Chapter 12 – Brad
I hated having to cancel on Carly. I wanted to see her again. I wanted to spend time with her. The night we’d had together had been the best night I’d had in a very long time. It felt like the way it used to be between us, but different. We had both grown up. We had direction now. We had lives of our own. Somehow, it had made everything that much better.
There was nothing more attractive than a woman that knew who she was.
But that had to be put on hold because the press had sniffed me out and had come to ruin my life.
Being famous had its downfalls, and I was used to them. The paparazzi were everywhere. Being a pro athlete wasn’t only about the game anymore. It was also about your fame and who you were in society now. Usually, I knew how to handle them. I knew that it was a part of my life, and it was something I had been willing to accept.
But being away on a break, back in my hometown with my mom, hadn’t prepared me for this. I hadn’t expected to need to put on a face and watch my back. Not out here in Laramie, not when I was supposed to have my time off.
They had written an article about me being in Laramie. Having a Sharks player in a place like Laramie, Wyoming had created a buzz that had gotten every news van and paper in the county to my front door.
They were parked on the road at my mom’s house, and I couldn’t stick my nose out of the door without being photographed. It was irritating. I had come here to relax, not to be put on parade.
“How am I going to go out now?” my mom asked, standing in front of the living room window, looking at the people that were camping out on the road. “What will they do?”
“They might take a few photos, Mom,” I said. “I don’t think they’ll do more than that. You’re the mom of a famous football player, and that gets you some attention, but they don’t really want you. They want me.”
My mom looked at me. “So, I can go out, and they’ll leave me alone?”
I didn’t know if they would, and I told her so. I didn’t think they would harass her, but the media had very little respect for privacy and a definition of harassment that no one else agreed with.
“I’ll see if I can handle it, okay? Just try to stay in today if you can help it.”
My mom turned her attention back to the road.
“Is it always like this?” she asked.
I nodded. “Yeah, I have a bodyguard with me usually. It’s something you budget for. I just didn’t realize I would need one in Laramie, or that the press would even know I was here. That was a big mistake on my part.”
My mom shook her head back and forth, still watching the commotion.
“I don’t know how you can live like this,” she said.
It had taken a little getting used to when I’d first started out as a professional player, but I had gotten used to it. Sometimes, it was a nuisance that I couldn’t go anywhere without a tail that had a story to write about me, but I loved my fame and the fans that followed me blindly. To some of them, I was a hero. It was just a game, football was just a sport, but I liked it that some people looked up to me and relied on me for a win or something spectacular.
My phone rang.
“I’m taking this in my room,” I said to my mom before I answered. I walked to my room.
“Hey, Kina,” I said.
Kina was Jacob’s wife. She had started out as Jacob’s PR manager before they had fallen for each other and gotten married, and even though she didn’t manage me full time, she kept an eye on me too and gave me some pointers.
“Jacob told me you’re having a bit of trouble,” she said.
“Yeah, the press found me out here, and now I’m stuck in my house with a bunch of crows outside my door.”
“What happened?” she asked.
“I think it’s one of the places I went out to the other night. The bar or the hotel I visited. The people around here are star struck, and I wouldn’t be surprised if they leaked to the press about me. That’s probably where it happened.”
“Right,” Kina said.
“What do I do now?” I asked. “I’m not in the mood for this shit. I came out here to relax, not to play these damn games with the press. I feel like I have to watch myself everywhere I go now.”
Kina sighed. “Unfortunately, that’s how it’s going to be if you’re planning on staying. You have to keep your nose completely clean while you’re out there. Like, I’m talking about being on your best behavior the entire time. So, no blackout drunk nights or fights or prostitutes.”
I groaned. “What a party,” I said. “There are no other options?”
“Getting back to Miami is an alternative,” she said. “If you leave now, get back to your own space, and have Jerry with you again, you can deal with it. But other than that, I’m afraid your hands are tied. It’s the downside of being famous, Brad.”
She was right. I would have to watch my back and behave instead of acting like I was on vacation. My break wasn’t going to be a complete break, and I had to accept that. Unless I was willing to go home, leave Laramie behind, and move forward. I could always spend the last of my days off at home, doing whatever I wanted there with my security intact.
“I’ll have to see what I’m going to do,” I said.
“Well, whatever it is, be safe,” Kina said.
I knew what she meant. She was talking about my image, and I understood why. It was so easy to mess up and so hard to get out of trouble again. Some players had had their contracts cancelled because of doing one wrong thing.
