens and a cream-colored chair and ottoman sat in the far corner of the room near the windows while a bench sat at the foot of the bed.
“Even more beautiful now,” he added.
I looked to him and saw he was staring at me. He watched me for a moment before he moved to put my bag on the bench at the end of the bed.
“The bathroom is through that door,” he began as he pointed to the door directly to the right of where I was standing, which was just inside the door to the bedroom. “Make yourself comfortable. If you need anything at all, I’m right next to you. Just come and get me, ok?”
I nodded, “Thank you, Zane.”
He took a few steps toward me so that he was standing only inches away. He brought his hand up to wrap around the back of my neck and whispered, “You’re welcome. Good night, sweetheart.”
Then, he pressed a kiss to the top of my head before he walked out of the room.
I stood there motionless trying to stop myself from chasing after him. After a few minutes, I talked myself out of it, moved to grab my bag off the bench, and walked into the bathroom. Upon entering the guest bathroom, I had a reaction very similar to the one I had when I entered the bedroom. It was absolutely gorgeous. The floors had large light brown and ivory-colored tiles that covered the entire space as well as the step leading up to the soaking tub located at the center of the back wall directly across from where I was standing. To the right of the tub was the glass paneled stand-up shower. A double vanity went along the wall between the door to the bathroom and the stand-up shower. To the left of the tub was a separate door that led to the toilet.
After I finished ogling the bathroom, I decided to hop in the shower. I turned on the water, retrieved my toiletries from my bag, and stripped out of my clothes. I quickly did my business in the shower, turned off the water, stepped out onto the bathmat, and wrapped one of Zane’s towels around me. Even though it took forever given the amount of hair I had, I hated going to bed with wet hair so I took out the hair dryer and got most of the moisture out of my hair. I put on my lotion, grabbed a pair of panties from my bag, and threw on my cotton nightie. It was a lavender nightie with tiny white polka dots that had thin spaghetti straps, a built-in shelf bra, and came to mid-thigh.
I walked back out into the bedroom, pulled the covers back, and climbed into the bed. I stayed there a while attempting to fall asleep so that I’d be well rested for a long day out in the cold tomorrow. I tossed and turned for quite some time before I realized I was no closer to finding sleep. My mind raced with thoughts of Zane. The laughter we shared earlier in the day, the frustration on his face before we came upstairs, and the gentle kiss he pressed to my head before he went to his room. My thoughts then drifted to the fact that he was in bed in the room right next to mine and I’m certain that’s what prevented me from falling asleep. Realizing I would have no luck falling asleep and knowing he was genuine in what he said to me both downstairs and before he walked out of this room nearly two hours ago, I decided to get out of the bed. I opened the door, walked out of the room, and lightly tapped on the door to Zane’s room. I saw the barest hint of light filtering out from under the door.
Seconds later, the door opened and Zane stood before me in a pair of boxer briefs. My eyes traveled down his body and I was immediately turned on.
“You ok?” he asked.
I looked back up to his face to see his eyes had begun to roam my body as well. When they came back to meet mine I swallowed before whispering, “Couldn’t sleep.”
He gave me a warm smile, but said nothing.
I looked anywhere but at his face when I quietly inquired, “I was wondering if the offer to be next to you in your bed was still open.”
He put his fingers to my jaw and moved my face toward his. He then said, “Always, sweetheart.”
At that statement, he pushed open the door, took me by the hand, and pulled me into the room. The room was dark so I couldn’t take in too much of my surroundings, but I could tell that it was massive in size and the bed was the largest I had ever seen (or slept in, for that matter).
Zane closed the door and led me to the bed. He stood waiting for me to climb in. I finally crawled into the bed and started working my way over to the opposite side. I felt an arm wrap around my waist. I let out a small squeal and tensed up as Zane hauled me up next to his body, my back to his front.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“Helping you sleep, Em.”
“Um, I’m not sure that…” I said, before he cut me off.
“Insisted on staying in a separate room earlier tonight, Emme. Two hours later you are knocking on my door wanting to be next to me. You aren’t going to sleep on the other side of the bed. Just relax and let me hold you.”
My body stayed tense for quite a while, but I eventually began to feel the comfort and warmth that Zane’s body was providing me so I relaxed and settled into it. I actually found myself trying to get closer to it, to him.
“Em?”
“Yeah?” I responded as I felt the warmth from his incredible voice surround me.
“Happy to feel the tension leaving your body and I’m trying my best here, but I’m fighting a losing battle. Think you could help me out here and stop wiggling your luscious ass against my dick?”
I immediately froze and apologized, “I’m sorry.”
“It’s ok. Just get some sleep, alright?”
And because his sexy voice had done such an incredible job in settling me I said, “Alright, Barry.”
I felt Zane’s body shaking behind mine and knew he was laughing. I smiled inwardly as I felt Zane’s arm tighten around my waist. Ten minutes later, I was asleep.
