Chapter Six
Cassie
It takes a few hours, but we emerge from the kitchen with everything prepared for the grill just as I’m starting to get hungry again.
Total overkill, if you ask me, but my family always get on better when there’s a mountain of food to consume - and Beth is refusing to settle for anything less than perfection. Her engagement do is actually tomorrow, and today is meant to be relaxed, but for some reason she seems to be taking every part of this week as a personal reflection on her relationship.
At least I managed to navigate their questions about Josh and I well enough to satisfy them all - for now, anyway. I can barely remember half of what I said, so I’m hoping Josh can play along without too many prompts from me.
“Ohh, it’s such a gorgeous day, don’t you think?” Mom says with a large smile as we step out to clear blue skies and the sun burning right above our heads. There’s just the right amount of breeze, and it’s the perfect day to be out by the pool.
“Pity we spent the morning inside then.” I mutter as we carry trays over to the tables next to the grill.
Mom gives me a long-suffering look and gestures over to the pool area. “Honestly Cassandra, don’t you want to impress Josh? I’m trying to show him I raised you right, girl, you could at least play along for a few hours.”
“What the…No. No fucking way.” I can’t control my outraged response, and I lose any tolerance for this game any longer.
That’s what this whole damn thing has been about?
“Language!” Mom snaps back at me, but I’m not listening anymore. I’m done playing this fucked up ‘good wife’ role that Mom wants to put me in, and I’ll be damned if she uses me to show off.
I stalk away from the table of food, heading towards the pool with some vague juvenile intention of finding Josh and telling him that the next thing on his list of ways to piss off my family should involve insulting all their food to hell, and treating me like an actual independent person who has value beyond just the kitchen.
Until I catch sight of him.
Exploding up out of the pool, water sluicing down his hard, muscled body and the sun glinting off his ever-present charming smile.
I stagger to a halt, suddenly unable to stop looking.
He’s animated and laughing with someone else, not even looking my way, and I can’t work out what’s unexpectedly caught at me.
I’ve seen Josh hundreds of times - and I must’ve seen him half naked dozens of those.
How have I never before noticed how god-damn hot he is?
I mean, I always knew. Objectively. There’s a good reason he has a constant string of girls vying for his attention. And the way he uses his boyish good looks and powerful, stacked body has made me roll my eyes more than once. He’s attractive. I know that. I’ve teased him enough about it, same as he has me.
But I’ve never felt it before. Not in this gut-punching, sparks straight to my pussy kind of way.
Fuck.
This is not good.
“He’s really good with them.” I jump as Maria appears behind me.
“Huh?” I say stupidly, trying to work out what she’s talking about. I can’t take my eyes off Josh.
“They don’t usually warm to someone new so quickly - especially Ellie.” She continues. “It’s lovely isn’t it, watching them together?”
I blink again, and finally tear my gaze away from the water running down Josh’s rock-hard abs to see Lucas and Ellie bouncing around him in the pool.
They’re who he’s laughing and joking with, as he lunges and dives and just-about-misses them in some intricate game I can’t guess at from here.
“Ah, yes.” I agree absentmindedly.
Now that my focus isn’t narrowed down to just my crazy, bodily reaction, I can hear them shrieking with glee - shouting and screaming as they try and avoid Josh, and splashing out at anyone else who comes new.
“John seems to be appreciating the break, too.” Maria’s voice has turned amused, and I glance up to see John dozing on one of the sunbeds. “At least someone is watching my kids.”
I grin at her, starting to breathe properly again after the shock of seeing Josh…like that. I feel a rush of gratitude at her sudden appearance, and the inadvertent way she completely refocused me away from that crazed reaction.
Even if I can still feel it - an uncomfortable awareness at the edges of my consciousness, a niggling feeling that something is wrong.
But while I’m watching my niece and nephew, and have the distraction of Maria beside me, I can ignore that.
“You know,” After a few moments of looking over at them in silence, Maria starts talking again. “Mom didn’t mean that exactly how she said it.”
And…my fledgling feelings of kinship with her disappear.
“Yes, she did.” I say shortly.
“Well, maybe.” Maria sighs. “But she didn’t mean to insult you, she just…doesn’t understand, Cassie.”
I give her a highly skeptical look. I’m pretty sure she understands completely, and that’s exactly why she makes those pointed, insulting comments.
“Did she send you over here to bring me back?” I ask. “I was the ‘good girl’ all morning, I think I need a break.”
She tries a small smile, and shrugs. “You know how it is…Beth wants some girl time to talk about her engagement, and the wedding, and all of that. Think you can get along for another hour or so?”
I feel like I want to scream, but I remind myself I’m used to exactly this. At least Maria isn’t lecturing me with the ‘it’s her engagement, don’t cause trouble’ argument that Mom would. And then I think of the trouble I’m going to be causing anyway with the whole scheme Josh and I have concocted, and feel a little bad.
A fresh bout of childish screaming erupts and distracts me for a moment, as I watch Josh picking Lucas up and throwing him back down into the water, then using his arms to create waves for the two kids to float up and down on. The boy is grinning and waving his arms around, but he’s been under at least twice now and I frown, glancing at Maria.
“Should he be doing that?” I ask hesitantly.
Her awkward smile turns real as she looks back over at them. “Honey, if he can convince those two that they’re having a good time, he can do whatever he likes.”
