Chapter Thirty-Seven
Kurt
Motherfucker.
Rage surged beneath my skin, but I tried like hell to rein it in. Someone got through security and into my dressing room. From Steve’s tone, I knew he wasn’t sold on this bitch handing over her identity so easily.
Thank fuck this tour was over. Otherwise, I’d be canceling it. We were loaded up on the plane and about to take off after haphazardly throwing stuff into suitcases. I knew Sawyer was upset because she never tried to refold or organize any of my shit.
As we ascended into the air, I squeezed Sawyer’s hand. “I’m sorry for not telling you.”
“I know. And you had good intentions. Just, please, don’t do it again.”
From the way she picked at her fingernail, I could tell she was torn up inside. I needed her to trust me. “I won’t. I don’t want to lose your trust.”
“You haven’t. You won’t. We’re still trying to find our rhythm. We disagreed; you heard me out. And we came to a solution.”
This was still all foreign territory to me. With my parents, they fought, my dad stormed off, and my mother cried. Nothing was ever solved when I was a kid. This was different. It made sense. It wasn’t drama filled with threats and empty promises. And most importantly, there was forgiveness.
Sawyer looked me in the eye and then gave me a small smile. It broke my heart to see her so sad. “Have you heard anything from Steve?”
I pulled out my phone and looked at the screen. When it rained, it fucking poured.
Doug: I’d like to meet for dinner to celebrate your birthday and discuss our arrangement.
“Cocksucker,” I spat.
“What’s wrong?” Sawyer focused her attention on me.
“My father is looking for his yearly dinner date.”
“What does he want every year? Why?”
Sawyer knew about the dinner date, but I hadn’t gone into the specifics about why. After the one time we talked about it, it never came up. And he wasn’t worth the breath.
“Money. He threatens to send stories about Mom’s attempted suicide to the papers. So I pay him because I don’t want Mom to suffer.”
Sawyer’s eyes flashed with anger. “He’s a sperm donor douche canoe.”
Even in a time as serious as this, my girl could get me to smile. “Will you come with me this year?”
“Absolutely. I just hope I can bite my tongue.”
That was doubtful. A little part of me worried it might scare Sawyer to see how much I resembled my father—in looks and voice. Someone that similar had to be wired the same way.
I love Sawyer. I will not hurt her or Dylan.
Sawyer put her hand to my cheek. “You are not your father.”
“How do you know?” It would help a hell of a lot if I didn’t have to worry about it nearly every second of every day.
“Did your father ever keep a promise?”
I thought back to my childhood. He’d promised to teach me to ride a bike. That never happened. He’d promised to take me fishing. That never happened. Besides self-serving shit, nothing he’d ever said came to be. “Not really.”
“Well, you’re already different.” She must have seen the confusion on my face because I wasn’t following her. “You’ve kept your promise to Dylan to watch over Knoah. You made a promise to be there for me and our baby. You stayed by me even when you were completely freaked out.”
“Sawyer, that’s different.”
“No, it’s not. You’re not your father. You are your own person. I’m not my parents. I could never be as cold and heartless to a child of my own as they’ve been to me, regardless of what Dylan ever does.”
Do I cut him out of my life and risk hurting my mom? It was a no-win situation. “So, are you saying don’t have dinner with him?”
“Do whatever you want to do. If he’s a self-serving prick, do you want him in our child’s life? I don’t want my parents in mine. He doesn’t have the control; you do. Your sandbox, your rules.”
This bit about her parents was news to me. I wasn’t sure how we were going to proceed down that path. Sawyer’s parents hadn’t acknowledged the news of her pregnancy, and she didn’t want to call them. I knew one thing—they weren’t going to fuck with my family.
Sawyer continued, “Our kids will be surrounded by love. They’ll have Lana, Cameron, Monica, Knoah, Garrick, Edge, Harlem, Sykes, Nina…all those people will be there for our child. Blood isn’t a necessity to make a family. I’ve learned this on the tour. Before, I was obsessed getting my parents to love me because it was what I pictured a family should be. But what happened to Mattie was an accident. I would have traded my life to save hers.”
“I agree. I’ll think about how I want to proceed with him.” It was time for me to move forward and stop punishing myself. I deserved some fucking happiness.
The wheels touched down on the runway, and my phone blew up with texts. It was the band checking on Sawyer. I sent one response to all of them.
Me: Landed in Orlando. Sawyer’s doing okay. I’m ready to catch this bitch. Sorry to leave you guys with the closing of the tour.
Edge: Take care of Sawyer. We’ve got this.
Harlem: What Edge said. I think we’ve smoothed over the crew’s concerns. They were worried about Sawyer. Per Steve’s directions, we let them know she was exhausted and needed some rest.
Sykes: Let us know if you need anything.
Me: Thanks, guys.
I also had a message from Steve to call him.
Sawyer busied herself gathering her things as I pressed Call.
“Hello?”
“Steve. Kurt.”
“We went to Jennifer Terrance’s residence. She was already dead.”
Oh, shit. I closed my eyes and dragged a hand down my face. Will this ever end? “What happened?”
“It appears to be a homicide.”
“Are you serious?”
Sawyer stopped and sat beside me when she heard me. Is this woman an accomplice or a victim? There was some shuffling on the other end before Steve came back. “Yes. Ms. Terrance’s ID has not been located. The coroner believes she’s been dead around seventy hours. The two days prior to this, she reported to work sick. Today she appears to have come to the concert, worked long enough to visit your room, and gone home sick, according to her coworkers. She had laryngitis.”
“Motherfucker.” Whoever the fuck this woman was, she needed to be caught and out of our lives.
“Pretty much. We’re asking the police to dust for fingerprints. It’s a crime scene now, so we’re not allowed on the premises. They’re working on allowing my team to help theirs since they’re backlogged. I should know within the hour. Until then, the cops aren’t letting anything happen except the removal of the body. The good news is they’re cooperating. But we don’t have whoever is behind this. We tracked the stalker through the camera feeds. She had no interaction with anyone we saw except with security. Proper protocols were followed through this.”
This wasn’t good news. “Keep me posted.”
“I will. I’m calling Joe’s team next. He’s offered to dig into Sawyer’s parents’ past since he already had a good bit of information. I think he’s found something. I can patch him through, or do you want to find out when you get there?”
If it was bad, in the car wasn’t the place to tell Sawyer. I wanted her home, in a place I knew was safe. “Tell him to come to the apartment when we get there.”
Before we got off the plane, I needed to inform Sawyer.
Shit.