Jake

I crawl over her body, careful not to move too fast. Air mattresses fucking suck when you are trying to be gentle. The fact that with every movement Blair is shifting from side to side would have made me laugh had she been wearing anything more than a tight tank top and barely-there panties.

My head is fucking spinning.

I look up toward the Pack ’n Play where Isabelle is sleeping soundly just as I lower myself over Blair.

“She’ll sleep through just about anything.”

Good because the last thing I want is for anything to interrupt what is about to take place.

“I’ve missed you so much,” I whisper in the darkness, kissing along her jaw. Her neck arches back, opening herself to me, and her body presses upward into mine. “Missed touching you and holding you.” My hands tremble with the strong need to break through this reserve I’m desperately trying to hang onto. I feel like at any minute the crazy needy fucker inside me is going to break free and this time between us is going to be over too fast.

“Missed you too.”

I pause, looking down at her as her eyes meet mine. Her legs part, fitting perfectly to the outside of my hips as I settle in to the space between. When she hooks her legs together behind my lower back I can’t stop myself from shifting forward. I am so hard it hurts, but that has always been the issue with Blair. My body always reacts to her, whether she is as she is now, or fully clothed. There is this deep pull I feel toward her, this connection I can’t fight.

She toys with the hair at the back of my neck with her fingers and uses her grasp to pull me closer.

“Kiss me,” she demands, and I give her what she wants. A slow kiss at first, but she quickly takes more, gliding her tongue over my lower lip. Together we rock our hips while we express with our mouth the same motion, like a prequel of what’s to come.

Her nipples bead beneath the thin material of her shirt and as she rocks against me they continue to tease. I want to taste them, toy with them, sliding my tongue over the hard pebble. Taking my time, I skim over her side with the tips of my finger as I continue to kiss her. Slipping beneath the hem of her shirt, I slowly start to lift until the palm of my hand is laying flat over her. Her elated breaths give me the confirmation I need to continue. She wants this as desperately as I do.

There are still times when this feels like a dream, her and me, here together. I’d reached the point where I thought I’d never get the chance to touch her again, but now here we are. I feel like the luckiest man alive.

Careful to remain calmer than I feel inside, I start sliding my hand upward until I cup her breast. I use my thumb to toy with the hardened peak. She gasps into our kiss when I pinch softly and tweak gently.

“Yes,” she whispers into our kiss before diving in once more, harder this time and more desperate. “Don’t stop.” I had to smile because I was just thinking the same thing in my mind. There was no way I could stop.

Kissing down the side of her neck and along her now exposed chest, I find her nipple and bite delicately. She doesn’t wait before she too begins to explore. She dives her hand beneath the band of my boxers, takes me into her hand, and fists me firmly. Careful to go slow, she begins to slide up and down over me and a moan falls from my lips which seems to please her.

“Slow,” I tell her, and immediately she begins to shake her head. The movements of her fist grower faster and tighter. Jesus, she is trying to torture me.

I notice with her other hand she is tugging at the side of her panties and I lift my hips just enough to look down between us.

“I need more.” She is hurrying to get them out of the way and I’m hypnotized by her movements and desperation for me.

Suddenly, there she lies beneath me, bare and waiting, still gripping my cock tight.

Reaching above her head I grab the condom I placed there and hold it to my mouth. Carefully I tear open the package and with skill I didn’t know I still possessed I sheath myself. My boxers remain halfway down my thighs and had I been attempting to be suave I would have moved them. Only at this point there is a desperation between us that neither of us had any hope of containing. We need the connection, it is a have to have, a must.

Feeling her against me so warm and ready drives me wild. With each shift of her hips she manages to glide over my shaft and my legs shake as adrenaline courses through me.

“I need you.” Blair looks up at me and places her hands against my chest. “Make everything else disappear.”

I understand what she means; there are so many things that still flow between us and this is our time to erase them. Our chance to reconnect and remember who we are.

Us.

I pull my hips back, lining myself up and gently shift forward as I enter her slowly. Together we moan, feeling the way her body hugs me so tight.

Our movements quicken with each stroke, her head thrown back, her tits thrust upward against my own chest. The sweet satisfied look on her face is enough to make me lose my mind.

Her hips quickly shift beneath me as if she is chasing something, in desperate need of it. She grips my shoulders with her hands, her nails biting into my flesh, and still all I can see is her. I’m so lost in her.

“Perfect.”

I notice instantly the way she closes her eyes tightly and turns her head from me. There is still a resistance between us that I hate, but understand. She wants to trust me completely, I just have to ensure she has no reason not too.

“I love you, Blair,” I whisper against her temple as I continue to move inside her. “I’m so in love with you.”

The tremble of her lower lip makes my chest feel as though it is being squeezed unbelievably tight.

I’ll tell her this a million times until she feels the depth of my feelings for her. I don’t take offense that she has yet to say it in return. We’ll get there, I know we will. We have already come so far. I also know that she loves me; I can see that love in her eyes when she looks at me. She tries to hide it, tries to remain strong, but it’s there.

Blair is my solace, she is my version of heaven. I’ll wait for her, no matter how long it takes. Because she is worth it. My little girl, my little family, it is all worth it.

I sit in my patrol car along the side of Mason’s gym. I have the perfect view of the intersection. It is also a good place to hide. One by one I watch the cars slow to a stop then drive through once again.

I’ve been on shift over four hours already and from the very second I closed the door to Blair’s apartment after stopping in to see both her and Isabelle, I’ve felt their absence. Still almost a month later I’m amazed by the fact that I’m a father. It still seems unreal. I have a daughter. Then there’s the woman who gave me that gift. I came to this town thinking there was no possible way I could love Blair more than I already did. But the moment I saw her, holding our daughter, I knew I’d been mistaken. I was so wrong.

