Chapter Twenty-Five

“There’s something different about you, love.” Gelaire eyed me from across the table.

We were near her home, grabbing lunch at a cozy little café that made the best grilled cheese and vegetable sandwiches before I took her to the market. It was Wednesday, a day later than normal. Tuesday I’d stayed in the office since Avery was out all day celebrating the life of her daughter and mourning her death. I’d shed my share of tears, too.

For a second, I thought about the conversation I’d had last night with Reed about Hannah. He was a great listener. He laughed with me at the silly and sweet things Hannah did, like painting James’s toe nails. That little girl had her daddy wrapped around her finger. Neil would have just zoned out after a while. He acted as though after Hannah’s funeral was over, I should have been over it. But he had never put in a lot of effort to be a good uncle. Which was unfortunate, because I loved being an aunt. And Hannah, being my only niece, held a special place in my heart.

I tucked some of my curls behind my ear and responded to Gelaire’s comment. “I’m trying out this new styling spray for my hair that’s supposed to add sheen and keep away the frizz.”

She grinned. “Your hair looks lovely as always, but that’s not what I was referring to.”

I took a sip of my ice water. “I’m wearing makeup again.”

“It’s more than physical. You seem . . . happy.”

“I’m getting there, depending on the moment.”

“Are you seeing someone?”

I set my glass down. Heat flooded my cheeks. “Why would you jump to that conclusion?”

Gelaire’s green eyes sparkled with a hint a mischief. “My son,” she was still saying his name with some derision, “mentioned you left him a message about replacing him. I told him I would gladly help you.”

She always knew how to get me to smile. “I appreciate that, but I made that call in anger. It wasn’t my finest moment.”

“He deserved it. You have him worried, you know.”

“What about?”

“That he’ll soon be a distant memory.”

“Honestly, I wish that could happen, but Cody will connect us forever.” I shrugged. “Well, maybe.”

Her eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”

I felt like I was tattling. “Neil still hasn’t seen Cody. It’s been weeks now. They haven’t even talked.”

Outrage filled her features. Red blotches of anger popped up on her cheeks while her fists balled. “I will be having words with my son. Again.”

“You don’t need to do that.”

“I most certainly do. I didn’t raise him to be this kind of man. His father most certainly didn’t.” She took some deep breaths to try and calm herself. “How’s Cody handling it?”

“Not well. He’s keeping it bottled up inside. He says he hates his dad, but it’s only because he loves him so much.” Tears stung my eyes.

Gelaire reached for my hand. “I will right this. Why don’t you bring Cody over to spend the weekend with me? He needs to know that the Higgins side loves him.”

I wasn’t sure how Cody would feel about that. He loved his grandma, but she wasn’t into the kind of things Cody was. And the naked statue in her foyer, while funny to him, kind of freaked him out. But it would free me up for Saturday night. Though I wouldn’t put Cody up like some sacrificial lamb so I could go out with his coach.

“Please?” Gelaire begged when I didn’t answer right away.

“I’ll talk to Cody, but promise you won’t spring Neil on him without asking Cody first, if that’s your plan.”

She squeezed my hand. “I give you my word. I only want my grandson to know he means the world to me. Maybe I can take him to a Cubs game or something.”

“You hate baseball.”

“Cody loves it, so I’ll love it.”

Knowing her, she would get the box seats where they would be waited on hand and foot. “He would love that.”

“Then it’s settled. Do you think he would like box seats?”

What did I tell you? “Who wouldn’t?”

“Would you like to come too, love?”

“Uh, I think it would be good if only the two of you went.” That was true. Really, it was.

“I think you’re right. We will have a grand time.”

The fact that she said grand made that questionable. Cody wasn’t used to grand times.

~*~

Saturday I found myself driving a reluctant Cody into the city. He was tired from the late night at the away game and getting up early to serve pancakes at the fundraiser this morning. It didn’t help that he was cranky with me for setting up the visit with his grandma, and he hadn’t gotten any playing time last night. The game was a nail biter, and the Panthers only won by a field goal. Neil was a no-show again. That made Cody going to see Gelaire even more important. He needed those family connections, whether he saw the value in them or not. Someday he would be grateful. I hoped.

