Chapter 20 – Brad
We slept in on Sunday morning. The night at the event had gone well. After supper, there had been speeches, and each of my team members had donated a large sum of money to charity. I had spoken in front of everyone.
Usually, I hated speaking in public. It reminded me of school when I had to talk in front of the class, and they would all stare at me, and I would feel on the spot. This time, it had been different. Carly had been there, watching me, hanging on my every word, and I had spoken just for her.
Afterward, we had come home, and I had fallen asleep with her in my arms. We had skipped the sex, which was difficult for me. But, after what had happened, knowing she had felt so vulnerable and exposed… I just wanted to let her know she was safe with me. That, just like back in high school, I wasn’t with her just for the sex.
Waking up to her in my bed next to me was total bliss. Her dark hair fanned out on my pillows, her dark lashes against her cheeks, and she looked as young and as pure as she had been when I’d met her. I stroked her cheek with the back of my fingers, and her eyes fluttered open.
“Morning,” I said.
She smiled, and it was radiant.
“Morning,” she answered. “What time is it?”
“Time for brunch with the guys,” I said. “Are you up for it?”
Carly took a moment to think about it before she nodded. She had met the guys and their women. Now, she wasn’t so foreign anymore.
We took turns showering and got dressed. I put on jeans and a collared shirt with Italian loafers that cost the same as a small car. When I found Carly in the bedroom, she wore a white maxi dress that cinched at the waist, making her skin look like caramel, and her dark hair hung down her back in a braid.
“You look fantastic,” I said.
She laughed. “You always say that.”
“It’s always true.”
Carly was at home in my place, and it had happened in a very short time. She moved around the place as if she lived here, fetching herself something to eat from the fridge or making coffee for us both. It was wonderful having her around.
“I have to check my emails before we go,” I said. “Sit with me?”
She agreed, and I took my laptop to the living room. I sat on the couch, taking care of business while Carly walked around, looking at the pictures of the stars.
“You’re not here,” she said.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“The photographs you blew up. There isn’t one of you.”
I laughed. “These are the legends of the past, the heroes of the sport. I’m not nearly what they were. One day, I hope to be. But for now, I look at the faces of the men I hope to be.”
Carly smiled and came to sit next to me. “I’m sure you can do it. You’ll get there.”
I put my hand on her neck, my thumb stroking her jaw. She had always been so supportive of me. It was largely thanks to her that I had gotten this far at all. When we had been in school together, it was Carly that had taught me to be who I was and not who everyone expected me to be. It was thanks to her that I had started to embrace the person I was behind closed doors.
Even after I’d lost her, I’d held onto that, and it was one of the reasons I’d excelled.
In the car, Carly was quiet, looking out of the window. I was trying to hold back, not to speed. She was in the car with me, and I had to behave.
“Are you okay?” I asked her after a while.
“Yeah,” she said in a soft voice.
“Are you sure?”
She sighed. “I don’t know. I feel overwhelmed, to be honest. This is all a lot to take in.”
I nodded. “I can understand that. This life is very different from life in Laramie. And it’s very different from life in Colorado too, I can imagine.”
She nodded. “I’m trying, of course. It’s just a little harder than I thought. Especially because of us being in the news together. It feels like I’ve been left open and a little vulnerable. If that makes sense.”
“It does,” I said. “But you have to remember that what they say in the papers and on the news is seldom true.”
Carly nodded. “Kina said that to me last night, too. It’s good to know that the people close to you think that, but what about everyone else?”
“They don’t matter,” I said. “What matters is you and me, and what I think of all this. And I think the world of you. It means a lot to me that you’re trying so hard. I appreciate it.”
Carly smiled at me. I reached across and took her hand, squeezing it.
We arrived at 27 Restaurant where I had arranged with the guys to meet for brunch. On Sundays, they served eclectic, a la carte brunch dishes and cocktails, and the atmosphere was amazing. I had the idea the place used to be an old house, and it had been made up with wooden plank floors and light walls with French windows. It felt like you were dining at home.
Brian and Hanson were already there. We greeted them, and I watched Carly hug Lacey and Stacey. She seemed more relaxed around them now. It wasn’t only because we were all dressed in casual clothes, where last night had been very dressy. It was also because she knew them a little and because my friends were welcoming and very liberal. They weren’t judgmental at all, and it was very easy to like them.
We sat down and talked about the night before. The paper was full of high praise for the Florida Sharks and their generous donations.
“It helps with your image, picking you back up,” Hanson said. “Lacey is pleased.”
“I’m glad,” I said. “I got a tongue lashing from Kina when it happened.”