I laugh, shaking my head as Josh’s antics find a way to distract me from my familial obligations yet again. Something tugs at me as I watch them, seeing Josh playing and indulging Lucas and Ellie, acting like a big kid himself. I’ve never seen him with children before, but I guess it makes sense that he’d be good at it. He’s always had a way of engaging people.
“He’d be a great father.” Maria says warmly, in a disturbing echo of my own thoughts.
I smile a little, and shrug. He probably would. Eventually. If he ever settles down.
The idea of it disconcerts me a little, but Lucas spots us standing there and drowns out anything I might have thought before I can dwell on it.
“Mommy!” He yells, trying unsuccessfully to clamber out of the water from the side of the pool. Josh boosts him up, and he shrieks with laughter again. “Mommy, Mommy!”
Ellie rushes after her brother, climbing up the ladder steadily and then taking off towards us.
“Don’t run!” Josh yells.
They ignore him, scrambling towards us until they’re pulling and tugging at Maria, droplets of water flying everywhere and getting us both wet.
Maria just laughs and shakes her head as they try and tell her about all the games they were playing, all at once, interrupting themselves and each other as she makes encouraging noises.
Josh comes after them at a slower pace, then pulls me into him, his hands around my hips.
“Heyy!” I object, trying not to get completely soaked.
Which is hard when I’m momentarily distracted by the sudden awareness of his body against mine. I totally wasn’t expecting such an enthusiastic - or intimate - greeting, and I can’t deal with the way my already-confused body seems to want to react. All those disturbing thoughts from earlier come crashing uncomfortably back and I recoil deliberately.
“Sorry, babe, can’t help that I’m excited to see you.” He gives me that heart-spinning grin again and wraps his arm around my shoulder, getting the back of my dress wet and sending droplets of water running down my back. I just about manage to find it infuriating, if I ignore the way those little pinpricks of sensation want to wake up every nerve I have.
At least his attitude is off-putting enough to calm you down.
“You’re getting me all wet!” I push him off with a scowl, and he sends me a provocative look.
“Maybe that’s exactly what I’m trying to do, baby.” He wriggles his eyebrows at me suggestively, and I have to fight not to flush all over at the innuendo.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Josh and I make dirty comments all the time. It doesn’t mean anything. It doesn’t.
But god-damn it, despite him deliberately pushing buttons I hate, I’m at risk of my pussy reacting exactly as he’s pretending to want.
Maria laughs at us, and I’m not sure whether I’m grateful for the interruption, or slightly mortified at talking like that around her.
Maybe you never found this embarrassing before because it was never at risk of being true.
“Thanks for keeping them amused, Josh.” Maria says, nodding towards where Lucas and Ellie are clinging to her again. “Seems like you’re quite the hit.”
“They’re great kids - hell, could almost make me reconsider my no-children policy.” He grins back at her, then winks at us. “Almost.”
I try not to stare in shock at that announcement. Maria doesn’t manage quite as well, visibly reacting as her mouth starts to open.
“Hey - Lucas, Ellie!” He crouches down to their level, smiling widely at them as if he hasn’t just dropped a bombshell. “Want to go back to the pool? We should probably let your Mommy and Auntie go back. They’re doing important things, like…making…foood! And we wouldn’t want to get in the way of that, huh?”
They nod enthusiastically, chattering away as they take the hand he offers out to them. Maria lets go, still slightly bemused, but her instinctive willingness to take a break whenever the kids can be convinced winning out.
“How about we….race back to the pool! Buut, this is a walking race…no running, or you’re out!” Josh says loudly, overly-enthusiastic for their benefit, but I can hear the genuine amusement and enjoyment in it anyway.
They’re gone before either Maria or I can think of anything to say to his I don’t want kids announcement, and then we’re left standing awkwardly together, Maria not quite meeting my eyes.
I have the sudden urge to laugh out loud, imagining exactly what’s going through her mind.
It’s clever of him, that’s for sure - if there’s one thing my family won’t be able to accept, it’s the idea he doesn’t want kids. But with him being so good-natured and charming about it at the same time, and delighting Maria’s little ones…they won’t know how exactly to deal with it.
“Alright, let’s go back and give Beth the audience she wants, hmm?” I suggest easily, resuming our earlier conversation as if nothing has happened.
He’s distracted me enough that I’m mostly over Mom’s most recent infuriating comments, and it’s more fun than it should be to play along with his act.
At least, I’m pretty sure it’s an act. We’ve never talked about children, but he can’t actually not want them, can he?
Especially not after what I’ve seen with Lucas and Ellie today.
Not that it’s really any of my business. He’s a friend, and we’ve always been supportive of each others’ life choices.
There’s no reason it should be disconcerting me.
Maria gives me an uncertain look but is far too hesitant to say anything, and we walk back in silence to find Mom and Beth still fussing around the food.
Dad has started up the grill now, and my stomach rumbles at the appetizing scents starting to drift across the large, open grounds. It’s almost worth it despite having to listen to Beth chatter excitedly about everything she can possibly think to say about how Neil proposed to her.
I should be more interested, I know.
But how can she talk non-stop for over an hour about what probably only took a few hours in real-time?
