Chapter Twenty

Jordan

God, I hope this is the right decision.

I draw a deep breath as I turn the knob of the bedroom door. Claus jumps off the bed with his light-up toy sword in hand.

"Hey." I step inside the room. "Did you behave like I asked?"

He nods. I look around the room. No sign of any disaster.

"What do you have there, buddy?" Lance asks.

Claus beams. "My sword."

"Cool."

Claus runs to him and wraps his arms around his legs. "Are you not leaving anymore?"

"No," Lance answers. "I'm not going anywhere. And I'm sorry I left without saying goodbye. I was in a bit of a rush because I thought my mom was hurt."

Claus's eyes grow wide. "You have a mom, too?"

"Of course," Lance answers.

I chuckle. "So how is she?"

"Nothing serious, but she was happy to see me."

"Of course she was." I clear my throat. "Claus, darling, Lance and I have something very important to tell you."

He looks up at me. "What?"

I grab his arm and lead him back to the bed. We sit on the edge, and Lance sits down too.

"I'm your mommy, right?"

Claus nods.

"You know how some kids have both a mommy and a daddy?"

Another nod.

"You asked me once where your daddy was and I told you I'd tell you one day. Well, that day is here." I squeeze his hand. "I'm going to tell you about your daddy."

"Okay."

I glance at Lance. If he's nervous, it's not showing.

I draw another deep breath. "Claus, your daddy... is sitting right next to you."

His eyebrows crease. "But you're my mommy."

"The other side."

He turns his head. My heart stops as he just stares at Lance. Then a smile forms on his lips and I feel a thorn come off my chest.

"Lance, you're my daddy?" Claus asks.

Lance nods. "Your mommy's right. I am."

The sword in Claus's hands clatters to the floor. His arms go around Lance's neck.

"Daddy!"

The sound of that one word from his lips, the sight of his face filled with joy - it makes me want to burst into tears.

Lance hugs him tight. "From now on, you and I are going to be a great team. And we're going to go on lots of adventures."

"Where?" Claus asks.

"Anywhere you want."

"Can we go to the North Pole? Now?"

Lance and I laugh.

"But I want to see Santa," Claus says.

"You know Santa does things top secret," I tell Claus. "Besides, he's very busy right now."

"I thought the elves did all the work."

Lance laughs.

"The elves make the toys," I say. "But Santa has to make sure they're all perfect. And Santa has to do a lot of special stuff so he can be ready when it's time to deliver the presents."

Claus gives in. "Okay."

"But maybe someday, we can go somewhere where we can see reindeer," Lance says.

"Real reindeer?" Claus asks.

Lance nods.

"Hurray!" Claus jumps up and down.

I let out a sigh. I can already see what's going to happen - Claus getting everything he wants. He'll be the happiest kid in the world.

And I'm happy for him.

I stand up. "I'll leave the two of you to play or do whatever it is fathers and sons do. I have to go prepare dinner."

"Okay," Lance says.

I walk to the door. At the doorway, I glance over my shoulder and smile at the two of them laughing.

It's hard to believe, but from now on, it won't be just Claus and me. He won't have just me. He has a father now.

Funny. If Claus was a teenager, there would probably be a lot of drama going on right now, with Claus saying he didn't need a father or that he hated Lance. But right now, Claus is just happy to have Lance as his father.

Thank God.

~

"He really is such a darling, isn't he?" Lance says as he comes back to the kitchen after bringing Claus to bed. "Especially when he's sleeping."

I chuckle. "Yeah. I like watching him sleep, too, especially when he was a baby."

Lance pulls out a chair and sits. "How was he as a baby?"

"I believe I have pictures somewhere." I put the bowl I've just wiped inside the cupboard. "But wait. You said how, not what he looked like. Hmm. Let's see."

I touch my chin as I try to recall.

"He cried a lot during the first few months, wouldn't let me sleep. Maybe that's why I loved it when he was asleep, although I was also always afraid he'd wake up sooner than I hoped. And then the bawling stopped. When he started crawling, he'd crawl all over the place. He bumped his head a few times. And don't get me started about when he started walking."

