Chapter Forty-Seven

We were dashing through the snow, but in Reed’s jeep, not a one-horse open sleigh. The weatherman was partially right—we got a foot of snow, but a day later than predicted. It did add something to the Christmas Eve holiday, but it made driving downtown a pain. Thankfully, Reed’s jeep had four-wheel drive.

I turned back to talk to Cody, but took a moment to stare at him first. I thought back to a couple of days ago when I’d shown up at our house with Reed carrying in our groceries. Cody’s brown eyes went from happy to see his coach to confused as to why he was at our house and why he’d walked in through our garage door. I think some terror showed up when Reed asked to speak to him. Maybe he thought he was in trouble at school. They sat down on the living room couch together. I sat on the coffee table so we were all close. Cody looked between Reed and me, not sure what to make of it.

I started off. “I know this has been a rough year for us and a lot of things have changed. But not all change is a bad thing.” I smiled at Reed.

Reed took that as his cue. “Cody, I care about you and your mother.”

Cody tilted his head.

Reed reached for my hand.

Cody’s eyes bulged.

“I’d like your permission to date her.”

I held my breath, waiting to see what my son would say.

Reed, on the other hand, took Cody’s hand. Neil had never done that, at least not since Cody was small.

“Cody, I can only imagine how hard it might be to see your mom date, but I promise you, I’ll take good care of her and you, if you’ll let me.”

Tears filled my eyes.

Cody looked down at his and Reed’s hands. I could tell he thought it was weird, but his lip twitched, then a full-blown smiled appeared. “You guys aren’t going to embarrass me, are you?”

“We might,” Reed answered. “But we’ll do our best to keep it to a minimum.”

Cody nodded, but he gave Reed a I-mean-business-stare. “Don’t hurt my mom.”

“You have my word.”

And that was that. They ended up playing video games while I made lunch. One of the best days ever.

I focused back on the here and now. It was a good thing to do. I smiled at my son sitting in the backseat. “You look sharp.”

He flicked some lint off his black dress pants. “Do we have to stay long?”

“Define ‘long.’”

“Ugh.”

“I’m with you,” Reed agreed with Cody.

For a brief second, I rested my hand on Reed’s leg. I wasn’t sure how much affection to show Reed in front of Cody yet. Cody had given his stamp of approval, and if I’d been reading him right the last couple of days, he liked the idea of Reed and me. But I still wanted to tread carefully. This was new for all of us.

“I didn’t make you come,” I said to Reed. Though I was happy he was. Gelaire was downright tickled I was bringing him to Christmas tea.

“You made me,” Cody complained.

Reed chuckled before taking my hand. He couldn’t hold it long because of the snow and slick roads, but if felt good all the same. He felt good. The last couple of days had been perfect. We spent the days playing board games with Cody and making and eating lots of food. Nights after Cody went to bed were spent wrapped up in his arms, sipping wine in front of my fireplace. We weren’t just sipping wine, but whether we were or not, I was still tasting it and gasping. Lots of gasping.

Honestly, I worried less about having Reed with us at Gelaire’s than I did at my parents’. I hadn’t told them yet. I thought telling them in person would be better. My siblings all knew. Avery screamed in my ear over the phone over it. James roared like a cougar, teasing me because I was older than Reed. Our night was sure to be fun, or was it we were sure to be made fun of? I was going with both. Reed made everything fun. Even shoveling snow. He helped Cody and me clear our sidewalks and driveway this morning, but it turned into a snowball fight. It was good to see Cody smile and laugh through his frozen cheeks. We consumed a gallon of hot chocolate afterward.

Now here we were, getting ready to announce our coupledom to my ex and his family, my family. Well, Gelaire. Roxie would never be part of my family. Farrah I would have affection for because she was my son’s sister. Though I wasn’t ready to hold her. I was still mourning that she wasn’t mine. And that was okay. I wasn’t wallowing, just working through it; ask my journal.

We parked in front of Gelaire’s Greystone. I was disappointed not to see Neil’s car. Not because I wanted to see him, but for Cody’s sake. He had been making an effort, and I’d hoped that would continue.

Reed came around and got my door while Cody headed in. Snow swirled in the air. The storm was heavier closer to the lake. He leaned in and pressed his lips hard against mine. “Are you ready for this?”

“I think so. Are you?”

“Oh, yeah. I’ve been waiting for this moment since I was fifteen and watched that loser marry you.”

I kissed him. “Be nice.”

“I plan on being very nice . . . to you.”

“How nice?”

“So nice, I might make it on Santa’s naughty list.”

I pushed against his chest and giggled. “Stop it.”

He brushed my lips. “For now.”

I took a deep breath. “Let’s do this.”

He grabbed my hand and helped me out, taking the bag of gifts I had for Gelaire and the ones I made Cody buy for his dad and sister. On the way in, Reed shielded me with his coat, doing his best to keep the snow off me. Even with the frigid temperatures and flakes of white, I felt warm. Warmer and lighter than I had in a long while.