They’ve both became my world, and the reason for my existence. Adore, cherish, those words don’t even compare to what I feel for the two of them.

The sound of a horn blaring pulls me from my day dream of my girls just in time to look up and see a crash take place in the center of the intersection before me. With a flip of the lights I lift my radio and call in the accident. Easing forward, I block the oncoming lane of traffic with my car and place it in park.

By then the passengers of those cars around have gotten out and are moving around franticly. “That truck didn’t even stop.” One lady begins to run in my direction, her arms flailing around as she points to the silver car only a few feet away. “He ran right through it and hit that poor girl in the side.”

“I’ll need you to fill out a statement, ma’am, but for now I need you to remain calm. Go wait by your vehicle, please.”

I leave the woman standing alone as I walk toward the two vehicles involved in the accident. Assessing the situation, I find the man in the truck holding his shoulder and whining in pain.

“Sir…” He looks over at me and instantly I smell the alcohol on his breath. The man is so intoxicated I think he is sweating booze. “I need you to remain in your vehicle.” He nods though it is more of a roll as his head bobs to the side.

Quickly I move toward the silver SUV that has been shoved across the intersection and into a pole. Looking in through the back window, my heart feels like it literally stops beating. I’ve seen that pink fabric before. The blanket that now lies on the floor is the very blanket I wrapped around Isabelle when I leaned over her crib just this morning to give her a soft kiss goodbye.

A loud cry fills the car as Marcy, who has now begun to stir looks toward the back seat. “Oh my god,” she cries and continues to tug on her seat belt. Her reaction seems to give me the boost I need to move into action.

The sounds of sirens, both police and ambulance, ring throughout the area. A horn sounds just as the people who have gathered part and another patrol car followed by the EMT’s pulls in closer to the accident.

“Marcy, I need you to remain still.” I reach in and hit the unlock button on the inside of her door. Reaching out I place my hand on hers. “We don’t know the extent of your injuries yet, so I need you to stay put.”

“The kids…” She begins to shake, still trying to twist in her seat.

“I know.” I try to assure her everything is okay, but on the inside I feel as though I am dying.

When the EMT steps up to the car, I slowly back away and reach for the handle on the rear door. I let them look at her while I look in on the kids. Matthew’s head is moving around franticly, his eyes wide in fear almost like he is to terrified to cry, speak, or even move.

Next to him, in her own car seat, lies Isabelle. Little specks of blood cover her along the side of her face and onto her arm and leg. The passenger window shattered from the impact to the pole and the shards came in from her side, blowing across both of them. Matthew also had little speckles of red over his cheek.

“It’s okay,” I tell Marcy, though I still don’t know for sure.

“Two kids,” I say to the EMT who is now looking back at me from the front seat. “One boy, three years old, and one girl, just over six months old.” The woman watches me with a confused look on her face. “The little girl is my daughter.”

I’ve only felt this helpless once before in my life. It was a night I know still haunts Blair and brings on an anger inside me that can only be classified as dangerous. Isabelle turns her head from side to side as if suddenly becoming aware of her surroundings, and begins to scream more than the small whimpers that she expressed seconds ago. It isn't her happy squeal, the one I’ve heard often and still makes me smile each time. This one is the kind of scream that cuts right through a father, a dad who wants nothing more than to grab her hand and hold her close, assuring her everything is okay. Fuck I feel like I am dying inside.

“We need to get them out, sir.” I look up again to the EMT as she nods in my direction. I look over my shoulder and see the man standing behind me wearing the same shirt she is.

It is one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do, but I step back and let them do their jobs. First Matthew is removed and passed to the waiting paramedic. By this time Marcy is already strapped to a gurney and on her way to the ambulance. She is still frantic as she tries to turn enough to see the kids.

“I’m with them,” I tell her, hoping she can relax enough to be loaded up and get the help she needs. She is a mess, blood running from the side of her head and unable to move her arm. She needs to go. “I won’t leave them, I promise.”

Though she is reluctant she finally gives in and is loaded into the back of the ambulance.

A familiar cry shatters my heart once more when I see Isabelle being lifted out of her car seat and held against the paramedic’s chest. Without being able to stop myself, I move toward the two kids who are being assessed.

“Jake?” Farris steps up to my side and places his hand on my shoulder.

“Iz.” It’s all I can get out before my throat feels like it is closing so tight it is hard to breathe My head is growing hazy, my gaze locked on her.

She is flailing around, her head twisting in my direction no matter which angle they hold her in. She wants me and damn it, I want her too.

Matthew stands next to the female paramedic, toying with her stethoscope that hangs around her neck. The side of his face shines with antiseptic that has now been placed on the small little cuts on his face.

“Looks like besides a few cuts from the glass that was blown in on them during impact, these two are pretty lucky.”

I hear a loud shuffle, someone hollering incoherently, and I lift my gaze just in time to see an officer placing the driver of the other vehicle in the back of another ambulance. Remaining in control of the rage I feel toward this drunk prick is hard to manage. It is my job to remain calm, but that fucker just blew through a stop sign and hit three people who mean something to me.

“He’ll be checked out at the hospital, then once he’s clear we’ll do our part.” I don’t look away from the man, but nod in understanding of Farris’ words. “The kids will have to go to the hospital too, just to be sure.”

I look back toward Isabelle just as she reaches out for me. I don’t hesitate as I pull her into my chest and kiss her head, breathing in her sweet baby scent. Her soft whimpers, the way she continues to take in one shuddering breath after another, only weaken me further.

Her tears, just as her momma’s, gut me.

“I need to call Blair.” Isabelle lays her head on my shoulder.

“Okay, Daddy.” Farris reaches out to touch Izzy’s cheek. “You go with the kids, I got the car. I’ll follow you over and call Blair and Will.”