Siarra

 When we approached the door, the first thing I noticed was screaming. The second was thumps and crashing. Lastly, the door wasn’t fully closed… it looked as though it’d been broken in. The wood from the door frame was broken and I could see the lock was still out as if it’d been in place at some point, but the door was forced open.

Addilyn was frozen in fright and shock as we listened to the sounds coming from the apartment, but my heart was beating too fast and too strong to comprehend what was going on. Her confusion also struck me as odd, granted I don’t think whatever it was that shook her up had all this commotion and a broken door anywhere in her imagination.

When she jumped and screamed and fell into the wall, I grabbed onto courage I didn’t know I had and turned to her. “Sweetheart stay here let me see what’s going on.”

She shook her head and reached out to me. “Please no, I’m scared.”

I frowned. “Is this normal?” I asked.

She seemed to think for a second and a loud curse came from the apartment and she shook her head. “I don’t know what’s happening.” I could feel her shaking as she clenched onto me with all her might.

I shook my head. I couldn’t leave her, and I technically couldn’t just take her like this. I needed to know. “I’ll be fine Addie, I promise.” I dug into my bag. “Here’s my phone, you call 911 and hide if you think you need to okay?” on second thought… “Here’s my car key too, you can hide in there.”

She hesitated but then took my offered items and nodded. “Ok.” It was a barely there whisper but it was enough for me.

I nodded and pointed to an area where she would be out of sight. After she tucked herself in, I steeled my nerves to prepare myself. I might as well be walking on stilts at his point, I felt like the universe itself was so far gone. I tip toed my way to the door and pushed it open as discreetly as possible.

The place was a wreck. There was furniture overturned, papers on the floor along with glass from things that were now broken. I’d never seen the inside of her home, but even in its distorted state I could tell they didn’t have much and whatever they did have looked unsalvageable at this point.

Her aunt screamed something as she pointed an accusing finger across the room. I followed the direction in which she was pointing to see a man being held up against a wall by his neck by someone about three times his size. He was sporting a leather vest with the local motorcycle club emblem on the back.

“Where the fuck is she?” the beast growled.

“I don’t fucking know! I told you I didn’t know, now please put him down… don’t hurt him.” Her aunt cried.

I could only guess the “she” they were talking about was Addilyn. The man released the small man and turned around. The first thing I noticed was his eyes. They were squinting and dark. He ran a hand through his hair. “Look Maggie, how the fuck don’t you know where she is? You’re supposed to be taking care of her.” His tone was even, but everything else about it screamed rage.

She growled and pulled her hair in frustration. “Not like it was my fucking choice! She ain’t my damn kid, what the fuck… she fucking disappears with that woman all the fucking time. Hell, if I know what the shit the girl is up to.”

He took a step towards her. “What fucking woman?” he asked.

She made a face like she was over the conversation and pointed at me. I hadn’t realized anyone noticed me in the room. I wanted to turn and run, but I couldn’t. His gaze swung to me and his eyes scanned me from head to toe. I felt a little shiver run through me.

“Who the fuck are you?” he asked roughly.

“Me?” yeah, I know. Stupid… but hell it fit how I was feeling at the moment.

“Yes, the fuck you. Do you see anyone else standing over there?” he snapped.

That snapped me out of my little haze and replaced it with a drop of pissed off-ness. Who did he think he was talking to me like that? “I’m Sia.” I said putting my hands on my hips. “And who are you?” I asked.

He gave me this incredulous look like I was supposed to already know the answer to that question. He never did answer me though. “Where is Addilyn?” he asked.

Oh no buddy. That was not how this was going to work. Just the thought of my sweet little friend outside gave me some confidence. “Who are you? I’m not telling you anything about Addie until I know you won’t hurt her.”

He growled. Honest to God growled. “This ain’t none of your fucking business. That ain’t your kid, now where is she little girl? I have shit to do, and we need to get a move on, I don’t wanna have to hurt you.”

Yea, threaten me and think I’m going to trust you with the kid… not so smart dude. “Uh, no. That’s not how this is going to work – “

He cut me off. “Fuck you care so much for?” he was curious.

I frowned, is he serious? “What do you mean why do I care. I care about her, and I’m not going to make an intentional decision that puts her in harm’s way. I don’t know you, and have you taken a look at the surroundings… what I just walked in seeing? You can’t honest to God think that I’ll just hand her over to you… whoever you are… because you asked so sweetly.”

His gaze hardened, and he fixed me with a glare that would normally have me running into the nearest hole to hide. Right now, though, I met his glare head on. I wasn’t backing down, I refused to. When he made no attempt to answer I shrugged and turned on my heel to leave. That got him moving. Right, so fucking fast I didn’t see him move until I was bumping into his hard chest that was currently blocking my exit.

“Listen, you mouthy little shit, I’m not going to spend my time explaining myself to you. She’s not staying here another fucking night; now can you please tell me where she is?” Jesus, the please came out of him so painfully.

I shrugged. But before I could speak up, her aunt beat me to it. “I don’t give a shit what the fuck you two do… but can you both get the fuck out? I don’t want the brat here anyway, good fucking riddance.”