When we entered Gelaire’s home, I was surprised to see Neil already there holding a baby wrapped in a pink fleece blanket in his arms. How did he get here? Cody stood near him, smiling at the precious bundle with blond wisps of hair.

My heart hiccupped, but then I looked between the two men who were in a serious showdown of stares. It struck me how different they were. Neil would have never agreed to come with me under the circumstances. He never shoveled the snow or had a snowball fight with his son. Reed always thought of others, and Neil, for most of our time together, thought of himself. Maybe the infant in his arms would change that; that would be good for him. But I was finding I didn’t have to let how he behaved affect me. I had a choice, like Peter said. And I had to actively choose how to feel about each situation. Today, I was choosing to be happy with Reed by my side.

Gelaire came sweeping down her spiral staircase in a red velvet gown that screamed style and Christmas. Christmas in a castle, that is.

“Did we underdress?” Reed whispered in my ear.

I shook my head. I would explain later—this was just Gelaire.

“Love, you made it. I was worried with the weather.”

I took Reed’s free hand. “We had a good driver.”

“Handsome too, I see.”

I looked up into Reed’s smiling eyes. “Yes, he is.”

Gelaire approached and held out her hand. “Gelaire Higgins, mother-in-law to the sweet thing you hold.”

Reed set down the bag of gifts and shook her hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you. Sam speaks highly of you.”

Gelaire kissed my cheek. “Merry Christmas, love.” She turned her sights to Cody. “Come kiss your grandmother.”

Cody did his best to smile on his walk over. He had to lean down now to kiss her cheek.

“I do believe there are some gifts waiting for you under the tree. Shall we retire to the sitting room?”

I couldn’t wait to see her tree. She never decorated it the same, but it was always worthy of a Christmas card or storefront window.

The awkward moment came when we realized we would have to converse with Neil. I took the lead.

“Neil, I don’t know if you remember Reed. He was a friend of Peter’s growing up. Now he’s Cody’s coach.” I wanted to add in that he was mine too, but I figured that was obvious by the way he was glued to my side.

Neil continued to look him over with a raised eyebrow. Not only were they dissimilar in disposition, but in looks as well. Despite Neil’s attempts to look younger, the over ten-year difference was apparent. Reed had a youthful glow and was lean and muscular. He was the kind of guy that if you saw him walking down the street, you would take a second, third, and fourth look. You might even track him down and get his number. Neil, on the other hand, was handsome in that professional stature sort of way. The hair plugs hadn’t helped. I was happy to see him back in khakis and a button-up. It was much more him.

I appreciated Reed extending his hand. “It’s nice to see you again,” he lied. But it was a good lie. “Cody is a great kid and fantastic player. He’s going to be my starting quarterback next year.” Reed smiled at Cody.

Cody’s face exploded with a burst of happiness. Reed just gave him—and me—the best gift ever. Nothing was better than seeing my son happy.

Neil shifted his daughter so that he could reciprocate, though it was obvious he didn’t want to. His eyes were filled with contempt for Reed. “Cody is a great kid. I look forward to his games next year.” He shook Reed’s hand.

He better mean what he said and show up.

That exchange was pretty much how the afternoon went. Reed was pleasant and attentive to both Cody and me, even Gelaire. He cleared the dishes after tea, which was just a fancy name for lunch. He also helped pick up the torn wrapping paper. Neil attended to Farrah and watched. I hoped he was taking lengthy notes. I hoped Cody did too. Reed was the kind of man I wanted Cody to be like when he grew up. That thought settled into my soul. And with that, some of the darkness dissipated. Some of the hold Neil still had on my heart vanished.

We had survived our first family event. Now, for dinner, we were on to the insane asylum . . . I mean, my parents’. Cody was more animated on our drive there, talking to Reed about the team and his plans for conditioning in the off season. Cody also liked my parents’ place more because that meant Matt and Jimmy would be there, and he knew he would leave with a wad of cash from Mimsy. While he loved Gelaire, he left her house with cardigans and Shakespeare’s full collection. Those were going to get a lot of use on his floor. At least Neil got him something he really wanted—the latest and greatest smartphone.

The roads were terrible. It was slow going, but I didn’t mind one bit. I liked the cozy feel of the three of us in Reed’s car. There was something right about it all. That lovely feeling all ended when we pulled up to my parents’ place. It was now dark out, and the snow was tapering off. I loved snowflakes at night. On Christmas Eve, there was something magical about it. Or was it the man who was holding my hand?

“Cody,” I stopped him before he hopped out. “Your grandparents don’t know about Reed yet, so mum’s the word until we get in there.”

Cody’s eyes lit up with mischief, just like someone else I knew when he was fifteen. “This is going to be fun.” He exited, laughing.

Reed laughed too.

“That’s not the word I would use,” I grumbled.

“What word would you use?”

“Nothing my mother would approve of.”

“Would she approve of this?” His warm lips landed on mine. They lingered for a bit before his tongue anxiously parted my lips, making me wish we could stay a little longer. My hands decided we should anyway and delighted themselves by running through Reed’s hair. He groaned and kissed me deeper, only to pull away too soon.

