I looked out over the rail at the water slopping against the side of the bridge. Jade had convinced me that I needed closure, and I knew she was right. I brought a box of memories with me. I’d planned to toss them over the edge, but at the last moment I couldn’t.

Jade and I had grown closer in the months since Dylan’s death, but it was as friends. Jade had insisted on it. At first I’d argued, terrified that it was her way of politely leaving me, but eventually I understood. I needed to heal before I could begin to face the challenges of building a real relationship with her.

Neither of us dated anyone else, and she let me take her to her sorority date party. I’d already promised myself she’d never go to one alone again, but our time together was platonic, and as much as I wanted her, I resisted. They were the longest two months of my life.

“Here, toss this instead.” She put one of the flowers she’d brought into my hand. “It will feel good.” Like the return to friendship idea, the road trip had been her idea as well. I’d learned to stop questioning Jade. She was full of good ideas, especially when it came to me.

I tossed the yellow orchid in and watched as it slowly drifted down. The water accepted the offering, and the orchid drifted out to sea. I took another flower. And another, until they were all gone.

We stood there watching the yellow and purple flowers floating away. Despite the flowers, the waves hadn’t changed at all. Nothing had. It all looked exactly the same. Just like there was no evidence of the way Dylan’s car had careened into the water at the exact spot two months before.

Jade squeezed my hand, and I squeezed back. Despite all the hell of the past months, she was still there with me. No matter how hard I’d pushed her away she came right back.

---

“I’ve missed you so much.” She ran her hands down my chest in the same way she always had before. It felt good through my shirt, but I knew how good it felt when there was no cotton separating her soft fingers from my skin. We’d just arrived back on campus, and without either of us discussing it, I knew it was time.

“I’ve missed you too.” I rubbed her back, marveling as always that she gave me the time of day. I knew I wasn’t the easiest guy to deal with, but it never seemed to deter her. I swore up and down that I’d make it all up to her. I’d be exactly the man she needed in her life. But for now all I could do was live in the moment, and enjoy the look of complete love on her face.

“Don’t leave me again. I can’t lose you.” Her words were whispered as her lips brushed against my ear. She wasn’t talking about us breaking up, she was talking about the way I’d shut her out. I’d hurt her more than I’d realized at the time.

“You never really lost me.” I took her hand in my own. “I only lost myself.”

“I lost you.” Tears spilled down her unbelievably beautiful face.

I wiped away a few tears. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for hurting you.”

“You only did it because you were hurting.”

“That doesn’t excuse it.”

“No, but it changes things.” She blinked a few times, offsetting a few tears that had settled on her eyelashes.

“Why did you wait for me? Why are you still here when I pushed you away?”

“Because love does messed up things to you.”

“It does…” I pulled her closer. I needed to feel her heartbeat.

“I never wanted to love you.”

“I did. That’s all I wanted from you. Your love, and your heart.”

“And it’s yours.” Her tears continued to pour from her eyes, and I knew wiping them away wasn’t enough. I left gentle kisses across her cheeks, trying to replace each tear with my lips.

“How in the world did I ever get so lucky?”

“You can’t mean that. With everything you’ve been through, you can’t actually feel lucky just because I’m here.”

“That’s exactly how I feel.” I brushed my lips against hers. They were as soft and sweet as always. “You’ve brought more happiness to my life than you’ll ever know.” I returned my lips to hers, and we moved them together gently. But that didn’t last. It couldn’t. We both sped up the pace, and she parted her lips to let me inside. I let my tongue enjoy coming home, as I slipped my hand under the bottom of her dress. I needed to feel her skin. I needed to feel her.

She slipped her hand under my shirt, running her hand up and down my body in the teasing way she’d done the very first night at the lake.

She broke the kiss. “I need you, Kyle.”

“I need you too. I always need you.”

“Show me.”

I didn’t waste a moment. I slipped off her dress, taking in a breath as her bare breasts came into view. She pulled off my shirt slowly, before moving on to my pants and boxers. I gently laid her back down and pulled off her panties. I held back and just watched her. I watched the beautiful woman who I’d come so close to losing because I couldn’t stand the thought of loving anyone. “You are too beautiful for words.”

“Thank you.” She locked eyes with me, and she didn’t cover up.

I lowered my mouth to her breast while I cupped the other. I needed to explore every inch of her again as though it was the first time. In some ways it was. Neither of us were the same people we were that night at the lake, and neither of us were pretending that what we were about to share was anything short of everything.

She moaned beneath me, gently stroking me with her hand. I released her breast with my mouth and left kisses all the way down her body while I slipped my hand between her legs.

She opened up to me while locking her eyes with mine.

“I need you, Jade.” I moved above her, watching for the signal that she was as ready as I was.

“Show me you need me.”

I nodded before thrusting into her. I didn’t take it slow or gentle. I moved in and out quickly, needing the full length of myself inside her, needing to feel complete.

She wrapped her legs around me as she pulled my head down to meet hers. Her lips eagerly melded with mine. The combination of her lips on mine while I moved inside her was almost too much.

She moaned, her body heaving underneath me. I broke the kiss long enough to say the words I needed to say. “I love you, Jade.”

“I love you, Kyle.”

I reached my release and stayed inside her.

She looked up at me again with tears.

“Did I hurt you?” I wiped away her tears.

“These are happy tears. You have them too.”

I ran my hand over my cheek, she was right. At one time in my life that might have embarrassed me, but not now. Not when it was because I was finally reconnected with the girl I loved. I kissed her lightly. “You’ll stay tonight, won’t you?”

“I’ll stay any night you want me to.”

“Then stay every night.” I rolled next to her.

“I’d like that.” She rested her head on my chest. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

“There’s no one else I’d want to be with.” I ran my fingers through her tangled hair.

“It looks like we’ve moved passed friends again.”

“That we did.” I laced my fingers with hers. “I guess sleeping with a friend isn’t so bad.”

“I don’t want to go back to being just friends ever again.”

“We’re never going back there. We’re staying right here forever.” I put our hands right over my heart.

“I’d like that.”

“I’d love it.” I kissed the spot right over her heart.