I shift on the bed, rolling my shoulders and curving my back. My eyes flutter open and I squint into my dimly lit room. Outside, the sun drags itself into the sky, coating everything in a dull, light. Soon, it will be morning.
Actual morning. Ugh.
Groaning, I roll onto my stomach and close my eyes, hoping to doze back to sleep. Unfortunately, my full bladder has other plans. I blow air out of my nose and kick off the blankets. My eyes remain shut and to open them is painful. It’s like my lids are desperately trying to hold up heavy slabs of concrete. Despite that, I push myself to my feet and turn toward the bathroom.
“It’s morning already?” Caleb groans, making me jump.
My eyes shoot open and I press my palm to my chest, feeling my racing heart as it pounds just underneath the surface. Right. There’s a half-naked guy in my bed and his body is insane. Gina, my friend back in Bismarck would freak the fuck out if she knew about this.
I forgot he was here. He sleeps to one side, in his own little bubble. I woke up completely oblivious to his presence. Cautiously, I glance down. Oh. Will you look at that? I still have my underwear on. It’s a miracle.
“Uh…” I blink away the tiredness that dances along my eyelids, trying to lull me back to sleep. “Kind of…”
“I have a killer headache.” He groans, pushing himself into a sitting position as he rubs his forehead.
Caleb’s hair is in disarray—more so than usual—and will someone tell me how the hell he makes sleepiness look so damn sexy? He drags his hands down his face and onto his chest. Yawning, he scratches a smooth portion of skin below his belly button before slipping his hand underneath his waistband. I laugh under my breath at the sight before me. Classy.
“My mouth tastes like ass.” He adds, grimacing.
“There’s aspirin and mouthwash in the bathroom.” I whisper with a smile. “Help yourself.”
I stroll across the room, rubbing sleep from my eyes when I feel him right behind me. I stop as I reach for the handle, its metal surface cool against my palm, and glance over my shoulder. Caleb quirks a brow at me.
“Are you going?” He asks.
“I need to pee.”
His eyebrows pull together, confused. “Okay…?”
Is he serious right now? He really doesn’t see anything wrong with this scenario? With him being in the same room while I use the toilet?
“Alone. I don’t want you in there watching me while I do it.”
He shrugs. “So look at the floor or something.”
Look at the floor? He’s kidding…? Caleb doesn’t blink. Okay. So maybe he’s not kidding. Shaking my head, I open the door and slip inside, leaving no room for him to follow me. I almost shut it behind me, leaving a crack small for me to peer through.
“Stay.” I tell him. “You can come in after I use the toilet.”
Sighing, he folds his strong arms across his chest and leans against the door frame. “Fine.”
I close the door and wait a few seconds, expecting him to kick it down.
He doesn’t.
I think it’s the first time he has respected my privacy. I thought I was going to have to lock the door, but will you look at that? His ears are functional and not painted on just for looks.
I use the toilet, ignoring Caleb’s “This is pointless. I can still hear you” comments while I do my business.
Finishing up, I amble over to the sink and wash my hands. The second he hears the sink, he opens the door, flicks on the light, and steps inside.
“Here.” I say, opening my bathroom cabinet. I retrieve the aspirin and the bottle of mouthwash. “Take this and then you have to go.”
I pop the lid on the headache pills and set the mouthwash on the basin.
“What time do your parents wake up?”
Caleb holds out his hand, expecting me to pour the pills into his palm. I peer up at him. Who does he think I am? His mother? I open my mouth to relay the comment, then decide against it, for obvious reasons.
I shrug, tipping the bottle over his palm. I tap the rim and two small, white pills fall out. “In a few hours.”
He slaps his palm against his mouth, shooting the pills into his mouth. I return the lid to the bottle as he twists the cold tap.
“How many? Two? Three?” He asks, bending low, cupping the water in his hands.
I slip the aspirin back into the cabinet. “Four.”
Caleb swallows mouthful after mouthful of warm tap water and when he’s done, he straightens his posture with a satisfied exhale. I bite back a smile as a rogue drop of water rolls down his chin.
“Good. So I have plenty of time to catch another two-three hours of sleep.”
Ha. Yeah. Right. “Not here.”