Just as I spoke of Kina, Jacob and Kina arrived. We greeted them all again and sat down. I looked at Carly, but she was already in deep conversation with the women. I could relax and enjoy myself.
Brunch went well. It was great hanging out with my friends in an environment that had no pressure. When we trained together, and it was football season, we spent time together, but it wasn’t the same. Now, we were relaxed and comfortable, we didn’t have to watch what we ate too much, and we could drink a few drinks if we wanted to.
Seeing Carly around my friends also made me happy. I liked her in my life, living alongside me. I had missed having her around. Moving away hadn’t stopped the pain of losing her. It had only been a distraction.
“How are you two holding up to the media pressure?” Jacob asked.
“We’re doing okay,” I said. “It’s a little overwhelming for Carly. She told me she’s struggling with the whole thing, but I think we’ll be alright. It seems to be blowing over faster than I thought it would.”
“That’s because it’s your first real scandal. Trust me. When it’s a habit that you get in trouble with girls, you don’t get away from it so easily.”
I laughed and shook my head. Hanson had had a terrible track record when he met Lacey. She had been assigned as his PR Manager because he was caught with a different woman—or women—every weekend. They had fallen in love, and it was only because Lacey is such a handful that Hanson calmed down at all. The man had never shied away from a challenge.
“Well, I’m not planning on making it a habit,” I said. I wanted things to stay comfortable between Carly and me, and if she was already feeling overwhelmed, bad publicity was the last thing she needed.
Brian nudged me. “So, this is the one, huh?” he asked.
I shook my head, smiling. “I don’t know,” I said. “We’re taking it slow.”
“Really? Looks to me like there’s nothing slow happening there. You’re whipped, man.”
I laughed. “No, it’s not like that. I mean, I like her. But I don’t know if I love her. You know? We were high school sweethearts, but that was a long time ago. We’re all grown up now.”
“Don’t even start with me on the whole high school sweetheart thing,” Brian said. “Trust me, it can be your soul mate.”
Brian and Stacey had been sweethearts before she’d lost her memories through a terrible head injury. They were more than fine now. He had never given up on her, she had regained her memories, and the rest was history.
“I don’t know, man,” I said.
The guys exchanged glances, but I ignored them. I didn’t know what was happening or how I felt. All I knew was that I had Carly with me now, and that was enough. I would only focus on this day that we had together.
My friends were sure I felt something for her, and they weren’t wrong. I did feel something for her. But was she my future, the way they’d all found theirs? I wanted her to be, but I didn’t know how she felt about things. I was just happy that Carly was in my life again, even if we ended up being friends.
It was the second time I’d thought about it that way, and I felt sick to my stomach again. I didn’t want us to be friends. I wanted so much more with her. She had never been the kind of girl I could just be friends with. But if that was what it came down to, being friends would be better than nothing at all. And I would rather have her in my life on those terms than lose her again.
I pushed the thoughts away. We weren’t there, anyway. I didn’t know if we would go there, eventually, but we weren’t there now.
“Are you doing okay?” I asked Carly toward the end of brunch.
She was smiling, her eyes sparkling, and she wasn’t nearly as unsure and wilted as she had seemed earlier.
“I’m having a great time,” she said. “I really like your friends.”
“They like you, too,” I said. “Do you want to have them over for dinner tonight?” Carly nodded excitedly. “We would have to cook for them. I don’t have my chef on call when I’m not training.”
Carly laughed. “Don’t worry, us common folk can cook. It’s the one thing I’ll be able to do in this place and feel comfortable about. We’ll do it together.”
I kissed her on the forehead and nodded. When I extended the invitation to my friends, they all accepted right away.
When we left the restaurant, we drove home, and Carly insisted on making a list of things we needed to buy. She wanted to make chicken— apparently, it was her specialty— and she wanted to make a special kind of salad that needed sourdough bread and olives and all sorts of things my chef would have known much better than I did.
Carly was in her element, going through recipes on her phone and deciding what to make. I hadn’t known this side of her when we were kids. We hadn’t had to do things like this, then. I took a mental note of her love for food and cooking, and I was happy that she had found something that made her feel at home here.
We went to the store together and got everything on her list. Olives, cherry tomatoes, basil, red onion, French bread, and ingredients for Coronation Chicken, whatever that was.
When we got back home, we started cooking. I let her tell me what to do, and she danced around the kitchen like it was her domain. When I watched her put the ingredients for the salad together, I realized I loved her. A big part of me had always known it, but now I knew for sure that it was the forever kind of love. I realized I wanted her in my life just like I wanted her in my home. Until this moment, I hadn’t known where we were headed or what it was what I wanted, but I suddenly knew.
I wanted her to be mine, for good.