Chapter Thirty-Six
Sawyer
The second encore of the concert finished with “Lost.” The lyrics held a totally different meaning to me now after having heard Kurt play “Found” earlier. A song he’d written for me. Hearing him sing got me hot each and every time. It was as though his voice actually vibrated through me. I shifted trying to relieve a little bit of the pressure as the band walked to the end of the stage.
That man was mine. All mine.
His jeans hugged his ass in the most delicious way as he held his hands up in the air and soaked in the vibe from the crowd. It was causing me some serious libido issues. I wasn’t sure how I would make it through dinner without some relief. When Kurt turned back my way, his eyes sought mine, and I knew he could tell what I was thinking. That knowledge only amped that low hum within me.
Edge held his hands up in the sign of the horns in the way only rockers make believable. “Hell yeah, we rocked that shit.”
“Fuck, yeah!” Sykes added as he cleared the stage.
Harlem slapped Kurt on the back. The guys were awesome, but I only had eyes for one man. I sucked my lip between my teeth. We needed to find somewhere private.
Kurt came to me and cradled my face. “You keep looking at me like that, and I’m taking you back to my dressing room to fuck you.”
“Yes, please.”
The pupils in his eyes dilated.
Slapping Kurt’s back, Edge yelled, “We did it! We rocked the fucking wheels off this tour!”
“Yeah, we did.” Kurt’s eyes never left mine.
Edge waved a hand between our faces. “Earth to the lovebirds. Dinner in fifteen and then you can fuck all night long. I know I plan to.”
Geez…Sometimes Edge was so crass.
Within a second, Nina came up and slapped the back of his head. “Edge!”
Edge clapped. “So…dinner?”
I held back a giggle. “That sounds good.”
“Let me shower first. Meet outside at the car in…a half hour.” Oh, I knew that tone from Kurt.
Giving a big wink, Edge said, “Sure thing.” Then, he snapped his fingers. “You’re a genius. Make it forty-five.”
My insides pooled with desire as Kurt and I made our way down the hallway. People stopped Kurt to congratulate him. Some wanted to ask a question; others just wanted to shake his hand or give a fist-bump. It felt endless. If these people would just let me orgasm, I would answer questions all night long. Nearly fifteen minutes later, we made it back to his dressing room.
As we walked inside, we were all over each other kissing. Kurt’s hand drifted up my skirt and slipped under my panties. “I’m going to take you from behind as you watch in the mirror.”
I groaned and threw my head back as Kurt stroked my clit, building me up from within.
“You want two orgasms, baby?”
“Yes!”
With a little more pressure, I detonated, the pleasure coursing through me. He ran his nose along my jawline. “So sensitive.”
I whimpered as Kurt pushed a finger inside. It wasn’t nearly enough. What I needed was raw, carnal lust. “I thought you said you were going to fuck me.”
As the last syllable left my mouth, Kurt spun me around. “Dress up, baby. Put your palms on the table.”
Our eyes connected in the mirror’s reflection. The telltale sound of a zipper coming down made me squirm. Kurt dragged his hands up my legs and pulled my black dress up.
In one movement, he grabbed my hips and thrust inside me with a hiss. The sweet euphoria of feeling his cock inside me had me closing my eyes in satisfaction.
“Look at me, Sawyer.”
The commanding tone sent tingles through my body, and I looked up to see his face in the mirror. I pushed against Kurt as he pulled out and then thrust back in again. “Hold on, baby!”
“Faster!”
Kurt increased his speed, and I stiffened my arms to hold on. “Yes!” I screamed as he pounded into me.
One final thrust inside, and Kurt stiffened and released inside me. “You wreck me.”
“Anytime you sing…you take a piece of my soul.”
He pulled out of me and gently turned me to face him, his eyes tender. “Was I too rough?”
“Absolutely not.”
