“Please tell me you’re joking,” Lucy says, her eyes wide and horrified.

“I’m not joking,” I tell her, as I put on the underwear I was requested to wear for my first night dancing. “I’m doing what I have to do.”

“Stripping is not doing what you have to do!” she cries. “I could get a job. Quit school. We’ll be fine. You do not have to do this, Shan!”

“Yes, I do. Because you’re not quitting school, I won’t have it. You need that education. You deserve a future.”

“So do you!”

I turn and face her. “It’s fine. I’m okay with this. It’s a safe club. All I’m doing is dancing, Luce. Nothing more. Just until I have some money put aside, until we’re on our feet again. You can scream and yell as much as you want, but I will be doing this. Don’t make it harder on me, please.”

Her face—her soft, beautiful face—falls. She stares at me, with those piercing steel grey eyes, and I hate the look she’s giving me. Disappointment, frustration, and no doubt anger at herself. Because she wants to do more, and I won’t let her. Or maybe she can’t. Or maybe she doesn’t want to. It doesn’t matter; I’m doing this and that’s the end of it.

She tucks her straw-colored blond hair behind her ear and crosses her arm. Lucy is gorgeous. She’s always been gorgeous. And she’s not into guys, at all. I mean, she is, don’t get me wrong, but she has zero tolerance of them. She’s sassy, and she’s strong, and they simply do not sway her in any way. When she finds the man she’s going to be with, he’s going to worship her, because she’ll simply accept no less.

Good for her.

“I have to go,” I say, checking my watch. “It’ll be okay, I promise.”

She opens her mouth to say something, but I turn and rush out the door. Pamela is waiting outside, and I climb into her car and listen as she goes over absolutely everything to do with tonight. I have to get it right. If I don’t, Nicolai won’t keep me on. I’m so nervous I feel sick, sick to my stomach, but I keep it together. I have to switch off. In there, I have to be someone else.

I can be someone else a few nights a week.

“You ready?” Pam asks when we walk through the back doors of the club.

I nod and step inside. There is a massive dressing room, filled with about four other girls all glamming up for the night. Hair, makeup, oiling their bodies, practicing their moves. They all have the same goal, the same job. Earn money. Make men happy. Go home and try to pretend this isn’t who they are.

“This is basically where you’ll spend most of your time when you’re here. Getting changed, touching up your makeup, getting ready for the next dance. The girls here are all lovely and very welcoming. Except Yana. She’s one to watch.”

“Which one is Yana?”

Pamela jerks her head to a door, and we walk over, peeking out. From here, you can see the stage where there is a girl upside down on a pole, long tanned legs wrapped around it. Her dark hair is practically fanning out across the stage below her. She’s butt naked and has an absolutely beautiful body.

“She’s Nicolai’s favorite, the men’s favorite, and the pet of the group. She knows it, too. She’s bitchy. And mean. And she’ll do anything, and I mean anything, to make sure she keeps that title. Don’t get in her way, don’t try and be better than her, and she’ll mostly let you be. And especially do not look at Nicolai. She thinks she has some claim to him because he fucks her. We just choose to let her think that and leave her be.”

Noted.

I nod, and Pamela takes me back out and introduces me to all the other women. There are a range of them from curvy, to tall, to leggy, to petite. There are blondes, brunettes, and even one red head. They’re all gorgeous. I feel like I simply don’t compare, but obviously I do or Nicolai wouldn’t have taken me on.

“Ladies.”

We all turn mid chat and see Nicolai coming into the dressing room. Tonight, he’s wearing the same suit as he was when I first met him, and his dark hair is slicked back, making him look so damned attractive it almost hurts to make eye contact with him. He strolls through the dressing room like a god, like he knows he’s powerful, like he knows he owns these women. That he’s the top dog. That he’s the man who can make or break them.

And by the way they nod their heads and smile at him, moving out of his way, they damn well know it, too.

He stops when he reaches me, and his eyes scan over my body, down over the fake tan I got to remove all the lines, to the way my hair is curled and bouncing around my shoulders, to the way I’m waxed and oiled. I’m ready for this. At least, I think I’m ready for this. I’m not quite sure yet, if I’m being truthful. Until I get out onto the stage, I’m really not going to know.

“You ready?” he asks me. “You’ve cleaned up well.”

I nod. “I’m ready, I’ve got this in the bag.”

He studies me. “Your outfit. We’re going for innocence. Going to make a play on that. Men will love it. You’re going to go out as a sexy little librarian and take your clothes off right down to your underwear. I want you batting your eyelashes, using soft moves, putting your finger in your mouth and winking at the men. Anything that screams you’re untouched. Best part is, you are untouched so any time you’re shy or unsure that’s only going to work in your favor.”

God.

My heart leaps into my throat, but I nod anyway.

I can do this.

I can.

“Pamela is on the pole. Tonight, you dance. I’ll be watching you, don’t let me down.”

Yana enters the room now, and I see her eyes zone in on me. She’s slick with sweat from her dance, and her black curls bob around her waist. She’s absolutely gorgeous. Probably one of the prettiest women I’ve ever seen in my life. Exotic, lean, mysterious. She also looks mean. Really, really mean.