“Hey, babe!” It takes me a moment to realize it’s Josh yelling, and a moment longer to realize he’s talking to me. “Can you fix me some food?”
I glance over, slightly taken aback at the request - and his attitude. He’s lying there in the sun, drying off from the morning spent in and out of the pool with the kids - who, for once, seem equally exhausted.
“Sure, okay.” I respond, starting to throw together some of the food that’s coming off the grill.
I don’t mind the distraction from what Beth is talking about, and Josh and I do stuff like this for each other all the time, so it’s not until I finish that I notice the conversation around me has tailored off a little.
I give them a little half-smile, suddenly realizing how it must look to them - especially with Josh’s attitude, which from anyone else or in any other context I would’ve shot down hard enough to make him spin.
I head over to Josh feeling a little bemused, assuming he’s doing it deliberately, but a little uncertain as to what I think of it. I was enjoying having my friend around - the idea of that being replaced by some arrogant douchebag isn’t appealing, even if it does help our story.
“Here.” I say, a little shortly, as I set the plate down on the table beside the set of sun loungers he’s occupying.
“Thanks, babe.” He grins at me, and the sparkle in his eyes tells me that he knows exactly what he’s doing.
I give him a brief scowl that I know no one else will see, and that grin gets deeper.
“Gotta let me have some fun, Caz.” He winks.
“You’ve been having fun all morning!” I object fiercely, keeping my voice hushed.
I’m the one that’s had to deal with my Mom and sisters all day, while he’s been having a laugh by the pool.
“You mean you haven’t?” His expression takes on a mock-innocent look that wouldn’t fool a four-year-old and I turn around before I try hitting him with something - my standard response when he gets this way, and one I’m not entirely sure would be appropriate for my boyfriend.
Just as I’m starting to walk away, he slaps my ass with a laugh.
“Nice one, Cassie.” His voice grows louder again. “This stuff sure looks like it was worth all that time in the kitchen.”
I stutter to a stop in pure shock for a moment, my ass stinging and my mouth struggling not to drop open, before I recover enough to keep on walking.
I can hear him chuckling behind me, and I’m not sure whether to turn around and glare at him or just go along with the pretense that this is perfectly normal.
Either way, he’s having far too much fun provoking me. Like he thinks this game gives him some liberty to do that or something.
You’re meant to be pissing them off, not me!
I have to stop myself turning to scowl at him again.
The problem is, Josh knows all my buttons. And he’s pressing them so deliberately right now that even though I know what he’s doing, it’s still really hard not to react in my usual snarky, irreverent way.
You’re meant to be a young couple madly in love. Remember that. Remember it.
So I take a deep breath as I walk back up to where my Mom and sisters are still standing around the tables of food, and notice that their conversation has become somewhat muted as they glance between Josh and I.
I take a split second to work out how I want to play this, and then give them a light smile and a shrug.
“Men!” I say, rolling my eyes. “Guess there’s some things you just can’t change, hey?”
Mom and Maria exchange a quick look, and I realize the sentiment is rather similar to what Maria was trying to tell me earlier - only this time, she’s looking unsettled.
Yep, another point for Josh. Pick something he knows I can’t help but react to, and make me try to cover it up, and it will look exactly like that - a poor effort to pretend I don’t care. He’s just a bastard for doing it, and especially without any warning.
I can deal with it as an act - even this. At least, I think so.
But he’s in so much fucking trouble when we get back to our room tonight.
Beth puts up with our strange silence for a moment longer, and then squeals.
“Hey, Cassie! You haven’t even seen my ring yet! Oh my god, I can’t believe I didn’t show you immediately, I was just so caught up in everything else going on and you know it really is a lot to think about but—ohh, here, look!” She pulls me forward before I have a chance to object, and for once I’m grateful for her self-absorption. Takes the focus off of me, anyway.
“Isn’t it perfect?” She gushes, and I blink as I see the large diamond on her finger, surrounded by a cluster of sapphires and sparkling in the light. “Neil spent so long choosing it, he told me - it’s diamond, because doesn’t every girl deserve a diamond, and then the sapphires because of my eyes, and ohh, Cassie, I can’t believe this is finally happening to me.”
I smile at her, genuinely for once. Whatever else I think about her, even I can get swept up in the moment and her romantic notions. I give her a quick hug, that she’s obviously not expecting, but returns after a moment.
“I’m really happy for you, Beth. The ring is stunning, and it sounds like he really cares—”
“Oh, isn’t it just?” She sighs dramatically again, then deliberately lowers her voice. “It’s probably worth thousands, you know. But Neil can do things like that. His family are super wealthy, have I told you that? Yeah, I’ve told you that—”
Only a dozen times.
I nod, but she’s barely waiting for the acknowledgment.
“Yeah, so, it’s just all going to be perfect. We’ll have the wedding of our dreams, and he’s got an amazing job in Phoenix so then he’ll finally take me out of this shit-stain town and into a real city—”
Beth continues talking at the mile-a-minute pace that I always end up tuning out before I start getting a headache, and I glance over at Maria, who has a look of long-standing patience on her face, and my Mom, who seems mildly irritated.
It’s pretty much the only thing Beth and I have ever agreed on - wanting to get out of the small border town we grew up in - but Mom and Maria still live there, and I feel a pang of guilt at her lack of tact. Not that Beth has ever been known for tact.
