Joe
I grab two pairs of jeans, a couple of t-shirts, and socks and underwear, stuffing them in my overnight bag. I shove my shaving kit that also has my shampoo and body wash in there on top of my clothes. The box of condoms on my bed taunts me. Is this really what I want? To go out and have random sex with women I don’t know? Before Chloe, I’d have no problem, but now—shit, now I don’t know what I want. I’m only making this trip because Chris, one of my good buddies from back in the day, begged me to come, and my dad thought it would be good for me to get out.
We’re going up to Atlanta to hit some bars and see some bands play. Chris has made it his mission to get me laid and out of this perpetual funk I’ve been in. I never told him about Chloe or the baby, which means he has no clue why I’m in the funk.
My mom has been hovering like crazy, and I know she means well, but I’m fine, or at least that’s what I tell everyone. She’s tried to encourage me to date or at least meet new people, but it hasn’t interested me. Not when a raven-haired beauty seems to monopolize all my thoughts. Truth is, I’ve been torturing myself every day for the past month listening to every single voicemail that Chloe’s left me.
I could hear the regret and the sincerity of her apologies in each message, but I just wasn’t sure about what I was going to say. Then more and more time went by, and I just assumed it was too late. Especially since last week, her calls stopped coming. I can’t say I blame her for not calling anymore. I wouldn’t if I were her.
The roar of motorcycles outside lets me know that Chris and the boys are here. I throw the strap of my bag over my shoulder, and on the way out I grab my helmet, riding glasses, and leather jacket just in case.
I greet everybody and walk over to my Dyna Glide. First, I shove my leather coat into my saddle bag and bungie my bag to the back of my bike. The sun is shining down on me as I strap my low-profile dot helmet on and my aviators. As soon as my bike starts, the familiar rumble makes my stress just disappear.
As soon as we hit I-75, I’m able to hit the throttle, and then it’s smooth sailing. The wind in my face and the sun shining down on me are the perfect cures for the case of the blues I seem to have.
We hit Atlanta shortly after three, so we head over to our hotel. We splurged and got a couple of suites with two rooms just in case we brought anyone back. Plus it’s not often that I can get away like this for the weekend.
We decide to get ready and then go grab dinner before heading over to the Tabernacle Theater for the concert. It’s all local bands that were voted on by their fans. It’ll either be amazing or it’ll suck. Obviously, I hope it’s the former, because that would really suck to get that kind of opportunity and then to fucking blow it.
I check myself out in the mirror. My black hair is shaved close to my scalp on the sides and a little longer on top. My face is covered in a light five o’clock shadow so I just trimmed it up a bit. I’m wearing a black button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up on my forearms. It’s tucked into some boot-cut jeans. I slip on my black motorcycle boots. I dab a little cologne on and then head out into the living room.
***
Leaning against the bar, I scope out the women. There’s a lot here tonight. I take a swig of my beer while hoping that one of these women piques my interest enough for me to take her back to the hotel. With a sigh, I head back over to where my group is seated. A few women have been circling them, hoping to get invited over.
I see, as I walk up, that Chris already has a cute little redhead in his lap, their heads real close as they talk. Leaning against the tall table, I wait for the next band to come out.
“Hi.” I turn my head and spot a really cute blonde standing next to me. I feel no interest whatsoever, but maybe if I fake it, it’ll naturally kick in.
“Hey. I’m Joe.” I hold out my hand to her.
“Hailey.” She places her soft hand in mine. “Are you from around here?”
I shake my head. “South Carolina. Just up here for a guy’s weekend. You?”
“Born and raised in Athens. What have you thought about the bands so far?” She leans against the table and smiles up at me.
“They’ve been great.”
“The next band you’re really going to like. They’re called Beautiful Rage. They do a lot of covers but put their twists on the songs.” She turns to look at the stage and then back to me. “Oh…here they come now.”
The stage is dark, but I can see people moving around. The lights in the whole place go down, and everyone stops talking. All eyes are on the stage, waiting to see what’s happening.
A lone female voice starts carrying through the speakers, and I’m mesmerized. Her voice is raspy yet melodic. I recognize the lyrics. The song is from that vampire movie that Abby used to make me watch with her.
