The walk up to Tommy's apartment is difficult. Every step toward him brings me closer to knowing whether or not he'll want me and this baby. My hand settles on my tummy as I get to the first landing and continue walking up the stairs. The outcome is most likely going to kill a piece of my soul. He can't be with me, and a man like him doesn't want to settle down with a baby. But it's the right thing to tell him. So I have to do this.

With my resolve firm, I brace myself to walk up to his door, but when I look up, my heart freezes in my chest. Vincent Valetti stares back at me with a look of contempt.

I push down all the emotions I'm feeling and school my face. My heart pounds in my chest with fear. I can't die now. Now when I have this life to protect.

“Officer Kelly.” Vince speaks with a hard voice and an even harder expression.

“Miss Kelly, now,” I respond without backing down from his stare. He may be the Don, and he can definitely hurt me, but I know better than to show weakness to men like him.

“Oh, I see. Did you think that'd make it alright for you to cuddle up to my men?” he asks.

The way he says it makes me want to knee this prick in his groin. I may not be in a committed relationship, but I'm not a whore. And what he's implying pisses me off.

“No, I didn't. And if my slut memory is correct, I've only been fucking Tommy, so you can shove that bullshit right back up your ass.”

He narrows his eyes and grinds his teeth. He's looking at me like he's not sure what to do with me. After a long moment of neither of us backing down he says, “I didn't mean to offend you.”

“Yes you did,” I'm quick to answer.

He grins at me with a twinkle of delight in his eyes and agrees, ”You're right. But I'm generally not fond of cops. Please accept my apology.”

My eyes finally break away from his and I feel like I can breathe. I nod and swallow thickly, looking at Tommy's door.

“You're here to see Tommy, then? You quit to be with him?” he asks.

I shake my head. “No, I quit because I never should have been a cop.”

“You don't think you have what it takes?” he assumes.

“No, I think I'd be a great cop if I had the determination for it. If I had the heart for it. But I don't. I joined for the wrong reason.”

“What reason is that?” He tilts his head as if he's sizing me up. He's going to judge me, just like everyone else. I don't give a fuck, though. They can all judge me if they like, but I'm not going to change for them.

“Because my sister was taken by Petrov. I wanted to find him; I wanted to kill him.”

“So you wanted to know about Petrov?” he asks, and I know exactly what he's thinking. He thinks I was trying to get information out of Tommy. He thinks that's why I was with him. That may have been the reason in the beginning, but that's not why I slept with him. And I hate that Vincent thinks that.

“Yeah,” I answer him, not willing to elaborate.

“And now you've quit?”

“Yes.” He looks at Tommy's door with a pissed-off look. He thinks Tommy told me. I can't let him think that. I don't want Tommy to get shit for it, and I won't have to lie anyway.

“He never told me. Even after we were together and everything happened between us. He never told me, but I think he's dead.” Between us. My walls go down and I have to work real fucking hard not to break down. Maybe it was one-sided, and I just imagined him feeling anything toward me.

“So you think he's dead, so you quit.” Although it's not a question, I know he's asking.

“No. I've had a hunch he's been dead for awhile now. I quit because I realized revenge wasn't the answer. There's always going to be someone to fight. I'm not the person to do it. I need to find another way.”

“Another way to do what?” he asks.

“To let go.” Tears prick at my eyes and I feel so fucking weak. I try to keep my composure and walk closer to Tommy's door. “I just need to tell him something.”

“What do you have to tell him? I'd be happy to relay the message.” He takes a step closer to me, and I instantly take a step back. I don't feel the same sense of security with him as I do with Tommy. I don't think I've ever felt that way about anyone before.

“Tell me,” he says, but I can't.

“I--I can’t.” I’ve never spoken to Vincent Valetti before today. And I have no idea what kind of man he is, or what all he knows about us.

“Is it about police matters, or personal?” he asks.

I stare at the door, not knowing how to answer that. I don't want Tommy to get hurt.

“That’s what I thought. You know that’s not smart, right? A cop, and a man like Tommy?” He shakes his head before continuing. “It's over now, isn't it?”

“I came to tell him something before I leave.” A part of me just wants to tell Vincent so I can leave and avoid the rejection I feel coming.

“Good. It’s a good thing you’re leaving. It’s for the best.”

I look back at him, not sure how to respond. It fucking hurts. All of this is really none of his goddamn business.

He presses his lips into a straight line and then he asks, “You tell anyone about this little arrangement you had with Tommy?”

“No. It’s over, so it doesn’t matter.” The words come out hard, but I stand my ground and maintain eye contact.

Vince rocks on his heels and looks to the left. “Good. So what do you have to tell him?”

“Something that’s none of your concern.” He narrows his eyes, but I don’t care.

“Tommy’s in a bit of hot water right now, sweetie, so you might want to be a little bit more forthcoming.” The way he says it makes my heart stop. I don't want Tommy to get hurt because of me. My mother's words ring in my head, it's all because of you.

“I’m pregnant.” The words fall from my mouth, and his eyes widen in surprise as he looks at my stomach. I feel the need to explain, so I blurt out, “It’s early. I can’t be any more than a few weeks along.”

“So it’s been going on for a few weeks, huh?” he asks.

“About that, yeah.” I answer him and he nods his head. His eyes stay pinned on me, like he can read my thoughts. He’s judging me. And along with me, Tommy.

“Are you sure it’s his?” he asks me with an odd expression.

“I don’t fuck around.” I bite out the words with a little anger and instantly regret it. He hardens his expression and stares back at me. “Yes,” I say.

“Why?” he asks me, without any indication of what he’s referring to.

“Why what?” I look at him with confusion. Surely he isn’t expecting me to tell him why women get pregnant. In my case it’s because I’m a fucking idiot who got lost in a man’s touch and wasn’t thinking straight.

“Why’d you go after him?” he asks me.

“I didn’t. It just happened. We didn’t mean for this to happen.” It strikes me that Tommy may be in deep shit. Really deep shit. “He tried to end it, more than once.” I breathe in deep, remembering how he left me, how he never showed and sent me a text. Each time he tried to break things off I knew it was for the best, but it still hurt.

His brows raise in humor. “So he was that good, huh?” He huffs a small laugh and I give him a sad smile in return. That’s all I can offer.

Vince puts a hand on my back and hesitantly gives me a pat as he says, “It’ll be alright. I’ll have him call you.” His comfort is awkward, like he doesn’t want me to cry, but he doesn’t know what to do to make me stop.

“He’s gonna be okay, right?” I ask him, before turning to walk away.

His eyes narrow, and I shake my head and wish I hadn’t said anything. “I shouldn’t ask questions. I take it back.” He looks at me for a long time and I just want to hide.

“My wife didn’t learn as fast as you. She’s got a real problem with being nosy.”

I look at him with a bit of worry.

“You know she tried to kill me once?” My mouth falls open in a little shock and I’m not sure what to say. “It was a horrible effort, really. But I’m just saying, shit can start out rough and end up alright.”

I stare back at him, speechless.

He smiles at me as he says, “Everything’s gonna be alright. I trust you’ll see that soon.”