The look he gave her was downright threatening. He didn’t even say anything, but his eyes said it all. She saw it too because her mouth snapped shut and she paled. “This isn’t over Maggie.” Whatever that meant was serious because she shrank back and began to shake. His gaze swung to me. “I’m going to find her… you stay the hell away from her you hear me?” then he stormed away.

I stood there for a couple of minutes before turning my attention to the aunt. She was beginning to resemble normal, shaking off the fear he instilled in her and that annoyed look was coming back. I knew she was about to kick me out, but I needed information from her.

“Is he dangerous?” I asked.

She gave me a look like I was stupid. “You fucking serious? You can’t be that naïve… you’re asking me if Psycho is dangerous?”

I must’ve looked as clueless as I felt. “Fuck… where the hell you all from? One of those rich, Hoity toity neighborhoods or something? Everyone around here knows who the fuck he is. He’s the president of The Rulers of Darkness. They don’t call him Psycho for nothing.”

Holy fuck, that didn’t sound good. “What does he want with Addilyn?”

She shrugged. “Fuck if I know honestly… but apparently he just found out about his daughter and was none too happy to find out she’d been living here after her momma ran off with a trucker when she was five. I only let her talk me into taking the girl in for the checks and she stays out my fucking hair. He wants her, he can have her. He won’t stop my checks so good riddance.”

Her father. Fucking hell, this was a nightmare.

“What am I supposed to do?” I asked.

She gave me a knowing look. “Listen, I ain’t snitch on you. I know she around here somewhere otherwise you wouldn’t be here. Dropping her off right?” I nodded. “You should’ve just let him take the girl, he ain’t gonna leave her alone and he gonna find out eventually you have her.”

I frowned. “That I have her?”

She nodded. “I ain’t taking her back in here… he’ll be back, and I am not dealing with his raft. No ma’am, you stuck your nose into it then it should be your head he bites off. She ain’t worth the trouble, but you on your own there with her. I’d wish you luck, but you’d need more than I can offer ya.”

I took that as my signal to leave and figure things out. I knew one thing though; I wasn’t going to leave her stranded. I thought to ask for some of her things but thought better of it. She didn’t really need any of the crap she had if I were to truly be honest with myself. I gave her a firm nod and left. Addilyn was exactly where I left her, looking petrified. I expelled a long breath before crouching before her.

“Hey Addie, how do you feel about coming home with me for a bit?” I asked. She didn’t need to know about everything right now. She needed to get into a warm home and ready for bed.

Her face lit up. “You mean it?” she asked as though she couldn’t believe what I was offering to her.

I nodded. “I do, what do you say?”

She nodded enthusiastically. At least for tonight, I can make her happy. I reached out for her hand, and she happily accepted it before she trailed behind me back to my car. I made the long drive back to my place. I lived in a modest home… it wasn’t expensive or anything, but it was mine. I had two guest bedrooms that were nice when I had company. My closest friends had moved away, and it was great to have enough space for us all to visit together.

“You live here?” she gasped when we entered into the foyer.

I nodded. “I do.”

She looked at me in awe. “I love it!” she squealed before she took off to inspect my place.

I usually had a meal when I came home, so I went about throwing on some burgers, and then headed upstairs to my room to change clothes. She found me in there just as I was slipping on a tank top.

“Are you sure it’s ok if I stay here?” she asked.

I nodded. “Of course! I put some burgers on for us.”

She smiled then looked at my clothes then down at hers. “I don’t have anything to wear to bed.”

I forgot about the whole clothes thing. The Target, down the street, was 24 hours. When I got her to bed, I could run over there and pick up some things for her until I can get to a clothes store… maybe during my lunch break tomorrow. I rummaged through my drawers looking for some clothes that might be too small for me for her to throw on for the night. I found some sweat pants and an old t-shirt. They would be big, but they were just to sleep in anyway.

“Let me show you to your room.” I led her right down the hall to the closest guest bedroom to my own room.

She looked around and smiled. “I can have a bed?”

I frowned. “What do you mean?” I asked.

She blushed. “At Aunt Maggie’s house, I just pile a bunch of blankets and sheets on the floor. There’s a whole bed in here.”

Again, I wanted to strangle that woman. “Well, in that case yes. You have the whole bed… the whole room to yourself.”

She smiled. “Thank you so much Ms. Sia.”

I rubbed her head. “Anytime, and, you can just call me Sia… how’s that?”

“It’s all perfect, thank you.”

I returned her smile. “Ok, you get yourself changed. There’s a bathroom right down the hall if you want to freshen up. There’s extra toothbrushes and everything in the cabinet so have at it. I’m going to check on the food. Do you want cheese on your burger?”

She nodded. “Yes please.”

“Ok, I’ll go watch the food. When you’re ready, you can come on downstairs.” I told her.

“Ok, I will be down in a few minutes.”

