Just an Illusion
As soon as we arrived to prep for the show, we hit the bar for a couple of pre-show drinks.
“I can’t believe this is our last gig at Just an Illusion,” Wyatt muses over his beer.
“That’s just sad,” Darren replies, tossing back a shot of tequila.
“What do you guys think of doing some shows here down the line? Just for fun, like back in the beginning. It would probably boost J’s bottom line too.” Noah glances between them to gauge their feelings.
“I’m not a charity case, Noah,” J grumbles.
“Calm down, J. This is more for us than you. You just get to reap the rewards. If you want us, that is.”
He pours me a shot of tequila. “You know you’re always welcome, all of you. I just don’t want to be part of your equation. Do this for you, not for me.”
“I’m in,” Darren says.
“Me too, wouldn’t miss it,” Wyatt answers.
“Are you going to invite me to come watch?” Warren asks, sounding sad.
“What the hell, Warren? You’re one of us, you better fucking be here!” Darren yells, and I understand his feelings completely. He’s sort of out of a job now that we’re not touring anymore. I know he’s looking forward to some down time and more time with Sam, but this affects him too.
“Sorry, guys, I’m feeling a little out of sorts. The label wants me touring with a new band next year, and Sam wants me to fully retire. I want to stay on in a limited role to manage you, but I’m not sure it’s possible.”
Warren knocks back his shot of tequila, and I clap him on the shoulder. “Do what makes you happy. Do you even want to keep touring?”
“With a bunch of newbies? Hell no, I’m too old for that shit. But the thought of not working at all and not working with you isn’t appealing.”
Noah nods at me, as do Wyatt and Darren, so I let him in on our plans. “Look, Warren, we’re done with the label. Even if we keep making music, we’re doing it on our own. We’re not touring, and with our fanbase and digital tracks these days, we’re going to put out our stuff on our own indie label.”
“And you were going to tell me this when?” he asks angrily.
“When it wasn’t a conflict of interest anymore,” Noah says.
I pick up where Noah leaves off. “You’ve always got a job with us. We want you to come work with us once we get everything up and running. It’s only an idea we’ve been tossing around the past few weeks. I mean, we’ve talked about it in a large abstract for a while, but now that our reality is changing, we need a game plan.”
“Huh.”
“Don’t be so gruff, old man. We love you, and you’re the glue that keeps us together. You have to come with us. We thought it would be a no-brainer.” Wyatt tosses his arm over Warren’s shoulder affectionately.
“You kids are a class act, you know that?”
“We’re far from kids now, Warren. I mean, fuck … I’m about to have one of my own.”
Warren smiles up at Darren. “You’ll always be kids to me. I’ve got more than twenty years on you guys. It’s funny … I remember when I used to tour with Joey and Iris and she found out she was pregnant with Mel. I was just a kid back then, basically a glorified PA, but Joey liked me, and he put me through my paces and helped me become who I am today. I owe a lot to that man. It’s strange how life comes full circle, isn’t it?”
We sit around shooting the shit for at least an hour or more, and it feels good. These are the times that make it all worth it.
“You guys ready to rehearse a bit?” Noah asks, and we all jump off our stools and head to the stage. Sitting on the stage here is like coming home.
We run through a few songs and everything sounds good. We’ve got this, and even though it’s being broadcast out to pretty much the whole world, we’re not going to get any better than we already are.
“Shit!” Noah is looking down at his phone, his face turning purple.
He jumps off his chair and storms toward J’s office, and we all scramble to follow. Something’s up.
“J, can I use your computer to check my email?”
Jordan rolls back in his chair, making way for Noah to use his computer. His knuckles are white as he grips the mouse and the edge of the desk. J moves out of the way and offers Noah his chair.
“What’s going on, Noah?”
“Jesus fucking Christ,” Noah mutters, collapsing in the chair, and we all gather around to see what the hell he’s reading.
Noah,
Tsk Tsk Tsk … I didn’t like spending my special day alone. I’m willing to forgive you, but you’ve given me no other choice but to take matters into my own hands.
Blood is red,
Murder divine,
Dead girlfriends can’t love you,
Soon you’ll be mine.
Until then, all my love.
~ Sara
My head is spinning. This is no longer vague, and she’s branching out to Mel, just like I thought she would. What’s going to stop her from targeting any of us? After Mel and Noah, Anna is probably next on her list.
Warren is immediately on the phone with the police while the rest of us stare at the monitor in disbelief.
Wyatt is the first to say anything. “How the hell did she get your email address?”