At least it gets me out of the limelight again, and I end up with some space to try and settle into the mixed role of myself-but-not-quite and fake-in-love-with-my-best-friend. Which is hard as hell. Even my body seems to be starting to get confused about what’s real and what’s not.
How the hell does Josh do this for a living?
* * *
“Cassie! There you are, sweetie.”
I glance up from my book to see Mom heading towards me, and try not to sigh. I was just starting to actually relax.
After the far-more-hectic-than-necessary morning and then being cornered into listening to Beth’s stories, I’d finally managed to escape for a couple of hours of lying out in the sun by the pool. You know, the sort of thing I’d been hoping for all along.
“Yes, Mom?” I ask.
“I just wanted to borrow you to talk for a moment.” Mom starts, and I put the book down.
“Okay.” I agree, still waiting.
Her eyes dart to Josh, lying with his eyes closed only a few feet away, and then back again. “Over here, sweetie.”
She nods away from the pool, and this time I look over at Josh, raising an eyebrow that he doesn’t see.
Is there something else he’s done now?
I don’t think he’s actually asleep, but he’s clearly not that interested in our exchange. Which I don’t blame him for at all, except I have to resist the urge to prod him and ask whether he knows what this is about.
Looking back at Mom, I oblige, swinging my legs off the sun lounger and walking over to the edge of the pool area.
“Yes?” I ask again, giving a smile I almost believe and attempting to bolster my tolerance for the umpteenth time today.
And the week has barely started…we haven’t even had Beth’s engagement party yet!
“Oh, good.” She enthuses, as if this discussion had been my idea, giving me a wide smile that I don’t trust for an instant. “I just wanted to tell you, honey, that Matthew just arrived.”
I blink at her.
“Who?”
“Matthew! Oh, you know Matthew, he was in tenth grade with you!” She says with far too much cheer.
I have no idea who she’s talking about.
“I don’t think I remember—” I start getting an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach, suspicions rising. “Why is Matthew here, Mom?”
“Well, you know, since he’s such an old family friend, I thought I’d invite him - we have so much room here, you know how it is. And then I found out that he’s moving to LA in the fall! So I thought it would just be the perfect opportunity for you both to catch up, you know, so he could have a friend when he moves!” She announces with an excited gesture, her smile starting to feel forced.
I just stare at her in silence for a moment, too stunned to do anything else.
I was expecting this.
It was the whole reason I brought Josh, dammit!
But I never would’ve guessed I’d have to deal with it with Josh here.
“A friend.” I say, completely deadpan. “That’s what he came for?”
“Well, you know…” She gestures helplessly.
“I’m here with Josh.” I say bluntly, cutting through all her attempts to act like this is anything other than a blatant set-up.
“Well, I didn’t know about that when I invited him!” She snaps at me, her pleasant facade cracking. “So now you need to at least make some effort, Cassie, or who knows what he’ll think…”
That you’re completely insane and too egotistical to cancel and save him making a fool of himself?
I just look at her, completely unimpressed, and tired of these games.
“No thanks, Mom. You invited the poor guy - you entertain him. I’m going back to the pool.” I start to turn around, and she grabs my arm, stepping closer.
“This is your sister’s engagement week, Cassie.” She hisses, “It’s not the time for you to be difficult about this - it’s not fair to Beth to cause all this drama.”
I tug my arm away and step back, glaring back as my whole body reacts violently to the accusation.
The only one causing drama here is you.
I don’t say it. I’ve played this game and had enough arguments about it not to bother anymore.
I still haven’t quite shaken the childish ‘that’s so unfair!’ reaction, but I’m mature enough now to recognize it’s never going to be fair. That’s just the way life - and my mother - is. She’ll throw whatever she can in my face just to get the response she wants.
“Just spend a little time with him, Cassie.” Her attitude becomes pleading a moment later, as I’m still staring at her stonily. “That’s all I’m asking. Can’t you, for once, just do as I ask and help me uphold our family’s reputation?”
I have no idea what that reputation is. My Mom talks about it often enough, but considering the way she acts, I can’t believe it’s in any way positive to start with.
And it’s not just this once either. I refrain from pointing out all the times I’ve done just that.
But I also know I’m not getting out of this conversation easily - and it’d be better for me to subtly make it clear to the guy, Matthew, that I’m not interested, than to leave him on the receiving end of Mom’s inability to handle confrontation and embarrassment.
“Fine.” I say, frustrated. “I’ll have a quick conversation with him, and let him know I’m here with Josh.”
“Well, okay, but maybe give it a bit of time first.” She winces. “After all, he’s moving to LA and it’d be so nice for you both to be friends. Besides, you never know how things are going to go, or what might happen with you and Josh. Maybe…he’s not the right one for you, Cassandra - you’re never going to know unless you consider a few alternatives. Just…keep your eyes open.”
She gives me a knowing smile, all ease and grace again now that I’ve agreed, and I blink at that comment as she starts whisking me away to where Matthew is presumably waiting.
Seriously?!
I don’t know whether to be outraged again, suspicious that this set-up occurred because of Josh instead of despite him, or subtly pleased that his attempts to put my family off might be working.
I decide to go with the latter, since it’s by far the most pleasant of those options.
We end up at the tables scattered with food from the barbecue nearer the house, and I see a man there putting together what looks like a meat-and-more-meat sandwich.