*****
Warmth. I felt so incredibly warm and comfortable. I was going to stay in my bed all day. Then, I realized I wasn’t alone and I wasn’t in my bed. I froze. I was in Zane’s bed. I couldn’t sleep last night and I came to his bedroom. He graciously allowed me to spend the night in his bed and refused to have me outside of his reach.
Like right now, I was on my side facing Zane. My eyes were closed, but I knew he was on his side facing me because his arm was draped over my waist.
I peeled my eyelids open and chanced a peek up at him. He was still asleep so I took that time to stare at his exquisite form. He was absolute perfection. His dark hair had me itching to run my fingers through it. His flawless lips were urging me to press mine to them. His broad shoulders and thick, muscled arms made me want to curl up inside of them where I knew I’d always be safe.
I needed to get out of this bed before I actually acted out any of my daydreams. As carefully and quietly as I could I rolled to the opposite side and started to scoot to the other side of the bed. I made it about two feet away before I felt Zane’s arm wrap around my waist again and cease my movements.
“Trying to sneak away?” Zane’s incredibly sexy morning voice said in my ear.
This was precisely what I needed to get away from. I wasn’t sure I had the willpower to stop myself from jumping on top of him if I didn’t get out of this bed immediately.
“I figured I’d better get up and get ready for today. I don’t want to make you late.”
“Does it look like I’m in a rush?” he asked.
I rolled to my back and turned my head toward him. “No.”
“You sleep ok?” he asked.
Damn it. Why did he have to give me any indication that he cared?
I nodded. “Sorry for waking you last night. I appreciate you letting me stay in here with you. I’m not sure I would have fallen asleep in the guest room.”
“Please don’t apologize. Didn’t really much care for you being in the next room anyway. I’m glad you came to me last night. Wish you’d come to me more often.”
I tensed at his words. The same words he says to me in my nightmares. Come to me. Oddly enough, I didn’t have one last night. Regardless, those words were haunting.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, immediately sensing my tension.
Shit.
I shook my head trying to play it off and said, “Nothing.”
“I saw it and felt it, Emme. It’s something.”
I let out a sigh. “You’re right. It is. You’ve said those words to me before, Zane.”
His eyebrows drew together and I could tell he was trying to recall when he said them. “Em?” he finally asked, willing me to share something more with him.
I stared at him a beat before I said, “Come to me. You’ve said it before, but you don’t recall it because you say it in my nightmares.”
Now it was his turn to go solid. He quickly recovered and said with a pleading tone, “Tell me, sweetheart.”
I closed my eyes and turned my head away from his. “I can’t,” I whispered, feeling my throat constrict. I tried to swallow hard past the lump forming in my throat. This is not how I wanted this day to go. I was beginning to think jumping him would have been a better alternative. I knew if he pressed me further I’d lose it completely.
“Hey, hey, hey,” he began, softly. “It’s ok. I want you to tell me, Emme, but not if it’s going to bring you to tears and ruin your day. We can try another time; whenever you’re ready. And if you don’t get there, as disappointing as that is, that’s ok, too.”
Relieved, I took in a few deep breaths, turned to him, and said, “Thank you.”
He eyes searched mine a moment before he urged, “Go ahead and get ready. I’ll make you breakfast this morning.”
My eyes rounded. “I thought you didn’t cook.”
“I don’t, but this is breakfast. Breakfast is easy,” he said as he pressed a kiss to my forehead and sat up in the bed, swinging his legs over the side.
I smiled up at him and then I climbed out of the bed. Zane got himself ready and went down to make breakfast while I did an inventory of his room. I was sitting in the middle of what had to be a custom-made bed. It was huge. The bed was located on the wall opposite the double doors and had a nightstand flanking each side. To my left there was another set of doors, one of which was slightly ajar. I could see that was his walk-in closet. To my right, lots of natural light filtered in through the floor-to-ceiling windows and French doors that led out to a balcony. The view from his bedroom was breathtaking. In the right corner of the room on the wall opposite of the bed was a door that I imagined led in the master bath. In between the doors to the bedroom and the bathroom door was a beautiful floor to ceiling stone fireplace. I loved his bedroom. It felt warm, cozy, and inviting.
Once I had sufficiently taken in his bedroom, I went back to the guest room to get ready. I finished up and met him downstairs for breakfast. After we ate, we loaded ourselves and our gear into the truck, and made our way over to Parks Ridge. I then spent the day taking pictures of Zane while he trained.
By the end of the day, I felt much more confident in covering the X Games event for Blackman Boards. Zane took me home afterward, though, not because he wanted me there. He asked me to stay with him again, but I didn’t think it was a good idea to keep torturing myself or him so I asked him to take my home. He begrudgingly agreed to my wishes. After walking me to my door, Zane hugged me and pressed a kiss to the top of my head. I fought the urge to ask him to stay, thanked him for the day, and wished him a good night.
I locked up and made my way to my bedroom. After taking a shower and doing my nighttime routine, I climbed into bed. It was then I realized that no matter how many blankets I put on my bed, I’d never be as warm as I felt when I was lying next to Zane.