Her voice fades, and the crowd starts cheering and clapping. The energy is explosive, and just as the lights kick on, the instruments start to play. When the spotlight shines on the singer, I’m struck speechless. I’ve heard Chloe sing before, but right now I’m in serious awe. She’s mesmerizing, and as I look around, it’s easy to see I’m not the only one.
The song ends, and she grabs the microphone out of the stand. “How y’all doing tonight? For those of you who don’t know us, we’re Beautiful Rage.” People scream and clap. “Let’s say we cut the chitchat. Are you ready to rock?” she shouts into the microphone.
She’s wearing an old and faded Mötley Crüe t-shirt that hangs off one shoulder, exposing the creamy expanse of her skin and the elegant line of her neck. The shirt is tied, showing off her small waist. The jeans she’s wearing are old, worn, and faded. They mold perfectly to her ass and make my dick hard.
Hailey tugs on my arm and leans toward me. “I work with the singer. Her name’s Chloe. She’s so talented, but she’s pathetic.” She doesn’t notice my body stiffening. “She was pregnant but lost it. She’s in my sister’s support group, and she just goes on and on about hurting the dad or some shit. My sister says she’s a fucking bummer. I told her about the group because I was trying to be nice, but God, pathetic much?”
I swear it’s taking all my self-control not to lose it on this bitch. It would kill Chloe, no doubt, because I’m sure she’s going to the support group to heal. “That’s not very nice.”
She doesn’t even have the decency to look embarrassed or remorseful. “You don’t know this girl. Our boss loves her…counts on her more even though I’ve been there longer. Then she’s pregnant and again everyone is up her ass, but then she loses it. I figure I feel bad, bad enough that I’m nice to her. I share that my sister has a group that could help her. Ugh…fucking loser.”
“Can you excuse me? I’m running to the bathroom.” I make my escape, and Chris looks at me with questioning eyes. I just shake my head and keep moving. On the opposite side of the room, I grab a beer and find a spot to stand. She looks so fucking beautiful up there. I can see why their band was nominated; they have an amazing stage presence.
They sing three more songs, and then they’re done. I make my way toward the side of the stage. I need to see her, to talk to her. Fuck, I need to hold her. The security in this place is lacking, because I easily slip past the two guards that are back there.
I reach the lounge, and there are people everywhere. I recognize a couple of the bands that have already played, but I don’t want to talk to any of them. My eyes drift around the room until I spot her. She’s sitting on a bench by herself staring out the window.
“Oh no. You’re not fucking here.” I turn to see Eli moving toward me. “You need to go.”
At this point, I don’t care. He’s not going to stop me. “Eli, out of my way. You can’t keep me from her.” The look on my face must show I’m not playing, because he steps to the side. I reach her, and she must feel me walk up because she turns, her eyes widening comically.
“J-Joe? What are you doing here?” She slowly stands, turning to fully face me.
Is it just me, or is she a little thinner than before? Her porcelain skin looks even paler, if that’s possible. Without thinking, I reach out, brushing her hair back from her face. I don’t think she knows how expressive her eyes are, but it sucks when she forces her face to go blank so I can’t see the emotion in them. “You were beautiful up there tonight.”
Her cheeks turn an adorable shade of pink. “Thanks, but what are you doing here?”
“Some buddies and I rode our bikes up for a guy’s weekend. I had no clue I was going to see you, but I’m glad I am. Do you want to grab a drink or something?” We need this, whether it’s closure or something else.
“Do you think that’s a good idea? I said hurtful things…”
“I think it’s a great fucking idea. What do you say?” I wait impatiently for an answer. Even though I feel eyes on me, I don’t dare look away from her.
She nods her head. “Okay, yeah I am kind of hungry.” She picks up her bag and puts the strap across her body. “I just need to tell my brother I’m going. I’ll take an Uber or taxi home.”
“No, I’ll take you home.” My bossy tone surprises us both.
“O-Okay…I’ll be right back.” My eyes follow her movement through the crowd until she reaches Carter and Eli. Eli is staring daggers at me, but I don’t give a fuck. Chloe stops next to her friend and kisses his cheek. Although I know Eli is gay, I still don’t like his lips on Chloe. What the fuck? I’m losing it.
She comes back to me, and the girl who was just smiling at her brother and friend is gone—now she seems tense…worried.