He laughs—and it’s a bit fucking loud for my liking. “Yes, Cassia. Here. With you.”
“No. Absolutely not. You’re already pushing it.”
His movements are calm and relaxed, like he has all the time in the world, as he grabs the mouthwash and removes its lid. I lean against the bench as he pours a mouthful of the minty liquid into his mouth and swishes it around. He spits it out and washes the sink, then clears his throat. Loudly.
I flinch forward. “Shush!”
“Lighten up.” He mutters, kissing my lower lip. “And come back to bed.”
With a smug grin, he saunters from the bathroom and I glare after him. Come back to bed? Does he want to get caught together?
I grab the mouthwash and pour some into my own mouth. I frown at myself in the mirror as I swish it around. My blonde hair is a mess, my eyes are heavy and my cheeks are puffy.
Come back to bed.
Fuuuck. I’ve never had such exciting words directed at me before and to be honest, I’m really struggling on a resolution here. Do I go back to bed? With Caleb? Or do I show him the door? The angel on my left shoulder fights with the demon on the right in an epic battle of good vs bad. I don’t realize until the minty mouthwash has burned the top layer off my tongue that my angel is an advocate for my parents. It preaches their beliefs:
Do not sleep with that boy.
Do not engage in sexual behavior.
Do not have fun.
Sinners don’t go to Heaven.
And my demon…well…I spit out the mouthwash and rinse my mouth with water. My demon tells me to do whatever makes me happy.
Sinners may go to Hell, but at least they’re having a good time getting there.
Blowing out an exhale, I rake my fingers through my messy hair, managing to make it look semi-decent. My blood burns under my flesh. How can I go back to sleep now? How can I leave this bathroom knowing what’s out there waiting for me? I don’t know what it is about Caleb that makes me feel so inadequate, but I can’t shake it. It’s part of the reason I said when he asked if I wanted to be exclusive with him. How can I compete with him? How will I ever keep up? I’m not blind. I know I’m not an ugly girl, but I sure as shit don’t hold a candle to Caleb and his freakish good looks. Females will always make a play for him, taken or not, and since I’ve never really dealt with jealousy before…I don’t know how I’d react. If the bitter fire igniting in the pit of my stomach at the mere thought of another girl draping herself over him is anything to go off, I’ll say my reaction won’t be good.
I smooth my palm down my stomach and grip the hem of my loose tee in my hand. Maybe I should shower and clear my head. It’s not unusual for me to take showers this early so Mom and Dad shouldn’t even stir from their sleep and I do have work in six hours so it’s not totally unwarranted. I cross the room and close the bathroom door. I’d lock it if my parents didn’t have the fucking lock removed. Yep. They even took the lock of my bathroom door. A friend of theirs suggested they do it to prevent me from ‘ringing the devil’s doorbell’ which is ‘masturbation’ to normal people.
Strolling over to the shower, I pull open the glass door and reach for the taps. As I turn the handles, cold water shoots out of the circular shower head and I slip my hand into the stream. The jets of water turn from warm to hot and I step back, pulling my shirt over my head.
My heart beats in my chest and I peer at the door and wait. Will he come in? Do I want him to? Stupid question. Of course I want him to. I just wish it were under different circumstances.
I toss my shirt to the floor and push my underwear over my knees, kicking it to the side when it pools at my feet. Holding my breath, I pull my hair over one shoulder before stepping into the shower.
Hot water blasts my skin and it feels amazing, like it’s washing away ten years of dirt even though I had a shower when I got home from Bible study last night.
Before the billowing streams fully wet my body, the bathroom door opens and in slips the man of the hour. My stomach tightens itself into a little ball as he saunters over to the shower with indecent excitement glowing in his eyes.
I tip my head, not bothering to cover the most important parts of my body with my hands.
“What are you doing?” I ask.
Damp hair sticks to my forehead and against the back of my neck as thick steam settles on my skin. Caleb grabs the top of the shower and leans forward, the muscles in his arms tightening in the best way.
“I walked here. A shower will do me good.”
