“It feels weird to be back here,” I declare gruffly while darting my eyes around the bar. “It’s been, what, six months? I should be used to it since I have to keep coming here to visit you, but I’m not really.”

“Yeah, you aren’t here enough.” Jayden pats me on the back. “Busy with work, I suppose.”

It still feels weird that we started our journey into the armed forces together, just to end up going in completely separate directions. Not that Jayden wanted it to, an injury forced him into a desk job.

“Well.” I raise my pint glass. “I’m here for all the big events, aren’t I? That time you were nearly shot dead, the day you got married, and now I’m here to celebrate you about to have a baby soon.”

“Well, not soon. There’s still a while to go yet but the sentiment is awesome.”

I look at my best friend, noticing the shining love behind his eyes. He really has been a different man since getting it together with Savannah. I tried to warn him against love since I had my heart shattered when my ex-fiancée cheated on me, but it’s actually done him well. I want to open myself up to the possibility myself, but it still freaks me out. The idea of giving myself wholly to someone again is a little bit too much.

“So, how is Savannah with the pregnancy? She doing well?”

“Oh yeah, really good actually. She’s really glowing with it. She looks fantastic. Peter is excited to have a baby brother or sister as well.”

I itch to ask about Savannah’s best friend, the one woman I’ve shared a genuine true amount of chemistry with, but I can’t. We never told anyone and in the last two years since I skipped out on her once the court case was done, we haven’t talked about it either. I suppose it would be weird to bring it up now.

I’m afraid if I ever allow myself to talk about Pippa I just won’t stop and that’s no good.

“Oh right, sure.” I take a big swig of the drink. “I’m sure you’re both really happy about it.”

“So, how have things been with you on that front? Found anyone yet, or still playing the field?”

Both, I want to answer since that would be the truth. I’ve been sleeping around to try and find anything like the connection I shared with Pippa. Just to prove to myself that it wasn’t individual to her and it doesn’t mean anything, but I can’t. It’s all just been a lot of empty and meaningless sex. Nothing has inspired me, sparked that desire in me, or truly turned me on. I don’t know why I can’t seem to escape her.

“Oh, you know me,” I answer blandly while refusing to meet Jayden’s eyes. “I never change.”

I half expect him to challenge me on that since I once told him that I’d try to open myself up more, but thankfully he doesn’t. He must be able to somehow sense that this isn’t easy for me.

“Well, good. We wouldn’t want you to change now, would we Tommy…?”

I tune him out as my eyes capture a vision that must be in my imagination it’s so wonderful. It’s the stunning sleek black hair and pale face of the woman who’s been in my mind for ages now. The vision of beauty that always enters my fantasies, when I’m alone and sometimes when I’m with other people. It obviously cannot be real because what are the chances of both me and Pippa being in The Stag tonight, but it feels real.

I shudder, remember the feel of her hungry lips dragging up and down my cock, her fingers piercing my skin as her faced pinched in pleasure, the feel of her walls clamping around me as she came…

Oh fuck!

The woman turns and flips her hair over her shoulder showing me a neck that I’ve definitely had my mouth all over before. It’s her, it really is. Despite the odds being stacked against us fate has us in the same place at the same time. It feels impossible, yet it’s actually happening. I don’t know what to do with myself.

My heart thunders against my sternum, my throat runs dryer than it’s ever been before, I even get fucking butterflies swirling around in the pit of my stomach. It’s ridiculous.

She has the sexiest looking red swing dress ever known to a man. It clings to her curves, flies out at her hips and skims her knees, I can see a hint of cleavage. I just want to keep looking at her.

“Are you okay?” Jayden suddenly grabs my attention back to him. “You look lost.”

This would be the moment to tell him that I’ve just spotted Pippa. We’re all friends and it would be weird for me not to, but for some reason I don’t. I keep her presence a secret just for me.

“Oh yeah, sorry. Just tired.” I rub my eyes to highlight my point. “Lot of travelling today.”

“Well, we don’t have to make it a late one anyway. You’re here for a few days, right?”

“Yeah, I’m not headed back until after next weekend, so I suppose we have plenty of time.”

“Good.” Jayden clinks his glass against mine and grins. “It’s good to have you around anyway. I know it can’t be that way at the moment, but I would love to see more of you. I miss you, buddy.”

“I’ll make an effort, I promise you. I’ll try and be about more.”

We smile at one another sharing all the past that we’ve had together. It’s been a wild ride for a lot of it, but we’ve managed to come out of it still just as good friends as we were beforehand.

“Oh, hold on.” He tugs his cell phone out of his pocket.” Savannah is calling me. I better just head outside to hear her. It’s so loud in here. You don’t mind it, do you?”

He gives me such a guilty look that I can’t help laughing. “Dude, I can cope by myself for a moment.”

I watch him leave through the front door of the bar and my eyes are immediately drawn back to Pippa. She’s got a magnet within her and I can’t resist her pull. She isn’t looking at me, she’s laughing at something the guy next to her is saying and my hand immediately clutches around my glass in anger. It’s misplaced, this woman isn’t mine, I can’t exactly hold any claim on her since we slept together a couple years ago and I’m the one who walked out, but I feel that deep claim in my chest that she belongs to me. Like she’s always been mine.

Turn away, I warn myself. Jayden will be back in a moment so just stop looking.

But my body doesn’t listen to my brain. Instead I hop on to my feet and I find myself marching towards her as if this is exactly what I planned to do. My heart and head are in a battle, and my brain definitely isn’t winning out.

“Tommy,” Pippa gasps in surprise as she senses me closing in on her. Her eyes widen in surprise and I can almost see her gulping down a thick ball of emotion. “What are you doing here?”

We’ve been in the same room before, many a time since we slept together, but this feels so damn different. There’s a thickness to the air and I’m pretty sure it’s being created by me. I don’t know what I’m doing.

Without even answering her, I take her hand in mine and I tug her with me into a dark corner. She falls willingly and the moment I press her up against the wall I can see her breasts rising and falling with her deep breaths. She doesn’t ask me what the hell all of this is about, but I can see the question there behind her eyes. I wouldn’t be able to answer her even if she asked me, I honestly have no idea.

I cup my hand around her cheek, my heart darting with emotion. The thick sizzling burning chemistry pulls me back towards her, even though I know it’s wrong. I shouldn’t go anywhere near Pippa unless I’m going to make her mind, she isn’t the sort of woman to fuck around with, but I can’t seem to help myself.

“Tommy, we…” Pippa starts, but the complaint falls apart on her lips. She caves, molding her body into me ever so slightly and I feel a deep stirring within me. I’ve missed this feeling, I haven’t had it for two long years and it’s phenomenal. It makes me question what my reasons have been for keeping away.

I lean in, shutting my brain off completely, and I crash my lips against hers. I’m filled with that deep, beautiful set of fireworks exploding in my stomach as we kiss. It’s wrong, but it feels oh so right.