“I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore. Why can’t she leave us alone?” Noah stands and begins pacing the room. Stress pours off of him in waves, and I step behind Warren, who is sitting at the computer now, and read the words again and again.
Warren types rapidly before turning to us with the phone still to his ear. “I’m sending this to Tony, he’s coordinating with the police. They’re going to issue an emergency restraining order for Mel.”
Noah sighs and bends down to catch his breath. “Can we do that without telling her? I don’t want her to know.”
My head snaps up and my anger flares. No fucking way can he keep this from her. And he knows better anyway; the press will have the details minutes after the order is filed.
“You can’t hide something like this!”
He stares at me with a dare in his eye. “Why not? We’ll just tell her after the flowers they suggested it. I don’t want her scared for her life!”
Is he kidding me with this shit right now? Everyone is staring at the two of us, but from the looks on their faces, they’re just as outraged as I am.
I try reasoning with him. “We’re going to keep her safe.”
“And what if she chooses to leave the tour? What if she leaves me? We just need to keep the truth from her for a few days, until we’re back on the road. Please.” He’s begging, and I have sympathy for him, I do, but this is bigger than Noah. It’s bigger than us all.
“No, I’m not going to be a part of lying to her, Noah!” I shouldn’t be yelling, but I can’t believe he’s being so selfish right now.
“What good is it going to do her to know? Huh, Sawyer? Tell me, after everything that went down yesterday, how this is going to make it all better?” Noah comes closer and is screaming right in my face. He can take his rage out on me all he wants, but we’re not lying.
“Because she’s a fucking target now, that’s why! This isn’t just some vague note. It’s an obvious threat. Do you think Tony would already be working on an emergency restraining order for Mel now, too, if it wasn’t? What the fuck?!”
“He’s right, man,” Wyatt concurs, coming to my defense.
“Yeah, Noah. Dude, I love the fuck out of you, but if Mel’s a target, that affects Belle. They have to know. I’m not risking anything happening to my baby by keeping them in the dark.”
Noah drops into a chair and rubs his temple. “This was never supposed to happen. I gave Sara everything she could have wanted. Why couldn’t she just move on like any normal person?”
Belle and Mel walk into the office, and we all turn toward them. They look hot. There is so much I want to say to Mel right now and as our eyes lock, I wish she could see into my soul and know I’m not the one trying to keep things from her. It’s not my problem though; she isn’t my girlfriend. From the looks on their faces, they overheard us talking. Shaking my head, I point to Noah. “You two need to talk.”
The pain in Noah’s eyes is unmistakable. “You look beautiful,” he whispers.
“You look like hell,” Mel replies. “What did she do now, and why am I taking out a restraining order?”
He leads them to the computer like a defeated man. With his head down and his shoulders slumped, Noah is sadder than I’ve seen him in a long time. “I got this email when we got here. It’s already been forwarded to the police.”
Princess and Belle each read the email; it takes only a few seconds for the words to kick in.
“What the ever-loving fuck?!” Belle screams.
Mel, on the other hand, jumps into action. Princess is a fighter, and a determined one at that. Noah is practically frozen, afraid to step wrong when it comes to her, but I’m not. As she reaches for the keyboard, Darren, Wyatt, Warren, and I reach for it at the same time, forcefully pulling it from her grasp. She’s a feisty one, but no match for us.
I meet her determined glare with one of my own. “There is nothing you can say to make this better, Mel. In fact, anything you say will only make it worse … guaranteed.”
“I’m not afraid of her. Let that bitch bring the crazy train to town. I’ll throw her fucking ass off.” She’s practically feral as she goes off on me, and I swear I feel that underlying chemistry sparking. What she needs is to have her anger fucked out of her. What I wouldn’t give to be the one to do it too.
“Before you rip off your earrings, how about you take a deep breath and calm down,” Darren offers with a slight smirk.
“We should cancel the show,” Noah says suddenly.
Shit, now she’s pissed. I step back, giving them their space as she gives him a piece of her mind. “No … don’t you dare. If you do that, she wins, and she isn’t going to win. Tonight is about your family, your friends, and giving your fans something many of them will never be able to witness. Don’t let her take that from you … from them.”
“Mel’s right,” I agree, giving her a nod of approval. “Capitulating to Sara will show we’re weak. Even if we feel it, half the battle is not letting it show.”
Noah seems lost. He’s so afraid of losing her he can’t see the bigger picture. It’s part of what makes him one of the best men I know. No matter who you are, when Noah lets you into his heart, he’s all in.
