“You gotta meet the familia.” Tommy wants to take me to his aunt’s house for dinner. To Dante Valetti’s house. Dante Valetti is the former Don and father of the current Don, Vincent Valetti. I’m nervous as hell. It’s been two weeks of just us. Two weeks of hiding away in his apartment while we figure this shit out. There’s no doubt in my mind that I made the right decision leaving the department and doing what feels right. But then I remember his family, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried.

“They know I was a cop.” That's the only explanation I need. That right there is enough for them to want me dead.

“Yeah, they do. And they know you’re my girl.” Tommy rubs his hand over my belly and forces a smile from me. “You’re a woman, Tonya, and I know you hate this, but we keep women out of it.”

“But I was a cop.” I’ve seen them all a handful of times now, and each time it gets easier. But this is different. It’s not one or two of them coming over to drop something off, it’s all of them in one place. And I feel like I’m going to be an outsider.

“Yeah, for under a year. And they know about your sister and why you joined. They know you’re loyal to me.” He stands behind me and wraps his arms around my body, pulling me into his hard chest. I feel cocooned in his warmth. I close my eyes and breathe in deep. It’s not fair that he can put me at ease so effortlessly.

“Besides, there’s someone there I really think you should meet.”

“Who’s that?” I ask.

“You should meet Ava. I think you’d really love getting to know her. She lost her sister, too.”

“Ava?” The name rings a bell, but I’m not sure why.

“Yeah, she’s been asking about you. She wants to meet you.” He speaks his words softly, like he's waiting for something.

“Why does that name sound familiar?”

“Ivanov.” He says her last name and everything clicks into place. I turn in his arms to face him with wide eyes. She’s supposedly dead.

I part my lips, but I don’t ask. I know not to ask questions.

He gives me a small smile and says softly, “A bad man hurt her once, but she made him pay. She's a strong woman, like you. I think you two are going to get along great.”

Tears prick at my eyes, and I hold onto him with everything in me. He kisses my hair, while I try to calm down.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, but he’s long gone, Tonya. He’ll never hurt anyone else.”

I cry in his arms. I haven't cried in weeks, but the need to purge all my sadness has me leaning against him in tears. He rubs my back while I cry for all of them. For my sister, for Ava’s sister. For Ava and the other survivors. I cry for them all. A calmness washes through me as I settle with exhaustion into his embrace. A feeling like a rebirth. Like I’ll finally have a fresh start. Maybe now I can finally get the catharsis I've been striving for all this time.

My blurry eyes catch a glimpse of the picture frame I put on Tommy’s nightstand. It’s the same picture that’s in my locket. My hand reaches up and I grab onto it. We were just young girls in middle school and high school, but it’s my favorite picture of us. I can’t wait until we move and make a new place of our own. We need a fresh start. And moving is the way to make that happen.

I look up at Tommy with wonder, but also a sense of insecurity. I haven’t forgotten what Jerry said, and if I’m honest with myself, I’m worried about Tommy and about him staying in the familia.

“Spit it out, baby.” His hand settles on the nape of my neck, and his thumb brushes along my jaw. It soothes me. Everything about him soothes me.

“I don’t know if I can live with you doing this, Tommy. I don’t--” I just want to list all the reasons this is so wrong. But his lips silence mine in a sweet kiss.

I moan into his mouth, just loving his touch. He pulls back, and looks at me with sincerity.

“I told you, I'm not working for the familia anymore.” I know what he said, but he's too fucking happy for that to really be the case.

“Forget about right and wrong for just a moment. Just listen to your heart, baby. What does it want? Us being together may be fucked up and wrong. But it’s what I want.”

I struggle to respond. He’s right. I do want him. He’s the only thing I want.

“Just give me a chance to love you.” His hand brushes along my belly, where our baby's growing.

It may be wrong, but I want him. I love him.

He must see that I’ve decided. He smirks and says in a playful tone, “You know you’re my bad girl.”

I shake my head and let a small laugh escape me. Tommy takes my chin in his hand and kisses me. My lips mold to his and I give in.

I love him, and that’s all that matters.

“I love you, Tommy,” I whisper as he pulls away from me.

“I love you, too.”