Quickly, the sharp lines of his physique become muted by heavy steam as it clings to the glass. I reach up and rub at it, clearing for a few seconds. Arousal seeps into my blood at the sight of his handsome face, flipping the switch to my common sense. I don’t know what he’s waiting for. Permission maybe? I bite my tongue. I know better.
Caleb interprets my silence as approval and casually pushes his pants down his legs. I keep my stare on his as he rounds the glass and grasps the door handle in his large hand. He holds an air of indifference as he opens the door and slips inside. I back up a step, my ass pressing slight against the cold tiles. Closing the door, Caleb slips into the stream, letting it hit the back of his neck and cascade over his shoulders. God. He even looks good when he showers.
“You’re not afraid of being caught, are you?” I ask, crossing my wrists at the apex of my thighs, shielding myself from him.
He catches it with his stare and his lips twitch at the corner, but he doesn’t allow it to spread into a full smile. He flicks his gaze back to mine.
“Afraid of being caught by your parents?”
I nod and he shakes his head with a chuckle. “I’m not afraid of your parents, Cassia. I could stroll down those stairs butt naked, you still slick on my skin, and join your father for breakfast without hesitation.”
I smile. “He’s a proud owner of a gun, you know.”
“He’s a devoted Catholic and he owns a gun? Oh, the hypocrisy”
“Hypocrisy?”
Caleb grabs the pink sponge that hangs on the handle of the cold tap and runs it under the water. “Thou shalt not kill.”
“Oh. Right.”
I’ve never thought of it like that.
I reach for the body wash that hangs upside down from a steel rack in the corner of the shower. Following my lead, Caleb holds the sponge underneath the bottle and I squeeze soap into its rough surface. All I can do is watch as he runs the soapy sponge down the front of his torso and then back up again. I compare watching him now to the times I watched him at church. I imagined him naked…but not like this. I never imagined him standing in my shower, cleaning his body. How can something so casual be such a damn turn on?
“And what about your father?”
He shakes his head, running the sponge behind his neck. “God is his gun.”
“I’m not asking if he owns a gun.” I squeeze body wash into my hand. “What will he say? If he found out about what we’re doing…if he found out about what we’ve done?”
Caleb shrugs his broad shoulders, dropping the sponge to his feet. “Forgiveness is his thing.”
I frown. Even he doesn’t sound so sure about that. I run my hands over my body, washing my tummy and the underside of my breasts. It isn’t until I slide my hands into my armpits I realize Caleb is staring at me. He slips out of the water, allowing me to step in. I flinch at the searing hot jets as they burn my shoulders. Cursing, Caleb eases the cold tap, cooling the water, making it bearable against my sensitive skin. Bunching my hair on top of my head so it doesn’t get wet, I ease into the stream, letting it wash the bubbles down the length of my body and into the drain. I close my eyes and pretend there isn’t a smoking hot playboy staring at me.
It’s harder to ignore when he slides his palm across my hip and over my abdomen. My lips part and my stomach cramps of its own accord. Pleasure swirls between my thighs and I’m certain the pound of my heart can be heard over the gush of water.
“You have a beautiful body.” He murmurs, his mouth close to my ear.
I open my eyes as he shifts in front of me and glides his hand his north, toward my breast. Caleb bends low and air is stolen from my lungs as he sucks my nipple into his mouth. I shiver and almost lose my balance as he teases it with his tongue, cupping the underside of my boob gently in his hand. I blink at him through heavy lids as he pulls back, leaving me tightly coiled and ridiculously aroused.
“Where do you keep your towels?” He asks with a casual smile.
“Towels?”
His face lights up in amusement, the green in his eyes almost luminescent under the bathroom lights. “The strips of fabric you use to dry your body.”
“Oh!” I shake my head. “They’re in the cupboard next to the sink”
Caleb exists the shower, taking his tall, beautiful body with him. It occurs to me as he retrieves a towel that I didn’t look at his penis or his leg scars.
Not once.
That alone is testament to the charm of his face and the allure of his torso. One small smirk and the casual brush of a hand over his striking chest is all it takes to flood me with arousal, to convince me to go for what I want no matter the consequences.
