Chapter 5

Kendal

"Why is this fucking me up so much? My stomach is a wreck and I can't get my heart to stop racing." I paced the floor in my office late Friday afternoon. I had a few minutes before I needed to head over to help set up for the Beta Alpha Psi Fall Festival.

College kids just used Halloween as an excuse to dress like hookers, naughty nurses and vampires. And I remember loving it when I was younger. My cock twitched at the idea of seeing Dana in any of those costumes. Hell, a t-shirt and jeans would have me crippled if I wasn't careful.

"Because you're in love, man. Go with it." Damon cleared his throat. "What are you dressing up as?"

"Nothing." I snorted and pressed the phone tightly to my ear. "I'm there as the Chaperon. I'm not dressing up. I'd look like an idiot."

"Go as something, dude. Bethany is going to kill you if you come in slacks and a button down."

"Why aren't you coming? Bethany is a post-grad student. She should be chaperoning with me and Dana."

"She's trying to help get everyone in the party spirit." He chuckled. "I'm not going because like you, I'd get hit on ten million times and most likely not end up getting my girl naked. She's a little protective of me."

"You're so full of yourself. You'd think that shit would die down a little with age." I closed my door and walked back to my desk. Dana had responded 'yes' to my invitation to help me chaperon the event. I was beyond thrilled at the thought of getting to see her, and terrified of what might happen all at the same time.

I'd never been the type of man that was unsure of himself. As much pain and loss as I'd suffered, I'd always persevered. Never had I been left standing on wobbly knees and an unsure path.

But I was now.

She meant too much to me. Losing her left me not wanting to try again.

"Dude. You there?" Damon's voice was loud.

"Yeah. Damn." I pulled the phone away from my ear. "I'm not dressing up."

"Go as a professor. A naughty-"

"Alright. I gotta go. The building is on fire or some shit like that." I rolled my eyes. "You're no fucking help at all. I lied to Bethany to get her to the restaurant you wanted me to. I helped you out, remember?"

"Want me to go visit Dana? I already offered that, and I offered you a way out."

"I don't want a way out. I love her, Damon." I sat down on the edge of my desk and tried to calm myself, but it just wasn't going to happen.

"No, you idiot. A way out of the situation by coming to work for me. The offer still stands."

I glanced around my office, half-expecting to feel the same feeling I always got when I walked into any part of the University. Pride. Belonging.

I felt nothing but sadness. Maybe I hadn't ever belonged here.

"I'll think about it. Wish me luck on tonight."

"Nothing to wish luck for. Be honest with her and she's going to melt, Kendal. I've seen her with you. She's already yours. I promise."

"Right." I ran my fingers through my hair and stood. "I gotta run. Thanks for nothing."

"Yep. Fuck you too, buddy."

I dropped the call, grabbed my bag and jacket and pulled the door open to find Eliza standing in the hallway as if she were just about to knock. "Hey."

"Kendal." She put her hand to her chest and let out a soft laugh. "You scared me."

"Sorry about that." I moved into the hallway and closed the door behind me. "I'm walking over to the rec center. You want to walk outside with me?"

"Yes. I was just getting ready to leave, but I wanted to let you know that I finally got a hold of Daisy. She's scared to death, but willing to talk with Lance about her affair with Mark when you're ready for her to." She turned and walked beside me.

Something like ice water rushed through my veins. Nothing would be the same after I exposed Heather's sexual harassment and then pointed the finger at Mark. Someone had to do it, but a small part of me hated that it was me. Mark saved my ass a few times after the situation with the girl who cried rape a few years back. If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have a job.

Not that any of that mattered. Daisy had been taken advantage of, and when Mark was done fucking her, he threw her away and ruined her career. Someone had to do something.

"Good. I'll let you know when that day is. I'm not sure just yet."

"But you're going to talk to him, right?" She tucked her arm into mine as we walked down the stairs slowly.

"Yeah. Absolutely." I opened the door to exit the building as she released her hold on me. "I'm going to a hoppin' party tonight and could use a date..."

"Not in a million years." She laughed and swatted at me playfully. "Have fun and keep your glasses in your bag. You have enough trouble in your life."

"This is true. Night, Eliza." I waved and turned to walk toward the rec center as my phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out to see that Damon was calling... again. "What?"

"Love you too." He chuckled.

"Sorry. What's up, man? I'm a ball of nerves. I told you that."

"Yeah, that's why I was calling. I meant to remind you that you're one bad-ass mother fucker before we got off the phone. You and I ran that campus in our younger years and you could have any woman you wanted, Kendal. You could have Ana back."

"I don't want Ana or anyone else. I want Dana." I jogged toward the large gym in front of me as the sky darkened a little.

"Exactly. Stop letting the past fuck with your future. You're in charge here. Get the girl back using all your moves from when we were kids."

"That shit works on girls, Damon. Not women."

He laughed loudly. "Give. Me. A. Break."

"You're corrupt. I'm telling Bethany to run as fast and far away from you as she can."

"Good luck, chump. She's mine and she knows it."

I walked into the gym and glanced around to find Bethany and Jake working on some of the decorations with a few other students. She turned and waved.

I motioned for her to come over. "I'm going to test this out. She's headed my way."

"Ask her who owns her heart." He chuckled darkly.

"Bethany, who's your daddy?" I asked and winked at her as I pointed to the phone.