“Matthew!” Mom enthuses, as if she’s known this man all her life.
He looks up and turns towards us with a smile, and I give a polite one back.
He’s not bad looking - certainly better than some of the men Mom has presented me with - with overly-styled blond hair slicked back from a slightly pudgy face. He adjusts his glasses slightly as he steps forward and I bring an arm up to shake his hand.
That gets awkwardly pushed aside as he goes in for a hug, and I try to adjust to the gesture, briefly wrapping one arm around his back.
“It’s so good to see you again, Cassie.” Matthew says, and I have to blink at him for a moment as I wonder whether he actually remembers me.
I don’t recognize him at all.
“Ah…yes, you too.” I agree anyway, giving another polite smile as I try to step back again.
I’m grateful when his attention returns to his plate of food, and he picks it up with another smile, standing just a bit too close to me.
“You look beautiful today.” He says, with a glance down at my body that suddenly reminds me I’m only wearing a bikini.
Oh fuck.
I’m not entirely sure I can deal with this.
I feel a spasm of guilt and try to push aside my sudden desire to cover my body - which is bizarre, since I’ve never had a problem enjoying a bit of attention before, and I’m not actually with Josh.
I turn to the food, uncomfortable and more than a little confused, picking up an apple as Mom gives us both a big smile.
“I’m so glad you could come, Matthew.” She enthuses. “Cassie, why don’t you show Matthew some of the ranch? You know we’ve been coming here since Cassie was just a kid, I’m sure she’s got all sorts of favorite places she’d like to show you.”
What the fuck?
It takes all my effort not to glare at her.
I wonder whether she remembers that’s exactly what I wanted to do with Josh this morning. If she does, it’s yet another sign that she doesn’t like him, which should be a good thing, but…
“That would be lovely.” He gives me another warm smile, and now I feel bad for him as well.
“Umm, well…okay.” I make the sudden decision.
Get him away from my Mom, make the situation obvious. That’ll do.
“Well, I’ll leave the two of you alone, then.” My Mom doesn’t quite wink, but it’s definitely implied.
I deliberately turn away from her, and Matthew follows me.
“I guess we could walk through the gardens.” I childishly pick the one place I never had any interest in.
It’s also near enough to the pool area, and where my whole family are, that there’s no risk of being alone.
Matthew walks along beside me, and I don’t look at him as I take a bite of my apple.
Polite, but blunt. Not enough to scandalize my family, but enough to make it obvious very quickly.
My usual approach when it comes to these things.
“So, what brought you up this way today?” I ask.
He laughs a little. “Well, your Mom invited me, and I thought it might be nice to see you again.”
I give him a half-smile. “Okay, I’ll be honest - I don’t remember you at all, Matthew. Did we actually know each other in college?”
He flushes and glances away. “Um, that’s okay, I wasn’t…sure you would. Though your Mom seemed to think…”
“My Mom gets all sorts of ideas in her head. Not many of them are entirely grounded in reality.” I interrupt, knowing exactly what she’d think of me saying that and not caring in the slightest. Matthew seems like a decent enough guy to understand.
“Oh, well…” He shrugs.
“So we didn’t know each other then?” I say with a smile. “Believe me, I won’t be offended if you say don’t have a clue who I was either.”
He gives me a ‘you’re kidding, right?’ look and I raise an eyebrow.
“Yeah, Cassie, you were the hottest girl in class. I think everyone remembers you.” He says, the comment just barely the right side of lewd.
“Hmm,” I consider. “I’m not sure…”
He laughs. “Yes, it was blatantly obvious you didn’t notice. I think you were too distracted with school…”
I’m getting the uncomfortable feeling of a group of boys at college discussing and perving on my oblivious younger self.
I laugh it off anyway with a shrug and a look. “I think I still am now.”
He grins again. “Yeah, your Mom mentioned - med school, right?”
There’s the opening you were aiming for.
I nod. “Yeah, between that and my boyfriend Josh, I don’t have much time for anything else these days.”
That gets a reaction.
He recoils slightly, blinking in surprise. “Your…boyfriend?”
I smile, appearing completely oblivious. “Yeah, Josh.”
Then, against all odds, he actually steps closer to me.
“And…how’s that going?” He gives me another smile that I don’t quite know how to interpret, as I stare at him.
What the fuck?
“Um…good.” I say, then try and emphasize that again as I get over his unexpected reaction. “Really good - he’s here this week, actually, meeting my family for the first time.”
“Ohh, really…” He gives me another strange look, and I try and step slightly away from him again, feeling uncomfortably close to this guy I don’t know at all.
We head past the pool area and I shift our direction to take us just a little nearer, gesturing to where Josh is still lying in the sun.
“That’s him over there.” I say, trying to make a point of it, and then I give an instinctive wave, even though I’m not sure Josh is even awake.
“Mmhmm.” Matthew murmurs, glancing over.
Then Josh waves back, and I feel an unexpected wave of relief. I smile at him, even though he’s on the other side of the pool and I’m pretty sure we’re silhouetted against the sun.
The desire to be back there, with him and my sun lounger, overwhelms me as I finally feel completely done with my Mom’s games.
