He somehow managed to push my exhausted body onto the jetty before hauling himself from the water.
“Come on,” he said, scooping me up in his arms. “Let’s get you dry and in the warm. Which one is yours?”
I pointed a shaky finger at my cabin of terror—I didn’t have the energy to formulate words.
He carried me straight into the bathroom, put me down on the floor, and started to run a steamy hot bath. My body shivered and my teeth chattered as I realised how cold I was now I wasn’t otherwise distracted.
“Clothes off,” he said.
I looked at him with puppy dog eyes. The realisation of having to strip naked in front of him had me feeling awkward and out of place. I frowned to myself as I struggled to understand why this was such an issue for me given our past history.
He smiled, stepped forwards, and tugged at my top. “Come on, Ky. It’s nothing I haven’t seen before. You’re cold and you can’t stay in those clothes.”
I glanced down at the floor and nodded. I still made no move to remove my clothes. I did nothing when he moved my frozen limbs for me and stripped me naked.
He pointed at the swirling hot water rising in the bathtub. “In.”
Glancing at the growing mountain of bubbles, I lost myself in a world where nothing was complicated and everything was simple. I let my mind wander away from my current problems, which seemed like they were in a completely different universe to me at the moment.
I was so mesmerized and entranced in my own thoughts, I barely registered him picking me up and putting me in the bath until the scorching hot water warmed through my muscles.
“Ouch,” I said, attempting to jump back out.
“It’s not hot,” he said, giving me a gentle push back down. “It’s only because you’re so cold. Sit and warm up.”
I resigned myself to his instructions and slowly slid under the boiling bubbles. I didn’t even have the energy to point out he was also dripping wet and cold. The water was like a blissful blanket encasing me in its warmth. Once the searing hotness disappeared, I found myself leaning my head back and closing my eyes to my current hell hole of a life.
“I’ll get the fire going, okay?” he said.
I nodded and smiled. A kiss grazed across the top of my head before I heard his footsteps disappearing.
Once the water began to cool, I hauled myself out of the peacefulness and wrapped myself in one of the huge white fluffy towels. I wandered out into the bedroom/sitting room and was met with a wall of heat as I rounded the doorframe. I could hear the crackling of the logs as the flames licked them, scorching any wetness hiding inside, drying them out instantly.
“Better?” he asked.
I nodded, noticing how gorgeous he looked sat in the big red armchair facing me. He’d changed his clothes and was now in a grey woolly jumper and a pair of faded denim jeans. He looked perfect with his hair not gelled and just left freely to ruffle itself to its own shape.
I sat down in the chair facing Paul, the roaring heat from the flames next to me heating my skin. I looked to the window to see if it was dark but noticed he’d shut the curtains.
“What time is it?” I asked.
He leaned forward and placed a hand on my knee. “Just before three.”
“Ash should be back by now.”
“They are back. They came back whilst you were in the bath.”
“I’m guessing he didn’t knock for me?”
Paul drew his lips into a sympathy smile before shaking his head.
My heart dropped, melting away in the heat from the fire. I couldn’t understand Ash right now. Why was he being like this?
“Do you want to tell me what’s been going on?”
Slowly, my heart pieced itself back together before it began racing away like a herd of thoroughbreds on a racetrack.
I nodded as my eyes strained for more tears but there were none to give. Slowly, over the next several minutes, I managed to form comprehensible sentences and tell him the complete story. When I reached the parts about my dreams, I struggled to swallow the rising lump in my throat but stressed strenuously to him I truly believed it was him I was dreaming of. Even though we weren’t officially together, I still felt like I’d cheated on him in some way, and given his confession of feelings for me, I didn’t know how he would take it.
I noticed the tension in his face and the straining of his neck muscles as he struggled to listen to the ending when I told him it was Tim.
“How could you not know?” he whispered. “Surely I touch you differently to…him?”
“I don’t know. I thought it was you. I wanted it to be you.”
My heart skipped several beats at this last admission. Was I so hung up on him I had believed so desperately another man’s touch was his?
“Okay,” he said, nodding. “I understand. But he didn’t…?”
I shook my head, sending a tear flying through the air as I did so. “I don’t think so. I don’t remember us actually having sex in my dreams. I mean when I thought it was you and me.”
“Okay,” he said, patting my knee. “The important thing is you woke up at the right moment.”
