Chapter Twenty-Six
Kristen
“I think he’s out for the count,” I said, pushing back a few stray hairs that had fallen onto Noah’s forehead.
He was sprawled out on the living room sofa, his legs flung about in strange directions, and yet, he looked so peaceful and happy. His chest rose and fell in little spurts, and there was a faint smile on his mouth. The living room carpet was a mess of crayons, coloring books, blocks, and toys, and Jake had to tread carefully to get to us.
“It’s about time,” he sighed.
I smiled. “I know. I was getting tired.”
“Getting tired?” he asked. “I passed tired about two hours ago.”
“Reckon we should get him into his own bed?”
Jake nodded and picked Noah up gently so that he was jostled as little as possible. I stayed behind and started to clean up the untidy living room. Luckily, Jake had bought Noah large boxes in which all his things were organized. The toys and all the art supplies had their own special boxes. I had just finished stuffing the toys into their box when Jake emerged.
“You don’t have to do that, Kristen,” he said, as he walked over to me. “Really, I’ll do it tomorrow.”
“It’ll only take a few minutes,” I reasoned. “I don’t mind.”
Jake sunk down to his knees beside me and started to help me. I smiled. “You can relax.”
“It would be extremely unchivalrous of me to sit by and left the fair maiden to work,” Jake said, using the terms from the storybook I’d read to Noah fifteen minutes ago.
I smiled. “This fair maiden doesn’t mind.”
“My conscience does, though,” he said.
It was so nice to sit there in his living room, tidying up together after a long day of entertaining Noah. The silence was a welcome respite, and I could feel a little tingle of excitement at the prospect of having a few moments alone with Jake.
We had taken things slowly, just like Jake had wanted. It had been weeks since that first night when we had first had sex. After that, we had gone out a couple of times for dinner, and we’d spent hours talking and getting to know one another. And yet, I still hadn’t found the courage to admit to Jake the truth about who I was.
Every time I attempted to bring up the topic, my nerves got the better of me, and I backed out. I knew my excuses were growing thin, but the longer I waited to tell him, the more fearful I became. It didn’t help that in the last few weeks I had fallen completely in love with Noah. He was a wonderful kid, and I had grown unreasonably attached to him.
While I was thrilled that he seemed to have taken to me just as fast, I was terrified that this would work against me once I told Jake the truth. He would see my connection with Noah as something different. He would assume I had forced a bond with his son to be manipulative. He was less likely to believe it was sincere, and I wouldn’t be able to blame him.
Even as we sat there, I found excuses to put off the moment. Jake was tired, we’d had a long day, and it wasn’t the right time for serious conversations or big revelations. For right now, I just wanted to sit here with Jake and enjoy his company without any distractions.
“Thank you so much for cooking dinner for us,” Jake said, interrupting my thoughts.
“Don’t be silly,” I said. “I enjoyed it. Plus both of you helped.”
He laughed. “You’re being generous, but I appreciate it all the same.”
I pushed the last box into the corner of the living room so that it wouldn’t be in any one’s way. “There,” I said triumphantly. “All done and no messy cleanup for tomorrow.”
“Lucky me.”
I smiled. “It was really nice spending today with you and Noah.”
“It was for me, too,” he nodded. “But maybe next time we could do something alone…just the two of us?”
I smiled. “I’d love to.”
“How about a golf tournament?”
I wrinkled my nose with distaste. “Uh…that sounds…”
“Awesome?” Jake offered.
“Awful is the adjective I was looking for,” I smiled.
He laughed.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
“Don’t be,” he said, as he continued to laugh. “Honestly, I like that you’re blunt with your opinions, and I like that you’re not putting on a show for me. That reminds me of…”
He trailed off, and I saw the smile falter on his face. I reached out immediately and took his hand. When his perfect blue eyes met mine, I gave him a reassuring smile.
“It’s okay,” I said gently. “You can say it. I remind you of your wife, don’t I?”
Jake nodded. “You do…”
“I don’t mind the comparison,” I said. “In fact, I’m sure you mean it as a compliment.”
“I do,” he nodded. “But it’s more than just that.”
“What do you mean?”
“Your similarity to her isn’t just about character,” he told me. “You resemble her a lot, too.”
I felt my stomach tighten as I realized this was my opportunity. This was the perfect time to tell him. And yet, even as the words slipped onto my tongue I knew I couldn’t bring myself to say them.
“I see it, too,” I said, glancing over at her picture on the wall behind us. “Would it be too egotistical now to admit that I think she’s beautiful?”
Jake smiled. “No, that would just be truthful,” he said. “Daphne was a beautiful woman. And you are, too.”
Jake looked down at our entwined fingers. He pulled my hand up and kissed it gently. “I was scared to get close to you,” he admitted in a voice steeped in vulnerability.
