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Darkest Sin by Ashton Blackthorne (97)

One Hundred Six

 

Ayden

 

Later that evening after I’d calmed Reese down, I went to meet Sasha at a restaurant in the city. Reese agreed I should go alone. Admittedly, I was worried about her. I could see the pain in her eyes as I left, but I had to get things straight with Sasha.

As I strolled into the restaurant, I spied Sasha sitting alone in a corner booth. Her hair was cut shorter than I’d ever seen it just below her shoulders. Faint red highlights caught the light making her look more beautiful than ever.

“Ayden, I’m glad you suggested this place. Is it coincidence, we had our first date here or did you actually remember?”

I hadn’t remembered. “A little of both.” I smiled. Why did I say that? I should’ve just admitted I hadn’t recalled. Now she was going to assume I had some sort of romantic interest in her which I didn’t. I was only there to discuss the future of our children.

“You didn’t remember. I know you too well. It’s fine. I’m just glad you’re here.” She reached for her glass.

“You’re not still drinking, are you?”

She shot me a look full of venom. “Are you crazy? Of course not. It’s sparking water with lime. I’ve been taking good care of the babies.”

Looking down, I noticed her middle bulging even more. I wanted to touch it to see if I could feel the babies kicking. “Have you thought anymore about moving out to the coast near me?”

She brushed her hair back from her face. “That’s not what you really wanted to ask, is it? You want a DNA test.” She drummed her fingers on her glass.

“Yes, I do,” I answered honestly.

“I could pretend to be insulted by that, but it’s fair enough. We did a few threesomes with other men while we were together. I will agree to take one.”

The restaurant began bustling with people. I assumed that the Broadway matinee had just let out. Customers were being seated all around us.

“I don’t know if you knew, but sometimes DNA tests can induce miscarriage.” Sasha met my eyes.

“Yes, if you do an amnio. If you do a blood test from each of us, we should be fine.” I had been up the night before reading on my phone. I had researched everything I could find on pregnancy and childbirth. That was just the way I was. If a topic interested me, I devoured everything I could on the subject. It was also a way to keep myself from using.

“You’ve done your research. I’m impressed.” She smiled.

“Yes, I did. There’s a clinic here in Manhattan that I already scheduled an appointment at for tomorrow morning. I hope that’s okay?” The restaurant was getting warmer by the minute. Perhaps it was due to the rapid influx of people. Nevertheless, I was sweating bullets.

“Tomorrow is fine for me.”

I motioned the waiter for a drink. “Can I get you anything to eat?” The waiter smiled pleasantly.

Declining, I handed my menu back to him.

“I’ll take the Chicken Cream Cheese Wontons.”

“Very good, miss.”

After he walked away, Sasha blushed slightly. “I’m ravenous lately. I’ve had tremendous cravings.” She smiled her hands touching her middle.

“Any weird ones? Pickles and ice cream?”

She shook her head. “Not too weird, I guess. Today it’s been chicken. Last week, I did have an overwhelming craving for popcorn and pistachio ice cream.”

Laughing, I started to feel more at ease.

After we caught up on small talk, Sasha noticed I kept looking at my phone.

“So how’s your girlfriend taking this? I assume you’ve told her?”

“Of course. She saw you leaving the other night.” I sighed. “She isn’t doing well. She was extremely upset naturally.”

“Naturally.” Sasha looked down at her empty plate.

I itched to have a cigarette. I began twisting my napkin in my fist. A customer at the night table had two toddlers. I couldn’t stop staring at them. The children were with both their parents and looked so happy. The little boy was wearing a set of blue overalls and kept pulling his sister’s golden curls making her cry. “Turns out she can’t have children. She tried having a baby with her first husband.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“So was I.”

Sasha looked at her phone. “What time is our appointment in the morning?”

“9 AM.”

Sasha thought a moment as I was dying to get out of there. It was stiflingly hot to me and I wanted a smoke in the worst way.

“Why don’t you stay with me tonight? That way you don’t have to drive all the way in tomorrow morning.”

My eyes widened. Oh hell no, I couldn’t tell Reese I was staying with Sasha. That wouldn’t go over well. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. Reese would never be okay with that.”

Sasha waved her hands back and forth. “No, no, no. I didn’t mean it like that. I have a guest room you could sleep in.”

I stood up to leave throwing two hundred dollar bills on the table. “No, thank you. I appreciate the gesture, but I need to get back. I’ll meet you at this address tomorrow.” I handed her the card from the clinic.

“Fine.” She threw her purse over her shoulder.

“The test results are back. Congratulations, Mr. Blackthorne, there is a 99% chance you are the father of these twins.”

I sat back stunned by the news. I knew it was likely that I was, but to hear the technician say it made it official.

Sasha sat next to me. She appeared pleased with the news. “I won’t say I told you so. But I told you so.” She smirked folding her arms beneath her swollen breasts.

“I didn’t doubt you, Sasha, but I had to be sure.” I gave her my hand to help her up. “So, what now?” I asked as we left the clinic.

“I made a doctor’s appointment for this afternoon. You can see your babies for the first time.”