He let out a deep breath of content. “We’re not leaving if we keep doing that.”

“Okay.”

“Don’t tempt me.”

“Are you sure?” I grinned playfully.

“No, but I want your parents to approve of me, so we better go.”

“If we must. Let me apologize right now for anything my family may say.”

“I’m kind of looking forward to it.”

“You know they’re going to ask you if we’re sleeping together.”

He wagged his eyebrows. “How do you think they’ll react when I tell them we’ve slept together twice now?”

My mouth dropped open. “That lie will cost you.”

“I’m not lying. You’ve fallen asleep in my arms the last two nights.”

And it had been amazing, but not as amazing as my parents would take it. “We should probably keep that to ourselves.”

“Now we’re back to sneaking around?” he teased.

“Only if you want me to keep falling asleep in your arms.”

“My lips are sealed.” He pretended to zip them up. “Repeat tonight?”

“If we survive dinner and mass, I’m all yours.”

“I guess Santa finally got my letter.”

“You asked Santa for me?”

“Every year.” He pecked my lips.

The moment of truth arrived. We walked in hand in hand, holding a bag full of gifts that had tags from Samantha, Cody, and Reed, in addition to the oranges I needed to make my rolls.

Reed gave my hand a little squeeze before we headed back into the fire.

“Samantha Marie, is that you?” Ma called out.

“Yes, and Reed too.”

We paused, waiting.

Ma walked out of the kitchen and stared down the hall to the foyer. She laser-focused on our clasped hands. “Joseph! Joseph! Come here.” That urgent call had the whole family coming, minus Delanie and Peter. My heart ached, knowing they weren’t here. But I didn’t have time to dwell on it, being a target for the firing squad.

The entire motley crew stared at us. Some were shaking with laughter, aka James and Avery. Matt and Jimmy were looking at Cody to see what he thought about it.

Mimsy bounced on the balls of her feet shaking her head. “Adultery.” She left, no doubt to get some water. I should have seen that one coming.

Ma edged closer, wiping her hands on her apron. “What do we have here, Samantha Marie?”

Dad followed behind her, waiting to see how she was going to react before he did.

I stepped forward with Reed, squeezing the life out of his hand. “Someone who makes me very happy.”

Ma gave Reed an appraising look, her eyes narrowed, lips pursed together. She eventually nodded. “See that you keep it that way, Reed Cassidy.”

“Yes, Mrs. D.”

“I need help in the kitchen, Samantha Marie.” She turned without another word.

“I’m coming.” I stood on my tiptoes and kissed Reed’s cheek. “I think that’s what we call a Christmas miracle,” I whispered.

It wasn’t the only miracle of the night.

Reed and I sat behind my parents and Mimsy during mass. Their stares throughout dinner had become too much. I think they hardly ate for all their staring. And I needed to keep an eye on Mimsy. There was holy water in our presence, so there was no telling what she would do. Cody sat on the other side of Reed. I didn’t mind. I was happy he was comfortable there. Avery, James, and their boys sat behind us.

While we listened to the organist play a beautiful rendition of Adeste Fideles, Delanie and Peter walked in to my surprise. We slid down our pew to make room for them. Ma turned around and locked eyes with her son, but she said nothing.

Peter sighed and took Delanie’s hand. Delanie looked uncomfortable as she looked around at all the people and the ornamentally decorated church with stained-glass windows and low lighting. The only light source was the flickering candles on the old golden carved candle sticks. To me it was cozy and welcoming. But for Delanie, I swore I saw a hint of fear in her eyes. I wondered why. It was a question for another day.

I took Peter’s free hand, emotion flooding me. “I’m so happy you came,” I whispered.

Peter squeezed my hand before acknowledging Reed. “I’m glad to see you finally took my advice.”

This was news to me. I leaned into Reed. “When did Peter talk to you?”

“A few days ago.”

“And what did he say?”

Reed kissed my head and whispered in my ear, “That I was a jerk and James knows people who will dispose of dead bodies.”

I laughed a little too loud.

“They’re probably talking about sex,” Mimsy said way too loud to Ma. “Have you seen his butt?”

Wow. Just wow.

Stares multiplied our way. I swore the organ quieted.

Ma whipped around. “Have you given him your NDA, Samantha Marie?”

If I could have slinked under the pew or vanished, I would have. Everyone was now looking at us. The organ music all but ceased. Cody actually did slide down and moved away from us. If only I could have.

Ma’s eyes demanded an answer while Dad shook his head, probably wishing he drank more at dinner.

“No, Ma.”

She huffed out a breath. “Keep it that way.”

But as embarrassing as that all was, that’s when the miracle happened. Ma turned to Delanie and Peter. “We’re having dessert after. I made your favorite, cinnamon pie.” It wasn’t what most of us considered an apology, but it was the best we could hope for from Ma.

Peter rested his hand on Ma’s. “We’ll be there.”

I caught the tears in Ma’s eyes before she turned around.

“Forgiveness is an action,” Peter whispered in my ear.

And Reed whispered in my other, “About that NDA.”