“Shania, huh?” Damon says, typing on his laptop, trying to see what he can find about Nicolai’s girlfriend, Yana. Or ex-girlfriend. Either way, we’re hoping if we can find her she might know something.

“Yeah,” I mutter, sipping my beer. “Fucked it up, again.”

“Well, that usually happens when you fuck a woman and then tell her you could have fucked anyone, she just happened to be the closest.”

When he says it like that, it makes me fucking cringe inside. Because that is not what I meant. At all. I don’t have a way with words, to put it mildly.

“Fuck me, bro, way to remind me what a dick I am.”

“Could always say sorry,” he points out, wiggling a finger in my general direction.

“Fuck. Sorry. I don’t do sorry.”

“We know,” Finn mutters, walking past with two beers in his hand.

We’re at Slater’s place, which used to be our old house. Slater took it on when Ellie went missing and has refused to leave it since. I think he stayed here in the hopes that if she came back, she’d know where to find him. But, all is well because she found him, and they’re happy.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I throw at him, turning and following him out onto the porch where Slater, Maverick, and Koda are all drinking beer.

Scarlett, Charlie, and Ellie are in the yard, under a tree, drinking some fancy ass pink drinks and probably talking about us. They talk about us a fucking lot.

“Means you’ve never said sorry in your life, Linc,” Finn says, passing Maverick a beer and sitting down.

That hits me harder than he means it to. I know I fucked up big time when we were younger. I started dealing, fucked it all up, Slater tried to fix it and then we ended up in serious trouble. Not to mention the fact that I put Dad into rehab for his alcoholism, instead of trying to help him at home. Doing that meant I couldn’t pay the mortgage and started sinking, hence the reason for the dealing of drugs. I spiraled. And I caused a big problem for everyone else.

Finn and Damon had to live with the choice I made. They had to live with me running off the rails and doing stupid shit, only caring about myself, and Slater broken over Ellie and going off to work for a major drug dealer in hopes of finding her. We rarely saw him. And that fucking sucked, because it all falls back on me. Finn ... I don’t know what happened to Finn. Came home one night and he was different. He was always quiet and withdrawn, always broken after Mom died, but then it just went really bad.

He just ... faded away.

“Yeah,” I mutter in response to his answer, and take a sip of my beer.

“Those women down there are no doubt talkin’ about Shania,” Maverick says, giving me a side glance.

“What the fuck did you do to Shania now, man?” Slater asks, my just-slightly-younger brother, giving me a death stare.

He likes to think he’s the alpha around here.

He certainly is not.

But he can try.

Big scary fucker that he is.

He grew into one hell of a man, big and powerful. Proud of him for what he’s lived through. Haven’t told him that, either. Maybe I need to start telling people shit.

“He fucked her and then told her that he fucked her because she was the closest to him and it wouldn’t have mattered who it was,” Damon throws in, waltzing outside.

“Fuck, Damon, way to make me look like an ass.”

“You’re welcome.” He grins.

“Fuckin’ brutal, man,” Koda says, grinning at me. “I thought I was a dick.”

“I didn’t fuckin’ mean it like that,” I growl.

“You certainly have a way with words, as we’ve all come to notice,” Damon adds in again, with a shit-eating grin on his face.

“Still your older brother, Damon. Will still drop you on your fuckin’ ass.”

He waves a hand. “Try it.”

“Heard all about it,” Slater tells me. “Shania rang Ellie last night. Listened to her cryin’ on the phone about what a douche you are.”

Fuck.

It made her cry?

That stabs me in the heart. Right in deep. Because I never meant to make her cry.

Something about making a woman cry really bothers me.

I don’t know why.

I just hate it.

“Fuck,” I mumble.

“Could always go over, say sorry,” Maverick points out.

“Fuck you’re gay,” Koda throws at him.

“Fuck off, Koda. Gotta learn how to treat a lady right one day,” Maverick shoots back.

“Don’t need to be a fuckin’ pansy about it,” Koda stirs.

I smirk. “Now now, you two, nothing wrong with showing your feminine side.”

They all chuckle.

“No, seriously, bro, go say sorry. Be a fuckin’ man about it. She’s a good woman. Don’t take much to see that. And take it from me, there ain’t a fuck load of those around anymore.”

He’s right about that.

Until Shania ... I hadn’t met any. Gorgeous? Yeah. Good in bed? Fuck yeah. But a good hearted woman that you want to keep around and marry? Fuck no.

“Yeah ...” I mutter and watch as Charlie walks up to get the girls another drink.

Fucking lovely she is, with that wild red hair. Koda is one lucky son of a bitch.

“I heard you did a bad thing, Lincoln Knight.” She grins at me, her cheeks rosy from alcohol.

“I’ve done plenty of bad things, sweetheart. Goin’ to have to narrow it down.”

She grins bigger, and I grin back. Hard not to. She radiates confidence, and she’s cheeky as fuck.

“Poor Shania, she’s a nice girl, you know?”

She throws her hands on her hips now. Attitude. Nice.

“Yeah, fuckin’ a she is.”

“Then why do you have to be such a jerk to her?”

“Seen how she is with me? It’s a two-way street, lady.”

Charlie purses her lips. “You should go over there right now, and when she opens the door, grab her, kiss her so hard she can’t breathe, and then say ‘sorry’ just ‘sorry’ and then leave. Guarantee she’s going to be feeling better in a matter of minutes.”

Fuck. Not a bad idea.

“That’s if you want her to feel better,” she says, studying me. “Do you, Lincoln?”

“Stop tryin’ to see if I’m into her, Charlie. We barely say a nice word. Move along.”

Charlie grins and then swoops down and kisses Koda, long and deep, before turning and sauntering off. “Go to her house, Lincoln!” she calls.

Well, fuck me.

Maybe I should just go to her house.

We do need to get along after all.

Right?