Chapter Two

Jordan

I thought this Christmas was going to be special.

I set my mug of hot chocolate down on my desk and slump in my chair. My arms hang limply from my sides and the pillow on my lap falls. As I pick it up, my gaze falls on the red and white dress I bought a few days ago, still sheathed in plastic and hanging on the wall.

I was supposed to wear that dress two nights from now to a Christmas concert, a date with my boyfriend, Arthur, before he went home for the holidays. I was going to give him a present after the date, too, maybe after we made out in front of the fire. But last night I found out that he was going out with someone else, an old friend of mine to boot. No wonder she hadn't been in contact with me, and no wonder it always felt like Arthur's mind was elsewhere.

I bet that's not all that's been elsewhere.

Let me guess. He probably started fucking her the day after I said I wouldn't let him do it to me right away.

I grit my teeth.

Men.

No. Boys.

Just then, my phone's ringtone pierces the miserable silence. I pick it up and glance at the screen, even though I already have an idea who's calling.

Arthur. No doubt he wants to apologize. Again.

Hasn't anyone told him it doesn't matter how many times he apologizes if not one of them is real? He's only sorry he got caught. Besides, no amount of apology can undo the past or the pain.

I can't forgive him. I won't.

As my phone rings again, my fingers tighten around it. I'm seized by the urge to throw it into the trash bin in the corner where Arthur's present already is, along with whatever feelings I had for him. Instead, I draw a deep breath and turn off the phone. Then I get off my chair, throw myself on top of my bed and stare at the pale pink ceiling.

I don't care if it's Christmas, the season of giving and forgiving. That asshole can rot in hell.

"Jordan?" The voice of my brother, Kevin, barges into my thoughts.

I sit up on the bed and hug the pillow to my chest. "Come in."

He enters with a wide, warm smile. It's that same smile that used to send me off in the mornings before I'd go to my school and he'd head over to his. It's that same smile that accompanied the pats on the head he used to give me as he congratulated me for winning another race or breaking another track record. It's that same smile he always shows me when he's wiping a speck of flour of my cheek and encouraging me to try baking one more time in spite of the disaster I've just experienced, the same one he gives as he munches on what I've baked, no matter how unsuccessful.

As always, no matter how rotten I'm feeling, I find myself smiling back.

Kevin stands close to the bed and looks around. "I didn't interrupt something, did I?"

"Just my thoughts on the best way to castrate someone," I answer.

His eyebrows furrow.

"Just kidding," I tell him. "Did you see the brownies I finally finished making?"

Kevin sits on the edge of the bed. "Yes. I tasted one of each kind, too. They're great. I especially love the hazelnut ones."

"I knew you would."

"And I'm sure my employees will love them." He reaches for my hand and squeezes it. "Thank you."

"You paid me for them, remember?"

He leans back. "And speaking of parties, are you sure you don't want to come to the office Christmas party tonight?"

I shake my head. "Nope."

Partying is the last thing I'm in the mood for.

"Oh, come on." He looks into my eyes. "Everyone will have their families with them. What will they think if their boss is all alone?"

"Don't do that. It's - "

I stop as I see the burn on my brother's arm.

I inspect it more closely. "What happened to you?"

Kevin pulls his arm away. "Nothing. Just a cigarette. I was clumsy."

I frown. "Maybe now you'll stop smoking."

"Maybe I'll consider it if you come."

I rest my head on the edge of the pillow in my arms. "You don't mean that."

"You know I only started doing it so I could mingle with my colleagues and my employees a bit more."

I raise my eyebrows. "And you don't need to do that anymore?"

"I'll find other ways."

I say nothing.

He nudges my shoulder lightly. "I hear the brownies at this party are the best in town."

"Of course they are," I tell him.

"Then will you come with me?"

I don't answer.

He tucks a loose strand of my hair behind my ear. "I know you don't feel like celebrating and all, Jordan, but it's Christmas and it only comes once a year."

"I wish it could be like old times. You know, with the whole family together."

"You mean with all our aunts and uncles and cousins?"

"Exactly."

"Well, there will be a lot of people at the party tonight," Kevin says. "It's just like a big family."

Just then, I hear a beep from the laptop on my bedside table. I glance at the screen, which tells me I have a new email, from none other than Arthur James.

Shit. I forgot that he has my email address, too.

The bed heaves as Kevin gets up.

"Well, I can't force you to come if you don't want to," he says. "I'm sure you've got better things to do. In fact, why don't you just give Arthur another chance? It's Christmas, after all."

I narrow my eyes at him. "You can't mean that."

Kevin shrugs. "If you'll forgive him, I will."

"And if not?"

"I could punch him for you the next time I see him. If I see him."

I grin. "That sounds better."

"Does it? Will that really make you feel better?"

I keep silent.

"You know what they say," he goes on. "The best revenge is to be happy. You're already making him suffer. Why should you suffer with him?"

He glances at the dress on the hanger. "Besides, it would be a pity to waste such a pretty dress."

I glance at it as well.

"But like I said, I'm not forcing you. I'll just - "

"Wait," I cut him off.

He stops just a foot away from the door and glances over his shoulder expectantly.

I let out a deep breath. "Fine. I'll go."

"Sure?"

I touch my neck. "You're right. It would be a waste not to wear the dress and to spend my holidays sulking. Besides, I want to see for myself how much your employees really love my brownies."

Kevin shrugs. "Fine by me."

"Consider it an early Christmas present," I add.

Again, that smile appears on his lips. Just like that, I know I've made the right decision.

"Then it seems like it's going to be a great Christmas."