There is something in her eyes, a darkness that casts over you the second you look at her. Like one glance is going to destroy you. Like she’s letting the world know she’s ugly, and she’s not afraid of letting that ugly out. The way she takes me in, slowly dragging her eyes over my body, makes me shudder, and not in a pleasant way. Finally, she looks to Nicolai. “Didn’t know you hired.”

Nicolai looks to her. “Last time I checked, didn’t have to tell you what I was doing.”

Her cheeks go red, but not with shame, with anger. Then she looks to me. “I’m sure you’ve been told the rules, but I’ll tell you again. Stay out of my way. Do not talk to me. Do not touch my things. Do not make any contact with me whatsoever. I don’t like people. And I don’t like you. That clear?”

The hairs on my neck bristle and stand on end. I might be quiet, I might be innocent, but I have not, and never will, let people walk all over me. It is just something I’ve always had in my soul, that strength. I don’t like being spoken to like trash, especially not when I’ve done nothing wrong. If I’ve earned it, by all means, give me what I deserve. But you do not disrespect me when I’ve given you no reason to.

Also, I have a hot temper beneath the surface.

One I try and keep hidden.

“First of all,” I grind out, my voice soft, but edgy. “What makes you think that you’re important enough for me to even attempt to give a damn about what think or want? From what I can see, you’re not different to anyone else in this room. You’ve got an ass, you’ve got tits, and you’re shaking them for money. So get off your high horse and quit acting like you’re some kind of royalty. Because, girlfriend, you ain’t.”

Someone gasps behind me, then the room falls dead silent.

And my stupid temper got the better of me. On my first day. And I shouldn’t have let it. Dammit, what was I thinking? I should have shut my mouth. I’ll probably lose my job before I even start it. But damn her. Damn her to hell. Cow.

“What did you say to me?” Yana hisses.

“Enough,” Nicolai says. “Yana, she’s right. Back the fuck down. You need to learn your place.”

“My place,” she snarls at him, “is your best money earner. My fucking place is top of the fucking food chain in this place. You know it, Nicolai. You’d be worthless without my talent.”

Nicolai’s nostrils flare and he glides forward. Even though he’s angry, he’s gliding like he has full control over his composure, even at a time like this. He gets in her face. “First of all,” he breathes, his voice barely above a hiss. “You’re replaceable, Yana. Don’t ever think you’re not. I might value the clients you keep regular in my club, and I more than admire your talent, but don’t ever, not fucking ever, think that I can’t find someone just as good.”

Her nostrils flare, but she says nothing. She seems to know her place when it comes to Nicolai. She stands there, fists clenched by her sides, saying absolutely nothing. Nicolai finally turns, and when he looks at me, I swear I see something new in his gaze. Appreciation, maybe. “It’s your turn,” his voice is a low whip. “Don’t let me down.”

I nod and avoid Yana’s gaze as I turn, swallow the lump in my throat, try and calm my thudding heart, and follow Pamela out onto the stage. When we get out there, the first thing I see is bright lights. So bright it almost looks as though we’re in a room on our own. Slowly, as my eyes adjust, I see men. So many men. They’re drinking, sitting back, playing pool, chatting amongst one another. Like this is normal. Like this is every day. Like us being naked on a stage is everyday norm.

“Ladies and gentleman,” a voice comes over the loud speaker, and I recognize it as Nicolai’s, even though I can’t see him. “Tonight, we have a very special new girl on board. Not only is she insanely gorgeous and ready to rock your worlds, but she has something special about her. Something that’s going to drive you all wild. Our little Flower is a virgin. That’s right, gentleman. She’s untouched. Unmarked. And ready for the taking.”

The crowd goes absolutely wild. I take a shaky step back in my stilettos. Pamela is standing beside me, and she leans in. “That’s your cue, go and kill them, honey.”

I walk across the small platform to my stage just as the music starts. Men are screaming, literally screaming, their hands clawing at the stage, as if trying to get a touch of me. They’re all yelling at me to move and take it off and shake it. I can’t hear myself think over their screaming. I close my eyes, take a deep breath, and practice what I’ve been working on for weeks.

I pretend I’m at home.

In my room.

Alone.

And I start moving, not letting my mind get in to try and stop me. I move, hands gliding all over my body, hips swaying, hair falling back, legs parting, clothes flying. I zone out. I ignore the money being thrown at me. The hollers of pure ecstasy when my shirt is removed. I leave the panties on. Nicolai said it would drive them wild not being able to see it all. He was right. They’re screaming, begging, and groaning as I shimmy across the stage. Finally, when I open my eyes, I’m astounded at the money on the floor.

It’s everywhere.

Lining the stage.

All for me.

Me.

They love me.

When I’m finished with my dances, the lights go dim and Pamela collects then we move backstage. When we’re there, she turns to me, cheeks red from her dance, body slick with sweat. “Oh, my god. I’ve never heard so much noise in my life!”

I blink, panting myself. “That was ... wow.”

“Well, well, well.”

I turn and see Nicolai striding into the dressing room, straight towards me. “I knew they’d love you, I just didn’t know how much. Congrats, Shania, you just made the most in one dance that any dancer has ever made in my club.”

I blink.

Everyone in the room goes silent.

And then the other girls clap.

Nicolai hands me a bunch of money. I don’t know how much is there, hundreds, maybe even thousands. “This is yours. Well done. See you tomorrow night.”

I stare at the money.

And inside, I scream. Pure, happy joy.

Maybe it’s going to be okay after all.