One Hundred
Ayden
“I feel like I’ve known you my whole life. Why is that?” I tucked my arm behind my head. I’d never felt this close to anyone before this fast.
Reese smiled as she cuddled next to me. “Maybe it was meant to be. Do you believe in fate?”
My heart skidded inside my chest. I couldn’t believe she’d just uttered those words to me. “Funny story. My mother used to ramble on and on about fate. I never thought much about it until I met you.”
“What was so funny about that?” Reese leaned up on one elbow. Her hair fell across her face.
Strands of it brushed my chest tickling me. I gazed up at the ceiling. I could still hear my mother murmuring to herself in a drunken haze about fate bringing her and my father together then tearing them apart. “Nothing really. It was just how my mother was. Being drunk was her normal state, so when she was sober those are the times that really stick out in my memory.”
“What did she say?”
I closed my eyes for a minute recalling the way my mother looked when she wasn’t high or drunk. She was actually a very pretty, caring, kind woman then. A real mother. “It was a good day. We never had many of those. She was sober enough to take me to the park.” I could still smell the freshly cut grass and see the cherry blossoms blowing on the wind.
“I hope one of the big swings is free!” I cried breaking free of my mother’s hand.
“Be careful, Ayden!” She warned as I ran towards the playground.
The big swings were the best because then my mom could push me really high. I loved to swing as high as I could then jump off.
As soon as I turned the corner towards the playground, I could see all the big swings were taken. Defeated, I turned back to see my mom running towards me. “They’re taken,” I whispered.
“That’s okay, baby. You can play on those swings over there.” She reached for my hand.
I glared at the direction she was pulling me to. Those swings were for little kids and had a bar that fit across my chest. I hated them. They wouldn’t go high. Worst of all, I couldn’t jump from them. “I hate those kind!” I kicked the dirt.
“Ayden, now don’t behave like that. It’s a beautiful day. Let’s just have fun.” She smiled. With the bright sun shining behind her, she looked like an angel.
I was eight years old. I wasn’t a baby anymore. I was too big for those other swings, but still I didn’t want my mom to get upset. She so seldom ever played with me.
I heard the loud sound of the L train racing by in the distance. The laughter of the other children lured me to go play regardless of what swing I was on. “Okay,” I grumbled as I took her hand allowing her to lead me to the other swings. I hopped on and she pulled the bar across my chest. It fit tightly and cut into my skin. Like I feared, I was too big for the swing, but I gritted my teeth and let her push me.
“See, baby, you’re still going high.” She stood behind me and pushed as hard as she could.
I held on to the chains tightly watching the ground come at me then leaning my head back as I soared toward the sky. These swings were going higher than I thought they would.
But I still couldn’t jump off.
I watched as the kids who were on the bigger swings squeal with delight as they soared higher and higher and then jumped off. I burned with envy.
Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed the bar that the swings were hanging from was moving funny. It wasn’t supposed to move at all. I felt a sense of terror growing in my stomach. I kicked my legs in protest.
“Mom! Stop pushing!” I let my feet begin to drag the ground to stop. My eyes were glued to the other swings and the bar still moved a bit every time another child swung higher.
As I slowed to a stop kicking up a cloud of dust, my mother waved her hand in front of her face looking at me. “Ayden, what’s wrong?”
Then there was the sound of metal crashing and a loud boom shook the ground. Screams filled the air as people went running towards the swing set. Children were lying on the ground bleeding and cut. The swing set had collapsed!
My mother snatched me up out of the swing and we went running over there. Sirens came screaming into the park. I saw a child with his arm twisted completely around. He was crying in pain. Another little girl had blood running from her nose and mouth.
Horrified, we tried to help, but the paramedics pushed us all aside. After all the injured had been loaded into the ambulances, my mother took me aside and we sat down at a bench. The once beautiful day now scarred by tragedy.
“How did you know, Ayden?” she asked in a low voice.
An eerie feeling tickled my stomach. “I don’t know.” I looked up and saw the bar moving. I was going to tell you when I stopped, but there wasn’t time.” Tears welled up in my eyes.
We looked back at the twisted metal and chains that remained of the swing set. They looked tired and alone like remnants of a war.
My mother played with her rings on her finger.
