My nerves are shot. My palms are sweaty, and I can hardly breathe. I’m going to meet the familia. The Don is Dante, Vince’s father. I don’t know much about anyone else, though. Well, except that Dom and Tommy were the two that I … met already. I breathe in deep and shake out my hands as we stand in front of the restaurant doors.

“They’re going to love you.” I hear Vince’s voice and my heart hammers in my chest. I just don’t believe it. I swallow thickly. They want me dead I’m sure. It’d be stupid for me to think otherwise. I see my reflection in the mirror and I cringe. I can’t get this stupid panicked look off my face.

I turn to face Vince and try to bail. “I changed my mind.”

“Stop it, Elle.” He opens the door and puts his hand on the small of my back. “Just be yourself.” I take a deep breath and try not to freak out. Everything’s going to be fine. Vince won’t let anyone hurt me. That thought soothes me. Every part of me calms, because it’s true. He won’t let anyone touch me. I’m his.

I look around the table, and the only people I know are the three I met. The two men, Dom and Tommy, I haven’t seen since the incident. It chills me to the core to set eyes on them. But when Dom sees me, he stands and smiles. “Vince, I’m happy you finally brought her out!” Dom walks to me with quick strides and kisses my cheek. Vince loosens his grip on me and leaves my side to give his mother a kiss on the cheek. Without him beside me I feel vulnerable.

The last two weeks have been the same every day. And I’m almost ashamed to say I've enjoyed it. I don’t fear Vince at all. I know he wants me. In his eyes, I belong to him, and he takes care of me in a way I desire. It’s a sick fantasy come to life. Well, some of it. Our days are almost normal until he has to leave for work. Every morning we wake up beside each other, exchange small talk, and drink coffee. We joke around like a normal couple, banter like a normal couple. It’s almost easy to forget that we're anything but normal.

When he leaves is when everything changes. Or at night, before we go to bed. I like to pretend it's a fantasy, a game we like to play. It makes it that much sweeter. I don’t want it to stop. I know that’s bad. I’m sure it’s not healthy. But I fucking love when he ties me up. I know he’s going to reward me and fuck me like he owns my body. Just thinking about it turns me on. But it’s wrong. It’s so wrong.

I haven’t left his house in two full weeks. I’ve barely spoken to anyone but Vince and my mother. Vince wanted me to call her since she filed a missing person’s report. It fucking killed me to think she was worried, but when she answered the phone she seemed more pissed than anything. I almost asked Vince to let me go see her. Almost. But I’d rather stay inside the house with him. It’s all so wrong. But it feels so good. I don’t worry about anything. I enjoy being his. I’m sure a shrink would tell me I’m insane. And maybe I am.

Being here in this restaurant with these people emphasizes how fucked up this situation is. He’s told me about each of them. His brother Dom, and Dom's wife Becca are on the right side of the table. I know Dom’s a professor and that Becca owns this restaurant. His father is seated at the head of the table on the far end, and Vince's mother is seated next to Becca. His cousin Joey’s here. I know he has a son, but I don’t see him here. An older man is sitting next to him, that must be Uncle Enzo. And then there’s Tommy and Anthony, Vince's cousins, sitting together on the left side of the table. Looking at the two of them reminds me of my memory. Of them looking at me like I’m a threat. I still don’t know what I did or what I saw. I just remember Vince pinning me down and them staring at me like I had to die. My palms grow sweaty and I wipe them on the sides of my dress.

“You want a drink, Elle?” Tommy asks me from across the room. He gives me a smile as he takes a sip of his wine.

“Please,” I respond as normally as I can, given the situation and my nerves, and take a step closer to the table.

“Everyone, this is my girl Elle. Ma, no questions. Don’t scare her off.” Everyone laughs at Vince and I pretend to laugh also. But fuck me, my nerves are shot.

“I’m so happy to meet you dear,” Vince’s mother, Linda, says. “Dante has filled me in on how you two met.” I struggle to keep the smile plastered on my face. I’m certain there’s a hint of truth in whatever he’s told her.

“I’m a lucky girl,” I say back as sweetly as possible. I may be scared and intimidated, but I want them to like me. Is that so wrong? If they like me, then maybe Vince will trust me more. Maybe he won’t tie me up every single time he leaves the house. I wonder if I would leave though, if given the choice. Should I leave him? I’m not sure I would. Maybe I really am fucked up in the head.

“There’s no doubt in my mind that he’s the lucky one,” Dom says to my left as Vince pulls out a chair for me. I smooth out my dress and take a seat.

“So, what do you do, Elle?” Becca asks. The swell of her pregnant belly touches the table even though she’s leaning all the way back in her chair. I sure as fuck can’t answer that question. What do I do? I do your brother-in-law. That’s not an appropriate answer. Let's see, so far I’ve quit school, which essentially ended the career I’ve been busting my ass for years at. I don’t have a job, and I’m not sure I’m going to get one. I’ve been painting which I love, and Vince thinks I should sell online. But I’m nowhere near confident in my work to even think about showing it to anyone. Not yet. Maybe someday.

I decide to circumvent the question and change the subject. “Oh my goodness! You look beautiful. Congratulations, you two.” It’s easy to compliment her. She really is radiant with her swollen tummy. “When are you due?” I ask to continue pushing the conversation along.

“Two months.” Dom answers for Becca as he rubs her stomach. The look in his eyes is one of pure devotion. I find myself reaching for Vince’s hand. I wonder if he’ll look at me that way when I’m pregnant with his child. If. If I ever get pregnant with his child. Again, if I could run, maybe I would. I know I’m not pregnant now though. I just got my period before we came out for dinner. For some reason that hurts. Maybe I could justify staying with him if I was carrying his child, but I’m not.

