Chapter 4

Dana

Going on a date with Talon was the last thing I wanted to do, but of course the guy called shortly after I got off the phone with Brandon. He didn't even ask, but simply assumed I was willing to go seeing that my brother already made the confirmation with him.

I grumbled all the way to work the next morning. My evenings were my time to soak in a hot tub, drown myself in ice cream and wine and cry until I had no tears left inside of me.

It was becoming a tradition. A very fucked up, nightly tradition.

"Dana. You have a minute?" Dr. Lewis stood beside the ER reception desk. "I apologize about having to miss our meeting yesterday. Something came up with my wife."

"Sure. No problem." I readjusted my backpack on my shoulder and moved up beside him as we walked down the hallway. "I hope your wife is okay."

"She's undergoing cancer treatments." He glanced over at me, the worried expression on his face shooting an arrow through my heart.

"Oh. I'm sorry." I tried to think of something better to say, but nothing came to me. Funny how his pain had the power to make mine seem so small.

"No, we're okay. She's a trooper." He held the door to the elevator open for me. "She'd been fighting it for some time, and things aren't looking nearly as good as I would like for them to, but we're not giving up."

"Good. Is there anything I can do?" I moved into the elevator and crossed my arms over my chest.

"Just give me an update on Kendal. You're seeing him, right?" He slipped his hands in his pockets and gave me a soft smile. He had no clue of the drama we'd been through lately.

"Sort of." I shrugged, not quite ready to lay out my dirty laundry in front of one of the leading physicians in our hospital.

"Well, make sure you tell him that Denise and I are still praying for him, and when he's ready, we'd love to have him over for dinner." He glanced down at his feet. "Sooner than later, hm?"

"Of course." His message was loud and clear. He wasn't saying what he wanted to say, but I'd been around the dying for far too long. His wife didn't have much time left.

"I'd love for you to come too. Bring him with you?"

The elevator opened and I nodded before walking out. The chances of Kendal and I ending up at a dinner with Dr. Lewis and his wife were slim. He would move on, and I would transfer to New York to see about getting a residency in St. Mark's Hospital. I could be closer to Olivia and get away from the possibility of watching Kendal get back with my sister.

That's not going to happen. It can't.

The sickening feeling had only grown as I walked into Dr. Lewis's office and sat down in front of his desk. "I hope this isn't about me missing three days last week. We had a family emergency, and I filled out all of the necessary paperwork to make sure I wasn't counted for those days."

He smiled and sat down at his desk. "Nothing of the sort."

"Good." I tried to relax, but found myself sitting stiffly in front of him.

"I told you the other day that I was impressed with you jumping into action. You have great ratings on your internship as well." He paused and I tried to think of something to say, but couldn't. I sat there looking stupid, no doubt. "You're looking at a nursing program from what I could see in your records, but I think you have the gifts and talents necessary to be a pretty powerful physician. It's more schooling, but in ten, twenty years, you can use that and your business degree to run a hospital. I think that's something you should consider. I haven't seen someone with as much heart and head in my hospital since I started."

Tears burned my eyes. I was too sensitive for a conversation about my greatness. Partially because I didn't believe there was any.

"I'm sorry." I reached for a Kleenex and pressed it to my eyes. "Thank you for your kindness."

"No kindness here, Dana. I'm being honest. You should consider moving your masters from nursing and into medicine and taking up residence here, or I have some friends at St. Mark's that would love to have you. My stepbrother works up there and he's always looking for help. You could work in the nursing program until you get through your masters, and then we'll place you, or they will for residency. I talked with Aiden this morning."

"It's a lot to think about." I swallowed and moved back in my chair.

"It is. You're right. You and Kendal discuss it. I know he loves his position at UT, but NYU is right down the road from St. Mark's. They're a great school too." He brushed his fingers over his mouth as I continued to wipe at my eyes.

I didn't have the heart to tell him Kendal and I weren't together. Hell, I didn't have the heart to accept it.

"Thank you, Dr. Lewis."

"Nate when it's just us." He smiled warmly. "Would you be willing to chat with Dr. Aiden Crawford from St. Mark's? He's my stepbrother and is a brilliant brain surgeon."

I nodded. Anything that might mean I could run from my current situation, and I was in. Kendal wasn't going to be part of my future, but that honestly meant that Dallas wasn't either. I needed a clean break. A new start.

The universe was shifting and providence was throwing me a ray of sunlight. I couldn't have Kendal, but maybe I would have this.

"There are plenty of great scholarships. We can have Dani, my secretary, look up for NYU or UT for you. Just let me know which way you're headed and know that I'm here to help." He leaned back and clasped his hands over his chest.

"Thank you," I whispered and blotted at my eyes. "Forgive me for-"

"No need. Thanks for meeting with me today." I stood up and walked to the door, pausing only as he called out. "And Dana?"

"Yes, Sir?" I glanced over my shoulder.

"Make sure you take care of Kendal. He's a good man. His mother meant the world to my family. He deserves happiness."

"Yeah. He does." I closed the door behind me and resigned myself to depression for the rest of the day. Kendal did deserve every good thing that life could offer, but who the hell was I to think I could provide it?

I needed to talk to my sister, though it would kill me to do it. I needed to tell her to get back with him, to give him a future that would blow his mind.

She could do that. She was Ana.