Sixteen

Max

I knew sitting here in the middle of the poolroom that this was a bad idea. I spent the day trying to ignore the pull to Allison. I picked up my phone over a hundred times and wanted to text her to come over. But I couldn’t do it. I knew that if she came over I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from doing what I’ve wanted to do for a month now. Bury my hands in her hair and kiss the shit out of her. I don’t even care anymore. I fucking want her, but every time I try and feel her out, she looks down and ignores me.

So I showed up at the bar Denise is letting loose for once and I was drinking my bottle of water when Shannon walked in and I groaned inwardly. I really don’t want this right now. I’m sitting on a stool next to the table as she makes her way over to me.

“Hey there, stranger.” She leans in and kisses my cheek, and her perfume almost makes me gag. And I swear I feel my cock duck for cover. I smile at her and see that her makeup looks like it’s caked on. Why the fuck is she so made up? “What a nice surprise.” She dumps her purse on the stool behind me.

“Yeah, it won’t be a late night. I have practice tomorrow at nine.” I don’t but just want to draw the line before she thinks other things. “My turn,” I say, getting up and aligning the shot and missing. I shake my head and stand instead and for the next hour, I stay on one side of the room, and when she walks away, I finally go and sit down. I’m not even in my seat for a second when she comes prancing back in. She holds what looks like a martini glass and sits it on the table next to me.

She stands in the middle of my legs. “So when are we going to finally meet up?”

“I have no idea. My travel schedule is crazy for the next couple of months.”

“Surely you have one night available,” she says and Denise screams out, “You came.”

I look over as Shannon turns around and leans on one leg, so I put my hands on her hips to not make her push my leg. I see Allison and my heart stops. She’s so fucking beautiful the whole room dims to her. And here I am after ignoring her all day with a girl draped all over me. She doesn’t make eye contact with me as I watch her, waiting for her to look at me. Waiting to see if there is something there, and that I’m not just imagining this whole thing.

Denise comes over with her, she introduces her to Shannon, and I see the flicker in her eye as she remembers the name. I try talking to her, but she goes with Denise and for the next couple of hours people keep coming in and she’s passed around like she’s a fucking piñata at a birthday party. I finally ply Shannon from me as she goes to talk to a couple of friends from the hospital. I spot Denise in the corner talking to a guy that I saw when I went for breakfast.

“Hey, where is Allison?” I ask her and look around.

“She took off,” she says and then turns back to talk to the guy.

“What do you mean she took off?” I think it came out harsher than I thought it would.

“She said she has an early morning so she left.”

I walk out of the bar, looking left and right for her and come up empty-handed.

Just then, Shannon comes running out. “Oh my God, I thought I missed you.”

I don’t have time for this, but I also don’t have the energy for her. “Listen, Shannon, it’s not going to happen,” I tell her, grabbing her shoulder. “I’m”—I shake my head—“I’m just not there.”

“It’s Allison, right?” she asks and I close my mouth and open it again, waiting for the words to come out, denying that it has to do with her and everything to do with me, but nothing comes out, so she continues, “You couldn’t take your eyes off her the whole time.”

“We work together,” I finally say.

“It’s more than that. I don’t even think you realize it.” And she turns and walks back in as I stand here, telling myself to give her the night and then go to her tomorrow, but my heart knows that she can’t go to bed thinking I left with her. If nothing else, I need her to know that.

So here I am jogging up her steps. Her house sits in darkness. I ring the doorbell once and wait, putting my hands on the door, looking in, and nothing. I ring one more time and this time I see something. A light turns on from the side and I see her shadow coming closer. She opens the door and my heart stops. Her hair is up on her head. I don’t even know what she’s wearing because wrapped around her is an ivory cover as she holds it from the inside of her cocoon.

“Jesus, Max,” she says and I see her eyes are a bit red. “You scared the shit out of me.” She looks down and then back up again.

“I need to talk to you.” My hands go into my pockets before I grab her and pull her to me. “Shannon, she…” I stumble when she looks up and I see it, the death in her eye. Everything that I’ve worked for is gone, because she looks at me like I’m nothing. “I didn’t know she was going to be there.” I know I’m saying this for nothing because she has already scratched me off her list, already decided I wasn’t worth the fight, but I’m going to give it all to her and then I’m going to leave. “I wanted to answer you a million times today, but I didn’t have the balls to do it. I tried staying away from you and not getting my hopes high. Fuck, your family hates my guts, and here I am jonesing for you.”

She looks at me with a face of shock.

“Anyway, but I didn’t want you to think I was leaving with her.” I shake my head, now thinking what a mistake this was. “That’s all I have to say.” And I turn, jog down the stairs, and drive away, the whole time looking at her in the mirror as she stands there looking at me.

The rest of the night is spent lying on my couch, flicking through infomercials. The sun comes up as Stanley sits on my chest, and I pet her. I drift off I think at noon and only wake when I hear banging at my door. I get up and walk over, opening it to see Denise.

“Are you not ready?” she asks me, coming in, and I take in her outfit. “It’s Ed Sheeran night.” She pulls her jacket down to show me her plaid shirt. “You forgot.”

