Tim caught himself dreaming about a new life, on his way back to Manhattan. As intriguing as his friend’s suggestion had sounded, he was not convinced that going back to breaking into people’s houses was an option. He had always enjoyed the thrill; he loved the rush that burglaries gave him, but he no longer desired that. Tim had found something different than just a temporary sensation: the possibility of having a normal life, with a loving woman by his side. So far, such thoughts had not even crossed his mind. It was then that he realized just how much power Josephine had over him. Tim had never allowed anyone to have control over his life; yet, for her, he would gladly make an exception. To him, the idea of being with her made it worthwhile.

It was 5:00am when he walked into his sister’s apartment and, as one would expect, it was completely dark. Josephine was not in the living room. Tim went to the bedroom adjacent to Caitlin’s but she was not there, either. Immediately, he started worrying about her. But, it didn’t take him long to discover what had transpired. There was a white, thick envelope in the living room, behind the armchair, one that he had failed to notice earlier. He bent down and picked it up. The envelope front read. He tore it open only to find a letter:

“To Tim”

“My dear Tim,

I read what happened in North Haven. It’s all over the internet. It looks like you and your friend were successful. I’ll never know how people can do such things. Aren’t they afraid of getting caught? Or of prison, maybe? I’m not judging. It’s just that I could never do what you did tonight.

A few minutes ago, I received a phone call from the University of Paris. I applied there, on the day that you and Laura visited me in my lab. They love my work. They said that they would be happy to have me on board. That phone call made my decision so much easier…

You see, I wouldn’t have accepted that money. I just couldn’t. You have every right to be mad at me; I agreed to this and I’m the reason you did it for, but I could never live with myself, knowing that I took someone else’s money. It’s not right; it’s unethical, even. It doesn’t matter who you stole it from. The only thing that matters is that you stole it.

When Paul mentioned that you’d be working at the facility, I lost it. I started yelling at him, thinking that burglars are terrible people. But, you’ve been proving me wrong, since I met you. And tonight, you did the noblest thing anyone’s ever done for me. You risked your life, so that I could keep my job. You could have been shot or arrested, so that a crazy scientist like me could keep experimenting on her chimpanzees. My God, what did I put you through? I don’t know if I can ever forgive myself for making you do this…

Please, forgive me, Tim. Not just because you committed a crime for my sake. I’m very sure you don’t regret it; that’s the kind of person you are. Forgive me, for not having the heart to say ‘goodbye’ to you in person. I know it’s a lot to ask. Leaving you is a horrible thing, but, you should know that it’s perhaps the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to do. It really breaks my heart, knowing that I will not see your face tomorrow morning: the face of the man who stood by me; who gave me hope; who did everything in his power to make me happy, even though he didn’t know me that well. If only I could go back in time… That way, I would do what you suggested sooner and spend some more time with you. God, what I wouldn’t do to see you again… Touch you… Kiss you… Feel you.

I’ll never forget you, Tim Shaw. I will never forget the outlaw who stole my heart and went out his way for me. He will always be the man of my dreams. I was able to have him for a short while and, although reality drove us apart, he will always hold a special place in my heart. He is the sweetest, bravest and toughest man I’ve ever met. I will miss him, much more than words can say.

Love,

Josephine

Tim’s world fell apart. Two tears spilled from his eyes and rushed down his cheeks, as her letter slipped through his fingers. Losing her was too much for him to bear. He dropped to his knees, squeezing his eyes shut, wishing that he could see her one last time. Tim felt someone staring at him, but he didn’t even have the heart to turn to see who it was. Only when he felt Caitlin’s slender arms being wrapped around his neck did he discover who it was.

“I’m sorry,” She whispered, resting her head on his back. “I liked this one; she was nice.”

“Why did she leave, Caitlin?” He heaved a long, painful sigh. “Tell me why.”

“I read her diary.” She stated, caressing his shoulder. “She left it in the bedroom. I tried to talk to you when you came in, but you didn’t hear me. I saw you reading the letter; so I got curious.”

“It’s ok,” Tim whispered. “Just give me an answer.”

“It’s pretty clear, big brother,” said Caitlin, voicing her opinion, and leaning back. “She felt guilty about this relationship. It’s weird, though. The handwriting is the same and yet, this letter and her diary seem like they were written by two different people.”

“Care to explain?” He complained, a groan of frustration leaving his mouth.

“Well…” She started in a high pitched voice. “In her journal, she just says that she lusts over you. She tries to remain dignified. She uses fancy words, not everyday language. But with this letter?” She paused and pointed at the piece of paper on the floor. “This letter was written by a woman very much in love. There’s a lot of emotion in it. She’s different; she speaks freely. She sounds like an everyday woman.”

“She’s gone.” Tim croaked, looking down at her over his right shoulder. “What difference does it make?”

“Oh, my God…” Caitlin whispered, reaching her arm towards his face. Cupping his cheek, she ran her thumb across his cheekbone. “This is the difference, Tim. There’s still love there. You’ll find each other again.”

“I don’t think I want to hear this.” He grumbled, standing up to his impressive, 6’2” stature. “She’s on her way to France, Caitlin. I can’t leave the country. Term of my parole, remember? But even if I could, I wouldn’t follow her. She didn’t talk to me; she just up and went away.”

“You’re right about that,” Caitlin nodded, rising from the floor. “I was there when she got that phone call. She went to the kitchen; I couldn’t hear what she said. She was really upset when she came back. Last night, she kept asking questions about you. She wanted to know more about your childhood. And guess what? She did the same thing tonight.”

“Stop it, ok? Just stop!” Tim cried, his watery eyes dark with sadness. “Whose side are you on, anyway?”

“Yours!” She affirmed, raising her tone as well. “I’m just trying to make you see that it’s not over between you two.”

Overwhelmed by frustration and sorrow, Tim spoke no more. The air around him had become too thick; he felt like he was drowning. Desperate for some fresh air, he turned his body left and marched towards the door.

“Tim, wait!” Tim kept walking as if he heard no words coming from his sister. He would not stay there any longer. Slamming her door behind him, he once again got lost in his thoughts…

“There’s still love there” my ass. If there was any love, she would have said something to me, she would have trusted me. She wouldn’t have left. Damn it, Joey… I put my trust in you and you just… walked out of my life. Why did you say ‘yes’ when I asked you out? Why did you make me believe I could have a future with you? Stop asking these questions, Tim. You’re never going to get any answers…