I noticed the red string tied in a bow tattooed on her pinkie. I’d noticed it before but never really thought about it.
“It was fate, Ayden. You wanted to go on those swings, but they were all taken. If we had gotten here earlier, you might have been one of those children with a broken nose or arm.”
“What’s fate?” I recalled her speaking about it before, but I tried not to pay attention to her drunk ramblings.
“This.” She held up her pinkie.
“I don’t understand.”
“I got this tattoo years ago right before you were born. There’s an old Japanese fable about the red string of fate. They say that everyone has a soulmate that you’re destined to be with. An invisible red string connects you to them so that no matter where you go or where you are you’ll be with them. Fate decides what happens to you and fate connects you to your soulmate. This tattoo binds me with your father.”
“Does he have the tattoo?”
She looked sad. “He did. I’m not sure if he still does. I haven’t seen him in a long, long time. But I believe in fate and one day, I think we’ll be together again. I believe that fate is what kept you safe off of those swings.”
I pondered that for a moment. I’d noticed that little red string, but never thought much about it.
Until now.
From that day forward, whenever things happened to me both bad and good, I thought about fate.
Reese nodded. “I’ve heard that story before about the Japanese red string of fate. My mother read that to me when I was a child, too. She died when I was young. I came from the hills of West Virginia. Medical care wasn’t exactly adequate there.” The corners of her mouth turned down.
“I’m sorry to hear that, Reese.” I took her hand into mine. She and I were so connected it both frightened and excited me. I never felt this way about Sasha or any other woman. Reese had had such pain in her life yet she still found the ability to love.
“I loved that story though. The red string of fate captivated me. It’s so strange that you said that. I always found myself looking for my soulmate.” She mused entwining her fingers with mine.
Jumping from the bed, I threw open my suitcase. Rummaging through it, I found the tiny box I was looking for. It had been my mother’s. “The day that happened she gave me this. She said my father had given it to her. For a long time it was the only thing I really had from him. I carried it with me everywhere.” I handed her the box.
“It’s beautiful.” She admired the red string bow pendant turning it over and over in her hands. “What does the writing say on the back?” Reese peered at the tiny words.
“’Fate up against your will’”, I replied without even looking. I’d asked my mother the same thing. I hadn’t understood it at the time, but it was becoming clearer as I got older.
“That’s a funny saying. I wonder what it means.” Reese handed me back the box.
“I think it means that fate will always win out.” I placed the box back into my suitcase. Since I was a child, I carried that pendant with me everywhere I went. It was the only connection I had with both my mother and my father. It made me cling to the hope that one day I would find my soulmate, my fated love. “Reese, you were married before. Wasn’t he your soulmate?”
Shrieks of laughter could be heard out in the hall. I supposed that party on the 15th floor that was going on when we came up in the elevator had broken up. I could hear the clink of glasses and people stumbling down the hallway.
Reese’s eyes looked luminous in the dim light. She shook her head. “At first, I thought he was. I would’ve done anything, anything to keep him. We believed we were destined to be together. Ava warned me against him. She didn’t think he was right for me. But my will prevailed and we were together, that is, until he was arrested for the death of his ex-wife.” A pained look crossed her pretty face.
“Did he do it?” I whispered my lips brushing her ear.
She nodded tears welling in her eyes. “Yes, he did.” She blinked the tears spilling down her cheeks.
I nodded stroking her hair. Sighing deeply, I decided to share my story with her. “You know how I grew up. My mother was a drug addict. We bounced from house to house as she juggled various boyfriends. She was beautiful before the drugs stole that from her. They stole everything from us.”
“I know.” She wiped the tears from her face.
“Anyway, I grew tired of her bullshit. I left home when I was only fifteen. I got into dealing drugs, using heroin, you name it. I had a girlfriend who OD’d in my arms.”
Reese leaned up on her elbow and stroked my hair. “Oh my God, Ayden, I’m so sorry.”
I brushed her hand away. “I know that doesn’t compare to what you went through being assaulted by that asshole foster father, but it was devastating to say the least.”
“Of course.”
I leaned up grabbing a pack of cigarettes off the nightstand. I lit one and inhaled. “I didn’t grow up in luxury like Ash did. I grew up much as you did in chaos and poverty.”