I rub my hand through my hair. “Yeah, I guess I did,” I say, walking away. “Let me get changed and we can go.” I head to my bathroom and turn on the shower. “I’m going to be thirty. Make yourself at home.” I shower and pull out a pair of black jeans and a dark gray T-shirt as I whip my leather off my hanger and put it on. The last thing I put on is my black boots. “Okay, I’m ready.” I walk into the room and she closes the television and gets up.

“Steve was really pissed when I took back those extra two tickets.” She starts walking for the door. “Who is joining us?” she asks and I look down as I slip my sunglasses on.

“I guess we will find out now, won’t we,” I tell her, making my way over to the rink, which is now set up for the concert. I still go into the entrance that the players go to and walk down the hallway, but there are so many people running around it’s a mad house. We make our way out to the ice, which is now covered with a wooden floor. The lights are dim and the DJ plays some songs as we find our seat two rows from the stage.

“Holy shit. Look at these seats,” Denise says, sitting down and pulling out her phone.

I make her sit at the end as I sit with the empty seat beside me. I hold my breath till the opening act comes out. James Blunt sings “You’re beautiful” and all I can do is look around at the full arena. Well, full minus the two seats next to me. I inhale deeply, knowing they will probably stay empty. Denise screams as he continues singing when I see the people move back, making way for the person that got the tickets for the seats next to me. Allison. She walks looking down at her feet to make sure she doesn’t trip on anything and I know the minute she looks up that she’s surprised to see me, as the person behind her pushes her forward.

“What?” She smiles and puts her head down, her hair falling around her.

She whispers to the girl next to her, who tilts her head back and laughs. She smirks at me and I see it’s Karrie’s best friend Vivienne.

James Blunt leaves the stage and we all clap and Denise looks over and sees Allison. “I knew if he took the tickets away from me it would have to be a good reason,” she says and Allison laughs.

“Well, this answers my question,” Allison says. “All day I was calling people and thanking them for the two tickets that showed up this morning, and each one didn’t know what I was talking about.” She laughs as she knocks me sideways. “Well done.”

“I’m going to get something to eat and drink,” Denise says and Vivienne jumps up.

“I’ll come.” She follows her out and we watch them making their way through the crowd.

“Allison,” I say quietly. “I…” I shake my head, looking down.

“You’re just full of surprises, aren’t you?” She sits down and turns to me. “Last night…” She doesn’t have time to continue because a couple of people have stopped me and asked for pictures. Then when they finally leave Denise and Vivienne come back and hand us both water bottles.

“I know you don’t drink when you are training and working, so I got you water,” Denise says and she holds up a hot dog and bites into it. “I think it cost me fifty bucks.” She continues chewing as I watch her. The whole time I keep looking over at Allison, who is talking to Vivienne, but then the lights go out, and we all stand up, waiting for Ed to come out. And then he just walks across the stage with his guitar as he starts singing.

Allison stops clapping and her hands go down to her sides and they brush against mine. At first, I think it’s an accident, but then she slowly does it again as her fingers graze mine. I look down at our hands close together. Her delicate hand moves next to mine, and I take it. I turn my hand around this time, rub my palm down her inner wrist, and snake my fingers into hers. Her hands open up and entwine with mine as Ed Sheeran sings “Castle on the hill.” Our hands stand still, both of us afraid to let go, as my thumb rubs her.

It’s at that moment I know I’m more far-gone than I thought. It’s at that moment I know I can’t walk away from her. It’s then that I know my whole life I’ve been waiting for this one fucking moment. I know that whatever hell I went through before it was all for this moment right here.

Our hands hold each other the whole time, both of us almost on edge when his slow song “Dive” comes on. The minute his voice comes out and sings the beginning, I don’t think. I just pull her out of the row and walk down the aisle with her running behind me to keep up, but I make my way to the back as I wave to the guy blocking the hallway to where her office is. Thank fuck it’s the same guy who works the game because he just smiles and opens the curtain for me to go in the back. I open her door, the lights are off but a small light on under her desk, pulling her in, and closing the door. I look down at our hands still together. My chest heaving, I look at her leaning against the door while she looks up at me and it’s there. The look I’ve been waiting to see, that I’ve hoped to see. The look that makes me see I’m not the only one in this.

“Max,” she whispers.

My eyes go back down to see our hands still attached. I slip my hand out of hers and turn to face her, both my hands going to the side of her head. Her hands go onto my chest.

“Max,” she says again and it’s almost like a plea.

“Allison,” I say, looking down at her. “I tried. Tried to ignore this.”

Her hands move up on my chest, softly, slowly. “Kiss me. Please, Max, just kiss me.”

And I bend my head as she tilts her head back a touch and my lips touch hers, soft at first. Electricity shoots through me. I move back again. One hand goes to her cheek and my thumb rubs her chin. I lean back down again, this time not going slow. This time my mouth opens and my tongue goes into her mouth as she gasps out. This time my tongue twirls with hers. This time I kiss her with everything I have. My hand goes around her waist and I push her closer to me, and her hands finally wrap around my neck, our mouths never leaving each other. We kiss each other as if it’s the last time we will ever see each other. We give in to the months of tension. We give in to the crashing around us, and I pray to fuck we are still standing after this.