“You have to be at least a little excited about the game tonight.” I glanced at my son slouched in the passenger seat. I wasn’t brave enough to let him drive in downtown Chicago yet. Not sure I ever would be.

He stared out the window and shrugged.

“Come on, box seats. And you know Grandma will want to buy you a new jersey and probably anything they’re selling there.”

“I’m missing a party at Rory’s tonight.”

More reasons for me to be happy he was going to be at his grandma’s. “There will be other parties. And if you want you can have her over to watch a movie or something next weekend.” You better believe I would be out there the entire time.

“Maybe.”

“Cody, this is a good thing.”

“Her house smells weird and she listens to old music.”

“It smells like lavender, which is nice. And if you ask, she would probably turn off the music or let you choose. She loves and misses you.”

“Is Dad going to be there?” I heard both the hope and resentment in his voice.

“I don’t know. How would you feel if he was?”

His only answer was to shrug and throw in his earbuds.

I reached over and patted his leg and shouted, “I love you.”

I saw a hint of a smile.

The rest of our drive was quiet. It gave me too much time to worry about my date. I hadn’t gone to the pancake breakfast this morning because I feared people would be able to tell by the look on my face that I had a date with the coach.

And, last night at the game, something weird happened. A few of the other moms crowded around me like we were back in high school. They linked arms with me and everything. To top it off, they still had perky cheerleader voices. And get this. Their names were Kerry, Karen, and Katrina. It was very Stepford-wife-ish. They invited me to their book club and asked if maybe I could post about it on my blog and Facebook page. They said it could be, like, a “thing” I do. Then they went on to give me false flattery about how funny I was and how they loved my posts. I felt like they wanted to assimilate me. More like use me. It was nicer than the mean moms who’d slighted me last week. Last night they made sure to give me those fake who-do-you-think-you-are smiles.

I didn’t even recognize my life anymore. I used to be one of those moms that played in the background. I helped out whenever I could, but I was never in charge of anything. I had friends, but never a large circle. My closest friends were always family, especially Avery.

But now I had this large following and people that were vying for my attention in both positive and negative ways. Did I mention I had a date with my son’s coach? I didn’t even know what I was going to wear, other than something casual, per Reed’s instructions. I kept thinking I might back out. But then I would think about my phone conversations with Reed during the week and how much he was looking forward to it.

I also had some creepy messages to deal with from random men on Facebook after I’d put up my new picture. One guy offered to be my love slave. What? Ew. I had been doing a lot of blocking people this week.

But one perk was that Autumn Moone was going to have her publisher send me and my sisters-in-law advanced copies of A Black Night in November. A full month before it released in December. Avery and I might have squealed over it. Delanie acted mildly excited about it, as in she mentioned that it was nice I had asked for a copy for each of us. I still wished I knew who sent Autumn Moone that original post. I felt like it was too gutsy to ask Autumn. She obviously valued her anonymity. I couldn’t say I blamed her.

Saturday traffic wasn’t horrible, and before I knew it, I was dropping off my son at Gelaire’s Greystone. By the look on Cody’s face, you would have thought I was dropping him off at prison. His grimace said, shoot me now.

“It’s only one night, and maybe if you’re lucky you’ll meet someone famous tonight sitting in the box seats with you.”

His face scrunched the way it always did when he wasn’t buying what I was trying to sell.

“If you smile and pretend like you enjoy your time, I may be willing to bribe you with that new video game you’ve been wanting.”

His lip twitched. “The deluxe version?”

“For that, your grandma better think that you love every second of being with her.”

“Will you pick me up early tomorrow?”

“Does that mean we have a deal?” I held out my hand for him to shake on it.

He was quick to take it. He’d been wanting that game for several weeks now. I’d been saving it for a moment like this. I had learned a few tricks over the years, and I was not above bribing him.

“I love you. I’ll miss you.” I held his hand tight. “Be a good boy,” I teased.

He rolled his eyes.

“Oh, and don’t let grandma drink at the game. She might start talking about your grandpa—probably about things you don’t need or want to know.”

Cody’s eyebrows shot up to his tousled hair.

“I’m sure she’ll be fine.”

The question was, would I?