“Well,” I begin, with a sidelong look at Matthew beside me. “You know, I’m actually feeling pretty tired. If you don’t mind, I might go back over there…”
I take a step in that direction, and he frowns.
“Aw, c’mon, Cassie. I was really hoping to talk to you - you know, I’m moving to LA in a few months and I thought it would be great to get to know you…” He says, and I’m uncomfortably reminded of my mother’s pressure yet again as I turn back towards him.
How is he still interested in this? What the fuck is he doing?
I don’t believe for a second he wants to be friends, not with the things he’s said and the way he’s looking at me…
Before I can work out how to respond, Josh appears beside me, his arm around my shoulder and pulling my body safely into his, so I’m facing Matthew instead of standing right beside him.
It’s surprisingly possessive, but it’s such a relief that I melt into him, making me want nothing more than to turn and bury my head in his shoulder. My arm goes around his waist instead, and I squeeze him close, my smile reappearing.
“Hello.” Josh says, slightly abruptly, holding his hand out to Matthew. “I’m Josh - Cassie’s boyfriend.”
“Matthew.” Matthew responds, similarly abrupt, pumping his hand once and glancing back at me.
“So,” Josh starts again, and I can almost feel the heat in his expression as he gives Matthew a meaningful glance, his voice deceptively friendly. “Are you another of Cassie’s relatives? I’m afraid I don’t know everyone just yet…”
“No, I’m an old family friend, actually - Adelaide invited me to spend a couple of days here.” Matthew says, similarly not-quite-friendly as I try and get over the ‘couple of days’ comment. “Cassie and I knew each other in college.”
He shifts closer to me as I stare at him in disbelief. He’s actually saying that. Despite what I had just said about not even remembering who he was.
“Wow, college…such a long time ago.” Josh repeats. “Strange that Cassie’s never mentioned you.”
Josh raises an eyebrow at me and I try not to laugh. The typical male posturing - and the way Josh is deliberately playing it up - would usually have me rolling my eyes, but I’m actually kind of enjoying it.
“Yeah…it’s been a while.” I agree, not going quite so far as repeating that I can’t remember Matthew at all - despite starting to feel like he might deserve it.
“So you guys were catching up on old times?” Josh asks.
“Something like that.” I mutter.
“Any fun stories I should know about?” He grins, winking comically at Matthew, who just blinks.
“No, not really.” I shrug, trying to make my disinterest obvious.
Matthew keeps looking at me, like he’s expecting me to do something - or at least take a more active part in this conversation - but I’m more than happy to let Josh take over.
I clearly wasn’t being obvious enough to get Matthew off my back, so if Josh can do it for me…that makes a nice change from how these things usually go. I might as well take advantage of having my boyfriend here.
“Well, I’m moving to LA in the summer - so maybe we’ll have the chance to make some fun memories then.” Matthew finally says, a strange mixture of suggestive and defensive, as he works out I’m not going to jump in with anything else. “Adelaide certainly thought so - she thought Cassie could give me some advice on living there, you know, before I move.”
I don’t know why the fuck he keeps talking about my mother - like her name makes a difference or something. Unless they’ve become far more friendly than the casual invite suggests.
“Oh, really?” Josh’s voice lowers, and I swear it feels dangerous for a moment, before he continues in an overly-enthusiastic tone. “Well, I’m living in LA too, I’d be more than happy to help you out…”
Without waiting for a response, he launches into a description of the best neighborhoods to live in, common places to avoid, where you can get the best value for your money - which is almost nowhere - in an overload of information that makes me zone out.
I’m pretty sure it’s having the same effect on Matthew, which is fine by me, especially as it has the advantage of completely shutting him up and turning the conversation away from me.
Instead I just enjoy the way we’re standing together, my head leaning against his shoulder and our arms around each other. It’s coupley as hell, but as far as I’m concerned that’s exactly what Matthew - and my family - need to see right now. And the unexpectedly protective vibe I’m getting from Josh is making me weirdly happy.
I never thought my Mom would go to this extreme - or that the guy she’d pick would completely ignore the fact I have a boyfriend - but having Josh here almost makes it okay anyway.
“…I’m sorry, baby, am I boring you?” I blink as I realize that was directed at me.
I glance between the two of them and see that he’s definitely boring Matthew, then smile dumbly and shake my head.
I’m pretty sure he’s giving me a generous opportunity to escape, but right now I’m appreciating the shield he’s providing from whatever my family - or, more specifically, my Mom - might come up with next.
“No, of course not.” I look at Matthew again, putting a hand on Josh’s chest in support and privately mourning the book I left lying on my sun lounger earlier. “Property is a shared passion of ours.”
I feel Josh’s chest vibrate under my hand, even though he keeps a straight face, nodding along eagerly and continuing his spiel.
We’ve literally never talked about it before.
He kisses the side of my head, tucking my hair behind my ear and smiling back at Matthew. “Oh yes, we could talk about it for hours. You’re asking the right people about this, I tell you.”
He ignores the fact Matthew hasn’t asked a thing about where he should be renting in LA, and now has a scarcely concealed look of frustration on his face.
It takes another twenty minutes, and several attempted interruptions, before Matthew finally has enough and awkwardly excuses himself - just as I’m starting to seriously reconsider deciding to stick around.
This shit is tedious.
After he’s gone, Josh and I look at each other and last all of ten seconds before bursting into laughter.