If only it were that simple…
****
Back in bed, the damp tips of my hair are pressed against my back by the weight of Caleb’s torso. His arms are around me, his nose is buried into my hair as he rests his head against the back of mine. I feel weightless like this…I can’t think of another way to explain it. His knees bend with mine, our legs adjacent to each other until we entwine at the ankles. Tingles dance along my spine with every inhale he takes and fans into my chest on his exhales.
It’s perfect.
Caleb brought me a pair of underwear and a short, little nightgown to slip into when I got out of the shower. I called him out for going through my stuff, but I don’t think he listened to a word I said. He did express his disappointment when he didn’t find a vibrator in my underwear drawer though.
I re-entered my room after I combed my hair and changed my clothes to find Caleb resting in my bed, his eyes closed, and one arm resting on the pillow above his head. It took a lot of muscle power to keep myself moving instead of standing there, staring like an idiot. I knew I wasn’t going to be able to sleep and I knew there was no way I was going to be able to get him out of here, so I climbed back into bed with him. He woke to the mattress moving as I slipped underneath the blankets and he grabbed me tightly, pulling me into his strong arms.
Which brings me to now…
There’s a hard cock pressing into my ass and it’s too obvious to ignore. I’m not going to lie, my blood is on fire and there’s an unbearable pulse at the apex of my thighs that I just can’t shake.
My body knows what he can do to it and it wants him to do it now.
I swallow hard and shift forward, giving him more space. I tip my head back, pressing my palm to my stomach to help calm my nerves.
“Caleb?” I whisper, nudging his ankle with mine.
“Mm?”
“You’re poking me.”
A light smile touches his lips. “Ignore it. It will go away soon.”
Ignore it? How the hell am I supposed to ignore it? It’s like telling a crack addict to ignore the cocaine, water, and baking soda as it sizzles away on a spoon right in front of them.
Tucking my hands underneath my pillow, I close my eyes. I don’t know if I fall asleep or not. All I know is, when I open my eyes again, the sun is a little higher in the sky and I have a desperate need to fill my body with something. Caleb is still hard against me, but his grip on my body has loosened. I glance over my shoulder and he doesn’t make a peep. There is no twitch to his lips or a fluttering of his eyelids as I gaze at his face.
He’s asleep.
And so. Damn. Hard.
I inhale through my nose and quietly blow it out as I lie my head against my pillow and try to forget about the insatiable pulse between my legs. I’m wet, my panties are wet, and I can’t keep my head on straight.
I try to ignore it, but my entire body burns with a tension I can’t ease and it only gets worse when Caleb shifts, slinging his arm around my hip, and pulls my lower half harder against him. My chest rises and fall with air I can’t seem to hold in my lungs. At this rate, I’m going to need another shower.
I barely touch his forearm with my fingertips and he groans, pushing himself harder against me. My head spins, overflowing with thoughts and desires I want to put into action right now. I become hyper aware of his fingertips lightly touching the hem of my underwear.
Hyper.
Aware.
Pins and needles buzz along my skin, up and down my torso before settling between my thighs. I gasp as a rush of air sweeps from my lungs. My body knows how good he can make it feel and that’s all it cares about as it works hard to convince my brain to get onboard.
It doesn’t take long.
I sink my teeth into my lower lip as I slide my hand against the back of his, sliding his fingers underneath the flimsy cotton fabric that separates his skin from mine. I close my eyes and focus on controlling my breathing as I guide his hand into place. I open my thighs and his finger slips from the outer area and onto my sensitive clit. My teeth leave my lip as a subtle gasp falls from my mouth. Shit. I’ve never been so turned on. Never in my life.
Instinctively, I flex my hips, pushing myself harder against his thick fingers, and a ripple of pleasure tremors through my body.
“You fucking tease.” Caleb groans, circling the pads of his fingers and startling me.
My eyes shoot open.
Busted.
A wicked smile forces its way across my lips as I peer over my shoulder. Caleb keeps his eyes closed, but I don’t need to see them burn to know how aroused he is. It stabs into my ass, unyielding in its desire to be consumed by my body. I push against him, purposely rubbing myself against his cock. Is it normal for your blood to rush this way? For your brain to pulse like mine is? Is it normal to want it this bad? ‘Cause I want it bad.
Really, really bad.
