Present Day – Sawyer
Four Years After The Tour
“Sawyer,” Mel says, looking up at me from her computer with a stack of my journals spread around her.
“Yes, Princess?” Her smile still does things to me after all these years.
“I love you …”
I lean over and kiss her before she can complete that sentence. “I love you too.”
“But—”
“Ah, ah, ah,” I say, placing my fingers against her lips. “No buts. There are never any buts when it comes to our love. You love me … period.”
Princess nibbles on her bottom lip and laces our fingers together. “Always, it goes without saying. In this case, the but isn’t a bad thing. Unless you’re writing a book. One book, a very specific book.”
“What are you getting at, Mel?”
Her hazel eyes glimmer mischievously. “Darling husband of mine, you are loquacious as fuck. This isn’t going to be one book, Sawyer. It was never going to be one book, no matter how much you thought you could cram everything in.”
“Why not? Seems pretty straightforward to me. It’s my story this time. Is there a law that says a book can’t be long?”
I love the look she gets when she’s thinking. I wanted to put my thoughts and words into book form; she’s the one who insisted it has to be an actual book. She places her computer on the floor, followed by all the notebooks, and tucks herself into my arm, right where she belongs.
“Not a law per se, but there are binding issues once you reach a certain word count and we’re just about there. This is your story, not for public consumption, but I still want it next to mine on our shelves.”
“Why is this so important to you?”
She flashes my favorite smile, the one that tells me even after all these years I still make her happy. “Because the sum of my story and your story equals our story. And it’s always been our story, Sawyer.”
The love in her eyes melts my heart, but her words soothe my soul in that place it aches every great once in a while. “Okay, Princess, but it’s not going to be three. I love you, and that will never change, but I’m also not the only loquacious one in this marriage.”
She laughs, and I feel one of the babies kick against me when she does. I immediately drop my hand to her belly. The look of adoration she gives me when I do melts my heart and hardens my cock at the same damn time.
Her fingers circle mine as she looks up at me. “I know, baby, and I promise I’ll get the rest into one book so we’ll have a trilogy and a duet that span the course of the tour and after.”
“Maybe someday Nate will write a solo story about his life.” My words surprise me. Nate seems like a born entertainer, but he could take after Mel and become a writer. Or maybe he could do both.
She sighs. “If he does, I hope he has a wonderful story to tell.”
Me too. “He will, Princess. With you and Noah as his parents, his life will be great.”
“Hey … stop that. I know converting your journal to book form has been difficult for both of us, but you’re Nate’s dad, too, Sawyer. Any greatness he has will be a reflection of us all.”
The sincerity in her words astounds me. There are still moments when I feel unworthy of their love and of being the one who gets to raise Nate in Noah’s absence. But at times like these, when I’m overwhelmed by her love and support, I know I’m the luckiest man alive.
“How are you doing right now? I know it’s been hard for you to do this again. You didn’t have to, you know.”
“I wanted to do this for you, with you, because it’s important to you. And I’m okay. It was hard at first, and I’m sure I’ll still have my moments, especially on round two, but it’s …”
“It’s what, Princess?” I whisper, before taking her lips with mine. Our tongues meet eagerly as we lose ourselves in each other for the briefest of moments.
She sucks in a breath since she’s a bit oxygen deprived lately with the two little ones crowding her diaphragm. “It’s pretty amazing, actually. I gazed over your journals before when you were cleaning them up, and when you showed me things here and there, but reading them fully … it’s enlightening.”
“Enlightening, huh?”
“Don’t tease me. I’m learning so many things I didn’t know about you and how much you went through. About Noah and how hard things were between the two of you at times, but part of me is envious.”
“Of what?”
She rubs her belly and looks up at me. “It doesn’t matter how hard things got, the two of you talked about it. Maybe not right away, or all at once, but you both knew you’d still be there no matter what you said to each other. I hope these babies of ours have the kind of bond you and Noah did. It’s so special, Sawyer. I’ve never seen anything like it.”
I pull her into my lap so she’s sitting between my legs. This way I can rub her belly and shoulders, but she can’t see my face. I’m emotional about it all right now. “I’ve got a lot of regrets, Mel. Our bond was special, but I wasn’t a very good brother toward the end.”
“Baby, that’s just not true.”
“Come on, Mel, you can’t read those pages and tell me my actions were those of a loving brother.”
She locks her hands on top of mine and leans all the way into me. “You know what I see on those pages? Two brothers who loved each other so much they were willing to sacrifice love. As much as you were hurting, you still helped Noah, made sacrifices for him, never told him to back off. And Noah, he may not have said so in as many words to us, but he told Anna he would have been happy for us if I chose you. We lost him way too soon, and Noah will always and forever be a part of me, just like he’s a part of you. But we survived, Sawyer. We fought through the darkness and made it into the light together. It wasn’t easy, and at times it can still be hard, but the two of us are in this together. Forever.”
With a kiss to the top of her head, I inhale the scent of her shampoo while gathering my thoughts. There isn’t much else to say. “I’d be lost without you.”
She tilts her head back and captures my lips with hers. “And I without you. Now, let me tell you what I looove about your book.”
I laugh at the way she drags out the word love. “Tell away.”
“You and Belle. I know you mentioned you guys were friends, but I always took it with a grain of salt. I never really realized you guys were friends. Belle, that sneaky bitch, God rest her soul, never let me in on that secret! But I love it. Oh God, Sawyer, do I love it more than anything right now. My best friend, my sister, she knew you, and she loved you. And not only that, she gave you her blessing. You have no idea how much knowing that means to me.”
“You needed Belle’s blessing?”
“No, silly, of course not, but knowing she gave it anyway … I can’t even explain the feeling that came over me. Nate isn’t going to be the only one learning from your side of the story. Cadence is going to get to see a whole other side of her mom through your eyes. I love it, Sawyer, I really do, and I can’t wait to pick up tomorrow right where I left off and finish it.”
She seems happy, but I think she’s got a bit of pregnancy brain going on. “You do realize you’re about to get into the sad stuff? And you’re pregnant, maybe we should wait until after the babies come to pick up.”
“Ha! You’re so cute. Do you think I’m going to have time to write anytime soon? We’re going to have four kids, five including Cady. I may not have given birth to her, but that girl is just as much mine as Nate is yours.”
Not too long after our wedding, Darren finally had the mom talk with Mel. Man, I was not prepared for the amount of tears that conversation brought on. In the end, he asked Mel to be a mother figure to Cady, which was already a given but his words just about broke Mel apart.
“Princess, can we move on to the entertainment portion of the evening now?”
All the kids are asleep, and our time could be much better spent having sex.
“What did you have in mind?”
I pull her earlobe between my teeth and bite. “I want to do dirty things to you.”
“My pregnant body isn’t gross to you yet?”
“Are you fucking kidding me? Your body, pregnant or not, should be worshipped by me at all times.”
She sighs softly as I work my lips down her neck. “I thought you wanted to do dirty things to me.”
My cock pokes her from behind, and she moans as she presses against it. “Oh, I do, but I can worship your body like a temple and desecrate it all at the same time.”
“Promise?” she pants as she writhes against me.
“Absofuckinglutely.”