Chapter Seven
Celia felt as light as a feather as James swept her up, carrying her up to his room like a bride. She marveled at his strength as he took her into his chambers. She knew that she was an independent woman who had been on her own for years, but right now, there seemed to be no harm in feeling small and safe and oh so treasured.
“Why did you never tell me that it was your first time?” he murmured, dropping soft kisses on her neck. “And after all these years, I never suspected—”
“I thought you knew,” she said, “at least at first, and when I realized that you didn’t... Well, I guess I was embarrassed. I was afraid that you thought that I was naive or bad at it, any number of things. I didn’t want you to think less of me.”
“I never could,” James promised. “Not if you had no men before me, not if you had a dozen.” He lay her down on the expanse of his bed. Underneath her, the silk coverlet was smooth and cool, but it warmed to her quickly. He stood over her like a conquering hero, and she laughed.
“You make me feel like some kind of war prize,” she murmured, and James purred in pleasure.
“I would defeat armies for you,” he said. “And if I have done so, beautiful girl, believe me when I say that I would not allow you to be dressed. At all.”
She barely registered the words he was saying before he reached for her clothes. She had always known how very strong James was, but she was unprepared for the rough ripping sound as he tore her dress from her body. For a moment, she lie stunned in the shreds of her clothes, and then she felt a hot rush of pleasure pulse through her. She fumbled with her own bra as he tore her panties away as well, and then he was coming over her, his clothed weight baring down on her nakedness.
She was certain that she had never felt so vulnerable before. She could feel how rough his trousers were against the baby-soft skin of her inner thighs, and his mouth roved hungrily over her throat and her collarbones before descending down to her chest. There was nothing to stop him from suckling first at one breast, and then the other, bringing her nipples up to aching points. Then he simply sat back on his heels, looking at her naked body with that same fierce intensity.Suddenly, Celia thought of all the changes that had happened to her since they had met. She knew that she looked well enough in her clothes, but the marks left by bearing a child were mostly hidden by her clothing. She suddenly felt aware of every stretch mark, of the softness of her belly and the roundness of her breasts. Her hands moved to cover her body, but James pinned them down by her sides.
“Never do that,” he rumbled, his eyes fierce. “Never cover yourself from me. You are too beautiful for that.”
In that moment, she felt like the same tongue-tied girl who never dreamed that a man like James might look at her want her. She could cry out from how good it felt just to be wanted, but then James was standing up and stripping his fine clothes off. Her mouth went dry as she took in the sight of his body. In her memories, he was a handsome man, but now to have the real thing in front of her, she knew that her memory had played her false. There was something incredibly masculine about James’s body, something that made her feel all the more feminine. She loved the contrast between the two of them, and when James returned to the bed, she reached for him instinctively.
“You are going to have to be patient, my darling,” he rumbled. “I have wanted this ever since I laid eyes on you at that damned stained-glass show. You are going to have to wait just as I have.”
She started to offer him a quip about waiting in her own room, but then his mouth closed over hers even as his hand drifted between her legs. The kiss was hot and almost punishing, his tongue slipping between her lips with a decisive domination. Below, his hand was stroking her gently, parting her folds to find the heat between.
Sooner than she would have thought possible, she could feel herself grow wet and wanting for him. It was as if her body, even two years later, remembered what he could do to her and how good he felt.
“Oh, James, please...”
“I think I told you you were going to have to wait,” he teased, and then he shifted downwards.
She immediately missed his kiss, but his mouth was traveling down her throat, over her sternum and over her belly. He especially took his time kissing her soft belly, running the very tip of his tongue over it and murmuring with pleasure. She gave herself up to it, her fingers tangling in his dark hair.
Then James’s talented mouth moved down below her belly, and after a moment Celia parted her legs for him. There was something inevitable about it; the fire between them would not let her bar him from any part of her. He belonged to her just as she belonged to him, and when they were inflamed with passion for each other, there were no other truths.
James parted her legs, and she realized he was looking at her, his gaze so intense that it was nearly burning. She closed her eyes, turning her face away, but his hands came up to stroke her body comfortingly.
“You are so very beautiful to me, Celia,” he murmured, and then he started to kiss her.
James’s tongue slid along her folds, tracing first up and down her slit. She shivered at how he felt exploring her opening, but then he shifted up so that he could mouth the very apex of her pleasure. At the first pass of his tongue over her clit, Celia’s back arched and she cried out. Then his hand was over her belly, keeping her still and stable as he worked his magic.
She could feel the air become perfumed with her desire, could feel how slick and warm their bodies were together. She might have been embarrassed at the sounds she was making, but the pleasure he was giving her forbade any other kind of awareness. Her body was tense and vibrating like a bowstring pulled back, and then with sharp sensation that was almost a snap, she toppled over the edge.
She dug her fingernails into Jame’s shoulders, and her legs came up to wrap around his waist.
“Oh! Oh James, please, please,” she cried out. She could not get any other words out, but her meaning was clear. She needed him. She needed him so badly, and he gave her what she had desired from the first time she saw him.He pressed the flat of his tongue straight against her clit, drawing her climax out until she felt as if she would die. He was the only stable force in a world that was rocked by sensation.
James didn’t move again until she stilled, and even then he was gentle. He pulled back, drawing her hands down. His eyes were bright, however, and the moment she could nod weakly at him, he drew her into his arms.
“I wish I could only give you pleasure after pleasure,” he murmured, hauling her up over him, “But God, Celia, I can’t be that generous, not with you; not when we have only found each other again.”