“Fine,” he concedes. “The show goes on. Ryan, I want you and no less than three backup guards on Mel all night. And when I say on, I mean within eighteen inches of her.”
“Noah, that is ridiculous,” Mel protests, but he’s not having it. He’s finally taking charge.
“This is the deal, Mel, or I walk tonight. I’m not taking any risks, not with you.”
“Give him that, Princess, it’s a fair deal. Your safety, for his peace of mind … and ours.” The guys nod, agreeing with me.
She throws her arms in the air. “Fine, anything to get this night over and done with.”
Noah pulls her into his arms. “Thank you,” he whispers before lowering his lips to hers.
“You guys, I hate to break up the little moment you’ve got going on here, but it’s starting to fill up out there. We should go mingle and greet guests. This is still our party, even if it is a show,” Wyatt points out objectively.
Belle and Darren are huddled in the corner talking, and I need to excuse myself to call our parents. After the lashing I got on Thanksgiving, I don’t want to hold back anything else. Besides, they need to know I’m about to load them all up with security. At this point, no one is off limits.
Turning to Noah, I point to J’s storeroom. “Look, I’m going to call Dad and fill him in on everything before they all get here. Rob’s sister is supposed to watch the girls, and I want to make sure there’s a security team on her house too.”
“Do you think that’s necessary?”
Mel’s snarky tone pisses me off. “Do you think I want to take a single chance with my nieces?”
“Sorry … I’m so sorry,” she replies sincerely, and it calms me instantly.
“I know you are, Princess. We’re all just flying by the seat of our pants here.”
Warren waves his hand in the air to get our attention. “All right, you guys, Tony got the restraining order approved. We’re going to start about thirty minutes later tonight to allow a small buffer due to the increased security. You’ve got a good crowd out there already. Go have a drink and mingle. Act normal. Don’t let her know she’s frazzled you. And Mel,” he adds, “do me a favor and stay alert tonight. Have a drink but sip on it. Don’t let yourself get wasted, and don’t let your drink leave your sight. We can watch for Sara, but we don’t know if she has any accomplices. Just be safe.”
Shit, hearing him warn her sets my senses on high alert. Noah has every right to be worried. We can’t protect her from the stage. What he can do is watch her and everyone around her like a hawk. This bitch is not going to fuck with our family.
Everyone is settled at their tables, and Noah won’t stop throwing the evil eye at Eli. It’s funny in a way because Noah has always been such an easygoing guy. I’d have never thought jealousy would be his thing, but when it comes to Mel, all bets are off. On the flip side, Mel keeps glancing our way and looking at Noah with nothing but love and adoration in her eyes. I’m pretty sure she thinks he hung the moon and stars just for her.
“Noah, chill. She loves you.” I try encouraging him. Most people wish they had someone look at them the way Princess looks at Noah, and vice versa. They truly are a match made in heaven.
He pulls me to the side of the stage, all his vulnerabilities etched into his expression. “What if she realizes he’s the one for her?”
“Come on, do you hear yourself? Amelia Greyson is so in love with you it’s insane. There’s no way she’d leave you for anyone, let alone the man who broke her heart. You’re it for her.”
“You think?” he asks, calming a bit.
“Of course, but if you don’t, do something. Get all flowery and loving and show her how head over heels you are for her.”
“What about a song?”
With wide eyes, I take a step back. “You want to sing a solo?”
“Uh, well … want to might be a stretch, but she sort of fell in love with my voice in Vegas, and she knows I don’t like being the center of attention.”
I’m in shock. I’ve tried to get Noah to take the lead for years. We’re both equally talented, but our voices are distinctly different. We sound amazing together, but we also sound fucking phenomenal apart.
“You should do it. I’m down, even if it’s partially selfish. I’ve wanted this for you for a long time. It would also make this an even better show, and the fans will eat it up.” I don’t remind him this is being broadcast online for the world to see.
“Yeah,” he says, nodding, trying to convince himself. “Let’s do it. I want to do this for her. I want to give her the world.”
We huddle together with Wyatt and Darren and toss around song choices and when to do it. Once we have it all settled, Noah visibly relaxes.
“You know, I’m glad Noah said he wants to keep playing here because the thought of this being our last show here was really starting to fuck with me,” I confess.
“I thought it was just me being a sentimental pussy. I’m glad I’m not alone,” Darren chimes in.
“Nah, you’re definitely not alone. Even though I’m excited to come home and start my life with Anna, I’m going to miss the hell out of it all.”
