Micah

 

I ran a hand down my face, pulling at my cheeks and dragging out my lower lip. I couldn't remember the last time I'd cried, the last time I'd felt this much anguish and pain. My last living family member was gone, leaving a hole in my guts like I'd never imagined.

 

Jaws had died just a few years ago. But, well, Jaws had been an asshole. He wasn't half the father to me that Grandpa was. I don't even think I cried over Jaws, to be honest. Maybe I did, once, when I was alone. But it was just a few tears shed after a bottle of Jack had worn my defenses down.

 

But now, as I stared down at the demolished face of my grandpa and simply nodded to identify him for the FBI, I realized what Kaci had been feeling for all these weeks.

 

I turned around and walked back outside to rejoin Kaci.

 

“You okay?” Kaci asked as I came up to her. She threw her arms around my neck, hugging her small body against mine. It was a small comfort but, as I wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her closer, it was better than I deserved.

 

After all, I'd just gotten my Grandpa killed. I felt the tears begin to build up behind my eyes, and blinked them away. I couldn't let anyone see me like this, even if it was over Quentin.

 

Business-like flats clicked on the sidewalk behind me. “Whoever killed him left a note,” Agent Brumfield said to my back. “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you're a dead man.”

 

I released Kaci and turned around to face the FBI agent. “Can't you bring this fucker in on killing one of your own?” I asked. “I mean, I've seen guys get brought down for way less than this shit.”

 

“Those guys weren't connected the way Efraim is, Micah,” Avery said, taking a step closer. “This is the biggest of the baddest, right here. We never told you this was going to be easy. Your grandfather knew it, too.”

 

“But,” Kaci started as her hand reached down to find mine, “you've gotta be able to do something, Avery. I mean, shootings in parks, killing retired agents. What's next for this guy?”

 

The agent shook her head, her lips pursed tight, her brow furrowed. “We're working on it. Best we can do right now is put you two in Witpro, like we discussed. Clearly, this guy knows who you are, and he thinks you've got dirt on him.”

 

“Fine,” Kaci said, squeezing my hand tightly. “If we've gotta go into hiding, I'm fine with that. We'll do whatever you need us to do.”

 

“Yeah,” I agreed, squeezing her hand right back as I nodded at the agent. “Whatever you need, Avery.”

 

“About that . . .” Avery began, then trailed off. “My biggest concern right now is that you two are going to stick out if you're together, no matter where we put you. And, believe me, Petrov's got people all over.”

 

She'd said “together” with emphasis. I started shaking my head already, not liking where this was going.

 

“Together?” Kaci asked, practically reading my mind. “What the fuck, Avery?”

 

“If I put you both under, they're going to find you no problem. We can't hide you both, you're too obvious.”

 

“Avery,” I said, “we were supposed to go together. That was the only way we agreed to this.”

 

“Look,” the FBI agent said, her voice harsh as she dropped all the decorum I'd begun to expect, “this guy just sicced a biker gang on you in a public park, then killed your grandfather when they didn't get the job done. Do you really fucking think he's just going to let this blow over, like he'll fucking forget about you or some shit?”

 

“No,” I started, thinking about what I would have done in his shoes. I was going to say something else, but she was already continuing on, cutting me off.

 

“Men like this keep out of prison by tying up loose ends, Micah. And you two are some of the loosest goddamned ends I've ever seen.” Avery pointed back behind her at my grandpa's now empty house. “Now, do you want your girlfriend to end up like Quentin, but at the bottom of a bayou with her head cut off and her hands missing? Or do you want to keep your asses alive by doing what I say?”

 

I took a deep breath and looked down at Kaci for her input. I squeezed her hand and she looked up at me, our eyes locking.

 

I thought I could see the hurt in her eyes, the pain at how fucked up this all was. We were supposed to be doing this so we could be together, away from our dark pasts. But where had that gotten us? Now, we were just running from it, but in different directions from one another.

 

# # #

Kaci

 

This was all just too much. First my mom, then having to run. Follow that with hooking, Romeo dying. Now, after I'd turned away from killing Efraim and run into the arms of Micah, this shit happened.

 

I couldn't do it. I couldn't give him up, too. It was bad enough that I'd practically lost Sydney already, and that we'd have to leave Gov behind when we ran.

 

But, to run separate, that was just the icing on this shit-cake life was feeding me.

 

“Come on,” Micah said, touching my face and squeezing my hand, “we've got to. I need you safe, and they think we'll be better off split up.”

 

“Fuck 'em,” I replied, smiling as I shrugged a little, trying to keep up a brave front.

 

Beneath that facade, though, my insides were crumbling like one of the old mausoleums outside New Orleans. All the death, all the mistakes we'd made. Death, at this point, would be an escape from the constant disappointments of life. I mean, what else did I have if Micah was taken from me, too?

 

“I can't lose you, too,” he whispered. “Not you and Grandpa, both.”

 

God, he really did love me. It took me a moment to let that sink in. He loved me, an ex-whore from bumfuck nowhere. And, now, he was getting taken away by Efraim and the FBI, all because I showed up at the meet when I shouldn't have.

 

Something inside me almost broke at that moment, I think. Some little piece of me that had been strong enough to hold out against the world all by itself. Because I'll be damned if I didn't love him right back, even if I couldn't get my mouth to shape the words.

 

Despite not being able to speak them, I felt them in my chest. A warm, soft glow that seemed to fill me up from the inside. There was a soft, whispering voice in my heart that told me his living was what mattered. That I'd be able to live my life as long as I knew he was out there still stomping the earth.

 

I smiled a little, wiped away a tear that threatened to run down my cheek. “Okay,” I choked out, my voice tight. I nodded again. “Okay, yeah. Let's do it.”

 

He turned back to Agent Brumfield. “Alright,” he said, “we'll split up.”