Cole and I had spent more time together before he left to go back home, but he made sure that we exchanged every form of contact possible. He texted me all the time and at first it was weird. But it didn’t take long for me to get use to his good morning and good night text messages and everything else in between.
We were more than halfway through the new school year, and I couldn’t believe how fast summer approached. It felt like I could blink and it would be here. Though being in high school with my boys had been the same, but different. Something changed when they saw me with Cole, in some ways it was a blessing in disguise, in other ways it was a disaster waiting to happen, but that only related to Lucas.
The boys were still overprotective, but it lessened with time. They no longer threatened boys not to mess with me or talk to me. They didn’t even flip out when I talked to a boy anymore. They seemed at ease with the fact that I grew up and could make my own decisions based on what I felt was right for me. I expected it had something to do with Cole coming into my life, and I appreciated that the most.
Lucas, well Lucas and I, we changed again. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine our relationship where it currently was. After that night at our abandoned house, he started to pull away from me. He hung out with Stacey more. In fact, he hung out with a lot of girls more. The rumor around school was that he made his way through the entire cheerleading squad and then some. It was so hard to ignore it when it was blatantly flaunted in my face daily. He turned seventeen and I turned fifteen, and we were drifting away from each other in ways I wasn’t expecting or prepared for.
The boys noticed it, too, but they never said anything.
At least not to me.
We hadn’t been to our abandoned house since that night. I went back a few times after work and other normal times, with the hope he’d be there waiting for me. He wasn’t. Not once. I finally gave up and stopped going.
It was easier that way.
In some ways, Cole replaced Lucas in my life. We were becoming close. We talked about anything and everything. Cole was sweet and understanding. He made me laugh with his relentless flirting, which I grew to love. It became a nice distraction from missing Bo. I liked that someone doted on me in ways Lucas never had. In the back of my mind, I wondered why. Girls like that kind of stuff, and I was no exception to the rule. Cole and I were just friends, even though he said he wanted more. I didn’t want a long-distance relationship, and I knew he didn’t either, regardless of what he said.
“You okay?” Aubrey asked as I watched Lucas cage in some random girl with his built frame, on what I assumed was her locker.
My boy grew up, too. He was broader, taller, and more masculine. He had this certain swagger about him that made the girls at school throw themselves at him. It wasn’t anything new, but for the first time he jumped on them, literally. It wasn’t just Stacey anymore.
I hugged my notebooks closer to my chest in a comforting gesture. “Yeah.”
“He’s a guy, Alex, he’s just being a guy.”
I glanced over at her, surprised. “What?”
She reassuringly smiled. “I know, Alex. I’ve known for a long time.”
My eyebrows lowered in confusion. “You have?” I softly spoke, not believing what she shared.
“Of course, it’s hard to miss. The only reason the boys miss it is because they choose to. They ignore what is blatantly in their faces. You guys aren’t smooth about it. You never have been.”
I jerked back, stunned and relieved at the same time. Why was I relieved?
“I still don’t know what actually went down between you guys, but it’s obvious it was bad. You barely talk to each other, and when you do neither of you makes eye contact. It would take an idiot not to notice.”
“Yeah,” I muttered, taking a deep breath and contemplating whether I could be honest with her or not. “I wish I could tell you what happened between us, Aubrey, but I don’t have a clue.” I decided I could and by the look on her face, she wasn’t one bit surprised.
“Everything just became complicated. It started before Cole, and then he just broke the camel’s back. He’s always been possessive of me. All the boys have.”
She nodded in agreement.
“It’s different with Cole. I don’t know why, but it is. We’re just friends and he couldn’t handle it. He told me I had to choose, but I didn’t understand what I was choosing. He didn’t promise me anything. If he would have told me that we were going to be together then maybe that would have changed things, but I still don’t think so. I hate the fact that he was bossing me around. Especially since I’ve never done that to him. I’ve let him do anything he’s wanted, even with me…”
She sighed, bracing herself. “Did you?”