She sighed with pleasure when she found herself straddling his thighs. Even on his back, there was nothing vanquished about James. She took in the sight of him on the rumpled sheets, and she knew that she she had never seen anything quite so beautiful.
“I want you, beautiful girl,” he murmured. “Do you want me?”
She knew that even if he were desperate for her that he would not continue without her consent. In this moment, however, there was nothing in her mind but a deep and abiding yes, just for him.
“More than anything,” she assured him, and his hands closed over her hips.James lifted her up as if she weighed nothing, and then she was positioned over his cock. She could feel the blunt tip of it slide over her hot folds, almost teasing, but neither of them could stand to be teased much longer.
“Please,” she whimpered. “Please...”
He brought her down on top of him with a triumphant cry, and he did not stop until they were as close together as two people could be. She cried out at the feeling of being utterly filled with him, and as the waves of pleasure washed over her again, he started to move.
She couldn’t quite tell if he was bringing her down on him or whether he was rising up to meet her, and in the end it didn’t matter. It was riding, but it was like riding a dragon, being lofted high into the air, only to be brought down again, and as they moved together, their bodies matched in a perfect harmony, she could feel the tension rising in her again.
“Oh, James, I think I...”
His face was dark with need, but he nodded. “I want you to,” he growled, and she shut her eyes, concentrating on the heat that radiated from where their bodies were joined. He was relentless, but so was she, and she could feel her hair falling down over her face as she gave herself to the pleasure.
Her second climax was smaller, sweeter than the first. She was bathed with heat just as James’s hands tightened on her hips. As she opened her mouth to cry out, he brought her down hard on him one more time.
James’s cry when he found his own peak made her groan, and then they were shaking together. Bonelessly, she fell over his chest, feeling the way shudders of pleasure rippled through her body and his. They felt like they were going on forever, and in the depths of it all, Celia wanted forever with him, not just in their bed but in all things.They might have wanted the pleasure to last forever, but at last, James had to roll to his side, pulling from her with a tenderness that made her heart ache a little.
“How are you, pretty thing?” he asked, and for some reason, Celia felt tears fill her eyes. James reacted as if someone had struck him over the shoulders with a whip, freezing for a moment before drawing her into his arms. “Oh God, Celia, I am sorry, are you all right? I did not mean for—”
She buried her face in his chest, letting the tears come. She knew she wasn’t sad, but there was so much emotion in her that the moment that it had come out. Finally, when they slowed, she was able to pull back a little, smiling tremulously at James.
“I’m sorry,” she said, “I don’t know why that happened.” James frowned, looking a little uncertain. It occurred to her idly that that was not something that James felt very often. He was a man who had built his life off of being sure.
“Can you talk to me about it? Did I do something wrong?”
“Not at all,” she promised, snuggling back into his arms. “I think it was just very intense. It caught me by surprise.”
“‘Very intense.’ I think I can deal with that.”
“Intense isn’t bad, not at all,” said Celia with a sigh. She stretched out a little, but she found herself unwilling to drift too far away from James. James, at the same time, seemed unwilling to let her drift too far, either.
“Tell me if I did something wrong,” he said, and she looked at him, startled.
“Not at all! I wanted all of that.”
James nodded, seeming to relax somewhat. They lie together in the bed in silence, but there was nothing strained about it. It made Celia think of the days when they had been together, of course, but there was more to it than that. There was something new and growing between them, and to her, it felt oddly fragile. She was just wondering if she should offer to leave when James spoke.
“I should never have left two years ago,” he rumbled.
Celia blinked. “You told me that you had to, and I took you at your word.”
“I thought I had to,” James corrected. “I thought I had to do many things. I saw an opportunity to accrue more wealth, and more power. At the time, I thought that it was necessary. I did not see what that cost me.” Celia realized what he was saying. Tentatively, she reached out to touch his hand. When he squeezed it tightly in his, she was startled to feel him tremble a little.
“It cost you time you could have had with Maisey,” she said softly.
“It cost me that, yes, but it also cost me you. The more I look at it, the more I see the truth. You are worth far more than whatever deal I was chasing, and I am sorry. I am so sorry that you were ever afraid of being a single mother, and I am so sorry that you ever thought I did not want you.”Celia’s head spun. It was as if the adrenaline from their lovemaking and the vague spaciness that came with jet lag had all fallen together to make her feel as if she was tipping into the rabbit hole. These were the words that she had always wanted to hear in her secret heart of hearts. However, somehow, in all of her vengeful imaginings, she had never thought that James would sound quite so hurt, quite so heartbroken. Now that it had finally happened, she wanted to spare him.
“James...”
“Please,” he murmured. “Let us sleep for now. Tomorrow we can talk more tomorrow, I think.”
Celia felt that this was a conversation that needed to be continued, but she had to admit that he had a point. Now that everything was still, she could feel herself slow down. In a few more moments, she would likely be snoring, but for the moment she was still fighting.
“Should... Should I leave? Go back to my own room, I mean?” The question wasn’t a real one. She knew that as soon as she uttered it. He had shown her a room that was meant to be hers, where her clothes would go and close to Maisey’s. From the moment that he took her into his arms, however, she knew that he did not want to her to sleep there.
“Of course not,” he said, and she relished his outrage, his possessive tone. “I want you right here, with me.”
Celia nodded, burrowing closer to him. She knew that that was more or less what he would say. She simply needed to hear it again.