My eyes caught something on the couch across the room. Is that blood? The image stunned me into silence, and Kurt said words I couldn’t understand. Blinking rapidly, I tried to clear the image, thinking I must be imagining the words written on the wall. I grabbed onto Kurt as my legs became weak at the sight of the bloody baby with the knife sticking out of it on the couch.
“Sawyer!”
Kurt tightened his grip, thankfully keeping me upright because all I could do was stare.
“Sawyer! What’s wrong?” He grew more concerned as he touched my stomach, my face, and then my head.
Kurt shook my shoulders, but I couldn’t move or speak, and my tongue felt swollen—like a giant cotton ball. With a shaking finger, I pointed. Kurt turned, muttering a stream of curses when his eyes landed on the sight before us. A baby doll with a knife in its stomach and covered in red liquid lay on the couch. Behind the couch, the words my baby slashed red on the wall. He turned me away from the gruesome image.
In a fraction of a second, Kurt was on the phone. “Yes, my dressing room. Get in here now.”
That image. My baby. Instinctively, my hand touched my stomach where I felt Dylan kick. I took several deep breaths.
The door burst open, and I further leaned into Kurt, my heart skipping a beat or two.
“We need to get you guys out of here, sir.” I recognized Steve’s—the head of security—voice. But I refused to turn around.
Kurt softened his tone. “Sawyer, close your eyes until we get you out of here.”
I kept them closed. I never wanted to see that image again. Before we began to move, I heard Edge.
“Holy motherfucker!”
Cringing, I squeezed my eyes tighter and gripped onto Kurt to nearly the point of pain. Focus on Kurt’s smell, his touch, his heartbeat.
“Edge, keep anyone else from seeing this. I mean no one. Do you understand?” There was a pause. “Edge!” Kurt was losing his patience.
“Yeah, man. I swear.”
“Sawyer, can you walk or do you want me to carry you?” Kurt asked.
Carry or walk? Carry or walk? Where are we going?
Lips pressed against my forehead. “Sawyer, what do you want?”
“Carry me.”
Kurt put his arms under my knees and lifted me in the air. I squeezed my eyes tighter, but the image still burned in my mind.
“We’re out of the room, you can open your eyes.”
Concerned faces gathered around, watching us. It felt like I was in a fog, not able to process much as I kept seeing the baby doll lying on the couch. So many people echoed the same sentiment as we passed by. “Is Sawyer okay? The baby?”
“The baby is fine. Just a long day,” Kurt said.
That was an understatement. The further we moved away from the scene, the less dirty I felt. Someone had been in Kurt’s room. Someone so sick and twisted that they’d come into someone’s private space and done that. It was morbid.
Kurt set me on my feet near the exit and waited until he knew I was steady before letting go. “We need to get to the tour bus.”
So, he had an idea of what was happening. My mind raced with possibilities. “What’s going on?”
“We need to get on the bus. We’ll talk there. Promise.”
Kurt pulled out his phone, not giving me much of a chance to speak. “All clear? You sure? Okay, we’re on our way.” His tone was urgent and worried, which escalated my fear.
Are they still here? Watching us?
“Sawyer?”
I focused back on Kurt as he ended the call. “We’re going to walk out. It would be better if you could walk in case there are any paparazzi watching.”
“I can do that.” I could hear how strange and detached my own voiced sounded.
The door opened. It was then I realized we had two security members with us, one behind and one in front. Kurt held my hand as we walked out into the open air. Smile. Appear pleasant. My eyes darted around as I wondered if the person had hung around to watch. I needed to get a grip for when we talked, get my senses together.
A security man met us at the bus. I couldn’t place his name—maybe Tim or Hank. “All’s clear, sir.”
“Give me ten minutes. Then I want to know how the hell someone got past the team and into my fucking dressing room.”
“Yes, sir.”
We walked up the steps of the bus, and I sat on the leather couch. Have they ever been in here? Stop letting your imagination get ahead of itself. Hear Kurt out. I took another deep breath and noticed my hands were shaking. George sensed something was wrong and hopped up on the couch to rest his head on my lap. His soft fur soothed me as I ran my fingers through it.