I felt myself leaning into him, craving his body. “Because of Daphne?”
“Yes and no,” Jake said. “It’s complicated.”
“I don’t mind; explain it to me,” I encouraged.
“I felt guilty,” he admitted finally. “For wanting you, for being attracted to you. And for a second there, I was scared that the only reason I was attracted to you at all was because of your resemblance to Daphne.”
I felt my heart constrict for a moment, hoping against hope that he saw something in me that had nothing to do with Daphne, at all.
“But over the last couple of weeks, I’ve realized something,” Jake said. “You’re not Daphne—no matter how much you may resemble her, you’re not her. And, I’m actually glad. Because I also realized that I’m still attracted to you. I still want to be with you.”
I felt a sigh of relief escape me, and I smiled instantly. “Thank you for saying that.”
“I hope that doesn’t scare you.”
“Are you kidding?” I said. “You have no idea how happy that makes me. I had a rough childhood. My family was… Well, they weren’t really a family, at all. My mother was nothing more than a mistress, and I was the result of their decades-long affair. But these last few weeks, spending time with you and Noah, has made me feel like I was a part of a family—and you have no idea how much that means to me.”
Jake listened attentively, and then he leaned in and kissed me softly on the lips. “It means something to me, too,” he said.
Then suddenly, before I could catch my breath, he had grabbed me by the hips and pulled me onto his lap so that I was straddling him tightly. His hands were on my hips, and my ass, and I could feel how hard his cock was through his pants. I responded immediately, and a burst of desire rushed through me. It was so strong that I moistened instantly and I felt my body pull in closer to Jake.
“I thought you wanted to take things slow?” I asked.
“We’ve taken things slow enough,” he said, slipping his hands up my skirt. “I want you, and I want you now.”
“Right here?”
“Yes.”
I wanted him, too; my body ached for his. But still, I looked back over my shoulder cautiously. “What about Noah?”
“He’s sleeping.”
“He could wake up.”
“Then we’ll just have to be careful,” Jake said as his pushed down my panties.
I let out a little gasp as his finger slipped inside me. He fingered me slowly at first, getting me all hot and bothered, and then he slipped another finger inside me and pushed harder until I was falling back, flat across his carpet. He settled himself on top of me and pushed open my blouse. Skillfully, he removed my bra and started teasing my nipples until I was writhing beneath him, trying to keep myself from screaming.
“I want to feel your cock inside me,” I gasped at last, unable to handle his teasing for much longer.
Smiling with satisfaction, Jake pushed inside me, and I had to bite my lip to keep from moaning loudly. He fucked me hard against his soft, carpeted floors. And all I could do was grip the furniture around me and try to control my screams.
Every time I managed to master some semblance of control, Jake would change positions, and I would find myself fighting to gain control again as a new bout of desire threatened to defeat me.
He fucked me from the back and from the side. He had me in seven different ways. His hands were experts. They raged around my body, exploring every inch of me. The first orgasm was intoxicating, the second one was unexpected, and the third one had me stuffing my hand in my mouth to block out the screams.
In the end, I didn’t succeed. I let out a bursting cry as I came for the last time, and even Jake moaned in defeat as he finally came, too.
It had been an arduous half an hour of lovemaking, and we were both shaking and sweating and gasping for breath. I had never experienced anything quite as powerful before, and I couldn’t believe that sex was like that for everyone.
“Can I ask you a question?” I asked as I leaned against his chest.
“Sure.”
“Is sex always that insanely satisfying?”
He smiled. “You were insanely satisfied?”
I blushed a little and hid my face in his chest. “Maybe.”
He let out a low laugh. “No,” he admitted. “It’s not always like that. In fact, it’s quite rare for it to be like that. I’ve never experienced anything quite as strong myself.”
I felt a bubble of happiness and pride at his words. Was he indirectly telling me that I was the best sex he’d ever had? Did this mean that our connection transcended the connection he had shared with Daphne? I hoped it meant that we had a shot at a relationship that was just as strong.
“Neither have I,” I said teasingly.
Jake laughed. “Considering I’m the only man you’ve ever been with, I don’t quite know how to take that.”
“Take it as a compliment,” I said. “You’ve ruined me for other men.”
Jake smiled. “It can’t have been that good then,” he said softly. “If you’re thinking of other men.”
I pushed myself up on my elbow and looked down at him. “I’m not thinking of other men,” I assured him. “I only ever think of you.”
He smiled. “I have a confession to make,” he said softly.
“Tell me.”
“I think I’m falling for you, Kristen,” he said.
I felt ecstasy and fear in the same breath. And instead of confronting either emotion, I leaned down and kissed Jake until I managed to chase the guilt from my mind.