Lance grins. "I can imagine."

I reach for another bowl. "I'm sure you can."

"I'm sorry I wasn't there."

The apology takes me by surprise.

"Well, you couldn't be because you didn't know," I tell him. "I chose to do it all alone, so..."

I shrug.

"It's amazing how you did everything by yourself," Lance says. "My mom thinks so, too."

My eyebrows arch. "Your mom?"

"I told her about Claus."

"Oh."

"By the way, I almost forgot..."

He gets off the chair and walks out of the kitchen. After a few moments, he comes back. He has a black satin box in his hand.

A satin box? My heart stops. Wait. It can't be...

He opens the box to reveal a pair of earrings.

Oh.

"My mom told me to give these to you. They're one of the first pairs she owned."

I throw Lance a puzzled look. "Why?"

He shrugs. "Maybe because she admires you so much. Or maybe she just wanted to give you something for Christmas."

"An early Christmas present?"

"Just like the one you gave me," he says.

I don't understand.

"You know, telling me about Claus and letting him know I'm his father," Lance explains.

"Right."

He gestures to the chair he was sitting on. "Please sit. I'll put them on you."

"Oh, you don't have to."

Lance pulls my arm. I set down the bowl I'm holding and sit down. I hold my hair back and he slips the earrings - flowers with a ruby center and emerald petals - on my ears. Then he steps back.

"They look great on you," he says with eyes brimming with admiration.

I blush as I touch the earring on my right ear. "Your mother is very kind."

I get up.

"Where are you going?"

"To see how they look in front of a mirror."

I go upstairs. Lance follows me.

I step inside the bathroom. He steps in after me and closes the door behind him.

"What are you doing?" I ask him.

He places his hands on my shoulders as I stand in front of the full-length mirror.

"I thought you wanted to see how you looked in front of the mirror."

He plants a kiss on the side of my neck.

A flurry of heat erupts in my chest.

"I said I wanted to see how the earrings looked."

"And you will," Lance whispers in my ear as his hands slide down my arms. "Just the earrings."

He licks the lobe of my ear. I shudder.

I place my hand over one of his. "I - "

The rest of my protest disappears inside his mouth as he kisses me. His other hand grips my chin. His tongue slips between my lips. The heat travels all the way down to my toes.

My eyelids fall shut. My hand slides off the back of his and drops to my side.

Once again, Lance gives me no choice but to surrender.

As I kiss him back, his fingers work on the front of my sweater. One by one, the small round buttons come undone. As he reaches the top, his hand brushes against one of my nipples and I gasp. I feel him grin against my lips.

He continues to kiss me as he pulls the sweater off my shoulders. It hangs from my arms. Then he reaches for the hem of the shirt I'm wearing underneath and starts rolling it up. He pushes it above my breasts, along with my bra, before pulling away.

My gaze darts to the mirror, at my breasts popping out beneath my clothes.

Lance cradles them both in his hands.

"Beautiful, aren't they?"

I look away. I'm too embarrassed to answer.

He licks my neck as he plays with my nipples. Blood rushes to my breasts. Heat swirls in them. A moan escapes my lips.

"No need to muffle your voice here," Lance says before kissing my neck. "Claus is asleep and the walls are thick."

He sucks on my neck as he rubs my nipples. I close my eyes and let out another moan as my back arches away from him. It bounces off the tiles.

My voice isn't all that's coming out. I can feel the strip of cotton between my legs growing damper and damper.

Finally, his fingers release the stiff peaks of my breasts and slide down to my belly.

"I wish I could have seen you when you were pregnant," Lance says as his finger circles my bellybutton.

I snort. "You would have been appalled by the sight of me."

"I could never be appalled by you." His hand strokes my belly.

I blush.

He pushes the elastic waistband of my pants and my underwear just past my hips. Then his hand dips beneath them. His fingers brush against my sensitive nub and then go all the way to the entrance of my molten core.

Two fingers slip inside me. I gasp as I throw my head back against his shoulder.

Lance grasps my chin again. "Look."

He forces my gaze towards the mirror and I see half lidded eyes looking back at me, eyes glossed over by lust and pleasure.