I grab her hand in mine and lead her out of the lounge. There’s another band playing so it’s loud as hell as I lead her through the hall. I’ve had a few beers, but I’ve sipped the last few, drinking water as well. I’ll be good to drive after we eat.
Outside, she tries to pull her hand from mine, but I hold firm. We walk silently down the street together until we reach a little bar and grille. It’s surprisingly quiet in there, and we grab a table in the corner away from others.
The waitress comes by and takes our orders and then disappears. “How have you been?” She plays nervously with the necklace around her neck.
I reach across the table and pull her hand away from it. “I’ve been okay. Have you felt all right?”
She nods. “I had my follow up, and they said that when I’m ready I should have no problems conceiving children.” The waitress returns with our drinks and fried mushrooms. “Joe, what I said…God, that was so fucking mean and so wrong.” She sucks in a breath, and I hate to see her beating herself up.
I get up and slide in next to her. I hug her close as she cries into my shirt. “Shhh…No crying, okay?” She looks up at me, her blue eyes shining bright. I wipe away the tears. “I know you didn’t mean it. Yes, it hurt, and I was upset, but I forgive you…okay?”
She buries her head in my chest and nods. “Thank you for being so…so, I don’t know. Thank you for being so awesomely sweet.”
“Confession?” She nods. “I listened to your voicemails all the time. I just wanted to hear your voice. Now enough serious stuff—let’s eat.”
I choose not to move from my spot next to her. My arm finds its way around her shoulder, pulling her close into my side. I want to ask her about the support group or at least tell her what that bitch who works with her said. All of my instincts are telling me that she needs to avoid that group of women like the plague.
I don’t give a fuck that they’ve suffered too, because Chloe probably felt safe sharing her feelings there, and unbeknownst to her, they’ve betrayed that trust.
“How’s your family? I heard Violet’s having a girl.”
“Yep, everyone’s pretty stoked about it but trying hard not to get too excited in front of me.” Our daughters would’ve been close like Vi and I are. Fuck, is it ever going to stop hurting?
“Both of my dads walked around on eggshells after they told me. I just wanted to scream that I can be happy for them and sad too, you know? My God, it’s sometimes suffocating. Will I ever fully be over it? No, but don’t treat me like I’m a fragile piece of glass that could shatter at any moment.” She grabs a mushroom and pops it into her mouth. “Tell me about your job. I don’t know any cops.”
“I’ve always been on the fence about becoming one, but my sister’s husband is one, and that was what gave me the final push to do it. I’d taken criminal justice classes, which helped when I went into the academy. Whatever you believe it’s like to be an officer, it’s probably not even close. I guess it does depend on which shift you work, too. Second and third shift see more action than first.”
Our waitress brings our burgers. I hate moving my arm from around her, but I kind of need them both to eat. Conversation stalls at first while we both dig in. Chloe moans around the huge bite she just took, and I swear my dick is half hard. What is wrong with me? I should’ve jerked off earlier, and maybe now I wouldn’t have this problem.
Seeing her and talking to her again was supposed to be our chance to get closure, so why does that fucking hurt? Why does the idea of never seeing her again make my chest ache?
“This is the best burger I’ve ever eaten,” Chloe says, pulling my attention back to her. “I don’t think I’ve ever eaten here.”
We finish eating, and as soon as we slide out of the booth, she surprises me by slipping her hand in mine. Hand in hand, we make our way out of the bar. It’s ten o’clock and still warm outside. It’s the perfect weather to go for a ride.
I step in front of her. “Do you want to go for a ride on my bike?”
“Really?” I nod. “Yes, please! I haven’t been on a bike since my dad sold his. It’s the perfect night for a ride.” Her smile is radiant. I can’t stop myself before I grab her by her face and kiss her lips, slowly and thoroughly. Her tongue immediately seeks mine, and it tangles with hers.
Reluctantly, I pull away—we’re in public, and this wasn’t supposed to be what we’re doing. Weren’t we supposed to be getting closure on whatever it was that we had? I ignore those thoughts as we reach the Ritz. They only offer valet parking, but they did let us park our bikes ourselves.
I back mine out of my space and then put my stand back down. I grab my helmet and my spare, slipping hers on for her. She looks fucking sexy as hell with that helmet on. I grab her the spare riding glasses I have, and then she’s all set. When I do the same, I climb on and then hold my hand out to her. She hops on like she’s done it a million times.
