When Riley told me she was dating Jensen, I couldn't quite believe it.
"He's your client?" I’d asked her, trying to hold back my surprise.
While working at her previous firm, Riley had volunteered to represent former military personnel pro bono. Some of them were accused of crimes. Including Jensen.
"He was my client," she says. "Now he's... not. And I don't even know that we're dating anymore. Or that we ever were. It's all so confusing."
"But he's... like... a criminal," I'd said, flabbergasted.
I don't think the men I'd dated had gotten so much as a parking ticket.
"He's accused of a crime," she'd said defensively. "Which, as you know as well as I do, and more than anyone else in professions other than ours should know, doesn't mean he's guilty of it."
"Well, yeah," I'd said, feeling bad for my harsh judgment, but no less confused about what she saw in him. I’d also been shocked at her defensive tone. "But, you know what I meant."
"Honestly, I couldn't believe it myself at first," she'd told me. "But something just clicks between us. Something I never thought I would feel."
It turned out that Riley's feelings for Jensen didn't go away. They just continued to grow. I’d first met him when I was in town for their engagement party and I still couldn't believe she was with him.
I mean, he was attractive. That much was clear. Attractive was an understatement. He was a beefcake with a model's face. But Riley had never been one to fall for a guy based on his looks alone.
And this guy— Jensen— was just from a completely different world than we were. His whole job was to go to war, or train other people to go to war. He was an ex military guy through and through. An ex Navy SEAL, no less.
He was even in a motorcycle gang, for goodness' sake. Or, at least, he was in the process of joining one when he and Riley first got together— a “prospect,” I believe they’d called the term, of the Desert Dogs club— and now I'm pretty sure he's a full-fledged member.
And then there was Riley, working at a swanky, successful law firm, never having had a rough edge to her at any point in her life. I couldn't figure it out.
But something happened. She changed for the better. I didn't think she had needed to, but I had to admit that she had. And I also had to admit that a big part of that change came from her relationship with Jensen.
She left that law firm, which she said was engaging in unethical business practices, and began working for that nonprofit organization representing other veterans like Jensen. She seemed happier, more carefree. And absolutely in love with Jensen.
I had no choice but to approve wholeheartedly of their union. And then when Drew came along, it seemed there had been an even bigger purpose to their meeting.
Because that kid is just so cute and so smart and so good— despite the way he's been scowling at Caleb all night, which is understandable since Caleb hasn’t been wanting to share his toys with him— that there could be no other parents meant to be his parents in the entire world, except for Riley and Jensen.
"I was just telling Brynn that I look ridiculous dressed as a loofah," Riley says now.
"You're the sexiest ridiculous loofah I've ever seen," Jensen says. "Hold on, let me put on my part of our joint costume."
He reaches over to the hallway closet and pulls out a cardboard box that's been painted white and has the word "Dove" written on it, to make it look just like a bar of soap. He puts it over his head as both Caleb and Drew laugh.
"Now I match my beautiful loofah here,” he says, putting his arm around Riley as best as can in his costume.
I laugh along with the boys. It is pretty funny that Jensen is dressed as a bar of soap. Obviously he's a softie underneath his tough exterior, and Riley has transformed him from a hardened SEAL and motorcycle club member to a loving and even slightly goofy husband and father who insists on wearing crazy couples' costumes on Halloween.
I'm glad that Riley found her happy ending even though it had turned out to be hiding where I, and even she, had least expected it to be. And I'm happy that she and Jensen are still so gaga over each other. They're what every married person— and co-parent— aspires to be.
But seeing them like this reminds me of what I don't have. And what Caleb doesn't have.
I have to pay close attention to applying my eyeliner, so that I don't screw it up. And so that I don't dwell too much on what my friend has and I don't. The last thing I want to be is jealous tonight, or sad for that matter. I just want to go out and have a nice time with my best friend and her husband.
"Mmm mmm mmm," I hear Jensen say from the foyer, with exaggerated cheesiness.
I peer past the bathroom door to see him fake smothering Riley and Drew with kisses.
"I just couldn't wait to get home and kiss my wife and son. Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm."
"Ewww gross," I tell them, playfully. "Keep your family- sized displays of public affection to yourself."
I turn back to the mirror to begin applying mascara, even though I can never do it right. My eyelashes always end up looking like huge, ugly spiders. But I guess that's fitting tonight, since it’s Halloween.
"Don't feel left out," Jensen tells me. "Because I wasn't about to let you be the fifth wheel tonight. I have a little surprise for you."
"What?" I ask, as I squint at myself in the mirror, trying to determine if the eyelashes- turned- spider legs above my right eye, to which I'd just applied the mascara, are too long. I've taken off my glasses to be able to apply the makeup, and I haven't put my contacts in yet, so I can't easily tell.
"Geez, Jensen," Riley says, and I can tell she's slapping him playfully on the arm, even though I can't see it. "You were supposed to be a little subtler."
"Make what a little subtler?" he asks, feigning innocence.
I have a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach about whatever it is they're talking about. It's almost as bad as when I was watching the news about the clowns. But not quite. Because that feeling was the worst one I’ve had in a long time.
Suddenly, I hear the screen door swing open yet again and then Caleb says, "Mo-to-cycle man."
I'm going to kill Riley if she's trying to set me up with someone from Jensen's motorcycle club. She totally knows that's not my type of guy. And just because she was pleasantly surprised by Jensen doesn't mean I'll feel the same about whatever random biker she’s wanting to try to hook me up with.
I turn around to look, trying to control my annoyance and even anger at Riley for being part of this plan— whatever it is— without at least warning me beforehand that something was up.
"Hey there," says a man dressed in jeans and a motorcycle jacket, looking strangely out of place compared to the costumes that Riley, Jensen and I are wearing.
I think he's nodding at them, or me, but I can't really tell without my glasses or contacts on. From what I can tell though, he's the hottest guy I've ever seen.
"Brynn, come out here and meet my friend," Jensen says. "Don't be rude."
"Honey!" Riley protests, but then laughs. "She's just a little shy..."
It's not that, I want to tell her. I just happen to have only one eyelash covered in spider- lash mascara.
And I don't want to be set up with anyone in a motorcycle club. Especially someone who's not even wearing a costume for a costume party, I think, as I put my glasses on.
But I forget that thought almost as soon as I think it. Because now I can clearly see what I'd already thought was true. This "motorcycle man" is the hottest guy I've ever seen.