Noah remains strangely quiet, and when he looks up, it’s with glassy eyes. “I’m going to miss everything about spending each day with the three of you. I’m hoping the only thing that will change is our hectic schedules. You guys are my brothers, my best friends, and that will never change.”
We rally together in a pre-show huddle and share our usual group hug. I remember the first time Mel saw us do it; she thought it was the sweetest thing. For us, it’s second nature, a brief moment in time where we can put our differences aside, put away the craziness of the day, and just be family. It’s also my favorite part of the day. No matter how much of a dick I am, no matter how much I screw things up, this ritual centers me, calms me in a way even my anti-anxiety medication never could.
After our last song, it’s time for me to lead Noah into his solo. I’m used to speaking off the cuff after years of performing live, but this is important to Noah; I hope I don’t fuck it up. I walk to the center of the stage, mic in hand, and do my best to speak from my heart.
“Over the years, we’ve written and performed more songs than we can count. And my brother Noah prefers to stay out of the limelight, never taking on lead vocals alone if he can help it. But recently, he met an amazing woman and fell in love.”
The crowd cheers and whistles, along with some of the romantics who “ooh” and “ahh” at my words.
“So it turns out he tried some romantic move on her and it backfired on him because she fell in love with his voice. And being the romantic man he is, Noah promised her more words sung by him.”
The crowd laughs, and Noah blushes under the stage lights. I have no doubt the bloggers are going to eat that blush up and make it a trending story.
“Now, he’s in a bit of a predicament because he wants to give her the world. So tonight, for the entire world to see, Noah is going to sing for his love, Amelia. Give it up for Noah, everyone.”
I take my seat again and look out at Mel’s table. Everyone is happy for them. Noah seriously has nothing to worry about. Even Eli can tell Mel and Noah are the real deal.
Noah clears his throat to get the attention of the crowd before speaking. “This was a decision made about five minutes after we got on stage tonight. If you noticed our pre-show huddle, this is what it was about. I hope you’ll excuse the cover song, but the words couldn’t express my feelings better. Amelia Grayson, this one’s for you, baby. I love you.”
I can’t tell if Mel is about to laugh or cry, but I’m not sure I’ve ever seen Princess look happier. Noah launches into a cover of “Make You Feel My Love” by Bob Dylan, and the crowd is riveted. Me, Wyatt, and Darren watch with rapt attention as we get a rare glimpse of Noah’s gift. If anyone should go solo, it’s him, and the crowd agrees. Once the last lyric falls from his lips, the room is submerged in stillness before the crowd stands and shatters the silence with thunderous applause. Even the three of us stand and clap. Noah was incredible.
Noah interrupts the applause, hating to be the center of attention for too long.
“Thank you all for indulging my romantic gesture. We’d like to thank you all for coming out tonight and for the love and support you’ve all shown us over the years. For those of you who aren’t aware, Just an Illusion is more than an album and a song title. It’s also the name of the bar we’re filming from tonight. This bar holds many memories for us, and we wouldn’t be where we are now without the chance we were given here. It only felt right to do this show here, where it all began. So please give a round of applause to my cousin Jordan for letting us invade once again. We love you, brother.”
Another round of applause breaks out as we all stand and wave our goodbyes. One by one the cameras begin to end the live feed, and we exit the stage. The performance is all they get; the after party with our family and friends is off limits.
Once we exit the stage, we’re met by quite a few of our new security team. This is a new normal I’m not going to get used to easily. Sara needs to be caught soon. Noah comes off the stage behind me, and I pull him into a massive hug.
“That was the shit! You kicked ass out there.”
“Thanks, Sawyer.” His voice is muffled because I’ve got him pulled so close to me. Chuckling, I release him.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to be so aggressive there.”
“It’s all good. Do you think Mel liked it?”
My mouth drops open, but I close it quickly. “Are you kidding me? Were her tears not evidence enough? Noah, not to be crude, but … go slide your hand up her skirt. I’m sure you’ll have the answer to that question.”
He laughs. “Jesus, Sawyer, a simple yes would have been good.”
“True, but then I wouldn’t have gotten the point across so well.”
Wyatt, Darren, and Warren come up and pull us both into a big group hug as they rave about Noah’s performance. If he weren’t so adamant about retiring, I’d love to get him to record some original music. Maybe I still can.
“All right, guys, as much as I’d like to chill with you, I need to find Mel and get her away from Eli.”
“Go get your girl, dude,” Darren replies and takes off probably to find Belle.
Wyatt and I follow them out, flanked by guards, and go find our families.