Blair

“All this time that Marcy is spending with Isabelle is giving her baby fever.” Will widens his eyes, his brows lifting high into his hairline. “She keeps dropping hints here and there.”

“Oh yeah?” I step away from him as I hit the unlock button on my key fob. “And what do you say?”

“You know me, I just ignore it, or change the subject.” Turning around to face him I reach out and push against his chest. “What? Matthew is a handful. I think he’s put the fear of having any more in me.”

“He is not that bad.” I attempt to keep a straight face, but Will knows me too well. Again that freakish arch of his brow takes over as if to say I ain’t buying your lies. “He’s just a silly boy, and anyway, he gets his crazy from you.”

“You need to spend a day with Marcy and you might not assume he gets it all from me.”

“Please, your wife is so quiet and peaceful.” He lets his head tilt forward as he looks down at the ground.

“She has you all fooled,” he mumbles and again I can’t help but laugh. Being here surrounded by the Flannigans has proven to be the best choice I’ve ever made. Not only for myself, but for Isabelle too.

I notice movement over Will’s left shoulder and look up just in time to see a guy and a girl walk toward the parking lot. There is something familiar about the girl as she races behind the guy. They are hidden in the darkness, as well as by the mass of vehicles parked out here, but for some reason I can’t look away.

“What are you looking at?” Will doesn’t wait for me to answer as he turns around and also watches the couple climb inside a dark car with tinted windows. The loud rumble of an engine fills the silence just before the car backs out of its space and drives in the opposite direction, the wheels squealing just a small fraction upon take-off. “Do you know them?”

I shake my head, finally turning my attention back to Will. “I don’t think so, but something about the girl seems familiar.” I can’t shake the feeling that I’ve seen her somewhere before. Just the way she jogged after the guy, it was almost as though I’d seen that very thing take place once before. A feeling of déjà vu settles heavy in my stomach.

“Well, I guess I better get going.” I step up and offer Will another hug. He has no idea what him showing up at the end of my shift has done for me. He made it possible for me to escape without dealing with Shawn and the awkwardness of denying him yet again for a second date. “Whitney’s going over to stay at her man’s place again and I know she’s waiting on me.”

“She’s getting serious about him, it seems.” Will gives me a gentle squeeze, holding his to-go bag at my side with the opposite hand. “Not sure I like the idea of you and Iz being home alone all the time.” The big brother role kicks in heavily as he watches me when I step back toward my car.

“We’re good,” I assure him though he doesn’t seem convinced.

After he ensures I’m tucked safely in my car, he walks toward his own and I start my five-minute drive toward home. It’s been a long night and it’s always the same. About halfway through, I’d find myself missing Isabelle like crazy.

The same excitement I feel every time I arrive home hits me when I place my car in park and grab my bag off the passenger seat. I hurry toward the front door, and just as I’m about to climb the two steps onto our front porch I hesitate. The same rumble I heard only a short time ago can be heard again. Looking back over my shoulder, I find the same dark car from the restaurant sitting in front of my neighbor’s house, idling along the curb.

What are the chances? Something about it gives me the chills.

The window tint makes it hard to see inside, but it doesn’t stop me from staring.

“You coming inside or…”

I jump in surprise at the sound of Whitney’s voice and spin around, holding my hand to the center of my chest. She pauses mid-sentence, her hand on her hip with her eyebrow cocked in question.

“You scared the hell out of me.” I push past her and she laughs as she stumbles back into our apartment. I decide not to say anything about the car for fear of her thinking I’d lost my damn mind. Instead I focus on my little angel who lies in the center of the floor, kicking her legs enthusiastically.

The moment she sees me she squeals loudly and her arms match the movements of her chubby legs.

“I tried to put her down but she refused to give in.” Whitney sits on the couch and props up her feet. “After about fifteen minutes I caved and we’ve been watching TV since.”

I reach down and pick Isabelle up from the floor.