Chloe wraps her arms around my waist as I start my bike. Her hands rest on my waist as I slowly pull out of the parking lot. We drive around town, and the wind kicks up her sweet scent, and it wraps around me. Her tits are pressed up against my back, and it’s turning me the fuck on. I think of anything other than Chloe or her hot body: my mom, my sisters, and Natalie.
Thank God that works. We don’t go anywhere—we just ride. We only get to talk at stoplights. She tells me about a jewelry line she’s working on and about her band. Her breath hits me in small minty puffs.
We pull up in front of her house. I take off my helmet and glasses and do the same for her, stowing them in my saddlebags.
Hand in hand, we walk up to her door. “Would you like to come in?”
With my free hand, I reach out and tuck her hair behind her ear. “Yeah.”
I let go of her hand, and she lets us into her house. We’re greeted by some angry cats. They’re both sitting next to the sofa and look at their mom with the same expression. “Hi, my babies. Are you mad Mommy left you?”
Damn if those damn cats don’t answer her, “Meow.” She squats down in front of them and gives them both scratches on the head. Ragnar stares at me like I’m scum, but maybe because in his eyes I am. I follow Chloe as she stands up and walks into the kitchen. She grabs a bag of treats and throws a couple down in front of the furry pair.
The scent of lemon hits my nose, and that’s when I see she’s adding drops of oil to her diffuser. Sadness hits me when I think about the last time I saw it. I had put peppermint oil in it while she slept to hopefully ward off the terrible morning sickness she’d had.
“Joe? Hey, what is it?” I feel her hands touch my face. “Honey, what is it?”
“I am so sorry.”
Chloe’s arms wrap around me and pull me into a hug. “I’m sorry, too. We’re going to get through this, and we’ll never forget her.” Chloe had left me a voicemail after the results from the test they did on our baby, and unfortunately there was nothing that they could find that would cause Chloe to lose her. Did I call her back and offer her comfort? No. I nursed my snit and was an asshole.
“I know, but that’s not why I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I wasn’t here when you needed me and that you had to heal alone.” She pulls back and grabs my hand, pulling me into the living room and then pushing me down on the sofa.
“Hey. It’s not your fault. I’m the one who pushed you away—blamed you for it.” Chloe places her hand over my heart, and I swear my stupid dick is twitching in my jeans. “I’ve been going to a support group, and it’s really helped.” Just the mention of that group has my blood boiling. “What?”
“Tonight, before you came out to play, a blonde came up and started talking to me. We talked for a while and then you came on. She said she worked with you. Chloe, it kills me to say this, but that bitch’s sister was talking shit about you. She told her sister stuff that you had talked about.”
Chloe moves fast, and before I know it she’s off the sofa and marching into the kitchen. Just as I step inside, she starts in on the person whom she just called. “Reggie, it’s Chloe.” Silence. “Yeah, I know it’s late. You tell that bitch, Elizabeth, that she better stay the fuck away from me. I know she’s told her sister all about what I’ve said in our group.
“That group is supposed to be a safe place for us to share our feelings in and a group that supports and uplifts each other. She’s ruined that for me, and shame on you if you knew what was going on.”
Chloe ends the call and looks at me with fire in her eyes. “I’m sorry she said that shit to me,” I say. “I wasn’t going to tell you, but the thought of you pouring your heart out to that woman, and for her to tell people, pisses me the fuck off.”
“I’m glad you did. Fucking Hailey, she’s been a pain in my ass for a while. I’m Mr. Harmon’s best designer, and he loves me, so she’s jealous, and up until recently she was always nasty to me. I am a hundred percent sure that she’s going to be nasty again.” She grabs a couple of beers out her refrigerator and hands me one. “I think we could both use one of these.” We both twist off our caps and clink our bottles together before taking huge swallows.
She grabs me by my arm and pulls me into the living room. “Do you want to watch a movie?”
“Sure.” I sit down, pulling her to sit next to me.
We settle into the sofa, her head resting on my shoulder as we scan Netflix for something to watch. Once we’ve picked the movie, Jaws, I reach over and shut the lamp off. The room is engulfed in darkness, and it’s not long before we’re both engrossed in the classic.