I roll my hips and cover his hand with mine, forcing him to rub me faster. Caleb’s breath rushes out as fast and as heavy as mine as he sidles closer bringing his mouth to my ear.
“If you keep going, I’m not going to be able to keep my no sex promise.”
“No.” I whisper, a hitch on the end of the word. “Keep it.”
Removing my hand from his, I reach behind me and glide down his clenched stomach and into his pants.
“You’re sending mixed signals again, baby.”
I grip his cock in my hand, causing him to suck air between his teeth.
“Fuck. Don’t make me keep it, Cass.” He kisses my neck. “Please don’t make me keep the promise.”
I stroke him until I’m about to come, until Caleb is thrusting, fucking my hand that is now wet and slippery with his precum. Feeling him behind me, his firm body pressed against mine, his mouth on my neck, his cock in my hand, is a beautiful kind of Hell.
It’s so right…
…yet so fucking wrong.
And I don’t even care.
“You don’t have to keep it.” I tell him. “Give it to me.”
The way he curls his fingers around the hem of my panties is savage, his aggression undeniable as he pushes them down my legs.
It’s as if having my body will save his life, as if what I’m offering is the only thing that can sate him.
Removing his hand from between my legs, he lifts his hips off the mattress and shoves his pants down his legs. The absence of his skin between my thighs is bitter for a fleeting moment, until the anticipation for its replacement becomes too much to bear.
“Finally…” He groans, sliding his hand over my hip and along my stomach. “I’ve wanted this since I showed up. It has been fucking torture sleeping here with you.”
He tugs me against him with a rough grunt, pushing my upper half forward with a heavy hand between my shoulder blades. I curve my back and his bare cock slides against my ass.
Gripping my ass in one hand and my hair in the other, he lines himself up, pushing ever so against my opening. He teases me with suspense, until the same yearning that took over me last night rears its tragic head. Without warning, he slams into me and every muscle in my body clenches with pleasure.
Caleb moans, deep and loud in his throat and holds himself inside me. His body shivers, his fingers tighten in my hair, and his cock twitches inside me. In response, my blood hums, my lungs close, and my womb vibrates, eager for anything he is willing to give.
“Quiet.” I tell him, throwing a panicked glance over my shoulder. “You have to be quiet.”
He rakes his teeth over his bottom lip. There’s desperation in his eyes—desperation to fuck me as wild and as questionable as he likes and it burns brightly. Caleb inhales through his nose, and his body ceases to vibrate with uncontrollable sexual energy. Instead of gripping my ass, he caresses it and his fingers loosen their grip on my hair.
“Quiet.” He repeats with a nod.
Something in my chest flutters as a look of uncertainty flickers over his features. The second I see it, it disappears. The uncertainty was almost—dare I say it—virginal.
Chuckling, I pull away from him and roll onto my back, kicking my undies off of my feet. Caleb slips between my legs, resting his stomach against mine. His body is firmer than mine.
He plants a soft, awkward kiss on my cheek and I scrunch my nose, unable to stop the giggle from bubbling up my throat. His green stare darts elsewhere as he swallows hard and pushes into me, his hips slow and careful.
I tip my head at his obvious discomfort of being face to face in the missionary position. His attention flicks back to my face and his brows pull in when he realizes I’m watching him in amusement.
“What?” He asks, thrusting at a tempo he’s not used to.
“You’ve never had slow sex, have you?” I tease, resting my palm against his cheek.
He shrugs me off. “Sure I have.”
“Uh-huh. I’m assuming it was a while ago.”
“So?” Caleb grabs my arm and wraps it around his neck. “Slow sex is fucking weird. Tell me this doesn’t feel weird to you?”
“No.” I pull him close, crushing his chest to mine. With my free hand, I drag the tips of my fingers along his ribs. “It feels nice.”
“Nice?” He thrusts hard and I gasp at the pleasure it sends radiating through my body. “Nice is for married couples.”
I scoff. “I’m not asking you to love me or marry me, Caleb. I’m asking you to fuck me nicely.”
“Cassia…”
“It’s the only way I want it.”
It’s the only way we won’t wake my parents.