“Are you giving Aunt Whit trouble?” Her little hand immediately goes for her mouth and slobber runs along her chin.

“You going to Trevor’s?” I ask Whitney.

“In a bit,” she says with a shrug. “His brother’s over there and last time I talked to him they were watching some game or something. If I go over there now, I’ll be forced to engage, and you know me, sports are not my thing.”

“In that case, do you care if I grab a quick shower before you take off?”

Instead of a vocal response, she holds out her hands and wiggles her fingers in a give me motion. I pass Isabelle to her and walk toward my room with a smile as I look back over my shoulder. There they sit, Iz securely tucked into the crook of Whitney’s arm as they both stare ahead. It reminds me yet again how lucky I am to have them both.

Gathering my clothes I rush toward the bathroom, pausing near the window to peek outside. I am relieved to find the black car is no longer sitting along the curb. I don’t know why, but something about it leaves an empty ache inside my stomach.

With my purse and the diaper bag over my shoulder and Isabelle held firmly in my other arm, I walk toward the front door. She is blowing spit bubbles as she wiggles against me, one hand fisting in my hair that hangs loosely over my shoulder. It reminds me of why I’m so quick to pull it back all the time. It’s the first thing she grabs whenever given the chance.

Stepping outside, I pull the door shut behind me and give the handle a twist to ensure I locked it. That very second Isabelle decides to throw out one of her famous glass-breaking squeals and my heart feels as though it jumps out of my chest. I have a feeling once she is able to finally talk I wouldn’t be able to quiet her again, she is always so vocal.

“One of these days, little lady, you are gonna give your mommy a heart attack.”

Mine still beats fast as I walk toward my car and tuck her into her car seat. I ensure she has a rattle in one hand and her pacifier in her mouth before I close the door and climb inside myself. Checking the mirror I verify that I can see her through the reflection of the second mirror fastened to the car seat before her. Iz is so fascinated by her plush toy as she shakes it around that I pause for a few seconds just to watch her before I start backing out of the driveway.

When she starts to fuss, as she always does while being trapped in her car seat, I turn on the nursery rhymes and begin singing along with them to distract her. Had anyone told me last year that I’d be doing this very thing now I would have thought they were crazy. I didn’t think I wanted children. Not after the life I’d had growing up; it was too scary to even consider. I knew the harsh realities of real life, the dark times and the evil. I didn’t want to be responsible for bringing any child into a world like I’d experienced. Yet now I can’t imagine my life without Isabelle. She is the greatest part of my days and nights.

“We’re almost there, Iz.” I shush her as I search for a parking space at the bank. I have a feeling my running around is going to be torturous today with this little lady. She hates being restricted in her car seat.

Mrs. Wilmar is waiting behind the counter with an eager smile as I step inside. “She gets cuter each week, I swear to it.” She leans over the counter with her arms stretched outward. “Let me see that angel while you get your things ready.” It’s the same thing each week. She is well into her fifties and all her own grandchildren live in different states, rarely giving her the chance to see them as often as she’d like. I think Isabelle gives her the fix she needs.

“Those dark locks of hers are starting to curl on the ends.” I watch as she runs her fingers over Isabelle’s hair. “She may not share your hair color, but it looks like she may just end up with the waves like you have, Blair.”

I hope so, because if I hadn’t gone through hours of labor myself I wouldn’t believe she was mine either. Isabelle is her daddy’s, without a doubt. The dark hair, the contour of her jaw, and those eyes—they are all Jake’s.

“Yeah, maybe.” I avert my eyes, filling out the forms quickly. I already know the questions are coming. Betty Wilmar is a sweet lady, but she is also a little nosy.

“Her daddy has the dark hair, right?” I nod because we’ve been down this road almost weekly. “How any man can walk away from a gem as sweet as this little lady is a puzzle to me. He has no idea the joys he’s missing out on.” A hollow feeling fills my stomach as I push the deposit slip and my check across the counter. “Such a shame she doesn’t have a daddy to protect her.”