He pulls me closer and I step easily into his embrace, resting my head on his chest and sighing deeply.
“What a dick.” Josh mutters.
I look up at him and shake my head.
“You’re the one that just spent an hour talking about LA’s rental market.” I point out.
He snorts again. “Yeah, pity I only knew about ten minutes’ worth of material…I do hope he doesn’t take all of that too seriously…”
“I’m sure he won’t remember any of it at all.” I reassure him, and he flicks my ear, making me try and twist my head away.
“I preferred it when you weren’t doing that, you know.” I scowl at him, to be met with another grin.
“Too bad, baby.” His eyes sparkle at me, and I grab at his hand before he can do it again.
“I hate you calling me that, too.” I add.
“I know.” He says lightly, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and steering us away from the pool area. “He was a dick though.”
“Yeah, he was.” I agree, shaking my head with a sigh. “Thanks for coming along to save me.”
“Anytime, Caz.” He kisses my forehead again, even though there’s no one around to see.
“I really didn’t think my Mom would do that. Not with you here.” I say, partly just talking to distract myself from some of the silly feelings that want my attention.
“Yeah. I guess it’d be wrong to say she’s a dick too, huh?” He asks, light amusement on his face, though I wonder whether maybe he’s a little more serious than he seems.
I laugh and shift closer to him, shaking my head. “I better not answer that one.”
“So, d’you want to show me some of this place that’s maybe, ah…away from your family for a bit?” He asks with a knowing smile.
“Definitely.” I answer decisively, looking around at the direction we’re wandering aimlessly in and making an effort to direct us away from the pool area that everyone’s gathered in.
“Perfect.” He says, then leans in and adds. “We can pretend we snuck away to have sex.”
I laugh again, looking up and meeting the amusement dancing in his eyes, his hair slightly curled from the pool earlier and bouncing over his brow. Handsome as fuck and - for this week only - conveniently possessive fake boyfriend.
Perfect indeed. I just need to get a grip on the strange-as-fuck images that pop into my head when he says that.
Like us actually having sex.
* * *
“So, that’s one day down, hmm?” Josh says as we get back to our room for the night. “I think it went well.”
Well.
I think back to the day of just about answering my family’s questions, Josh announcing he didn’t want children to Maria and then being ambushed by my Mom’s latest set-up…
At least after Matthew, Josh hadn’t left me for the rest of the day - hovering protectively by my side in some possessive macho display to try and piss everyone off further. Not really necessary, but I rather appreciated the results anyway.
And with Mom insisting that Matthew was seated next to us at dinner, I’d actually avoided most of the argument that had broken out between Beth and Anne - and any further questions about Josh and I. Instead, we’d spent the whole of it becoming more and more obnoxiously infatuated with each other, just to irritate Matthew - and, ideally, my mother.
It had almost become a game - who could touch the other the most, pay them the most ridiculous compliments, talk up the others’ deliberately minor achievements - and it had been unintentionally hilarious to do all the things I wouldn’t ever dream of in a real relationship.
“Yeah, it’s gone well.” I give Josh a sidelong smirk as I shrug off the jacket I’d put on for dinner. “If you consider irritating the hell out of everyone a good thing.”
“Which, last I checked, you do - that was the job, baby.” He grins at me, stretching and letting his shirt ride up to reveal a hint of the rock-hard abs beneath. They catch my eyes for a moment, and I shake my head at his automatic attention-gathering gestures. The ones that seem to be having more of an effect on me than I’d like right about now.
“You really need to stop calling me that, Josh - and cut the whole macho douchebag act, hmm? Those comments after Mom had me sequestered in the kitchen all morning almost had me going after you tooth-and-nail. Not exactly the happily in love image we’re trying to present.” I say in exasperation, batting my hand against his chest for emphasis. “You’re meant to be pissing them off, not me.”
His smile widens as he looks down at me, and I know exactly how much he’s been enjoying baiting me while I haven’t been able to respond.
“I was just trying to be helpful, Caz.” He says with false innocence. “Thought I’d give you some reasons to break up with me later.”
“You’re meant to be breaking up with me, Josh, remember?” I point out. “Piss them off first, so that when you end it dramatically they’ll be relieved enough that I’m not with you to hold off on bothering me about any of this for a while.”
“Hmm.” He frowns. “You know, if your Mom’s solution to not liking me is to try and set you up with Matthew while we’re together I’m not sure this plan is going to work out how you hope. Seems more likely that she’ll start throwing guys at you that meet her standards - before you go and pick another asshole for yourself.”
I pause at that, matching his frown. He has a point.
“That…does sound more likely.” I admit, then change tack. “Well, give me some terrible, traumatic break-up then and I’ll just act like this whole experience put me off relationships for a good, long time.”
“That, I can do.” He grins. “One terrible, traumatic break-up—”
My answering grin freezes into shock as Beth appears in the open doorway behind Josh’s shoulder.
Without thinking, I lunge forward, my lips meeting Josh’s and my arms wrapping around his neck as I desperately try to shut him up.
He goes tense and stupid under me, his whole body stiffening awkwardly as our lips squash together in the least romantic way I could imagine. I get a bit of teeth, and our noses almost crash into each other as I try to balance from the way adrenaline shot me forward.
Fuck.