“No. We’ve only kissed.”
“Phew,” she breathed out. “That would have been—”
“I know,” I interrupted, and I did.
“This thing between us has been going on since we were kids, and then it turned into something neither one of us understood like it became bigger than us. Does that make any sense? Because I don’t understand it.”
She smiled, support evident in her eyes. “You love each other, that much I do know.”
“I thought love was supposed to be easy? It’s not easy, not even a little. I mean you and Dylan make it look so simple.”
She laughed, shaking her head. “Trust me, Alex, nothing is easy about our relationship. You know how Dylan is. Fuck, you probably know him better than I do. He’s an asshole.”
I laughed with her.
“But he’s my asshole,” she added.
My hand clutched my shark-tooth necklace as her words settled in. A sense of longing fell over me.
“Give it time. I know that the boys have a lot to do with him and your guys, whatever. They don’t like it, and I know they’ve given him shit about it. Plus,” she emphasized, “you talk to Cole constantly, and that boy is gorgeous.”
I grinned. “He’s alright. Don’t tell him that, he’ll get a bigger head than he already has.”
“Are you excited to see him again?”
“I am. He’s been a great friend.”
“Not anything more?” she asked with a mischievous smirk.
I rolled my eyes. “No, we’re just friends.”
“Hmm…”
“What?”
She shrugged. “Nothin’.”
“Doesn’t sound like nothin’.”
“I know that Lucas is doing what he wants, and I think that you should, too. That’s all.” She knowingly shrugged again.
“What makes you think I’m not?”
“Alex…”
With wide eyes, I nodded. “I am.”
“If you say so.”
“I am, Aubrey,” I argued.
She put her hands up in the air in a surrendering gesture. “Listen, just know that I’m always here for you. I don’t care what it’s about. I’m not going to judge you, and I’m not going to tell Dylan or the boys either. I promise.” She stuck out her pinky and I smiled, locking my own around it.
“Thank you, Aubrey. You have no idea how much I needed that. I haven’t been able to talk to anyone about this.”
“Not even Cole?”
“Not really, but I think he knows.”
“Yeah the only ones that don’t seem to know are your good ol’ boys.”
I sighed as we both looked over at Lucas, who was now sucking face with the same girl.
“Ugh! He’s an asshole,” she breathed out.
“Legit.”
She linked her arm with mine, turning us around to walk toward the doors to leave. “Come on, no need to watch the shit show that he so desperately wants you to see,” she dramatically stated.
“You think?”
She shook her head and glanced over at me. “No, doll, I know. You have so much to learn about boys, Alex, so much,” she exasperated.
Maybe she was right.
And it only added to the sting I felt in my heart.
I knew she watched from afar. She was always watching from afar. It made it easier for me to behave the way I was. Bad. It was a mixture of being torn, confused, angry, and just plain hatred. Not toward Alex but for the situation at hand.
No, I’m lying.
I fucking hated Cole.
Maybe a part of it was also spite and heartbreak. Things were never the same after we left our abandoned house.
I was over the games.
I was over the bullshit.
I was over the back and forth mess between us.
I needed to feel in control again, so I did the only thing that I could. I pulled away from her. It made things simpler that way. I didn’t have to watch her and Cole become closer, but looking away sure as shit didn’t take away the pain it caused me. I despised him. I loathed him now more than ever. He took her away from me, and I never thought that would happen. The boys never called me out on the fact that I went from just having sex with Stacey to sleeping with any girl that would open her legs to me.
And trust me they did.
It took away the emptiness I felt in my heart. The space that seemed hollow without her.
“You smell nice,” I murmured to the side of Celeste’s neck with my lips.
She giggled. They always giggled. High school gossip ran rapidly and my reputation grew overnight. I never felt bad about what I did. They knew what I wanted and pretty much threw themselves at me. I didn’t do relationships, they knew that too.