He drops his head to my chest. His hot breath warms my skin as he slides his forehead between my breasts and onto my ribs. Silence fills the room a silence I pray doesn’t drag on forever. Regardless of how nice it is having him here, I want him gone before my parents wake up.
Thankfully, a small eternity later, Caleb’s worried, green irises flick to mine.
“Just this once. All right?” He agrees. “Just know I’m not comfortable with it.”
“I wasn’t comfortable with you slipping you finger into my ass, but it happened.”
“And you loved it.”
I wrap my legs around his waist, pulling him deeper inside me. “Well, you’ll love this. It’s less demonic…more human.”
I push my fingers through his hair and force him to kiss me. He resists at first, but his weak little protest caves and he melts into me the second I flick my tongue along his lower lip.
Moaning, Caleb licks my tongue and pulls back to look me in the eyes.
“You are magic.” He murmurs, flicking his hips to an enthralling rhythm only he can hear.
The bridges of our noses are line up perfectly, the tips kissing ever so slightly. Energy crackles between us like lightning at the forefront of a tropical storm. It’s a different kind of energy than what I’ve felt from him before. He seems more focused, less erratic.
“How’s redemption road?” Caleb asks with a smile. “Still think you’re getting into Heaven?”
I groan, rolling my eyes as guilt slices through me. So much for redemption. So much for Paradise Valley being the place I make things right with the guy upstairs. If anything, I’ve made it worse. God folded on Satan’s bluff, losing the hand to a pair of twos. The winnings? My soul. Lucifer is dragging my sorry, sinful ass to Hell.
“Shut up.” I growl, pushing on Caleb’s shoulders and flicking my hips.
He loses balance and we fall from the bed. We slams against the floor with a heavy thud and I land on top of him, digging my knee into his stomach.
“Shit!” I giggle, sliding onto his hips. I rest my elbows on his torso and winces as their sharks edges press between his ribs.
“Are you okay?”
He half laughs, half growls.
“Fucking dandy.” Caleb drags in an inhale and pushes it out. “You almost broke my dick.”
I clench his face in my hand and plants kisses on his mouth.
“I’m sorry.” I tell him between kisses. “I forgot I was on the edge.”
“Well, you were.”
I plant my hands either side of his head as he glides his palms over my hips, resting his fingers on my ass.
“I guess the roll off the bed is sexier in the movies…” I say, smirking. “How is it?”
“The main thing is, it’s one piece, but if I’m being honest he’s a little low on morale.”
“Is he now?”
Caleb nods, his eyes glowing with humor and mischievousness. “Now that you mention it. I think it needs a hug…” His lips twitch. “…from your vagina—or your mouth. He’s not fussy.”
“A hug?”
He nods. “Just a little one.”
I rake my teeth over my bottom lip and squeeze Caleb’s slim hips between my thighs. How am I turned on right now? Is that the kind of person I’ve become? One who gets turned on by possible cock trauma or when someone speaks about their penis in third person like it’s a separate entity with its own thoughts and feelings? God. I hope not.
“I will blow your mind if you promise to never refer to your cock as a separate being ever again.”
“Ouch.” He grins, charmingly. “I’m very attached to him. We’ve been through a lot.”
I frown. Oh boy, penis puns. I’m such a lucky girl.
“The trouble we’ve plunged into…head first…”
I roll my eyes. “Caleb…”
“He thinks your decision blows and I fear he’s going to erect an uprising.”
Aand he’s successfully sucked the mood from the room. “I get it.”
“One more…” He laughs, pinning me against his hips. “One more.”
I sigh. “Go on then.’”
“Some might say he feels shafted by your ultimatum and is praying you come to your senses.”
I sit up, straightening my spine. “Okay. I think we’re done here.”
Caleb opens his mouth at the same time I hear the handle of my bedroom door creak. Fuck! No! No! No! NO! I slap my hand over Caleb’s mouth. My heart leaps into my throat as a panicked heat floods my body. I’m going to puke.
There’s a light tap on my door, but it allows no time to hide Caleb in the bathroom. I am screwed!
Mom opens the door and pops her head in. Her hair is tidy and her make up subtle. I wonder how I look to her? How does my room smell? Can she sense there’s a boy in here? How long until she notices the clothes thrown around my room don’t just belong to me?