Words can’t begin to describe how I felt at that moment. I was elated yet frightened and concerned for how this would affect my relationship with Reese. Arriving at the doctor’s office, I sat anxiously with Sasha. I wanted to call Reese and explain more to her, but I just couldn’t. I had a strong urge to call Ash and Ava as well, but I couldn’t.

I just had to focus on Sasha and my babies.

Sasha squeezed my hand as we walked into the exam room. The nurse instructed her to remove her clothes and get into the gown.

“Is this normal?” I asked her. I looked around seeing the diagrams of the different stages of fetal development. The room was painted light blue with pictures of happy babies on the wall. I had to admit I’d never been in any type of exam room with a woman before. I hadn’t been to the doctor for myself in years.

“Yes. I’ve had two ultrasounds prior to this one. I made this appointment especially for you. If the DNA test said what I thought it would, I wanted you to see your babies.” Her face glowed with happiness. I still felt in shock as if it were all a dream.

The door opened and a woman standing in a white coat and the nurse walked in bringing a large device with her on a cart.

“Hi, I assume you are the father?” The doctor held her hand out to me.

“Yes, I’m Ayden.”

“I’m Dr. Katie Sullivan. It’s nice to meet you. Now are you ready to see your babies?” She smiled.

I scratched the side of my neck nodding.

“Wow, Sasha, I must say you weren’t exaggerating when you said how handsome he was!” The nurse named Melissa grinned winking at me.

I pretended I didn’t hear her. I wasn’t particularly in the mood for jokes. I just wanted to see the ultrasound. Butterflies were making my stomach ache.

The nurse pulled Sasha’s gown up to reveal her rounded abdomen. She squirted a blue gel onto her skin. She turned on the machine and rubbed the wand over Sasha’s stomach.

“Are you both ready? Here it comes.”

I watched transfixed at the screen as two tiny babies appeared. They were moving! I nearly felt faint. Tears began to blur my eyes.

“Look at the outline of his head. Now there’s hers.” The doctor traced her finger along the screen.

“That’s amazing. Look at them! They’re moving so fast it’s seems like they’re dancing!” I was so excited I could barely contain myself.

“That’s from me!” Sasha laughed through her tears.

I couldn’t stop looking. Those were my children on the screen. They were alive and moving about inside her. They were a part of me. Tears of joy soaked my cheeks. I rubbed my nose as I sniffled.

“It’s emotional, I know.” The doctor handed me a tissue.

The nurse clapped her hands. “I love this part of my job!”

I stood there transfixed holding Sasha’s hand. I couldn’t think of anything but those beautiful babies.

“They both appear healthy. I’ll just do your monthly exam now.” The nurse wheeled the machine out as the doctor finished the exam. “You appear right on track for your due date.” The doctor slipped off her gloves and threw them into the trash. She handed Sasha several tissues to clean off her stomach. “You’re doing great. Please be sure to schedule your next appointment at the front desk.” She turned to me. “Congratulations, Mr. Blackthorne.”

Taking a tissue from the box, I wiped my face.

Sasha quickly dressed then we left the office.

“My God, Sasha that was unbelievable. I have to pinch myself to realize I’m not dreaming. Thank you for letting me be a part of this.” I searched for a cigarette as we got into the car.

“Not around me, thank you.” She snapped the cigarette from me. Shit, I hadn’t thought of not being able to smoke around her.

“So many things to think of now,” I murmured. I drove her back to her apartment.

As I brought the car to a stop, I grabbed her hand. “Please move out to the Hamptons. I can get you a house just a few miles away. I’ve got one in mind. Let me pull it up for you.” I scanned through my phone until I found the house. It was a beautiful house smaller than the one I was living in now, but it still featured four luxurious bedrooms and an ocean view.

“That’s gorgeous, but I can’t let you do that. I don’t want your charity,” Sasha snapped.

“It’s not charity. This is for you and our children.” It seemed unreal to utter those words ‘our children’ and not be talking about myself and Reese. I knew she was going to be heartbroken when I told her of the ultrasound.

“I’ve made a good home for myself and the babies. This apartment wasn’t cheap and I worked hard for it.”

I knew she’d done a lot of work in public relations for prominent entertainment figures. She had earned quite a bit on her own. Still, a house in the Hamptons was out of her price range. But it was within mine, thanks to my father, I thought. I remembered my own childhood growing up without my father and how much that had traumatized me. I was determined not to let that happen with my children. “Look, Sasha, you know the position I’m in. I love Reese. I have a home I just bought near my brother in the Hamptons. I want to be a part of my children’s lives. You know how much it hurt me not to know my father. I won’t let that happen with our kids.”

She blew her nose with a tissue. “I know, but I’m not your wife or your girlfriend. I don’t know how all this can work.”

I felt frantic. Manhattan was two and a half hours away from my house. I wanted my children closer to me than that. I wanted to help take care of Sasha. She was carrying my children. “We don’t have a romantic relationship, I know, but these children have to come first.”

“That’s right, Ayden, they come first not you or me or Reese.” She stared directly into my eyes.

Her words stung me with their truth. I loathed the fact she was right. My love for my children just might cost me the love of my life.

Was I prepared to make that sacrifice?

 

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