“I know all this already, why are you telling me?”
“I was a heroin addict. I did time.” My hands shook as I tried to hold the cigarette.
“That’s all in the past now,” Reese assured me.
“I told you before I killed Amber’s brother, Mark.”
“Yes, you said that.”
“But I want you to understand more about why I did it. You see, when I first came to New York in search of my father I found Amber. I fell in love with her or rather I think I had an obsession with her. I treated her badly I admit that. I was sick still using heroin and full of rage at my father and my brother. I wasn’t myself. When Amber got tired of my abusive behavior, she tried to leave me. I wouldn’t hear of it. I stalked her. I even….kidnapped her.” I drew hard on the cigarette. My hands trembled uncontrollably.
Her eyes widened as she sat straight up. I guessed that Ava hadn’t told her that part. “My God,” she whispered her hand flying to her mouth.
“I didn’t mean to hurt her. I wanted to get even with Ash. He got to grow up with our father in a nice, stable home.”
“What happened? You and Ash are friends now.” Reese reached for the pack of cigarettes.
I held her hand while I lit it. “We are now, yes. It took a long time for us to make peace. Amber wouldn’t tolerate seeing me for some time even after Ash and I became friends. It wasn’t until her brother came after them that she forgave me. Amber was assaulted by her brother when she was young. He had a sick obsession with her and came to New York to hurt her and Ash. I couldn’t have that.”
Reese exhaled smoke as I stood up to grab a bottle of scotch from the bar. I poured us two glasses as she sat transfixed listening to me. “After Mark attacked them once, Ash took Amber to live in the Midwest. I knew what kind of person Mark was. I knew he wouldn’t stop until he found them. I came out to join them and it was then I vowed I would protect them no matter what.” I finished my scotch in one gulp.
“So you decided to kill him? There wasn’t any other way?” She sipped her liquor.
I shook my head. “There’s no straight talk with crooked people. He had no sense of reason. You had to know him, know Amber at that time to know how scared she was. He used to watch her as a child undress. He masturbated to her and had delusions of them being together. He was sick and twisted as fuck.”
I glanced at Reese. There was sadness in her eyes. “You don’t have to tell me about men like that. My foster father was the same way.”
I sighed heavily pouring another drink. “I had to kill him. There was no other way. I didn’t care if it cost me my freedom at the time. I wanted to make amends for everything I’d done to them.”
Reese took my hand and pressed her lips to it. “You’re a good man, Ayden. I know that. You wouldn’t hurt anyone without being justified.”
I shook my head. “I have no ill will towards anyone right now. I hope never to hurt anyone again. That’s why I agreed to help Ava do this. These spiders she’s looking for may hold the cure for cancer. Think of how many people would be helped by that.” I smiled thinking that my own father would be alive today if that was true.
Reese looked uncomfortable as she crushed her cigarette into the ashtray. Her gaze darted about the room as she signaled for me to come closer to her. “Ayden, you haven’t known your sister for as long as I have. Ava doesn’t do anything that doesn’t benefit her first,” she whispered.
“What are you saying?” I was starting to get a sick feeling of fear knotting in my stomach.
“I’m saying that…” Reese looked around as if she were afraid that Ava might hear her, “…you need to be careful is all.”
“Do you think she’s lying? I read those articles. They were by science journals. She couldn’t have possibly made that up!”
Reese shook her head vigorously. “No, no. I don’t mean that. I don’t have any doubt that what she’s saying about the spiders is true. The medical evidence supports her theory, but Ava wouldn’t be doing this for health benefits.”
“What do you mean? Money? She said she doesn’t need any.”
“She doesn’t. Look, I love Ava. She’s done a lot of great things for me and without her, I’d be lost. She’s loyal and a great friend. However, Ava is beautiful and beguiling. She’s power hungry. She lusts for control and power like no one I’ve ever seen.”
I contemplated what she was saying. “These spiders….they have something Ava wants?” I was reaching for an explanation. I had no idea what she was implying.
“Somehow they do. I don’t know how they play into her grand scheme of life, but they’re important to her.”
I felt very uneasy. I pulled Reese close to me. “Are we in danger?”
Reese’s eyes grew dark. “I don’t know.”