“What are you doing tonight?” I asked, trailing soft kisses down the spot under her ear.
She shivered. “Anything you want.”
I smiled against her skin. “Good, I want you.” I pulled back and brought my mouth up to meet hers. She tasted like cherry lip-gloss, which immediately made me think of Alex. I couldn’t get away from her and a huge part of me didn’t want to. The bulge forming in my pants was from the taste of the lip-gloss, not this girl.
It was Friday and the end of the day, teachers wanted to get the fuck out of here faster than the students. Or else I may have gotten in trouble for sucking on her tongue on school property, which happened before.
A lot.
“Come on,” I whispered into her mouth, grabbing her hand and tugging her with me.
I caught Alex and Aubrey walking side-by-side a few feet in front of us, and I would be lying if I said it didn’t kill me to not be the one walking by her instead of Aubrey.
But that was another time.
We weren’t there anymore.
I walked faster and with purpose, and I felt Alex’s eyes burning a hole in my back as we made it out to my truck. Celeste jumped in, and I followed suit. I tried not to acknowledge the sad look on Alex’s face as we drove away.
We went back to her house and got right down to business once we entered her bedroom. Good thing her parents weren’t home. I kicked the door closed with my foot as I took her in my arms. Laying my body on top of hers, we started to make out on her bed. Which quickly led to her only wearing her bra and panties and me with no shirt.
I cupped her breast through the lace material and she moaned in my mouth, beckoning me to linger.
“Is this okay?” I groaned, asking her anyways. I wasn’t a total asshole.
“Yes…”
Her bra came off, and I softly made my way down to her breast, licking her nipple before sucking it into my mouth, making her back arch off the bed.
My assault continued toward the edge of her panties. “What about this?” I rasped, peering up at her, faintly blowing on her other nipple.
She nodded, not being able to form words while she licked her lips from the delicious torment I incited through the lace of her panties. I pushed aside the silky fabric, touching the moisture that pooled in between her folds.
“You’re so fucking wet,” I breathed out, repositioning my body on top of hers and shoving my tongue into her awaiting mouth.
“Play with me,” she encouraged against my lips, and I did just that.
I stimulated her clit with the palm of my hand, getting her ready before I pushed my index and middle fingers into her tight heat, fighting the urge to not give her the shocker.
“That feel good?”
“Yes,” she purred.
I finger fucked her until she shuddered beneath me, closer and closer to the brink of climax that I delivered.
“Do you have a condom?” she huskily whispered. Her head rolled back while her hips rocked back and forth fucking my fingers.
I didn’t have to be asked twice.
She came hard and fast, exactly how I craved. I sheathed myself, not bothering to completely take off my jeans. I flipped us over so that she was now on top ready to ride me. She effortlessly slid herself down my shaft.
“Fuck,” I growled, big and throaty, gripping onto her hips and gliding her the way I wanted.
She placed her hands on my chest, and I loved feeling the weight of her against my ribs. It made it much easier for her to ride my cock.
“Fuck, that feels good,” I groaned, making her smile. She bit her lower lip, and I shut my eyes. It didn’t take long for me to picture someone else.
I don’t have to tell you who that was.
There were times when this happened. As always, it was replaced with images of her with someone else, someone that wasn’t me. The thought was always too much to bear. It released a primal urge to literally want to fuck her out of my system, and heart. I immediately opened my eyes and peered back to the reality playing out before me. It was simpler.
“Where did you go?”
I shook it off and flipped her over to thrust her harder and with more determination.
“Don’t worry about it, baby.”
I kissed her just to feel anything other than what was going through me. Angling her leg higher I tried to hit the sweet spot against the head of my dick. It always made them come, taking me right with them. She shivered and pulsated, as her pussy gripped my dick like a goddamn glove, I thrust in her a few more times. We simultaneously found our release together, falling right on top of her. With my body sweating and my balls empty, I decided to spend the rest of the afternoon.
Wrapped inside her pussy.