"Um... you?" She gave me a questioning look as if she didn't know that I was on the phone with Damon.

"What?" His voice exploded in my ear. "Put her on the phone."

"No! Not me." I handed her the phone. "I was on the phone with Damon. We were talking about... fuck it. Never mind. You talk to him."

She rolled her eyes, took the phone and walked toward the door. The conversation behind me where she was trying to convince him that she thought it was Dana on the phone and we were making her jealous was almost comical. She was in trouble. About as badly as I was.

"Well. Thanks a lot." She handed me the phone back and growled. "He's in alpha ass mode now."

"Nothing new." I put the phone in my pocket. "Are you guys dressing up for this tonight?"

"Yes, and you are too." Dani Bruce moved in front of me, her voice soft and teasing, her eyes filled with the promise of a long night of spreading her legs for the right man.

"I didn't bring anything, but good try." I smiled and turned back toward Bethany and Jake. "I was talking to you two."

"Yeah. We're dressing up. I'm a pirate and Beth is Little Red Riding Hood." Jake grinned like a Tom-Cat.

"And I'm a naughty nurse, Dr. Tarrington." Dani moved back in front of me.

"Just make sure it's campus approved. We have a dress code. I'll be right back." I dialed Dana's number and walked to the far end of the gym. There was no way I was dressing up unless she was. I half expected her not to answer, but when she did, it took me a few minutes to gather my thoughts and process a word.

"Hello? Hello? Kendal?"

"Yeah. Sorry. It's busy in the gym."

"I bet. Did you need something?"

My body hardened all over at the sound of her voice, at the way she almost whispered my name like it still meant something to her.

"This thing is a Halloween type party. Bethany and Jake are dressing up, but I wanted you to know that you don't have to."

"I'm coming as a nurse." She chuckled.

"It's so good to hear your voice." I closed my eyes and took a shallow breath.

"Yeah. I'll be there soon to help. Do you need me to pick anything up?"

"No. I guess I'll just make myself look a little nerdy and come as an accounting professor."

"Sounds good."

The awkward silence didn't belong between us. "Okay. See you soon."

I put the phone back in my pocket and turned to find Bethany watching me. She lifted her eyebrow as if to ask what was up.

"Nothing. Just telling Dana she didn't have to dress up for this." I walked back toward the pile of decorations and students. "I guess I need to grab my calculator and pocket protector from the office to make sure I fit the part."

"Of a nerdy accounting professor?" Jake glanced up from untying a long string of black bats. He was back in his wheel chair due to nerve damage from being attacked by one of his and Bethany's friends. It was a shame for him to be confined to a wheelchair, but there was hope he would eventually get out of it.

"I'll go back over to your office with you. Let's get your stuff and then we can finish getting the decorations up." Bethany nodded toward the door, turning to walk beside me as we made our getaway. "Who's the girl with the bedroom eyes?"

"President of the club. She's the main reason I'd rather not be an adviser, but the Dean wants a male and female on the team. It's our top students..." I paused, a little confused. "How do you not know Dani?"

"She must be new." She shrugged and pushed the door open. "Damon told me that Dana was coming tonight. Are you okay?"

"I've been better." I ran my fingers through my hair and walked beside her back across campus. Dumb-ass waste of time.

"Well, just be yourself, Kendal. You know that she loves you."

"Do I? She hasn't picked up any of my calls over the last three weeks. I'd have broken a leg trying to get to the phone if she had called me." A bit of resentment rushed through me, but I rejected it. It wasn't fair to assume anything.

"You were in love with her older sister. You slept with her. You almost lost your career, your livelihood over her." Bethany gave me a sideways look. "There's no way I could date Damon if he'd slept with my sister. That's... gross."

"It was six years ago, and I didn't know it was her sister." I let out a long sigh. "I can't let that be the thing that stands between us. That's stupid. It was the past. It means nothing to me now. Ana means nothing to me now."

"Does Dana know that?"

"I don't know. I need to see where she's at emotionally before I start trying to fix everything and explain myself." I reached out and opened the door to the accounting building, letting Bethany walk through first. "I'm hoping that we can just have fun tonight and get back to being friends."

"And what about your romantic relationship? There's a lot of tension when you try and turn a sexual relationship into a friendship. Believe me. I know."

I chuckled. "I'm not having this conversation with you. Damon already thinks I'm your daddy, which is going to get us both killed."

"Or mauled at the very least." She laughed. "Why can't you guys just sneak around like Damon suggested?"

"I don't know. We were..." I brushed my fingers by my lips as images of her danced around in my vision. What I wouldn't give to throw her over my shoulder and take her home with me. I needed her to know how I felt about her, how I would give anything up for her. Well, almost anything.

"So do it again. Tease her. Entrance her. Do all the things you and Damon know how to do so well. Win her back."

"And then sneak around until May? That's so much harder than anyone seems to understand."

"But it's worth the effort, right?"

I didn't hesitate at all. I didn't have to. "Absolutely. She's worth it and so much more."

"Good. Then stop being timid and get her back. You're Dr. Kendal Tarrington. Nerdy accounting professor extraordinaire."

I smiled and almost felt sorry for her. I was a professor of accounting, but like my best friend, an alpha male lived deep inside of me, and he wasn't at all happy about losing his woman.

Time to let him out to play.