And there goes that swift kick to the gut feeling.

I reach out and take Isabelle in my arms.

“She has the next best thing in Will and Warren. They are the greatest uncles a girl could ask for.” I don’t look at Betty because I don’t want her to see the tears that our conversation has brought to my eyes.

I really need to change banks, but unfortunately I think it would end up being the same thing, just a different person. It would seem everyone knows everything about all the things that aren’t their business.

“Here you go, sweetheart,” Betty counts out the sixty dollars I’ve requested and then places the receipt for my deposit next to it. “If you ever need a little time to yourself the offer to babysit this sweet angel always stands.”

“Thanks.” I quickly tuck my things into my purse. “But all the time I can get with her I take, because I miss her entirely too much when I’m gone.” I chance a glance at Betty and find her smiling back at me. “You have a good day, Betty.”

“You too, hon.”

I step outside and take in a calming breath. Everything here is great, peaceful and safe. Everything but the fact that everyone seems to think I ran off to the city, got knocked up, and came back home to raise my daughter alone. It isn’t as if those facts aren’t entirely true, but I hate that my life is a topic those around me discuss. I also can’t stand the idea that one day Isabelle may be forced to hear the same things I filter now.

I move my little girl from my side around to my front as I hug her close. “I’ll love you enough that you won’t even have the chance to miss him.” I know that even though I wish for that to be true there will be a day when she’ll need her daddy.

With a deep breath in and a slow release I safely tuck her back into her car seat and drive off toward my next stop. One person after another, I ignore the pitied looks of the elder population around town. I look past those who are younger and assume the worst, and choose to ignore the whispers I occasionally hear around me.

Instead I smile at Iz, tickle her tummy, and kiss her cheeks each time we stop and get out of the car. I remember what I left behind in the city and cherish the fact that here, she is safe.

When I arrive at the grocery store I gather her and walk toward the entrance holding her close to my front. Collecting a cart, I place her in the seat and triple check its straps are secure around her. Even then, after knowing that the buckle locked in place, I still keep my hand on each side of her as I start inside.

I remain focused on her, playing the occasional game of “peek a boo” when she starts to get antsy. I don’t even flinch when she hollers out, because her screeches are a welcome distraction.

I am so focused on her that I don’t even notice we’re no longer alone…until I hear his voice.

“Is she mine?”

I freeze, with my hand on the jug of milk still sitting just inside the cooler.

“And before you decide to lie, let me assure you that just by looking at her I already know the answer to that question.”

The urge to run hits me, as I look from side to side without actually looking behind me.

“Were you ever gonna tell me that I have a daughter?”

Tears cloud my vision as I stare ahead at Isabelle, who’s now focused on the man who I know stands only a few inches behind me. She doesn’t cry, only sucks on her pacifier, making those cute little noises she’s done so many times before. Yet I still can’t bring myself to turn around. I don’t know what to say or how to react. I never thought I’d be faced with this situation.

“I wanna be angry right now over the fact that I had no idea I was a father, only I can’t be. She’s beautiful.”

I close my eyes tightly, willing the tears to just go away. Only one escapes as it slowly rolls over my cheek.

“What’s her name?”

I open my eyes just as he reaches over my shoulder and touches her leg with the tips of his fingers. A gentle touch, as if to ensure she is real and that his eyes aren’t playing tricks on him.

“Isabelle,” I whisper her name, my throat feeling scratchy from the emotions racing through me. “What are you doing here?”

I take the chance to look back over my shoulder and immediately regret it. Jake’s penetrating stare, the same one I’d seen so many times when I closed my eyes at night, bore into me. I feel like the air has been knocked right out of me.

He looks the same, only stronger, if that makes sense. Not only physically, but there is a determination in his eyes, a powerful stance as he stares back at me with purpose.

“I came for you.”