Chapter Thirty-Two
AFTER THEY RETURNED from New York, real life came back in earnest. Orders for a bridal shower and a wedding came in on short notice, and Lizzie would be busy for the next few weeks meeting with the bride and groom. She’d reluctantly fallen back into the routine for the Naked Baker, and that bothered her. She hadn’t been reluctant before. Even if she hadn’t necessarily wanted to spend her evenings filming, editing, and analyzing the show, she’d always gone in willingly. She knew that was because there’d never been an inkling of a way out from under the show while still making enough money to help Maddy. But the network’s email had changed that. She’d dared to hope for more of a life with Blue, for evenings spent doing whatever they felt like doing rather than structured by her webcast schedule.
The bright light to the whole situation was that, true to his word, Blue had been amazingly supportive of her efforts with the show and supportive of her in every other way as well. They’d been staying at her place, and she felt him everywhere. His clothes were in her closet and in two of the dresser drawers. His toiletries were in her bathroom, and he’d hung a hook on the wall by the kitchen door for their keys. It felt like they’d always been together, but even stronger than his tangible possessions, his love filled every nook and cranny of her life. It was in the air she breathed and in the look in his eyes. And when he wasn’t with her, his love remained.
Blue was up early every morning, which she loved, because they got ready for work together, making love in the shower, dressing and teasing each other—sometimes leaving late for work because they couldn’t resist falling back into each other’s arms. Blue had taken to coming by the shop every afternoon, bringing her lunch or coffee, or just coming by to check on her. She loved that he made the time to do that, but then again, that was Blue. He gave and gave and gave. He even offered to work with Duke to see if they could drum up interest with another prospective buyer for the business, but Lizzie had had enough. She didn’t want to hope to find a way out from under the webcast anymore. It was easier to accept her fate and move forward, even if it was taking her a little longer to accept it than she’d hoped.
The only dark cloud in her life was her relationship with her stubborn father. She’d called him several times, and still he wouldn’t come to the phone. She’d even taken an hour off yesterday and stopped by the inn, hoping to speak with him, but he’d refused to see her. Her mother had said he was meeting with someone, which she assumed was an excuse. How was she supposed to handle the fact that her mother was covering for him?
She was sure that asking her mother to tell her father that she was about ready to give up trying hadn’t been the best way to handle it, but she’d been at such a loss, had felt so devastated by his refusal to see her, that she was at her wit’s end with the whole situation. There was only so much denial a person could take before they broke down or walked away. And there was no way she was letting his conservative views mess up things for Maddy or for her. She had an incredible man who adored her and friends and family—aside from her father—who accepted and supported her. This was his loss.
If only it didn’t hurt so bad.
It was true what people said about going through difficult times together and how struggles could bring people closer together. For her and Blue, that was definitely true. She’d never felt so loved, cherished, or supported.
It was Thursday night. She’d texted Blue earlier to tell him that she was taking the flowers to the cemetery and then she’d meet him at home. She packed up the flowers and walked out to her car thinking about the show she had to tape tonight. Maybe she’d go a little crazy and make a cake shaped like butt cheeks. Her mind shifted back to Blue—he was never far from it. She shivered with memories of crossing off the mile-high club from her Naughty-Places list on the way back from New York. She’d never imagined the bathrooms on airplanes were so small, but that had made it all the more fun when they’d snuck in together.
She smiled to herself as she unlocked her car door. It was a good thing her father didn’t know about her lists. That might just push him to an early grave.
“Peanut?”
Lizzie froze. Tears sprang to her eyes at the sound of her father’s voice and the endearment she hadn’t heard in a decade. She gripped the car door for stability as she turned to face him in the hazy darkness of the evening. His eyes were sad, his shoulders drooped in a way she’d never witnessed, jumbling the powerful image of her father she carried with her.
Blood rushed to her ears. She’d seen him angry, happy, and nonplussed, but the remorse riding his deep-set eyes and draining the strength from his shoulders was so shockingly unfamiliar, it momentarily numbed her.
“Dad?” she finally managed.
He stepped closer, and when he spoke, his tone was tender and forgiving.
“When you were a little girl, you told me that I was cockeyed. I wasn’t sure what you meant, and when you tried to explain it, the best you could come up with was that I saw things crooked.” His lips curved up with a tentative smile.