Is that... really me?

His fingers move in and out with a squelching sound. My eyes fall shut again as my body arches.

The hand on my chin slides back to my breast. The other moves faster and my moans spill out anew. My toes curl inside my socks. My knees quiver.

Then Lance stops. He goes around me and kneels between me and the mirror. His fingers part the folds of my skin and then his tongue darts out to delve between them.

I grab tendrils of his hair. My blunt nails rake across his scalp.

As he continues licking, my legs become unsteady. I place my hands on either side of the mirror and lean against the wall for support. That, however, brings my face closer to the glass, and I find myself staring into my own narrowed eyes, eyes that seem to be pleading for something.

I lift my chin and close my eyes. They roll to the back of my head as Lance licks me faster. My nails scrape against the tiles.

One more swipe of that wicked tongue and I begin to unravel. I let out a cry towards the ceiling as my body shudders. My toes dig into the floor.

When I look down as I catch my breath, Lance is still there, still licking. I push his head away.

He stands up and kisses me before I can catch my breath. I taste something sweet and tangy on his tongue.

Is that what I taste like? It makes me wonder how he tastes.

Lance pushes me back against the wall. I slide my sweater off my arms and let it fall to the floor. Then I take off my shirt and my bra and add them to the pile.

I take off his sweater and his shirt as well. I never have before. Now that I can see his bare chest, my eyes devour it. Then my fingers. My thumbs brush over his tiny nipples - well, tiny compared to mine - and then I trace every dip and curve of quivering, hard muscle.

I feel something else hard and quivering against my hip.

I free it from its confines and wrap my fingers around it. A grunt erupts low in Lance's throat.

I run my thumb across the tip and it catches on something sticky.

Lance gasps into my mouth.

He pushes my pants and my underwear further down. They drop around my ankles and I step out of them, onto them.

He lifts one of my legs. I look down and see his cock on the verge of entering me.

"Guide me inside you," he whispers.

And I do that. I rub the head of his cock against the drenched folds of my skin just for fun and then I slip it in. He pushes in the rest of the way and I wrap my arms around him as I gasp.

Lance kisses me again as he starts moving in and out of me. My back grinds against the cold tiles.

Then he pulls away.

"Hang on."

To what?

In the next moment, he lifts my other leg and hoists me up around his waist. I let out a cry of surprise as I wrap my arms and legs around him.

What on earth?

He grips my ass and continues to move. His cock reaches deep inside me and I feel myself grow even wetter around him. More moans escape my mouth.

I rest my head on his shoulder as my strength leaves me. All I can do now is cling to him as he pounds into my weakened body... and fill the bathroom with all the moans, gasps, cries and sloppy sounds I'm making.

"So?" Lance asks hoarsely, breathlessly. "Do the... earrings look... good on you?"

I look straight ahead and realize the mirror is still there. The earrings glisten on my ears, peeking out in between strands of my messy hair.

"Yes," I gasp.

But the earrings are not all I see. I see myself desperately clinging to Lance. I see my feet in the air.

How embarrassing.

And yet I can feel the pleasure in me mounting.

Lance pants in my ear as he moves even faster. His fingers dig into the cheeks of my ass.

I squeeze my eyes shut and tighten around him as the wave of pleasure comes again. He manages one more thrust before he shouts my name.

"Jordan!"

He throbs and spurts inside me. His grunts mingle with my fading moans.

Then he puts me down on top of the toilet. I feel his warmth leak out from between my thighs. He kneels on the floor in front of me as he catches his breath.

I touch his sweaty forehead. "Are you alright, Lance?"

Lance takes my hand and presses his lips to my palm. His eyes gaze into mine.

"I'm fine."

Then he reaches for my ear and runs his thumb over my new earring. His lips curve into a smile.

"They really suit you."

Again, fire burns in my cheeks. Staring at his face, at his flushed cheeks and at those eyes tenderly gazing into mine, my breath catches. My heart pounds.

It's weird, but here in this bathroom, with me naked and sitting on the toilet and Lance kneeling on the cold floor, I realize something for the first time.

I'm in love with Lance.