Chapter Thirty-Nine
Cade
Two Weeks Later
Nerves pounded violently through my chest as I waited impatiently for something to happen. This empty, fairly small room was an innocuous one, but what was about to happen in here could potentially be life changing. If things went to plan. I’d been very confident that they would, up until this moment I was certain that all would be okay, but now... Now I wasn’t so sure.
It wasn’t that I didn’t trust Alissa, I just couldn’t stop being afraid. Horrible images kept flicking through my mind, growing increasingly terrible with each passing second: Alissa, choking again, her clarinet failing, the roof of the building caving in...
I just knew how important this audition was to her, how brave she’d been to get to this point, I didn’t want anything to fail her now. It wasn’t the New York Grand Orchestra, it was a much smaller outfit, but it was just what she wanted to get her started.
“Who are you here with?” an elderly gentleman asked me quietly. We had a shared bond, an anxiety for our loved ones that brought us together.
“Oh, my girlfriend,” I told him with a bright smile, trying to hide all my fears for a moment. “What about you?”
“My daughter, Sadie,” he told me happily. “She’s been looking forward to this for ages.”
“What instrument does she play?”
“Violin; your girl?”
“The clarinet,” I replied proudly. It wasn’t an instrument that I ever envisioned loving, but hearing Alissa make magic with it was the loveliest sound in the world.
As he sat back with a proud look on his face, I considered for a moment what it might be like to be a father myself. It hadn’t been anything I’d considered before, I didn’t much want anything to cramp my style, but now with Alissa, I wanted it all. I wanted the solid family unit that I hadn’t ever had before. I wanted us to be married; I wanted a baby in Alissa’s arms, I wanted everything. We would be able to do it well because we had a damn guide book on what not to do.
As a string of people hopped up onto the stage and performed for the judges, I got lost in that image. I knew it was far too soon to start thinking about that now, but the idea still warmed my heart. It gave me glee to replace the nerves, which I had to admit was preferable.
Eventually, I spotted a glimpse of purple, which I knew belonged to Alissa. We’d painstakingly gone through all her clothes today, including the new ones that I brought her without her permission, and in the end, she’d gone for one that made her look dressy and professional all at once. I thought that she looked good in everything, but in this, she looked better than I’d ever seen her before.
I clutched onto the chair beside me so tightly that my knuckles went white as I sat up straighter. It took all that I had not to race up to join her where she was on the stage. Luckily, she had a confidence in her face which I hoped was an incredible sign.
“Is that her?” my new friend asked me.
“Yep,” I nodded and gulped all at once. “That’s her.”
“She’s too pretty to be your girlfriend. You should marry her already.”
As if that idea hadn’t crossed my mind every damn day. “Well, it’s a bit soon for that,” I answered diplomatically. “We haven’t been together long.”
The man shook his head and smirked. “When you know, you know. Don’t waste any time.”
I didn’t answer him because I overheard the conductor telling Alissa to start whenever she was ready. She took her seat and pulled out her clarinet and music stand. Then, there was a pause, one that lasted much too long. I sucked in a deep breath and forced myself to hold it in.
Don’t panic, I warned myself. Give her time, just be patient. But I didn’t feel that way inside. I felt twitchy and uncomfortable. I felt desperate and needy. I actually started to think that I might be going a bit crazy.
But then she pressed the instrument up to her lips, and she started to play the song that she’d been practicing for a very long time now. “Weber Clarinet Concerto No. 2.” I knew it better than any other song that I’d ever heard before, and now as she played it again, it sounded wonderful.
I wasn’t an expert, but the music sounded incredible to my ears, and it seemed like the people judging were very in to her playing. The further on the song went, the looser the knot of panic in my chest became, and it was replaced with an unbridled joy instead. I was so proud of Alissa, so happy with how far that she’d come. I was far more nervous than her – she looked like she really had it under control today, which was a million miles from where she had come.
I clasped my hands together tightly and beamed with pride as she slowly came to an end. Once Alissa finished her piece, she dipped her head and bowed happily, showing me that she thought that she’d done a good job too. If she thought she’d done well, then that had to be an amazing sign... She was the expert, after all.
One of the men from the judges moved over to her and whispered something in her ear. I had no idea what he was saying, and she wasn’t giving anything away by her expression. My heart pounded in my throat; the ice-cold nerves made their way through my veins again. I didn’t know what to do.
Then she vanished. She disappeared backstage leaving me utterly clueless.
“Good luck to your daughter,” I told the man sitting next to me as I leaped up and I gathered my things. “I hope she does well.”