I left her to it and finished up the food. As she said, she was down in a few minutes and hung out in the kitchen with me while I fixed up the burgers to our likings. We ate together and retired to the living room. When I gave her, the remote and told her to knock herself out, she was so excited I was afraid she’d piss her pants. I found out not too long later, that TV was a rare form of entertainment that she got at home. There was only a television in the living room – which I know is now broken – and one in her aunt’s room. She spent most of her time condemned to her bedroom. That would definitely explain the books.

I felt guilty. I needed to talk to her, badly, about today’s events. I needed her to know she had a dad and he wanted her… but what was I supposed say? I couldn’t really come out and tell her that her dad, Psycho, wanted her all of a sudden. I knew nothing about her past or anything. I shook my head to think of more pertinent details… she’s supposed to start school in two weeks. I couldn’t keep her home and I needed to fucking work! My hours wouldn’t allow me that flexibility to be there when she came home. What would I do in the interim? Keep her at the library? Well that’s not really odd, that’s what she did before… but what does she want? I’m not even her legal guardian; I can’t just sign her up for school, can I? You’d think that my degree in child education would have given me some guidance in this! Maybe I can be her guardian… make them surrender her rights to me. Psycho man would never go for that if his earlier tantrum was any indication. Plus, this might be like a slumber party or something for her and she’d be over this tomorrow. Will he come back for her or was that a spur of the moment thing? I mean, he was a gang banger… surely he didn’t really want her in his life, right? Right Sia, you have this all figured out… you know exactly what you’re doing. Ugh! This is so much more complicated than anything I’ve ever experienced in my goddamn life.

When we were finished with dinner, Addie let out a big yawn before announcing that she was tired. She headed up to bed and I waited until I knew she was out for the night before getting myself dressed. I went next door to my neighbors, an awfully sweet elderly couple, and told them I had a relative staying over and asked if they’d mind sitting while I ran to grab her some things. Of course, Mrs. Henderson offered up her services immediately and I was on my way to Target.

Everything was going fine, I swear it was. Right up until the point when I realized I’d practically circled the entire store twice and the cart was still totally empty except for the pack of razors I placed in there for myself. I stopped for a minute to think about just what the heck I was even doing. I was so out of my league right now and I had no damn clue up until now.

I mean, I figured this was simple. I was just supposed to get some things she’d need for a couple of days. I was a woman, she was a female it shouldn’t be that hard. But then that was the problem wasn’t it? She was a nine-year-old little girl. She didn’t need the same things as me and I realized I didn’t know what the hell to get for her. I should’ve really made a list.

I took a few deep breaths to ground myself. I would need to take this one step at a time. Walk through the day and think of everything she might need. Ok, so first things first, she’s going to come with me to work. She’ll need clean clothes. With a nod to myself, I roamed over to the child’s clothing department. Underclothes first… socks, t-shirts, underwear, training bra? I wasn’t sure, but I picked up a few anyway just in case. I mean, I could always return whatever she didn’t need. Now clothes. It was still summer, but it was coming to an end. Long pants were the best bet; she’d get more use out of them. I picked up a few pairs of jeans, track pants, and sweat pants. Then, I grabbed a few different adorable looking shirts. Next, I grabbed some pajama sets for her. I looked at the cart and grinned, progress!

Hmm now what? Right she’d need to eat. Granted she usually ate with me, but we’d need some snacks and kid juices would probably be nice. I needed to go grocery shopping anyway. I could just grab a couple things for tomorrow and she can tell me what she likes when we go food shopping after work tomorrow.

About that… things she liked. I know she liked to read, but there had to be other things that she could entertain herself with. I mean, she read for hours at the library. I went towards the back of the store where the toys and electronics were. I grabbed some board games and DVD’s. I wasn’t sure if she was into Barbie dolls and things, I’d have to ask her… or better yet, we can stop back tomorrow before we went home. That was an even better idea.

I was making my way out of electronics when something caught my eye. I backed up and looked at it. The price tag was awfully high, I mean I didn’t even have one for myself, but I knew enough about them. I could always log her into my amazon account and she can read books on the Kindle app like I do on my phone. Plus, she can buy games and do a bunch of other things on it.

That fucking price tag was like a big red sign. I sighed, what the fuck? A onetime splurge in how many years? It was totally worth it for her. After getting someone from the electronics department to unlock the case and ring me up… I was now the proud owner of an iPad, which wouldn’t be mine in the morning when I surprised Addie with it. I lit up at the thought of her reaction to the gift.

I went to the beauty department and grabbed some barrettes and things for her hair, some kid detangler for her crazy curls and a few other little cute accessories they had. They even had those cute little plastic bangles. I made sure to grab some bubble bath and a few other little things I could remember enjoying as a child then moved to checkout.

I was pretty goddamn proud of myself when I loaded the purchases into the car. Other than my mini freak-out in the beginning I was able to get a hold of the situation and I think I did a pretty good job at it.

When I got home, I thanked Mrs. Henderson who informed me that she hadn’t even been able to tell someone was in the house and walked her out. I left the bags in the living room deciding I’d go through everything with her in the morning.

I was exhausted, so it took no effort at all on my part to get my butt in bed and to sleep. Tomorrow was going to be a long day.