I forced a smile and nodded. “Do you believe me?”
“Of course I do,” he said, sliding down from his chair and kneeling in front of me. He reached up and placed a soft hand on my cheek.
A wave of relief washed over me as I heard his words. I closed my eyes as I forced back my tears of joy. He wrapped his arms around me, squeezing the life out of me. I found myself giggling as I thought of how sensitive he could be but it took something drastic to bring it out in him. The irony wasn’t lost on me that I wished I could merge him and Scott together so I had raw passion with a sensitive, gentle side, but here it was; it just took me having a complete meltdown for it to show through.
He asked me what was so funny, and I found myself telling him. Amusement danced all over his face. “Did you think I was just some emotionless Neanderthal?”
I grinned in response.
“You have no idea how I feel about you.”
I gulped and struggled with an answer when a sharp banging on my door broke the moment between us. Paul answered it.
“Hot Stuff.” Ash’s voice came through the open doorway along with a draft of cold air. “I thought you were going to call me when you got a flight booked?”
“I did one better and got on the next flight out.”
“Good man,” Ash said, patting him on the shoulder.
I looked up at Ash, hopeful he had calmed down.
“Are you going to be sociable today?” he asked me.
I sighed and looked down at the floor.
Paul stepped in for me. “I think you should lighten up on her. She’s grieving just as much as you are.”
“As is Tim. All of our emotions are sky high, Paul, but it doesn’t mean she has the right to start accusing people of things such as rape. I mean come on, he was married to our mum for goodness sake.”
“I know what you’re saying, Ash, but I really don’t think she’s lying. Why would she? She’s far too upset about it all for it to be fake. I believe her. I trust her.”
Ash snorted. “No. You’re just following your dick.”
I flickered my eyes across to Paul. A muscle in his neck twitched, his face hardened, and his body visibly stiffened.
“You know if you carry this on, he’s going to sue you for slander?” Ash said to me, pure venom dripping from his voice.
“What? I don’t have anything to give him.”
“Well, then I suggest you start grovelling to him. Unless you want to lose your house.”
I choked back a sob and sunk back in my chair. “This is exactly what he wants.”
“Ky. Please, come on. You know I hate arguing with you. We should be supporting each other at the moment, not be at each other’s throats.”
“Exactly my point,” I replied, sitting up and facing him. “You should believe your sister not some guy you’ve met a handful of times.”
“And what am I supposed to do if I do believe you? I can’t do anything. I can’t change anything that’s happened.”
I snorted at him. “Is that your defence? Seriously? You can’t do anything so you’d rather accuse me of lying? Especially after the week I’ve had?”
He stepped closer to me and knelt down so we were at eye level.
“That’s my point, sweetie. I think this is just everything from Scott and Molly surfacing itself in the wrong way. I think you’ve seen Tim’s friendliness as something it isn’t.”
“Friendliness?” I said. “Friendliness? Do you call looming over a naked girl in bed friendliness? Do you call telling her to imagine it’s a fella from back home friendliness? Do you call touching her up in the night fucking friendliness?”
I was so mad as I shouted at him, I thought my eyes were going to pop out of my head. I could feel the heat rushing around my face. I had little energy left after not eating for two days and one rant at Ash zapped me to zero.
Ash fell quiet as I finished my little outburst. I definitely wasn’t upset now, I was just mad—absolutely seething, hopping mad.
“Why didn’t you tell me that?” he asked.
“When did you give me the chance to?”
He fell silent for a moment. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “Tell me what happened.”
“Why should I? You’re not going to believe me anyway.”
“Ky,” he said, reaching forwards to touch my arm. “I want to hear what you think happened. I want to know the full story.”
“What I think happened? Are you taking the piss? I know it fucking happened.”
“Okay, okay, just calm down,” he said, standing back up. “Look, I’m sorry, okay? When you’re ready to tell me what happened, come and get me.”
I scowled at him, flopped back into my chair, and ignored him. I heard his retreating footsteps before he said his byes to Paul and disappeared once more.
“You okay?” Paul asked, rubbing my legs as he resumed his position in front of me.
I nodded.
“You hungry?”
I shook my head.
“When did you last eat?”
I said nothing, full well knowing what he was going to say.
“Come on,” he said, pulling me up from my chair. “Dressed. Food. We need to talk.”