Chapter 21 – Chelsea
After I get home from class, I eat dinner alone in the dining room. I’d been hoping my dad might want to eat dinner too, as we sometimes do together, but so far he’s kept himself cooped up in his room.
I’m lonely though, and could use some conversation. I also want to let him know that I have plans on Sunday, since he’d mentioned perhaps taking me on a fishing trip. My birthday is coming up soon, and he likes to do father/ daughter weekends to celebrate.
I’m not sure what to tell him about who my plans are with, since I don’t like to lie to him. But I’m also not about to ruin what I have going with Wesley. Even if we just meet up in secret for some fun on the side, I’m still excited about being with him.
And Taylor’s right that my dad hides things from me, too. So I decide to say I’m going to the amusement park, which is true, but leave out who I’m going with. He’ll probably just assume it’s Taylor, since we often went together in the past.
I approach his bedroom door and knock on it.
“Umm, come in,” he says, and it isn’t until I’ve opened his door that I realize he sounds embarrassed and in a hurry.
He’s turning around and shoving something into his pocket. And it really looks like a little blue box. The kind that engagement rings come in.
“Dad?” I ask, feeling half guilty for barging in on him and half mad at him for clearly not wanting me to know something.
And I suppose that 100% of me feels scared about whatever is in that box.
“Hi Sweetie,” he says, taking his hands out of his pocket as if everything is completely normal. “What’s up?”
“Dad, what are you doing?”
I didn’t want to ask him, but I can’t help it. I feel like a little kid again. My lower lip is even trembling.
Stop it, I will myself.
“Chelsea,” he says, as he sits down on the bed. “You may want to sit down. I have something to tell you.”
Oh my god.
This is it. He’s going to tell me that Taylor’s mom is going to be my new step-mom…
I brace myself.
“I’m fine standing here, Dad.”
Just get it over with. Just tell me this crazy thing I never thought would happen. And especially not like this.
“Well, okay. If you’re sure. I know this is going to sound pretty surreal…”
“Dad, just tell me.”
I ball up my fists and scratch at my palms, a nervous habit leftover from when I was younger.
“Okay. Well.” He chuckles, awkwardly. “Taylor’s mom and I… Miss Hudson…”
“Sherry?” I ask, nonchalantly.
Don’t call her Miss Hudson. It makes her sound like an old librarian rather than Taylor’s mom, whom I’ve known ever since I can remember.
“Yes. Of course. Sherry. We’ve been… seeing each other.”
I let out a huge sigh of relief.
“Oh. I know that, Dad.”
“Really?”
He leans back a bit on the bed, as if relieved himself.
“Yes. Obviously. I know a lot more than you think I know.”
Why didn’t you tell me sooner? I want to ask him. Taylor’s mom told her. She tells her everything. Unlike you.
But I don’t say anything. I’m just glad it isn’t worse. Apparently he just got her a gift. I remind myself that it’s not unheard of for a guy to give a woman he’s seeing some jewelry.
“You’re smarter than I give you credit for,” my dad says, laughing nervously again.
“I mean, I was kind of surprised when Taylor and I first figured it out,” I admit. “But it’s a rather small city with a small selection of…”
I pause, not knowing how to say it.
“Attractive, older single people?” he jumps in, helping me out.
“Ha. Something like that,” I laugh, grateful that he’s not taking offense. “I should have figured that sooner or later you guys would make your rounds to each other, before you’re both onto the next flavor of the month, or whatever it is that you do, and she does.”
“She does?” he asks.
He blinks, as if he’s disappointed to hear this.
“Dad. Geez.”
I roll my eyes.
Guys. They’re so oblivious.
Even after years of dating a lot of women, my dad still thinks he’s the only one any of them have ever dated.
“Well, honey, this is a little different, I think, than…”
“Dad, gross.” All I can picture is my dad making out with Taylor’s mom. It’s not a pretty sight. “Keep your personal life private, will you?”
“Of course, Sweetheart. I didn’t mean to overshare. I was just…”
“I mean, I’m glad you told me, and I want to know what’s up,” I clarify, remembering how just a minute ago I was mad that he hadn’t let me in on this news sooner. “But no need to get into specifics.”
“Okay, honey. I’ll try my best to walk that fine line.”
I don’t need to know how you think Taylor’s mom is the hottest thing since sliced bread for a whole day or two, until the bread goes stale and you decide it’s time to buy some new fresh bread from the bakery.
It dawns on me that maybe my dad is the reason I’ve never been too interested in dating guys until I really liked one of them. I don’t see the point in having a merry go round of partners.
Sure, for my dad it makes sense because he’s grieving the loss of my mom and he needs some company. But for me, I’d rather just wait until I found that special someone.
Have I found him?
No, he’s just a secret side piece. That’s all we are to each other, mutually.
As if reading my mind, Dad asks, “So, what were you coming to tell me?”
“Oh yeah,” I say, my head still spinning from his revelation. “Just that I’m going to go to the amusement park this weekend, so it’s probably not the best time to go to the lake.”
“That’s okay,” Dad says, looking as if he’d forgotten the lake was even a possibility. I bet he already made plans with Taylor’s mom. “I mean, it’d be better to go to the lake closer to your birthday, or even on the weekend of your actual birthday, if you’d like. And it’s good that you and Taylor are reliving your youth.”
“What?” I ask him, confused.
“Oh, you know. Heading back to your old stomping grounds. The amusement park.”
“Oh. Yeah. Ha ha.”
Of course I don’t correct his misconception. And I make a mental note to clue Taylor in on the fact that she’s now officially my alibi.
He’s looking at me suspiciously now, so I realize I might not have covered it up very well. It dawns on me that normally I wouldn’t have even told him what I was planning to do with Taylor. I’m in college, after all. Not a little girl anymore.
“I know I don’t have to tell you all my plans,” I quickly tell him. “But it’s just that you had mentioned maybe going to the lake. In general, though, like you, I really should keep my personal life private.”
“You don’t really have that option, when it comes to some of my rules,” he says, and winks at me. “You’re still living under my roof of course, and I’m funding a portion of your college education, and I don’t need certain things flaunted in my face.”
He says it in a jesting manner but my mouth still drops open a bit.
How could he possibly know about…?
“I know more than you think, too,” he says. “Your old dad is smarter than you give him credit for as well.”
“Umm. Okay,” I tell him, feeling tongue-tied.
“I want to trust your judgment, Chelsea. I just want you to be careful.”
“Okay Dad,” I say, hurriedly backing out of his room before I give myself away. “Nice talk. Thanks a lot.”
“You too,” he calls out after me.
How does he expect me to be careful when I’m knowingly walking into a risky situation?
I don’t know how much he knows— or thinks he knows— or how, but I’m not about to fall into his apparent trap and give up my secrets. Wesley clearly needs to keep his spot on my dad’s team. And I need to let loose and take a walk on the wild side with Wesley, without getting my entire heart caught up in the matter.
That should be a simple task.
Anyone could do it.
Anyone except those cheerleaders at his other school.
But I’m wiser than they are. I know exactly what I’m getting into, and I want to.
And there’s no way I’m spilling my guts to my dad and ruining it just when it got started.