She couldn’t remember saying that to him, but it didn’t surprise her. It must have been before she’d learned to hold her tongue.
“My whole life I’ve stood strong in my convictions about morals and ethics and the way we should live our lives,” he said without even a hint of his typical confidence.
“I know, and I’m sorry I’ve let you down.” She felt her heart tearing in half, wanting to please him and not wanting to back down at the same time. “But I’m not going to change what I’m doing. Not even for you.”
He nodded, his face solemn. “I know that. Elizabeth, it seems I’ve misjudged you, and it took someone other than my own family to show me how badly I had.”
“What do you mean?” Other than family?
“Do you know why I couldn’t meet with you when you came by the inn yesterday?”
Because you didn’t want to. She couldn’t bring herself to respond.
“I’ve had a visitor every day this week. Someone who obviously cares for you a great deal, someone who wanted me to fully understand the daughter I raised.” Her father dropped his eyes again. “I’m ashamed to admit that it took another man to make me see exactly how crooked my views were. A man who refused to take no for an answer. A man who came to the inn nearly every day and sat in the parlor until I finally really heard what he had to say.”
Tears sprang to her eyes. Blue. She tightened her grip on the cold metal door.
“He forced me to listen, Lizzie, and not even your own mother could do that. Your mother hasn’t spoken more than two words to me since this mess began other than to tell me that I’m a stubborn old fool.” He smiled at that. “She’s right, and I’m not proud of it.”
“Dad, don’t let anyone force you to accept who I am.” She was trembling, and it took all of her determination to drag the words from her lungs.
“Blue didn’t force anything…but the truth. He told me about the things you did for others, and he told me about how hard you worked day in and day out. And he pointed out one very important thing that I somehow managed to miss.” He held her gaze then, and it made her heart ache even more. “He pointed out that it shouldn’t matter if you’re the Naked Baker or not, which, Elizabeth, I’m ashamed to say that you, too, pointed out to me. I think you might have cracked my hard head, and he simply drove the point home.”
“But it does matter. That’s why you’re so mad, and honestly, Dad, I’m ashamed of doing it, too. That’s a big part of why I didn’t tell you.”
“You’re probably ashamed because of my beliefs, honey, but your boyfriend was right. It shouldn’t matter. When you love a person, you love who they are on the inside, and you have to trust that the decisions they’re making are the best ones for them. He made me see that my turning you away for doing this webcast was the same as if you’d turned me away for not having the same beliefs as you. But you didn’t throw our relationship away, peanut. You kept coming back. I was the idiot. I was the one who messed up.”
Lizzie wiped tears from her cheeks. “So, you’re not mad?”
“Mad? No. A little embarrassed that I couldn’t provide for my daughters and monumentally ashamed of myself for how I’ve treated you, but now that I see things more clearly, I’m proud that you could do what I was unable to. I was wrong to say you weren’t the daughter I raised. You’re a hundred times stronger than the person I thought I raised, because you stand true to your convictions even at the cost of losing others—and you did it not just for yourself but for your younger sister. That, Elizabeth, makes you a stronger person than anyone I have ever known. I was just too wrapped up in my own beliefs to see it.”
Lizzie could barely push air through her throat. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she forced her voice to work. “Thank you, Daddy.”
“Don’t thank me. I’m an old fool, and it took me way too long to come around. Thank that boyfriend of yours, who I didn’t even know existed until he showed up at the inn. I’m sure that’s another one of my failings. If you feel like you can’t tell me things, well, I’ll work on that, too, peanut. I only hope that it’s not too late for you to forgive me.”
He opened his arms and she walked right in.
“I forgive you.”
“That boyfriend of yours…”
“Blue, Daddy. His name is Blue.” And I love him so much. She didn’t want to keep silent anymore about anything. She’d seen what hurt that could cause. “I love him, Dad. I love him so much.”
“I saw it in your eyes, baby girl. But I have to ask, what kind of a name is Blue?”
“Dad!” She tried to pull out of his arms, and he held her too tightly for her to escape.
“I’m kidding.” His laughter stitched up the tear in her heart. “He…Blue told me how hard of a time he had with your videos, too, and how his love for you gave him the strength to overcome his own insecurities. It takes a strong man to admit his weaknesses.”
“You’re seeing crooked again, Dad. Those are his strengths.”