“Cassia? Honey? Are you awake?”
She spots me beside my bed and I’m thankful she can only see me from my shoulders up. She has no idea my bare vagina is currently pressed against the abs of Father Andrews’ son. Please don’t let her come in. I beg God. I will say my prayers every day and I’ll even cook a meal for the next homeless dinner the church hosts.
“Uh…yeah?”
Oh, God. She knows. I can see it on her face. I’ve never been good at hiding the truth. Underneath me, Caleb’s body vibrates with silent laughter, his hands rubbing and pinching at my skin.
“I thought I heard a bang…” Mom wonders aloud, her finger curling around the door frame.
I almost broke a penis.
I glance around. “Oh, yeah. My drawer jammed. I had to kick it.”
She inches inside and I swallow hard, focusing on her floral button up shirt instead of her curious stare. FUCKING STOP!
She stops and leans her hip against the frame. “What are you doing down there?”
“Just…um…” Shit. I tuck my hair behind my ear. “Painting my toenails.”
“Before breakfast?”
“Yes. The nail polish is easier to apply…before work. In the morning.”
“Okay.” She eyes me suspiciously before nodding her head. “Your father had to leave for work earlier than expected…so it’ll just be you and me for breakfast and then I’ll take you to work. Pancakes sound good?”
The last thing I want to think about right now is food. I’m already trying to keep down an empty stomach.
“They sound great.”
With a light smile, she closes the door. I hold my hand over Caleb’s mouth until I’m certain she’s gone. Exhaling, I rake my fingers through my hair and take a deep breath, desperate to calm the rapid beat of my heart. “Holy shit that was close.”
Caleb’s slides his silky hands up my flat stomach, inching my shirt as he goes.
“I’m going to assume I’m not invited downstairs for pancakes.” He says, gliding his palms over my breasts to toy with my nipples.
They strain against his touch and ache like nothing else as he rubs them between the soft pads of his fingers.
“No.”
He feigns offence. “I feel used.”
I chuckle. This is not how this was supposed to go. I can’t believe he showed up here last night. I can’t believe I let him in, let him sleep in my bed, and allowed him to shower with me. What is happening to me?
“You have to go.”
He smirks and snatches the collar of my nightgown in his hand. With a rough tug, he pulls me forward, my chest flat against his. “I’d rather not.”
“Caleb…” I mutter, rapidly losing oxygen in my lungs.
He smells amazing.
He always smells amazing.
“I don’t know if this is worth the risk…”
“Of course it is.” His eyes flick over my face. “From the second I saw you it was always worth the risk.”
My heart stutters, stops, and picks up at an erratic pace, fluttering like the wings on a butterfly. Whether or not he means what he said, I don’t know, but it sure is nice to hear.
“And how many girls have you said that to?”
“Including you?”
Scowling, I nod.
“One.”
Again with the stupid heart fluttering. This is dangerous. His words are dangerous, like stones hiding in a block of milk chocolate. I wait for him to play it off as a joke or turn it into something dirty. But he doesn’t…and the possibility of him actually wanting to be together is realer this morning than it was when he asked me last night.
I glance at his mouth. “Do you remember what you asked me last night?”
He laughs. “I remember the harsh burn of rejection when you said no.”
“Oh, don’t be so dramatic.” I rake my teeth over my bottom lip, choosing my next words carefully. “I wasn’t sure if you meant it…or if it’s the right decision to make.”
“I meant it—I mean, I’m almost one hundred percent sure I meant it.”
I frown. “Almost?”
“I’m not an easy person to understand. I don’t even understand myself I just…I know what makes me feel good.” Caleb brushes my long, blonde waves over my shoulder and away from his face. “You make me feel good. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with that—with you—but I know I don’t want it to go away.”
Chest to chest, my heart melts into his. To be told I make him feel good and that I shed a tiny bit of light on his dark existence fills me with a warmth I can’t describe. I’m a woman of many words and yet I find myself speechless. Maybe I would like to be with him exclusively and maybe my parents can go fuck themselves if they don’t like it.
I kiss him on the mouth and as my heart drips into his, sizzling against the coals of his troubles, my feelings are realized.
Caleb Andrews is fucking mine.