It lasts the longest twenty seconds I’ve ever had in my life. Then I meet Beth’s eyes over his shoulder, using that as an excuse to break apart and trying for all the world to look as though she just interrupted us in the middle of something naughty and illicit.
“Oh, Beth!” I exclaim, not having to feign being shocked or flustered. “I didn’t know you were there!”
That’s the fucking truth.
I have no idea how much she overheard.
Trust it to be my most naturally suspicious, gossipy sister appearing unexpectedly in the doorway.
She gives me a strange look, then her nose wrinkles up with disdain.
“I was just stopping by to say that Neil and I are going to bed now - and since it’s my engagement party tomorrow, I want to get a good night of sleep. So don’t make any noise.” Her eyes run over the way Josh and I are standing awkwardly together and her lip curls. “Though from what I can see, I didn’t have to worry about that after all.”
She turns in one neat spin, leaving with a slight dramatic flare before I can answer the insult.
Not that I care. If that’s what she was focused on, as far as I’m concerned, that can only be a good thing.
The door slams behind her and I curse myself for not closing it in the first place.
What were Josh and I thinking, talking like that in the middle of the house I’m sharing with my privacy-invading family?!
“What was that?” Josh finally gets his wits together, hand on his mouth and one eyebrow raised.
“Sorry. I was just trying to shut you up - make it seem like we were in the middle of a passionate moment, and not casually discussing our imminent dramatic break-up.” I wipe my mouth and shake my head, scowling at him. “Though considering the way you tensed up as if I was attacking you or something, there was no chance of convincing anyone of that. I thought you were supposed to be good at this shit?”
I mutter the last part, not quite sure whether I’m talking about kissing or acting, but uncomfortably aware that my pride is stinging more than it should from just how bad that kiss was.
I mean, sure, I’ve been friends with Josh for years and neither of us has ever been the slightest bit interested in fucking, but…still.
I’m hot. I’m good at kissing - when I’m not slamming into someone purely as a distraction, anyway. And even with that small issue, most guys would’ve been seriously into it. Or at least enough to make a good display for Beth.
I’ve never gotten just…nothing. Especially from a guy as experienced as Josh—
“Oh, I can assure you, Cassie, I am.” Josh interrupts my train of thought, his voice lowering for emphasis and his sudden attention pinning me.
Something about his deep tone flickers along my skin, and I have to shake myself as I give him a thoroughly unimpressed look in return, shrugging.
“Yeah, sure, you can tell me that all you like—” I start, ready to make a joke about the girls that regularly fall at his feet and return us to our normal banter, but he steps closer before I can.
“I’m not going to tell you, Cassie.” His voice becomes a low murmur, and a pinprick of sensation runs down my spine as his hand comes up to cup my head, tilting it up towards him. “I’ll show you.”
My breath catches, and then before I can say anything - in agreement or not - his lips brush over mine.
Soft and warm and surprisingly gentle, but containing everything that had been missing just a few minutes ago.
My mouth softens under him, and then the gentle caress changes in an instant, becoming firmer and more insistent, igniting nerves I’d almost forgotten existed and sending sparks flaring through me.
His body is so close to mine that it feels like the kiss is joining far more than just our mouths. It makes me ache and want, and I’m suddenly desperate to push back, to kiss hard and deep and feel everything he has to offer. To press myself against him and have our tongues meet and clash and twist together.
But this is Josh. And this is just a…just…something.
It’s not real. It’s not passion. It’s just…a point he’s making.
It could fool me, though.
I moan slightly under him, unable to keep it in, and his mouth opens just the slightest bit, just enough to sink his tongue into my waiting mouth and slowly caress me, getting deeper and deeper and making me think of the other ways he could use it.
His mouth feels hot on mine, and I am pushing back now, wanting more of him, and I can feel his breath hitching in response, his hand moving in my hair as he brings me closer.
My pulse is going insane and my head feels like it’s spinning and I don’t have a clue what’s about to happen when it…stops.
Just like that.
He steps back, a small smile on his face that seems far too smug, and I’m left staring at him.
Hopelessly confused.
“You see?” He says easily, only the slight heat in his voice hinting that anything even happened.
I blink, and it takes me a long moment to remember where I am and what we’re doing here.
This is Josh. My friend. Making a point about being a good kisser.
And, from the way I thought that was going for a moment there, a fucking good actor too.
My god, if the women who play opposite him get that…
I tell my brain to shut up, and make a point of shrugging at Josh.
There’s no way to deny that his kiss worked - it had exactly the effect he wanted on me, as fucking awful as it is to admit it. He proved his point.
But that’s all it was. There was nothing else to it. The same kind of competitive spirit that we always have, it’s just that…usually…we stick to words.
“Mm.” I mutter a non-committal agreement, even though we both know he’s right, my wits slowly coming back to me. “Maybe next time, you could get it right in front of my family.”
I turn away and start sorting through my suitcase, looking for the night clothes I casually threw aside in the morning - ready to get to bed and try to forget everything that just happened.
The way my lips still tingle from his touch. The feeling of my body on edge, and horny now, and looking at Josh in all the wrong ways.
“You can count on it, Caz.” Josh murmurs, his voice deep and thick again, and as my stomach flips I wonder what exactly I just asked for.
And whether I’m going to be able to deal with another week of it.