Going back home would probably be the right thing to do, but I didn’t want to leave. Not yet. Going back to Miami meant I wouldn’t be able to spend more time with Carly, and that was all I wanted. It would be one of the only reasons I stayed.
I didn’t want to leave until I understood what was happening between us. I needed to know how she felt about me, if there was anything we could work with. If she still had feelings for me, I needed to know. Because I had no idea where we stood. I didn’t know if she still had feelings for me or if this thing we were doing was just a fling. The problem was that I didn’t know what I felt for her, either. I wasn’t sure what I felt for her.
I felt something. That was for sure. But I didn’t know what it was. I was confused. I hated not knowing what was happening or where I stood with someone, and it irritated me that I didn’t know. When I decided on something or wanted something, I needed to move forward. And not knowing stopped me from doing that.
“I think I should stick it out here for a while,” I said to Kina. “I can’t let them rule my life.”
Of course, it wasn’t totally about that, but Kina didn’t have to know that.
“You’ll have to work hard to keep your image clean. Whoever you’re with might get dragged into this, too. Keep that in mind.”
It was sound advice and the last thing I wanted to hear.
“I’ll be careful,” I promised. “Things are going too well with my career for me to afford to mess it up now.”
“Good man,” Kina said. “That’s the spirit. But stick to it, okay? I’m keeping my eye on you.”
Kina was a good woman. Jacob was lucky to have her. It had to be amazing to be married to someone who could manage your image like that.
“I’ll see you at the charity event,” I said before hanging up.
I looked at the phone in my hand. Yes, I decided. I needed to stay. Whatever it was I found out, I needed to know. And I was sure I could keep things clean and simple while I was here, although being with Carly the other night had been anything but clean and simple. And maybe it was because of our escapades that I had the press on my doorstep right now.
Either way, I decided that it would be better to stay. All I had to do now was learn how to deal with the press. Maybe I had to look at getting a bodyguard here. I preferred Jerry, who knew what I liked and disliked and understood my routines, but I couldn’t have everything.
“Did you say you might be leaving?” my mom asked when I returned to the living room. She must have heard a bit of my conversation with Kina.
I shook my head. “I’m not going anywhere for the moment, Mom. I want to stay here as long as I can.”
My mom looked like she relaxed. She’d been worried I would leave. It was another reason for me to stay. I barely got to see my mom, and I wanted to spend more time with her.
“What are we going to do about all this?” she asked, gesturing toward the people outside.
“Let’s carry on with life as usual,” I said. “It’s a nuisance right now, but if they see there’s nothing to write about, they’ll leave us alone.”
My mom looked skeptical, and she was right to be. But I’d found that the media was like a child having a temper tantrum. As soon as they realized it wasn’t working, they gave up.
I had to make another call and found Carly’s number on my contacts list. I pressed the phone against my ear and waited for it to ring. When it started ringing, I counted the rings. It rang longer and longer until I reached her voice mailbox.
Why wasn’t she answering? I glanced toward the neighbor’s house. Was she avoiding me? I didn’t try to call again—I wasn’t going to come across as desperate. Instead, I texted her.
I’m so sorry I had to ditch you last night. Do over, soon?
I read the text three times before sending it, contemplating if I should change it. Finally, I hit send.
I waited for a reply. I held the phone in my hand so that I would know the moment the reply came.
It didn’t come. There was silence. She hadn’t answered my call, and now she wasn’t responding to my text. Maybe I was expecting her to answer ridiculously fast, but I felt like she was avoiding me. Why the hell would she be avoiding me? I hadn’t done anything wrong. I had canceled on her for her own good.
“Whatever,” I said out loud, shaking my head. I didn’t care. Why should I? I wouldn’t care.
I walked to the kitchen to make myself lunch. I made a BLT sandwich and sat down in the living room to eat. I checked my phone again. There was still no reply.
Dammit, what the hell was I supposed to do now? I couldn’t even march next door because the press would be all over me like a cheap suit, and then I would have to explain why I wanted to see the girl next door. So, I would have to wait for her to text me or call me, and she wasn’t doing that.
I was getting angry. I liked getting what I wanted. I had money and I had fame, and I barely needed to wait in the real world. But this wasn’t the real world. This was Laramie, where I had started out as a nobody and where I could easily be a nobody again. At least, to the woman I was interested in.
I wanted to talk to her. I needed to discuss what had happened between us. That was fucking hard to do if she refused to answer my calls or my texts.
My sandwich tasted like cardboard when I bit into it. I chewed and swallowed and bit off another piece without thinking. Maybe I needed to give Carly and the press a day or two to calm down.
If I could hold out that long.