Kurt sat on my other side. “The stalker who initially sent the first letter hasn’t gone away.”
Say what? The person who sent me that nasty letter hadn’t gone away. Did I hear him right? “What?” It came out a little harsher than I’d intended, and Kurt winced.
“The letters have increased in hate and frequency. The security team has been trying to figure out where they’re coming from, but there are no fingerprints and they’ve been postmarked from random cities across America. They aren’t any of the places we’ve toured. There’s no rhyme or reason to it.” He ran his fingers through his hair and exhaled.
Hurt washed over me. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I thought it would be over by now. I was worried that between your parents, finding out you were pregnant…this might be too much. I was trying to protect you.”
The rational side of me understood. But I hated secrets. “When were you going to tell me?”
“After we got home from the tour.”
So many thoughts ran through my head. I knew Kurt’s heart; he always had the best of intentions, though sometimes they were misguided. “Have the notes been as bad as what I just saw?”
“Yes, but this psycho actually got past security tonight, which brings it to a new level.”
Do I want to know what the notes said? No. If the threats were worse than what I’d initially got, I was better off not knowing at this point. I took a deep breath, trying to remain calm. “You can’t keep stuff like this from me, Kurt. Ever. I get why, but you can’t. It won’t be healthy for us or the baby if I’m constantly wondering if you’re hiding something.”
“Sawyer—”
I held up my hand. “No, there is no compromise on this. When it’s this bad, I should have known. What if I’ve talked to this person? I haven’t been on guard at all. Shit. This is bad. I wouldn’t have wanted to see the threats, but I should have known about them.”
For a second, Kurt ground his teeth. “You’re right. It’s just…I…”
I squeezed his hand; I knew this was hard. Kurt really had no experience with serious relationships. At times, I forgot because we got along so well. “I get it. I do. Your heart was in the right place. But I should have been given the choice.”
“I get it. I’m sorry.”
“You’re forgiven.” At least he understood my side, too. So much of a relationship was understanding that it was a two-way street.
There was a knock at the door, and Kurt called out, “Come in.”
The big, burly security guy, Steve, came up the stairs. To blend, all security wore jeans and T-shirts like groupies.
“Sir, the guard outside your room said the caterer came through with fresh water as per protocol. The ID matched the list, facial recognition was completed. From there, she left the secured area.”
She’s an employee? I had so many questions, but I let Kurt take the lead. “So we have a picture of this person? An ID?”
“Yes, we’re on our way now with the police. With the evidence, they’ll be able to pick up Jennifer Terrance for questioning.”
Jennifer Terrance. Such a normal name. At least she would be off the streets, unable to get to us.
“What do you suggest we do next?”
Pausing, Steve listened to something in his earpiece before giving a few commands into his radio. To Kurt, he said, “If you’re up for it, I think leaving for Orlando tonight would be best. I’ve coordinated with Mr. Shaw’s head of security at Shaw Tower. Joe is ready. That’s where we can keep you the safest while we try to locate Jennifer Terrance and question her in case she had any accomplices.”
Accomplices? “We might be dealing with more than one person?”
“Ms. Wade, we don’t know at this point, but we’re preparing for all scenarios.”
Kurt looked to me. “You okay to leave tonight?”
I liked that he involved me in the decision versus just telling me what to do. “Yes, I would rather not be here if that woman is still on the loose. Or any of her accomplices.”
“Hopefully not after tonight, ma’am.”
Hopefully.
Kurt’s brows furrowed. “Doesn’t all this seem kind of convenient? I mean, we’ve been trying to get something on her for a while now, and on the last night of the tour, she conveniently hands over her identity.”
From the look on Steve’s face, he’d already thought of this.
“Yes, Mr. Hendrix. I don’t believe we know the entire story yet.”