“We’re all so excited for another baby in the family,” Linda says with a smile on her face. “Three grandbabies. I’d love a dozen of them!” Dante rolls his eyes, and Dom snorts.

“You'd better get on Clara and this one then,” Becca points at me, “because after our little girl, I’m getting Dom fixed.” The table roars with laughter, but my face heats with embarrassment and my fingers nervously tighten on Vince’s hand. It’s all too real.

“Damn, Becca, give them the chance to get to know one another before Vince has to knock her up,” Anthony says, and grins at the two of us. I’m trying to relax, but just being around them has my fight or flight instincts on high alert.

Vince wraps his arm around my shoulder and kisses my cheek. He whispers in my ear, “Relax, sweetheart.” His words instantly calm me. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I don’t care if it’s sick. I can keep up this fantasy, whether it’s right or wrong.

The conversation continues as two waiters bring large bowls of chicken alfredo and spaghetti with meatballs to the table. Ah. Family style. Becca licks her lips and reaches for the bowls, but can’t quite get to them with her belly. I stifle a small laugh. It’s pretty adorable watching her struggle. Dom smacks her hands away playfully and dishes out a large helping of both entrees onto her plate.

Tommy and Anthony start talking about bets and making wagers with Dom. Dante cracks a joke, and the entire mood seems to lighten and flow naturally. Laughter and chatter fill the air.

I start to relax into my seat, and think I can actually eat without feeling sick to my stomach with worry. When the tension finally leaves my shoulders, and just as I start to think I can do this, I hear a loud bang. And another and another, as glass shatters and people scream. I feel the air whiz by my head. I hear it over and over--a mix of screams and bangs. It’s surreal.

Vince’s hurls his body in front of me and pushes me out of my chair. I land hard on my back with his body caging me in. I look to my left and see Becca screaming and crying. Dom’s holding and protecting her the same way as Vince is holding me. Tommy and Anthony are screaming at one another, but their voices are muffled. Each of them is down on one knee with their guns extended, propped up on the backs of the chairs for extra support. They’re firing. Some of the bangs and bullets are coming from them.

“Get her out of here! Get them out!” I can barely hear Vince screaming as he lifts up my body. The sound of tires screeching echoes in my ears, and strong arms pull me away from Vince. I find myself running, my heart beating out of control as adrenaline races through my veins. My feet trip on a fallen chair and I land hard on the ground.

Dom doesn’t give me a moment to right myself. Instead, he picks me up, tucking my body under his left arm, and carries me as though I weigh nothing.

“Vince!” I scream out as I see him jumping through the shattered large bay window. He doesn’t stop. He doesn’t hear me. He’s gone and I’m being carried away.

* * *

I look around me behind the restaurant. It’s a small alley. There are dumpsters at the end of it and the other side leads to the busy street. Dom is holding Becca, who’s crying hysterically. No one else is here. I’m alone. I hear him shushing her. I hear the ambulance and the sirens from the police cars.

Reality hits me in the face. I can run. I can get the fuck out of here and save myself. I turn to look over my shoulder and Dom is staring me down. His face is all hard edges and his eyes hold an edge of a threat. But I doubt he’d leave his crying, pregnant wife to chase me down. But then again, I wouldn’t get very far. I’m not a fast runner. I settle my back against the brick wall and sink down until my ass hits the pavement.

I feel far too sober. What the fuck am I doing? Who is this woman I’ve become? I wish Vince were here more than anything. I feel like that thought should be alarming to me. That it should send up red flags, but instead it offers me comfort. I’ll feel better once he comes to get me. My gut twists. He better come get me. He better not get hurt. I don’t know what I’d do without him.

The door to the right of me slams open, and Dante comes out. I rise to my feet and look behind him. Vince isn’t there. My heart races faster. What if something happened to him?

“He’ll be alright.” I jump at Dante’s words. He puts a hand on my shoulder, but I move away from him.

“This doesn’t happen,” I hear Becca say as she tries to calm her breathing. Her hand rests against her belly and she looks me in the eyes. “I don’t know how long you’ve been with Vince, but I promise you this is not normal.” She swallows and breathes in. She’s sitting in Dom’s lap and he’s rubbing her shoulders.

This is not normal.

“Let’s get you to the hospital, doll.” He stands and helps lifts her up.

“I’m fine. I’m fine,” she says, pushing him away. Dante walks closer to them, leaving me alone across the opposite side of the door.

“You should go to the hospital just to be sure. Get a look at my granddaughter and make sure everything's okay.” He gives her a reassuring smile and Dom whispers something in her ear.

I can’t handle this. I turn and walk to the door.

“I have to go to the bathroom.” They all turn to me and I wait for a response. No one says anything. Both men look at me like they aren’t sure I’m telling the truth. If I’m honest with myself, I’m not sure that I am.

“Make a right outside of the office,” Becca answers with her eyes closed. I nod my head once, and walk through the door with my eyes on the ground. The commotion in the dining hall makes me walk faster. I get to the bathroom, shutting the door behind me and the noises are muted. It’s quiet. I walk quickly to the faucet and turn it on. I take a moment to splash some cold water on my face, then run my wet hands down the back of my neck.

I breathe in and out. What am I doing? What am I going to do? I swallow thickly. I don’t know the answer to either question.

“Miss Hawthorne? Elle Hawthorne?” Hearing my name startles me and I turn around to face two women, each holding a badge out for me to see. It takes me a minute to realize what’s going on. Two cops. Blood drains from my face and my hands go numb. Fuck. Fuck, this cannot be good.

“Yes?” I ask weakly.

“You’re coming with us.”