Then I made my way into the hallway to wait for Alissa to meet me there. I paced up and down, checking my watch constantly. It was only moments, mere minutes where she was probably gathering herself together, but it felt like the longest few minutes of my entire life. I wanted, no needed to know what had been whispered into Alissa’s ear. It was driving me crazy.
“I got in!” I finally heard her scream from behind me. “I got in, can you believe it? They loved me so much that they offered me a place right away.”
She leaped up into my arms, and I held her close to me. “Of course, I believe it, you were amazing up there. You made me so proud.”
Alissa pulled back, and she gave me the happiest look ever before she crashed her lips into mine to kiss me. I could tell that she was thinking about her own transformation, too. I hadn’t been there, but once upon a time, not so long ago, she ran out from an audition just like this one because it freaked her out so much. She couldn’t hack it because she got so up in her head that she ran. Now she’d nailed it. She was incredible.
“Let’s go out to celebrate,” she gushed. “Let’s...have dinner or some drinks or something. I don’t know; I’m just so freaking happy.”
I took her hands in mine, and I gave her a proud stare. “I want to take you out to celebrate,” I insisted. “You deserve to do whatever the hell you want, but first I have something to show you.”
“You do?” She looked confused and rightfully so. I’d thought this was something that I would need her help for, but actually, it had come across me completely by accident. “What’s that?”
“I said to show you, not tell you,” I laughed. “You’re always so impatient, aren’t you?”
“Alright, alright, come on then.”
As we moved to leave the building, I spotted my friend with his arm around a young girl who was sobbing against him. It had to be Sadie, and presumably, it was bad news.
“Wait a moment,” I murmured to Alissa. “I’ll be back in a moment.”
I could feel her eyes burning into the back of my head, but I didn’t stop. As the guy sensed me walking towards him, he gave me a sad shake of the head.
“Sadie?” I spoke quietly to the girl. She turned to look at me with very wet eyes. “I’m sorry you didn’t get through today, that must be heart-breaking for you. I know how much bravery it takes to get up there.” She didn’t answer me; she continued to weep pitifully. “But I just wanted to tell you not to give up. If music is our passion, then it’ll happen for you at some point when the moment is right. Just keep on trying, okay?”
She nodded sadly, but her father mouthed his thanks to me. It didn’t mean much today, I wasn’t sure anything could overcome her sadness, but I hoped that my words would stick with her and she’d continue down the right path. If she kept at it, soon enough she’d get there in the end.
“What was that about?” Alissa asked me curiously as I joined her once more.
“Oh, you know me, just making dreams come true,” I joked. “Always spreading joy everywhere, I go.”
She didn’t ask me what I meant by that. Instead, she slipped her arm through mine, and she allowed me to lead her to where I needed to go.
***
“What is this?” Alissa gasped as we stood outside the crumbling down building of a charitable organization. “Why did you bring me here?”
“This is what I’m going to do,” I told her with pride.
“Restore old buildings?” Clearly, she didn’t get it. I rolled my eyes as I started to explain.
“No, the other day a guy came to the door collecting money for homeless teens in New York. Of course, I was interested, you know me, heart of gold.” She laughed happily at that one. “So, I asked him more details. In the end, it turned out that they were struggling so much to collect money that they were going to have to close their doors soon. They had all these plans to create housing for people who really need it, but it wasn’t going to happen.”
“So, you wrote them a big fat check?”
“I did more than that actually. I’m now a director of the organization. I want to help the people who need it most. I want to be involved with the building and positioning. I want to ensure that these teens get the right help and support that they need, and I also have this whole plan about job positioning.”
“You do?” Alissa looked a little bewildered about that. “When have you been doing all of this?”
“When you’ve been rehearsing.” I shrugged my shoulders and smiled. “I just want to do something meaningful with my life. I don’t need to work for money, I don’t want to work for the Stone Group, I want to do something that makes my life worthwhile, and that makes me happy too. This seems like the perfect way to achieve that.”
“Yeah, this is incredible,” she replied disbelievingly. “I can’t believe all of this, it’s amazing. You’re gonna do so well with that; I’m so proud of you.” She almost squealed with glee. “I can’t believe this; we’re both getting what we want. This is wonderful.”
“Especially you,” I murmured while pulling her in for a kiss. “I want you most of all. That’s what I’m happiest about.”
As we kissed and embraced one another, everything felt right with the world, like we really had our own little happy ever after. There would undoubtedly be bumps along the road, things wouldn’t be perfect, but this was one hell of a good start.